iiinova — where your digital self keeps evolving

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𝙱𝚊𝚋𝚎 𝚁𝚞𝚝𝚑𝚕𝚎𝚜𝚜 @unfitz.bsky.social · 27/08/2026

To an octopus, tentacle porn is just porn.

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Uncle Duke @uncleduke1969.bsky.social · 27/08/2026

“You’re twenty years old, know two hundred words in three different languages, and you spend your days in a cage, shitting on newspaper and begging for crackers. Where the fuck did it all go wrong, Patrick? Thank God your mother isn’t alive to see this, it would break her heart.”

A green parrot is looking into a mirror, seemingly examining its reflection.

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A.L. likely @alvildalikely.bsky.social · 27/08/2026

Does anyone remember a few years back when a lady tried to outrun the cops at a Wal-Mart on one of those riding carts while drinking wine out of a Pringles can? Stay tuned for the sequel.

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A.L. likely @alvildalikely.bsky.social · 26/08/2026

It's International Dog Day. I'm only talking to dogs today. Show me your dog.

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Seamus O'Flaugherty @seamussaid.bsky.social · 27/08/2026

*heart monitor flatlines* Doctor: I'm so sorry My oldest son: nah I've seen him like this before just play an old Van Halen song he'll get up

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Jane, actually @maidofbeans.bsky.social · 27/08/2026

When they said the internet is forever I had no idea we'd all just be trapped here for eternity like the plot from an episode of Black Mirror.

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Cosmic Clau @cosmicclau.bsky.social · 27/08/2026

being a responsible adult and eating a balanced diet . . . . don't look down here . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . (grazing on complete garbage but finishing off with an apple)

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bacon popsicle 🧴 @gupton68.bsky.social · 26/10/2023

I really like the word aesthetic, it's so pleasant on the eye. I wonder if there’s a word to describe that.

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bacon popsicle 🧴 @gupton68.bsky.social · 04/09/2023

My favouritest numbers, ranked: 10 tacles 9 ~ see also niet, non, no, nee, não etc. 8 🎱 7 deadly sins 6 the word for coitus in New Zealand 5 stars, would definitely recommend 4 skin 3 way 2 ti frutti 1 derwall

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bacon popsicle 🧴 @gupton68.bsky.social · 06/01/2025

Using the word 'boobies' is not acceptable for a man of my age. At least it isn't if I'm listing them in the 𝘩𝘰𝘣𝘣𝘪𝘦𝘴 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘴𝘱𝘦𝘤𝘪𝘢𝘭 𝘪𝘯𝘵𝘦𝘳𝘦𝘴𝘵𝘴 section of my resumé, apparently.

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Dropped Mike @rebrafsim.bsky.social · 16/02/2024

you’re not allowed to make up words it’s illexical

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𝙱𝚊𝚋𝚎 𝚁𝚞𝚝𝚑𝚕𝚎𝚜𝚜 @unfitz.bsky.social · 28/01/2025

Why bother learning big words when you can fabricaciously prestidigitize them?

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Jimmer Cork-Bottle @jimmerthatisall.bsky.social · 27/08/2026

This day in history. 1927. Five women petitioned the Supreme Court of Canada asking "Does the word persons include female persons?" No, said the court, but the Privy Council overruled. The women became known as the Famous Five or the Valiant Five or, for security reasons, the Five Chinese Brothers.

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bacon popsicle 🧴 @gupton68.bsky.social · 26/08/2026

If less conventional sexual practices make you feel uncomfortable perhaps you’re just not using enough lube?

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A.L. likely @alvildalikely.bsky.social · 21/08/2026

Cindy, I spent well over a decade treating gunshot wounds and scraping other humans off the pavement. I'm not sure I'm the best person to validate your "trauma" purchasing lipstick yesterday unless the clerk shoved it into your eye.

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Idle @hatesnicethings.bsky.social · 27/08/2026

I tried to catfish a lady with a photocopy of that arm & hammer logo and it almost worked because she had a cable modem.

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Clam_Daniel @clamdaniel.bsky.social · 27/08/2026

We all deserve someone who gasps at all the right times when we’re telling a story.

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crumbum @fuwolfman.bsky.social · 27/08/2026

Same with whenever I end up stuck between god and the devil, I call Moe in that particular trinity.

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Skinnie Talls @skinnietalls.bsky.social · 27/08/2026

it rubs the lotion on its skin and it struggles with the doorknobs again

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Bram Stoker’s K 🧛🏻‍♂️ @gimmethekspecial.bsky.social · 26/05/2026

all I need to stay happy is an endless supply of external validation simple really

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Jim @jimstewart.bsky.social · 27/08/2026

Displaying my sexual prowess by balancing a piece of cheese on my foot, while holding the refrigerator door open with my other foot. Maintaining eye contact.

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Marc @runoldman.bsky.social · 26/08/2026

Sucks in stomach. Another chin pops out.

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Grant Tanaka @granttanaka.bsky.social · 27/08/2026

Please understand that I just want to be loved, for you to realize that I'm special, that I’m only here on this earth for a brief, rare moment in time, covered in bbq sauce, like a McRib

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Lizzy @stonedeva.bsky.social · 27/08/2026

Surprisingly few posted for International Hog Day

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(spoo)key @lefttwix.com · 27/08/2026

so many cabbage patch kids but where were all the cabbage patch adults?

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born miserable @bornmiserable.bsky.social · 26/08/2026

I may have a lot of regrets, but I also have room for so many more

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Tusk Jenkins @tuskjenkins.bsky.social · 27/08/2026

If by hats we pass in a dark alley, tipping ourselves at each other in surprised and frantic code, just know we couldn't have prepared. This wasn't in any of the fears and paranoia never mentioned it in class

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John Carpenter’s The Alex Nevil @thealexnevil.bsky.social · 26/08/2026

Doc: I have some bad news Me: The institute rejected my brain donation 𝘢𝘨𝘢𝘪𝘯??! Doc: It really does have to be 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳 brain.

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John Carpenter’s The Alex Nevil @thealexnevil.bsky.social · 27/08/2026

*re-reads instruction manual “Oooooh, I was supposed to let the concrete dry with my feet in it before pushing it into the water. I‘m a silly goose.”

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🅱️oofessor Killosk 👻🔪 @professorkiosk.wtf · 27/08/2026

socks are just analog shoes

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Siege @tellumsiege.bsky.social · 27/08/2026

A Drowning Pool parody band called Swimming Pool.

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Charlie Alzamora @chalza.bsky.social · 30/05/2026

Some supposed literary classics haven't aged well but The Picture of Dorian Gray never gets old.

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Kat Alderson 🙃 @klaybourne.bsky.social · 27/08/2026

him: where did these six bags of Doritos come from? me: the store him: me: I had a fiduciary responsibility to purchase them him: *arch look* me: they were BOGO, limit three offers him: me: an investment in our future him: if I admit the pecuniary advantage will you make a nachos now?

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