iiinova — where your digital self keeps evolving

key @lefttwix.com · 56m

bro would you even kidnap the sandy claws with me?

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🧩 @holojester.bsky.social · 1h

bro youre kind of making it hard for humankind to reach our age of enlightenment rn

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arcadus @birdapp.rip · 1h

“say goodbye to the top few layers of butthole skin”

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𝙱𝚊𝚋𝚎 𝚁𝚞𝚝𝚑𝚕𝚎𝚜𝚜 @unfitz.bsky.social · 2h

She had the voice of an angel. An angel who smokes 2 packs of unfiltered Luckies on the daily.

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futuredadOfTwo🙋🏻‍♂️ @lacroixboi.dadguy.pro · 2h

most mimes stick to the following code:

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Rob (the floor one) @floorisbed.bsky.social · 1h

my globetrotting baby sister is now on etsy selling curated travel kits based on what she needs and uses while on the move traveling? have a look tell her rob sent you www.etsy.com/shop/PortCol...

text says:
port collective
now open
use code POCOLAUNCH for 10 percent off your purchase

text-only image listing the contents of one of three options

for the business traveler or frequent flyer

thoughtfully packed in a reusable pouch

retractable USB-C cord
custom size earplugs and case
pill case
perfume atomizer
hard ginger candy
electrolyte powder
tissues
hand sanitizer wipe
sewing kit
floss picks and case
soap strips
mints
citrus packets
blister bandages
stain remover wipe
hand sanitizer single

text-only image listing the contents of one of three options

for the everyday traveler

thoughtfully packed in a reusable pouch

jewelry pouch
custom size earplugs and case
pill case
perfume atomizer
hard ginger candy
electrolyte powder
tissues
hand sanitizer wipe
sewing kit
floss picks and case
soap strips
mints
citrus packets
blister bandages
stain remover wipe
hand sanitizer single

text-only image listing the contents of one of three options

for the girls trip

thoughtfully packed in a reusable pouch

touch-up kickstand mirror
jewelry pouch
pill case
perfume atomizer
hard ginger candy
electrolyte powder
tissues
hand sanitizer wipe
sewing kit
earplugs with case
floss picks
floss case
soap strips
mints
citrus packets
blister bandages
stain remover wipe
hand sanitizer single

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T @mamafirefly.bsky.social · 12h

‘you’re too sensitive’ or maybe your planet is too insensitive

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✧𝔪𝔲𝔡 𝔰𝔠𝔞𝔪𝔭✧ @altaudge.bsky.social · 2h

today is a great day to kick some dick

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🅿️rofessor Kiosk 💊 @professorkiosk.wtf · 12h

we used to put our heart and soul into things, now we just make marvel movies

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KaiJen M(s) 🏵️🎉 @jenetmms.bsky.social · 1h

I've been talking to the trees and they agree, you're pretty amazing. The mushrooms still don't trust you tho (they don't trust anyone)

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Misery Highlight @miseryhighlight.bsky.social · 2h

Thank you for your disinterest

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gwen pepperoni 🏳️‍⚧️🤘🏼🍕 @gwenpepperoni.myatproto.social · 1h

I'm sorry. I know you all love American dad and whatever but this is the least appealing thing in the world to me

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phil mccrevice @jewkrainian.bsky.social · 1h

i don’t think many people realize just how EGREGIOUS the Man City cheating is. like easily the worst case of fraud in sports history. they inflated their revenue by nearly 1.2 BILLION dollars over 9 seasons and had their owner secretly fund transfers and fees. they paid off journalists to report

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𝙱𝚊𝚋𝚎 𝚁𝚞𝚝𝚑𝚕𝚎𝚜𝚜 @unfitz.bsky.social · 1h

“Caregiver” means a person who gives care. Why doesn’t “caretaker” mean someone who takes care away? Just give me one week with the English language and I will make shit right.

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Amy @msfoxifurnasty.bsky.social · 19h

i’m never gonna dance again, guilty feet cause a gravitational incident that disrupts the tides and strands sea creatures

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✧𝔪𝔲𝔡 𝔰𝔠𝔞𝔪𝔭✧ @altaudge.bsky.social · 2h

can i come over and set you on fire?

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alber @captainacabairbud.myatproto.social · 3h

when your post is just too good

a bluesky notification that tells me it failed to delete post, please try again

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PhantomDeeks 🫶 @deeks549.bsky.social · 1h

They should invent a me that doesn't suck

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Jerry Chen @jcsalterego.bsky.social · 1h

(standing in front of the "inability to hold two things in my head at once" factory)

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✧𝔪𝔲𝔡 𝔰𝔠𝔞𝔪𝔭✧ @altaudge.bsky.social · 2h

i think the worms in my brain would be really good friends with the worms in your brain

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Pru @prufrockluvsong.bsky.social · 1h

Too bad most men will never know the joy of finding a morsel of food that fell in their bra

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inkedupandsonic @sonictyrant.bsky.social · 1h

A semicolon is just a regular colon that needs a fluffer

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smillz @righttwix.com · 3h

if you fall and your friends are concerned instead of laughing then you’re old now

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Sidereal K 💫 @gimmethekspecial.bsky.social · 2h

I don’t have problems I am the problem

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✨✨✨ @redactedpunished.bsky.social · 4h

✨ v i b e s ✨

BUTT MADE OF STRAWS
SO YOU CAN SUCK MY ASS

it’s a butt made of straws

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slacey AKA Ted Slaines @shortking.boston · 3h

swirling wheel of purity is my anime finishing move

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✨✨✨ @redactedpunished.bsky.social · 11h

need the sandpaper option for exfoliating

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mav @mav.wtf · 13h

Me: relaxing Internet: HERES A CHOP SAW FOR YOUR ASSHOLE

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smillz @righttwix.com · 14h

moves the poop from the butthole to the ballsack with ease

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andy 🅱️ @bugay.bsky.social · 14h

the swirling wheel of purity, as revelations foretold

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smillz @righttwix.com · 14h

the most powerful ring in middle earth was actually morgoth’s cock ring

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key @lefttwix.com · 14h

tired: bidet wired: cleANUS

the box for the "cleANUS - swirling wheel of purity" the box is light teal and white and features a picture of a white toilet with a green circular brush wheel mounted inside the bowl, connected by a belt to a handle. texts on the box say things like "say goodbye to toilet paper expenses" "softouch rotation technology" "5 year warranty or 10,000 flushes" and "this product proudly stands with the “replace all usa toilet paper” movement 2024" there are badges in the bottom right for "2023 top 5 innovations in the usa" and "approved international association of forest defenders"

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key @lefttwix.com · 29/09/2026

sweet caroline? i heard she was kinda a bitch

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EMCKAYVEE @youremceekayvee.bsky.social · 15h

🗣️Mooooooooooommmmmmm a guy from the internet is mad at me!

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Icarus 🎃 Dumpsterfire @pluperfectidiot.bsky.social · 15h

Staring you down like you're the last Cheeto in the bag

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Luke Ontario @coolhand.bsky.social · 17h

I have no idea if this is true but the collage kills me

A black lemur in a leafy tree with its mouth open as if singing, beside an inset photo of Pavarotti striking a similar pose. Text reads: “New research shows lemurs use operatic techniques when they sing, to reach high notes.” Classic FM.

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SpatialKimtamine @kimmalien.bsky.social · 22/07/2026

I’m sorry but my coffee maker has done more for me than most people

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Corduroy Cheddar @corduroycheddar.bsky.social · 19h

But what IS on your bingo card?

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Cosmic Clau @cosmicclau.bsky.social · 16h

them: when exactly did you become so jaded me: around the time i stopped wearing candy necklaces

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gwen pepperoni 🏳️‍⚧️🤘🏼🍕 @gwenpepperoni.myatproto.social · 16h

whoever decided scrollbars need to be a pixel wide and unusable needs to be shot then beheaded then pissed on then shit on then scattered on the beds of their children

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Fun @funkelly.bsky.social · 16h

please keep in mind that many shitheel things tucked into the big beautiful bill aren’t set to take effect until AFTER the midterms, because they know they’re fucked. so tell everyone this, as often as you can so no one forgets, because the republicans WILL blame everything in that bill on democrats

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Frances Meh @francesmeh.reviews · 15h

one thing i understand more and more as i get older is that i do not have to post every half-baked inane thought that blows through my weary, addled brain. i do it by choice. i can stop anytime i want.

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Greg the Miller @gregthemiller.bsky.social · 15h

a necklace for your wrist is called a wristlace

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key @lefttwix.com · 17h

whenever brandon bussi gets scored on, i say “ooof, right in the bussy” anyway, hockey is back!

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Boo B 👻🐝 @vtbee80.bsky.social · 17h

i only work out so i can change the Brita filter without breaking a sweat

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stefan @stefanthinks.bsky.social · 17h

it’s so terrible how movies like jaws glorify getting eaten by a shark

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🏴‍☠️ Jollyrobber 🏴‍☠️ @jollyrobber.bsky.social · 20h

🎶 I wanna rock right now I'm Pope Leo & I came to get down I'm now internationally known and I'm known to rock a microphone I get stupid I mean outrageous I'll heal you if you're contagious 🎶

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dawn of the debb @debbshock.blue · 19h

you are all my imaginary friends. (yes, even you. even you that I never talk to but I see your posts. I see you.)

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raindro g @raindro.bsky.social · 26/09/2026

the root of charming is harming. stay alert

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