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🎃EM-SCREAM-KAYVEE 🔪

@emceekayvee.bsky.social
9.5K followers 5.1K following 34K posts

I have many books. Thrift store whore. Fuck ICE Fuck TRUMP Fuck the NRA Fuck RELIGION Fuck FLOCK cams Shop Riot Gear: riotgearpress.com Contributor to: @riversidecasino.bsky.social @greenevillezoo.bsky.social @sorrowscopes.bsky.social

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🎃EM-SCREAM-KAYVEE 🔪 @emceekayvee.bsky.social · 13/09/2026
Reposting b/c Ko-fi unpublished my page, so here's my Venmo: As many of you know, I was fired from my non-profit job 2 wks ago for my social media despite me never disclosing my name, location, profession, or org. I was there for ~9 yrs & had built a career. My benefits/insurance were gone same day.
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Viktor Winetrout @viktorwinetrout.bsky.social · 5h
Due to an unforeseen tragedy, I am officially shutting down my kid-a-pult
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Viktor Winetrout @viktorwinetrout.bsky.social · 5h
Walked into McDonald’s wearing my Grimace costume and the manager tased me
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Joe Brian 🇺🇦 will win @mrjoebrian.bsky.social · 11h
This made me laugh
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🎃EM-SCREAM-KAYVEE 🔪 @youremceekayvee.bsky.social · 9h
I wish I wasn't so cool. It's not fair to the rest of you.
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🎃EM-SCREAM-KAYVEE 🔪 @youremceekayvee.bsky.social · 9h
"Look for the blessings in every situation" type shit people who have never had genuinely horrific situations say.
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🎃EM-SCREAM-KAYVEE 🔪 @youremceekayvee.bsky.social · 29/06/2026
S-type thing
a gold stylized S is in my ear with a bunch of small gold hoops.
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🎃EM-SCREAM-KAYVEE 🔪 @youremceekayvee.bsky.social · 14h
I blame my entire lack of progress and repetition of toxic patterns and bad choices on all the kids who wrote in my yearbook, "don't ever change." FUCK YOU GUYS, I NEED TO CHANGE BUT YOU WON'T LET ME.
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🎃EM-SCREAM-KAYVEE 🔪 @youremceekayvee.bsky.social · 16h
I'm not a wedding crasher, but I will ruin the fuck out of a marriage.* *my own
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𝙱𝚊𝚋𝚎 𝚁𝚞𝚝𝚑𝚕𝚎𝚜𝚜 @unfitz.bsky.social · 16h
Got thrown out of the PTA meeting for ending the pledge of allegiance “with biberty and justice for all.”
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𝙱𝚊𝚋𝚎 𝚁𝚞𝚝𝚑𝚕𝚎𝚜𝚜 @unfitz.bsky.social · 16h
My Disney villain sex worker name is Captain Hooker.
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🎃EM-SCREAM-KAYVEE 🔪 @youremceekayvee.bsky.social · 19h
What does it mean about me that 3 people total, 1 being an ex bf, have sent me this?
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🎃EM-SCREAM-KAYVEE 🔪 @youremceekayvee.bsky.social · 19h
Him: I bought wi-fi on my flight just to talk to you. Me: How much was it? I'll Venmo you a refund. *licks switchblade*
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🎃EM-SCREAM-KAYVEE 🔪 @youremceekayvee.bsky.social · 20h
Which one of you sick fucks saved this?
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🎃EM-SCREAM-KAYVEE 🔪 @youremceekayvee.bsky.social · 20h
Hello, 911? Yes, I’m sick with a bad cold, but I can’t stop being sexy.
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🎃EM-SCREAM-KAYVEE 🔪 @youremceekayvee.bsky.social · 22h
Well, I had pretty much lost my voice from the show but now I’m full on sick with a cold. Be warned.
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𝙱𝚊𝚋𝚎 𝚁𝚞𝚝𝚑𝚕𝚎𝚜𝚜 @unfitz.bsky.social · 05/10/2026
My body is a temple. My head has two temples. I attended Temple University. I forgot where I was going with this.
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ande91.bsky.social @ande91.bsky.social · 04/10/2026
A cartoon of 2 Victorian dressed women sitting on a couch and one says "I miss him" and the other woman says "which one"?
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🎃EM-SCREAM-KAYVEE 🔪 @youremceekayvee.bsky.social · 04/10/2026
Last night at the show a drunk guy was basically like ON my shoulder, almost looking at my phone with me and leaning on me. I had a pocket knife in my jacket and didn't choose violence, so please clap. At one point he said, "you smell so good" and I was like, "weird, b/c you really don't."
a meme with a horse silhouette in the sunset and the words "White Boy Why..."
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🎃EM-SCREAM-KAYVEE 🔪 @youremceekayvee.bsky.social · 04/10/2026
I'm sorry that I ruined your wedding. I'm sorry that, as the bride, I ruined your wedding.
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Viktor Winetrout @viktorwinetrout.bsky.social · 04/10/2026
Telling a child that they were adopted is the hardest thing about being a party clown
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🎃EM-SCREAM-KAYVEE 🔪 @youremceekayvee.bsky.social · 04/10/2026
I'm sorry that I stabbed you when you mansplained the music of a band I like, but I was sad that you were stupid enough to do that, and everyone grieves differently.
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polyheathen @kipoca.bsky.social · 04/10/2026
Why are guitarists always covering up their dicks with the guitar. We want to see the dicks.
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🎃EM-SCREAM-KAYVEE 🔪 @youremceekayvee.bsky.social · 04/10/2026
Staying up a hours in a modern long distance dating argument via text can best be described as a Three Dot Night.
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Shitposts In Tiaras @shitpostsintiaras.bsky.social · 04/10/2026
Total ellipsis of the heart 🏆👑 Congratulations @knewagirlnic.bsky.social from @youremceekayvee.bsky.social
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Shitposts In Tiaras @shitpostsintiaras.bsky.social · 04/10/2026
You have to be a real anteloper to get to gnow them that well 🏆👑 Congratulations @youremceekayvee.bsky.social from @portmanteauface.bsky.social
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🎃EM-SCREAM-KAYVEE 🔪 @youremceekayvee.bsky.social · 04/10/2026
How am I supposed to be to my full dumbest without a poll feature on here? I be making polls for my friends on Signal like: Which is true? ⭕️ Emcee is a goddess ⭕️ I have diminished mental function which results in me being unable to determine proper goddess status in a true goddess like Emcee
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🎃EM-SCREAM-KAYVEE 🔪 @youremceekayvee.bsky.social · 04/10/2026
Well, the wishes of a million people are coming true this morning: I’ve awakened with almost no voice after the show yesterday.
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Cosmically Funny @cosmicallyf.bsky.social · 04/10/2026
If you don't have anything nice to say, at least say something funny.
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🎃EM-SCREAM-KAYVEE 🔪 @youremceekayvee.bsky.social · 04/10/2026
Crying! At the Punk Show 😍Lagwagon😍 played Brown Eyed Girl, which my dad used to play for me (bc you know-brown eyed girl.) There was 1 woman to 7819 dudes at this show & the guys beside me held me up & scream-sang it to me. Festival ended on a high note, despite the wind and some rain (bad hair!)
Emceekayvee is a blonde and silver haired Caucasian woman who is 50 years old. She is wearing reflective, sunglasses, a yellow T-shirt, and an Army jacket. She is throwing up the horns and is outside.
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🎃EM-SCREAM-KAYVEE 🔪 @youremceekayvee.bsky.social · 04/10/2026
People are always so shocked that I’ve never had a one night stand, but like, do I *look* like the kind of drum you bang one time?
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🎃EM-SCREAM-KAYVEE 🔪 @youremceekayvee.bsky.social · 04/10/2026
Did you know that there are subtle differences amongst wildebeests that a lot of people don’t know about? Yeah, it’s gnuanced.
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🎃EM-SCREAM-KAYVEE 🔪 @youremceekayvee.bsky.social · 03/10/2026
Announcement: when we replace words like “wrinkles” with cutesy alternatives like “experience lines,” we are further reinforcing that there is something wrong with wrinkles/aging. Stop that.
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🎃EM-SCREAM-KAYVEE 🔪 @youremceekayvee.bsky.social · 03/10/2026
When you have your kid with you at a punk show and your co-parent is less punk than you.
Screenshot of texts with my ex and me
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Viktor Winetrout @viktorwinetrout.bsky.social · 03/10/2026
Just saw my 5th grade math teacher at Chili’s. I yelled “isosceles triangle” and he gave me a thumbs up
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🎃EM-SCREAM-KAYVEE 🔪 @youremceekayvee.bsky.social · 03/10/2026
Shirt o the day
A vintage yellow t-shirt says “orgasmic chemist”
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Idle @hatesnicethings.bsky.social · 01/04/2026
We are all in this together. That is how meat grinders work.
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🎃EM-SCREAM-KAYVEE 🔪 @youremceekayvee.bsky.social · 03/10/2026
Menstruating! At the Punk Show 😒😒😒😒😒😒😒😒
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𝔄𝔯𝔦𝔢𝔰 𝔙𝔢𝔦𝔩 @ariesveil.bsky.social · 03/10/2026
This could be us, but you have taste.
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Shitposts In Tiaras @shitpostsintiaras.bsky.social · 03/10/2026
She didn't win any rodeos with reverse cowgirl either 🏆👑 Congratulations @youremceekayvee.bsky.social from @portmanteauface.bsky.social
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Viktor Winetrout @viktorwinetrout.bsky.social · 03/10/2026
Kill me once, shame on you. That’s pretty much it
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🎃EM-SCREAM-KAYVEE 🔪 @youremceekayvee.bsky.social · 03/10/2026
Everyone at this “punk” show has on a wedding ring. Not very punk if you ask me. Sellouts. 🤘🏼
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