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muffin oracle🔮🍦ʰᶦᵍʰ ᵖʳᶦᵉˢᵗᵉˢˢ ᵒᶠ ᵗʰᵉ ᶦᶜᵉ ᶜʳᵉᵃᵐ ᵈᶦᵐᵉⁿˢᶦᵒⁿ 🎉🧁

@snappleroan.bsky.social
5.2K followers 1K following 4.8K posts

💗microinfluential shitposter💗 yappin: bsky.app/profile/did:plc:zybsme5whb… top 40s: bsky.app/profile/did:plc:zybsme5whb… 💖 linktr.ee/minimuffin

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Reposted by muffin oracle🔮🍦ʰᶦᵍʰ ᵖʳᶦᵉˢᵗᵉˢˢ ᵒᶠ ᵗʰᵉ ᶦᶜᵉ ᶜʳᵉᵃᵐ ᵈᶦᵐᵉⁿˢᶦᵒⁿ 🎉🧁
­­ ­ ­ the­ ­­ ­ ­ ghostes @rem.bsjky.team · 13/10/2023
laika is happy and playing on the moon with the other space dogs. she played fetch with buzz aldrin and he left the tennis ball
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Reposted by muffin oracle🔮🍦ʰᶦᵍʰ ᵖʳᶦᵉˢᵗᵉˢˢ ᵒᶠ ᵗʰᵉ ᶦᶜᵉ ᶜʳᵉᵃᵐ ᵈᶦᵐᵉⁿˢᶦᵒⁿ 🎉🧁
The Card @thecard.bsky.social · 15h
🎶Say my username, say my username🎶
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Reposted by muffin oracle🔮🍦ʰᶦᵍʰ ᵖʳᶦᵉˢᵗᵉˢˢ ᵒᶠ ᵗʰᵉ ᶦᶜᵉ ᶜʳᵉᵃᵐ ᵈᶦᵐᵉⁿˢᶦᵒⁿ 🎉🧁
Braden Serkas @portmanteauface.bsky.social · 17h
Raisinets is a weird name choice. You expect them to be diminutive raisins, or somehow feminized like the Rockettes. What the fuck is even happening anymore
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Reposted by muffin oracle🔮🍦ʰᶦᵍʰ ᵖʳᶦᵉˢᵗᵉˢˢ ᵒᶠ ᵗʰᵉ ᶦᶜᵉ ᶜʳᵉᵃᵐ ᵈᶦᵐᵉⁿˢᶦᵒⁿ 🎉🧁
jonny t🎃🎃thpick @jonnytoothpick.bsky.social · 15h
ℴ𝓊𝓇 𝒸𝒽𝒾𝓁𝒹𝓇ℯ𝓃 𝓌ℯ𝓇ℯ 𝓃ℴ𝓉 𝓉𝒶𝓊ℊ𝒽𝓉 𝒽ℴ𝓌 𝓉ℴ 𝓇ℯ𝒶𝒹 𝓉𝒽𝒾𝓈
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Reposted by muffin oracle🔮🍦ʰᶦᵍʰ ᵖʳᶦᵉˢᵗᵉˢˢ ᵒᶠ ᵗʰᵉ ᶦᶜᵉ ᶜʳᵉᵃᵐ ᵈᶦᵐᵉⁿˢᶦᵒⁿ 🎉🧁
Braden Serkas @portmanteauface.bsky.social · 20h
PAUL: you never give me your money GEORGE: it’s gonna take time PAUL: JOHN: all you need is love PAUL: RINGO: all I’ve got is a photograph PAUL: fuck you guys
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Reposted by muffin oracle🔮🍦ʰᶦᵍʰ ᵖʳᶦᵉˢᵗᵉˢˢ ᵒᶠ ᵗʰᵉ ᶦᶜᵉ ᶜʳᵉᵃᵐ ᵈᶦᵐᵉⁿˢᶦᵒⁿ 🎉🧁
violentlycar @violentlycar.bsky.social · 21h
fukuyama thought
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Reposted by muffin oracle🔮🍦ʰᶦᵍʰ ᵖʳᶦᵉˢᵗᵉˢˢ ᵒᶠ ᵗʰᵉ ᶦᶜᵉ ᶜʳᵉᵃᵐ ᵈᶦᵐᵉⁿˢᶦᵒⁿ 🎉🧁
Boochy Boo @frenchys-goldau.bsky.social · 13h
Yes I work at the CFARSAS (Center for Actual Research and Shit)
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Reposted by muffin oracle🔮🍦ʰᶦᵍʰ ᵖʳᶦᵉˢᵗᵉˢˢ ᵒᶠ ᵗʰᵉ ᶦᶜᵉ ᶜʳᵉᵃᵐ ᵈᶦᵐᵉⁿˢᶦᵒⁿ 🎉🧁
The Ken In Yellow @kenlowery.bsky.social · 04/10/2026
This morning I imagined a late night TV commercial for a compilation CD called "Wife Sounds"
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Reposted by muffin oracle🔮🍦ʰᶦᵍʰ ᵖʳᶦᵉˢᵗᵉˢˢ ᵒᶠ ᵗʰᵉ ᶦᶜᵉ ᶜʳᵉᵃᵐ ᵈᶦᵐᵉⁿˢᶦᵒⁿ 🎉🧁
Several Onions @amusitr0n.bsky.social · 28/11/2025
I hate the sound of macaroni my nightmares echo with the sickly fleshy smacking of wooden spoons agitating gooey pasta tubes
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Reposted by muffin oracle🔮🍦ʰᶦᵍʰ ᵖʳᶦᵉˢᵗᵉˢˢ ᵒᶠ ᵗʰᵉ ᶦᶜᵉ ᶜʳᵉᵃᵐ ᵈᶦᵐᵉⁿˢᶦᵒⁿ 🎉🧁
mensch @prettyvulgar.bsky.social · 28/04/2026
y’all I have to get this off my chest before it eats me up inside: I had a sex dream about Gritty the other night.
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Reposted by muffin oracle🔮🍦ʰᶦᵍʰ ᵖʳᶦᵉˢᵗᵉˢˢ ᵒᶠ ᵗʰᵉ ᶦᶜᵉ ᶜʳᵉᵃᵐ ᵈᶦᵐᵉⁿˢᶦᵒⁿ 🎉🧁
Jane, actually @maidofbeans.bsky.social · 04/10/2026
It's a beautiful day to throw your phone in the ocean.
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Reposted by muffin oracle🔮🍦ʰᶦᵍʰ ᵖʳᶦᵉˢᵗᵉˢˢ ᵒᶠ ᵗʰᵉ ᶦᶜᵉ ᶜʳᵉᵃᵐ ᵈᶦᵐᵉⁿˢᶦᵒⁿ 🎉🧁
Grue of Ill Wind Studios @illwinds.bsky.social · 02/10/2026
Tshirt saying IN THE SURVEILLANCE STATE WE'RE ALL CAM GIRLS
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muffin oracle🔮🍦ʰᶦᵍʰ ᵖʳᶦᵉˢᵗᵉˢˢ ᵒᶠ ᵗʰᵉ ᶦᶜᵉ ᶜʳᵉᵃᵐ ᵈᶦᵐᵉⁿˢᶦᵒⁿ 🎉🧁 @snappleroan.bsky.social · 01/10/2026
that seems reasonable
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Reposted by muffin oracle🔮🍦ʰᶦᵍʰ ᵖʳᶦᵉˢᵗᵉˢˢ ᵒᶠ ᵗʰᵉ ᶦᶜᵉ ᶜʳᵉᵃᵐ ᵈᶦᵐᵉⁿˢᶦᵒⁿ 🎉🧁
Jerry Chen @jcsalterego.bsky.social · 30/09/2026
this works best if you read the caption in elizabeth holmes's voice
the liberty biberty puppet looking at nathan fielder saying, "why would i liberty biberty you?"
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Reposted by muffin oracle🔮🍦ʰᶦᵍʰ ᵖʳᶦᵉˢᵗᵉˢˢ ᵒᶠ ᵗʰᵉ ᶦᶜᵉ ᶜʳᵉᵃᵐ ᵈᶦᵐᵉⁿˢᶦᵒⁿ 🎉🧁
Ian Coldwater 🧊🚫 @lookitup.baby · 30/09/2026
BREAKING NEWS: “Do geese see God” is a palindrome
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Reposted by muffin oracle🔮🍦ʰᶦᵍʰ ᵖʳᶦᵉˢᵗᵉˢˢ ᵒᶠ ᵗʰᵉ ᶦᶜᵉ ᶜʳᵉᵃᵐ ᵈᶦᵐᵉⁿˢᶦᵒⁿ 🎉🧁
Rachel @slightlycaustic.bsky.social · 29/09/2026
A path to happiness perhaps in another dimension?
A picture of the forest that is kind of off.
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Reposted by muffin oracle🔮🍦ʰᶦᵍʰ ᵖʳᶦᵉˢᵗᵉˢˢ ᵒᶠ ᵗʰᵉ ᶦᶜᵉ ᶜʳᵉᵃᵐ ᵈᶦᵐᵉⁿˢᶦᵒⁿ 🎉🧁
Lizzlepants 🐒 @lizzlepants.bsky.social · 29/09/2026
I drew my WAP for you pls respond
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Reposted by muffin oracle🔮🍦ʰᶦᵍʰ ᵖʳᶦᵉˢᵗᵉˢˢ ᵒᶠ ᵗʰᵉ ᶦᶜᵉ ᶜʳᵉᵃᵐ ᵈᶦᵐᵉⁿˢᶦᵒⁿ 🎉🧁
Lizzy @stonedeva.bsky.social · 29/09/2026
On Tuesdays, we flounce.
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Reposted by muffin oracle🔮🍦ʰᶦᵍʰ ᵖʳᶦᵉˢᵗᵉˢˢ ᵒᶠ ᵗʰᵉ ᶦᶜᵉ ᶜʳᵉᵃᵐ ᵈᶦᵐᵉⁿˢᶦᵒⁿ 🎉🧁
the corghoul from cowboy beBOO! 👻 @realqrampage.fightins.online · 29/09/2026
it’s a magical day in corporate (multiple people have replied all to a message that errantly cc’d a huge distro list, and all of them say “STOP REPLYING ALL”)
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Reposted by muffin oracle🔮🍦ʰᶦᵍʰ ᵖʳᶦᵉˢᵗᵉˢˢ ᵒᶠ ᵗʰᵉ ᶦᶜᵉ ᶜʳᵉᵃᵐ ᵈᶦᵐᵉⁿˢᶦᵒⁿ 🎉🧁
dissected @trepanation.bsky.social · 29/09/2026
pic of a small dog where the snout has been modified to look like it’s very small. big eyes. dog is green and has antennae
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muffin oracle🔮🍦ʰᶦᵍʰ ᵖʳᶦᵉˢᵗᵉˢˢ ᵒᶠ ᵗʰᵉ ᶦᶜᵉ ᶜʳᵉᵃᵐ ᵈᶦᵐᵉⁿˢᶦᵒⁿ 🎉🧁 @snappleroan.bsky.social · 29/09/2026
a halloween adéla cover called "the baddest witches ain't in MA"
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Reposted by muffin oracle🔮🍦ʰᶦᵍʰ ᵖʳᶦᵉˢᵗᵉˢˢ ᵒᶠ ᵗʰᵉ ᶦᶜᵉ ᶜʳᵉᵃᵐ ᵈᶦᵐᵉⁿˢᶦᵒⁿ 🎉🧁
☢️ Captain Antagonist ☢️ @captantagonist.bsky.social · 28/09/2026
Astral projecting myself to next weekend already
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Reposted by muffin oracle🔮🍦ʰᶦᵍʰ ᵖʳᶦᵉˢᵗᵉˢˢ ᵒᶠ ᵗʰᵉ ᶦᶜᵉ ᶜʳᵉᵃᵐ ᵈᶦᵐᵉⁿˢᶦᵒⁿ 🎉🧁
Gef the Toking Mongoose @geftokingmongoose.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
What I picture when people say escrow
The cool S design people used to draw in school with crow wings
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muffin oracle🔮🍦ʰᶦᵍʰ ᵖʳᶦᵉˢᵗᵉˢˢ ᵒᶠ ᵗʰᵉ ᶦᶜᵉ ᶜʳᵉᵃᵐ ᵈᶦᵐᵉⁿˢᶦᵒⁿ 🎉🧁 @snappleroan.bsky.social · 28/09/2026
don't threaten me with a good time 🖤
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Reposted by muffin oracle🔮🍦ʰᶦᵍʰ ᵖʳᶦᵉˢᵗᵉˢˢ ᵒᶠ ᵗʰᵉ ᶦᶜᵉ ᶜʳᵉᵃᵐ ᵈᶦᵐᵉⁿˢᶦᵒⁿ 🎉🧁
my ordinary life @calne.ca · 27/09/2026
im very busy
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Reposted by muffin oracle🔮🍦ʰᶦᵍʰ ᵖʳᶦᵉˢᵗᵉˢˢ ᵒᶠ ᵗʰᵉ ᶦᶜᵉ ᶜʳᵉᵃᵐ ᵈᶦᵐᵉⁿˢᶦᵒⁿ 🎉🧁
Braden Serkas @portmanteauface.bsky.social · 28/09/2026
Showing up to a job interview with a fully functional starbucks airport kiosk
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Reposted by muffin oracle🔮🍦ʰᶦᵍʰ ᵖʳᶦᵉˢᵗᵉˢˢ ᵒᶠ ᵗʰᵉ ᶦᶜᵉ ᶜʳᵉᵃᵐ ᵈᶦᵐᵉⁿˢᶦᵒⁿ 🎉🧁
brick @bigblocks.bsky.social · 28/09/2026
boring: touch grass soaring: babe go look at the sky
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Reposted by muffin oracle🔮🍦ʰᶦᵍʰ ᵖʳᶦᵉˢᵗᵉˢˢ ᵒᶠ ᵗʰᵉ ᶦᶜᵉ ᶜʳᵉᵃᵐ ᵈᶦᵐᵉⁿˢᶦᵒⁿ 🎉🧁
Jerry Chen @jcsalterego.bsky.social · 25/09/2026
wow
a graphic that reads:

The New York Times
The 100 Best Posters of the 21st Century

Ranked #1: The person reading this 🥹
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Reposted by muffin oracle🔮🍦ʰᶦᵍʰ ᵖʳᶦᵉˢᵗᵉˢˢ ᵒᶠ ᵗʰᵉ ᶦᶜᵉ ᶜʳᵉᵃᵐ ᵈᶦᵐᵉⁿˢᶦᵒⁿ 🎉🧁
(spoo)key @lefttwix.com · 24/09/2026
AITA? my roommate (4 month old F) just shit herself then just sat there in it & smiled at me (30’s F) instead of cleaning herself. when i went to help her clean it, she cried & screamed at me. i assumed she didn’t want to sleep with shit in her pants so i thought i was helping but am i the asshole?
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Reposted by muffin oracle🔮🍦ʰᶦᵍʰ ᵖʳᶦᵉˢᵗᵉˢˢ ᵒᶠ ᵗʰᵉ ᶦᶜᵉ ᶜʳᵉᵃᵐ ᵈᶦᵐᵉⁿˢᶦᵒⁿ 🎉🧁
Paused Mortem 💀 @pausedmortem.bsky.social · 25/09/2026
No whimsy up in this fucking bitch.
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Reposted by muffin oracle🔮🍦ʰᶦᵍʰ ᵖʳᶦᵉˢᵗᵉˢˢ ᵒᶠ ᵗʰᵉ ᶦᶜᵉ ᶜʳᵉᵃᵐ ᵈᶦᵐᵉⁿˢᶦᵒⁿ 🎉🧁
Jamie Smart @jamiesmart.bsky.social · 25/09/2026
Can’t eat a sandwich until you subscribe to sandwiches. Can’t eat today’s sandwich until it has applied daily sandwich updates. Sandwich now has adverts even though you paid for ad-free sandwich. Can pay again to have less sandwich adverts. Now you can eat the sandwich, but it’s smaller.
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Reposted by muffin oracle🔮🍦ʰᶦᵍʰ ᵖʳᶦᵉˢᵗᵉˢˢ ᵒᶠ ᵗʰᵉ ᶦᶜᵉ ᶜʳᵉᵃᵐ ᵈᶦᵐᵉⁿˢᶦᵒⁿ 🎉🧁
Maybe It Will Happen Today @today-maybe.bsky.social · 25/09/2026
A digital illustration of a version of the big board from Wheel of Fortune. An array of green rectangles (each bearing an icon of a hand with crossed fingers inside a circle with rays), and white rectangles that indicate the letters in the secret phrase contestants are trying to guess. The board is not yet solved and reads like this:

M_YB_ I_
_ILL H_PP_N
__D_Y

Standing next to the board in a shiny pink and maroon evening gown and ready to turn around newly-guessed letters is a woman whose head is a human hand with crossed fingers. 

Below the board in the space where viewers at home are informed what type of  phrase is in play it simply reads ‘PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE’
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Reposted by muffin oracle🔮🍦ʰᶦᵍʰ ᵖʳᶦᵉˢᵗᵉˢˢ ᵒᶠ ᵗʰᵉ ᶦᶜᵉ ᶜʳᵉᵃᵐ ᵈᶦᵐᵉⁿˢᶦᵒⁿ 🎉🧁
Opinion Editor @ Bluesky @dly.bsky.social · 24/09/2026
love being in my late-30s bc what do you mean I’m bringing a piece of my banana bread to the bar for my friend?
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Reposted by muffin oracle🔮🍦ʰᶦᵍʰ ᵖʳᶦᵉˢᵗᵉˢˢ ᵒᶠ ᵗʰᵉ ᶦᶜᵉ ᶜʳᵉᵃᵐ ᵈᶦᵐᵉⁿˢᶦᵒⁿ 🎉🧁
Kururun! @kururun.bsky.social · 24/09/2026
'Epstein had Covid made to weaken the Irish' is such a beautiful take. You can't come up with stuff like that unless you're genuinely deranged. You hardly ever see posting this good anymore. As an Irish person myself I'm grateful for this.
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Reposted by muffin oracle🔮🍦ʰᶦᵍʰ ᵖʳᶦᵉˢᵗᵉˢˢ ᵒᶠ ᵗʰᵉ ᶦᶜᵉ ᶜʳᵉᵃᵐ ᵈᶦᵐᵉⁿˢᶦᵒⁿ 🎉🧁
𝑏𝑎𝑠𝑡𝑖𝑙𝑙𝑒 𝑚𝑎𝑔𝑛𝑜𝑙𝑖𝑎𝑠 @petestaiano.com · 24/09/2026
I want a girl with a short skirt and a looooooooooooooooooooooong Hijab inspired secular accessorization
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Reposted by muffin oracle🔮🍦ʰᶦᵍʰ ᵖʳᶦᵉˢᵗᵉˢˢ ᵒᶠ ᵗʰᵉ ᶦᶜᵉ ᶜʳᵉᵃᵐ ᵈᶦᵐᵉⁿˢᶦᵒⁿ 🎉🧁
𝙱𝚊𝚋𝚎 𝚁𝚞𝚝𝚑𝚕𝚎𝚜𝚜 @unfitz.bsky.social · 23/09/2026
[Thom Yorke from Radiohead in a diner] I’ll have today’s special ˢᵒ ᶠᵘᶜᵏᵉⁿ ˢᵖᵉᶜⁱᵃˡ
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Reposted by muffin oracle🔮🍦ʰᶦᵍʰ ᵖʳᶦᵉˢᵗᵉˢˢ ᵒᶠ ᵗʰᵉ ᶦᶜᵉ ᶜʳᵉᵃᵐ ᵈᶦᵐᵉⁿˢᶦᵒⁿ 🎉🧁
En Buen Ora @enbuenora.bsky.social · 23/09/2026
good point, why has Western medicine steadfastly refused to embrace the potential of magic
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Reposted by muffin oracle🔮🍦ʰᶦᵍʰ ᵖʳᶦᵉˢᵗᵉˢˢ ᵒᶠ ᵗʰᵉ ᶦᶜᵉ ᶜʳᵉᵃᵐ ᵈᶦᵐᵉⁿˢᶦᵒⁿ 🎉🧁
TwoSense @twosense.bsky.social · 22/09/2026
slipping into something more comfortable (a tub of what I can’t believe isn’t butter)
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muffin oracle🔮🍦ʰᶦᵍʰ ᵖʳᶦᵉˢᵗᵉˢˢ ᵒᶠ ᵗʰᵉ ᶦᶜᵉ ᶜʳᵉᵃᵐ ᵈᶦᵐᵉⁿˢᶦᵒⁿ 🎉🧁 @snappleroan.bsky.social · 22/09/2026
you used to call me on my shellphone
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Reposted by muffin oracle🔮🍦ʰᶦᵍʰ ᵖʳᶦᵉˢᵗᵉˢˢ ᵒᶠ ᵗʰᵉ ᶦᶜᵉ ᶜʳᵉᵃᵐ ᵈᶦᵐᵉⁿˢᶦᵒⁿ 🎉🧁
cait (and adonis) @cait.bsky.social · 22/09/2026
trying to build a world-destroying superintelligence but shaking my head the whole time so you know I don't agree with it
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Reposted by muffin oracle🔮🍦ʰᶦᵍʰ ᵖʳᶦᵉˢᵗᵉˢˢ ᵒᶠ ᵗʰᵉ ᶦᶜᵉ ᶜʳᵉᵃᵐ ᵈᶦᵐᵉⁿˢᶦᵒⁿ 🎉🧁
Timmy Boy @tcinternets.com · 22/09/2026
h00tn h011rin
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Reposted by muffin oracle🔮🍦ʰᶦᵍʰ ᵖʳᶦᵉˢᵗᵉˢˢ ᵒᶠ ᵗʰᵉ ᶦᶜᵉ ᶜʳᵉᵃᵐ ᵈᶦᵐᵉⁿˢᶦᵒⁿ 🎉🧁
dan mentos @danmentos.com · 22/09/2026
[job interview] interviewer: so god killed all your kids? job: that's right
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Reposted by muffin oracle🔮🍦ʰᶦᵍʰ ᵖʳᶦᵉˢᵗᵉˢˢ ᵒᶠ ᵗʰᵉ ᶦᶜᵉ ᶜʳᵉᵃᵐ ᵈᶦᵐᵉⁿˢᶦᵒⁿ 🎉🧁
Tyler, from the Internet (Haunted) @tylerfromtheinternet.com · 21/09/2026
you wouldn't download a car meme generator:

you wouldn't eat a fucking baby
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Reposted by muffin oracle🔮🍦ʰᶦᵍʰ ᵖʳᶦᵉˢᵗᵉˢˢ ᵒᶠ ᵗʰᵉ ᶦᶜᵉ ᶜʳᵉᵃᵐ ᵈᶦᵐᵉⁿˢᶦᵒⁿ 🎉🧁
Blair Spookily @blairloudly.bsky.social · 21/09/2026
slipping into something more comfortable (a new dimension)
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muffin oracle🔮🍦ʰᶦᵍʰ ᵖʳᶦᵉˢᵗᵉˢˢ ᵒᶠ ᵗʰᵉ ᶦᶜᵉ ᶜʳᵉᵃᵐ ᵈᶦᵐᵉⁿˢᶦᵒⁿ 🎉🧁 @snappleroan.bsky.social · 22/09/2026
38 reasons why
095
Reposted by muffin oracle🔮🍦ʰᶦᵍʰ ᵖʳᶦᵉˢᵗᵉˢˢ ᵒᶠ ᵗʰᵉ ᶦᶜᵉ ᶜʳᵉᵃᵐ ᵈᶦᵐᵉⁿˢᶦᵒⁿ 🎉🧁
Alex Goldman @agoldman.bsky.social · 17/09/2026
What is playing
3235
Reposted by muffin oracle🔮🍦ʰᶦᵍʰ ᵖʳᶦᵉˢᵗᵉˢˢ ᵒᶠ ᵗʰᵉ ᶦᶜᵉ ᶜʳᵉᵃᵐ ᵈᶦᵐᵉⁿˢᶦᵒⁿ 🎉🧁
𝙱𝚊𝚋𝚎 𝚁𝚞𝚝𝚑𝚕𝚎𝚜𝚜 @unfitz.bsky.social · 21/09/2026
Me: I just need one pill. Not 10. Not half the bottle. Just one. Pill bottle: Oh. So like, one in a pillion?
25316
Reposted by muffin oracle🔮🍦ʰᶦᵍʰ ᵖʳᶦᵉˢᵗᵉˢˢ ᵒᶠ ᵗʰᵉ ᶦᶜᵉ ᶜʳᵉᵃᵐ ᵈᶦᵐᵉⁿˢᶦᵒⁿ 🎉🧁
Braden Serkas @portmanteauface.bsky.social · 20/09/2026
[something good happens] ME: *already planning for the worst possible outcome* this is bullshit
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