Reposted by russellBoochy's Boospectboo @frenchys-goldau.bsky.social · 27/07/2026Terrifying if literal: dream job 816159
russell @russbhere.bsky.social · 27/07/2026this bottle has two modes: 1- zero ketchup 2- fire hose 110
Reposted by russellDaddyJew @daddyjew.bsky.social · 18/03/2025If Lady Gaga joined the Goo Goo Dolls they’d be the Goo Goo Gaga’s 011730
Reposted by russell🅱️oofessor Killosk 👻🔪 @professorkiosk.wtf · 19/07/2026this antacid isn’t working I am still trippin balls 624358
russell @russbhere.bsky.social · 17/07/2026if rock, paper and scissors teamed up they would be unstoppable 010
russell @russbhere.bsky.social · 16/07/2026got my lab results back and turns out i’m deficient in vitamin d and will to live 2130
Reposted by russellPAM! @pamtoo.bsky.social · 20/04/2025Trying to teach this spiral ham to go down the stairs like a slinky 5553136
Reposted by russellForrest Plump @nahyoudoit.bsky.social · 04/07/2026Prescription-strength back scratches 610236
Reposted by russellForrest Plump @nahyoudoit.bsky.social · 29/06/2026Pearl Jam puns? It doesn’t get Eddie Vedder than that. 27500122
Reposted by russellSantana Abraxas @slime-golem.biz · 13/07/2026being hunted by the beautiful genius killer 0385
Reposted by russellan evan @elsplice.bsky.social · 13/07/2026here's a couple of gnomes hiding behind a fence 38626
russell @russbhere.bsky.social · 13/07/2026i used to ponder the thought “what if arrangements were edible” and then like a bolt of fucking lightning 011
Reposted by russellCorduroy Cheddar @corduroycheddar.bsky.social · 12/07/2026More animals should be bumble, not just bees 15559152
Reposted by russellsweetie π @sixfeetofcandy.bsky.social · 11/07/2026everywhere i go people my age are getting old and it’s killing the vibe 932676
Reposted by russellDamnit Janet @damnitjanet.bsky.social · 31/05/2025The noise you make when you get into the bath is just demons fleeing your body 624687
Reposted by russell✧𝔰𝔭𝔬𝔬𝔨𝔶 𝔪𝔲𝔡 𝔰𝔠𝔞𝔪𝔭✧ @altaudge.bsky.social · 27/02/2025it’s like, i want the country road to take me home and i’d love to be in a place where i belong, but is that really west virginia? 1342252283
Reposted by russell✧𝔰𝔭𝔬𝔬𝔨𝔶 𝔪𝔲𝔡 𝔰𝔠𝔞𝔪𝔭✧ @altaudge.bsky.social · 10/07/2026please be patient with me, i wasn’t listening 12903190
russell @russbhere.bsky.social · 10/07/2026“yeah but at what cost” —me anytime someone says something positive 010
Reposted by russellFᎪᎢ ᏩᎪNᎠᎪᏞF @sofarrsogud.bsky.social · 08/07/2026Mispronouncing the number after 39 is my forte. 324872
Reposted by russellDropped Mike @rebrafsim.bsky.social · 08/01/2025me: don’t mind me, I’m just taking a gander petting zoo employee: please put the goose down 7540125
Reposted by russellDiedrich Bader @diedrichbader.bsky.social · 07/07/2026Well, we may have lost but at least we look like we cheated 157121161400
Reposted by russellNate's Myth @natesmith.dev · 07/07/2026me waiting patiently to tell the flight attendant which little snack I want 347570
Reposted by russell🅱️oofessor Killosk 👻🔪 @professorkiosk.wtf · 06/07/2026does anyone know how to log off 3624069
russell @russbhere.bsky.social · 06/07/2026we hold these truths to be self evident, that brown sugar cinnamon is the best pop tart 051
Reposted by russellFrovo @frovo.bsky.social · 20/03/2025KID: hey mister can i pet your dog? ME: sure kid KID: what kind is he? ME: that there's a pure beef vienna son careful don't get mustard on your shirt 447184
Reposted by russellPessimus Prime @pessimusprime.bsky.social · 04/07/2026250 years since Will Smith killed all them aliens 520648
Reposted by russellSkellyton 🦇 @infinitefinite.blog · 03/07/2026 🕯️ 🕯️ 🕯️ funniest 🕯️ 4th of July 🕯️ ever 🕯️ 🕯️ 🕯️ 05015
russell @russbhere.bsky.social · 04/07/2026this the kind of shi that PMO. why would you take the mouth off the shark 010
Reposted by russellMelicious @honeybadgermel.bsky.social · 02/07/2026Sometimes we have to remind ourselves to forget. 011055
Reposted by russellBob Heller @bobheller.bsky.social · 30/11/2024ME (taking hit): What's the best age to tell your son you smoke a shit ton of weed? SON: Um, I guess it's 7, Dad. 15113
russell @russbhere.bsky.social · 02/07/2026opening overpriced pokemon packs just to feel something 041
Reposted by russellGreg the Miller @gregthemiller.bsky.social · 27/06/2026that’s not very right about now of you, funk soul brother 181447378
Reposted by russellThe Real Kim Shady @kimmysunshine.bsky.social · 24/06/2026Do not interrupt me while I’m breaking generational curses 311445
Reposted by russellBlair Loudly @blairloudly.bsky.social · 08/10/2025everything is a joke but nothing is funny anymore 11587193
Reposted by russellYgrene @ygrene.bsky.social · 22/06/2026seeing a lot of dad’s marked down 50% at the store this morning 17842162
Reposted by russellMal @hallowedverses.bsky.social · 22/06/2026I gave up, but in a hot, mysterious way 315155
Reposted by russellGreg the Miller @gregthemiller.bsky.social · 18/06/2026what if we just learned to grow our own RAM 1820665
Reposted by russellUffdafuckingda @uffdada.bsky.social · 19/06/2026I’m getting to that age where I feel like I’m about to fall for an online scam. 612948
russell @russbhere.bsky.social · 18/06/2026me: stop saying “unalive” on social media posts. i can’t take it anymore them: shmurder 000
Reposted by russellBlair Loudly @blairloudly.bsky.social · 16/06/2026teach a man to fish and he will terrorize the ocean 316567
Reposted by russellUncle Duke @uncleduke1969.bsky.social · 17/06/2026MacGyver finally realized that he just might be overthinking things a bit. 2032067
Reposted by russellLizzy @stonedeva.bsky.social · 09/06/2026Telling my kid she can't leave me to go back to school bc how will I know which ads are AI 518252
Reposted by russellcrabbydaddy dave @crabbydaddy.bsky.social · 17/06/2026everything is a mystery if you’re dumb enough 420680
Reposted by russellkim @kimmymonte.bsky.social · 17/06/2026if i opened a male strip club for anxious people i’d call it “Panic! At The Dick Show” 310915
