kim @kimmymonte.bsky.social · 30/09/2026{me watching a fight at a hockey game} i think they’re just pissed off bc the floor is so slippery. 0537
Reposted by kimthepokeuk.bsky.social @thepokeuk.bsky.social · 30/09/202625 of the Funniest Posts We’ve Seen on Bluesky This Week www.thepoke.com/2026/09/30/2... 69114
kim @kimmymonte.bsky.social · 30/09/2026true story: i once dated a professional hockey player from Sweden and one night he called me and asked “you up?” so i drove over excited and when i got there he asked me if i could balance his checkbook. 1330
Reposted by kimkim @kimmymonte.bsky.social · 28/09/2026in the song Mr. Brightside, are they saying “jealousy” or “jell-o sea”? it’s hard to tell. 3455
kim @kimmymonte.bsky.social · 28/09/2026in the song Mr. Brightside, are they saying “jealousy” or “jell-o sea”? it’s hard to tell. 3455
kim @kimmymonte.bsky.social · 26/09/2026hi. my cousin who is also my best friend is unfortunately going through chemo right now. she’s only 38. if anyone has experience w a loved one or personally, was wondering what is something good to send her? something that helps or that she would need going through this hell. thank u love u guys ❤️ 8201
kim @kimmymonte.bsky.social · 25/09/2026trader joe’s can literally package anything and people will buy it. pickle flavored pancake mix? it’s a fall favorite. pumpkin anchovies? sold out sorry. watermelon infused pork roast? great for your next bbq. elf cum hand lotion? perfect stocking stuffer 3427
kim @kimmymonte.bsky.social · 25/09/2026just saw the avengers: end game encore w the new ending and three new end credit scenes and i literally screamed in the theater like a toddler LFGGGGG 1111
kim @kimmymonte.bsky.social · 22/09/2026The pumpkin was invented in 1942 when a watermelon put on corduroys. 27315
kim @kimmymonte.bsky.social · 22/09/2026met the 12 ft home depot skeleton today. he’s much taller in person 1180
kim @kimmymonte.bsky.social · 18/09/2026me watching josh allen who i’ve never met once run down the field: omg joshy buddy be careful 1181
kim @kimmymonte.bsky.social · 13/09/2026when you’re in a heated argument via text a real power move is to like all your own messages right after you send them. 1537
Reposted by kimTravis comma bitch @prof-hinkley.bsky.social · 12/04/2025*introducing a friend to Paul Simon* Paul Simon: hi, I'm Al Me: goddamnit Paul Simon 510315
Reposted by kimViktor Winetrout @viktorwinetrout.bsky.social · 08/09/2026More than anything, Jaws is a metaphor about the dangers of being attacked by a killer shark 28972149
Reposted by kimandy vs. @im-all-id.me · 01/09/2026The best cure for a crush is to simply get to know the person 612529326
kim @kimmymonte.bsky.social · 28/08/2026someone posted on twitter that canadian geese will now be called donald ducks and i haven’t stopped laughing since. 07121
kim @kimmymonte.bsky.social · 27/08/2026someone said the grim reaper is like a male instacart grocery shopper and gdi this is the best analogy ever. 0419
kim @kimmymonte.bsky.social · 25/08/2026feeling sad? same. lets fix that. here’s my best friend. 1272
kim @kimmymonte.bsky.social · 24/08/2026great. i live paycheck to paycheck and i currently don’t have healthcare 1404
Reposted by kimdarth™️ @darthbluesky.bsky.social · 22/08/2026is the great healthcare plan in the room with us right now 1152122223
kim @kimmymonte.bsky.social · 19/08/2026how did johnson and johnson decide whose name would go first? 10363
kim @kimmymonte.bsky.social · 19/08/2026healthcare is so stupid like just make me feel better for free, bro, i like being alive 27513
kim @kimmymonte.bsky.social · 18/08/2026every day, life leads me closer to *God * an Onlyfans account 1291
kim @kimmymonte.bsky.social · 17/08/2026when i leave a party i hate saying goodbye to everyone so i’ll usually just leave quietly and start a new life in another country. 1404
Reposted by kimYgrene @ygrene.bsky.social · 14/08/2026me: (asking for help) please get away from me 322564
kim @kimmymonte.bsky.social · 15/08/2026noticed you texted me "thanks" instead of "thanks!" where is this hostility coming from 217641
kim @kimmymonte.bsky.social · 14/08/2026my husband sends me pics every day of my pug waiting by the door while i’m at work so i guess my only option is to quit my job 😭 2340
kim @kimmymonte.bsky.social · 11/08/2026blink-182 was invented in 1992 when someone spilled a cup of apple juice on a pair of Vans. 4464
Reposted by kimDan of the Year @downwithdan.bsky.social · 11/08/2026I don't like the narrative being formed here 272803367
kim @kimmymonte.bsky.social · 07/08/2026the dumbest phrase in the english language is “starter home” wtf are you even talking about 46210
Reposted by kimJason, ex Inferis @benedictsred.bsky.social · 07/08/2026Crustacean soothsayers tell crawtionary tales 813453
kim @kimmymonte.bsky.social · 31/07/2026met a guy at work today named John Fruit IV which means there were 3 John Fruits before him and i find that absolutely fascinating. 9499
kim @kimmymonte.bsky.social · 27/07/2026what do you think the big halloween costume is going to be this year? i think maybe andrew tate being arrested in his brand new ann taylor loft outfit 2391
Reposted by kimborn miserable @bornmiserable.bsky.social · 24/07/2026another drawing from my Twitter archive, this one based on a tweet by @kimmymonte.bsky.social I HAVE SPOKEN 1509
kim @kimmymonte.bsky.social · 21/07/2026doomsday trailer killed me don’t talk to me until december 1110
kim @kimmymonte.bsky.social · 20/07/2026Titanic: 👦👱👏🎫⛵⚓ 👩👒👨👜👝⛵⚓ 🎩👑👹👺 ✨🌟👩🌊👱💕 👩👱😀💃💑👯 🚬💰👨👮🌌🔫 👱👩💎🚪✏📒 👩👱💕💕🚙 👨👮🔫💵⌚ 🌊🌊😱😫😖🌊🌊 🚣🚣👧👶👧👶🚣🚣 👩🚪👱🌊🌊🙍💕😘😲😭🌊 👵💎🌊 4364
kim @kimmymonte.bsky.social · 19/07/2026make a musician/band’s name better. i’ll go first: Green Year 56612
kim @kimmymonte.bsky.social · 19/07/2026PSA: do not spend a few hundred on your hair at the salon the same day there’s a monsoon, tornado, flash flood, apocalypse warning in your area. 4290
