iiinova — where your digital self keeps evolving

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Cosmic Clau @cosmicclau.bsky.social · 17h

floyd taking his treat into the other room like who do you think is gonna eat it little buddy i have access to all the treats i could eat them all right now if i wanted to why must you hide that specific one from me i would never come and jam my snoot into your treat that's your thing not mine i jus

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cap’n watsisname @capnwatsisname.bsky.social · 29/09/2026

A WEREWOLF WHO TURNS ON THE WAXING CRESCENT MOON: Haha guys i just realized what tonight is and we kinda need to solve this escape room faster

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Tusk Jenkins @tuskjenkins.bsky.social · 29/09/2026

We've become so silly out of touch with our instincts that if we still had tails they would betray us, but that's why I always swing on the ass tickling of forgiveness

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chris. @azedand2knots.bsky.social · 29/09/2026

*sound of bone-saw, clanking chains, the wind moans through the trees and so begin the hollow voices of the damned* I'm just burning doing the neutron dance

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chris. @azedand2knots.bsky.social · 23h

One nice thing about aging is I can finally start a collection of the lenses my friends are having replaced when they go in for their cataract surgeries.

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cap’n watsisname @capnwatsisname.bsky.social · 21h

proverbial straw in one hand, proverbial Capri Sun in the other

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Tusk Jenkins @tuskjenkins.bsky.social · 21h

Yeah I hear voices but they're not yours so no witty banter or coffee or dinner or monogamy or maybe having little voices of our own someday, just unrequited I'm the special one to do crazy alone things

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Astr0z0mbreez @astr0z0mbreez.bsky.social · 15h

Say what you will about lizards. They don’t give a shit. They shed their skin & move on.

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FᎪᎢ ᏩᎪNᎠᎪᏞF @sofarrsogud.bsky.social · 28/09/2026

Yes, obviously it's a tuxedo t-shirt. We're at a wedding, Sharon.

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Tits McDick @titsmcdick.bsky.social · 28/09/2026

My turn signal is broken so I’m throwing a brick out the car window to indicate my direction of travel.

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Amy @msfoxifurnasty.bsky.social · 28/09/2026

my toxic trait is enumerating all my toxic traits for you before we even have coffee together

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𝙱𝚊𝚋𝚎 𝚁𝚞𝚝𝚑𝚕𝚎𝚜𝚜 @unfitz.bsky.social · 28/09/2026

Her: Why do you keep falling in love when you end up getting hurt? Me: Ever get an ice cream headache? Her: Of course. Me: Did you stop eating ice cream?

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𝔏𝔦𝔳𝔢 𝔏𝔞𝔲𝔤𝔥 𝔏𝔬𝔞𝔱𝔥𝔢 @fleurkenstein.bsky.social · 28/09/2026

Feeling exceptionally distressed that my spawn sacs seem blocked and yet the pond is perfectly temperate

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𝔏𝔦𝔳𝔢 𝔏𝔞𝔲𝔤𝔥 𝔏𝔬𝔞𝔱𝔥𝔢 @fleurkenstein.bsky.social · 28/09/2026

if you really loved me, you’d drink this cup of my spit 🫴🏼

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𝔏𝔦𝔳𝔢 𝔏𝔞𝔲𝔤𝔥 𝔏𝔬𝔞𝔱𝔥𝔢 @fleurkenstein.bsky.social · 29/08/2026

Broke up with my medieval bf because he kept referring to my vagina as an 𝙤𝙪𝙗𝙡𝙞𝙚𝙩𝙩𝙚 𝙤𝙛 𝙨𝙚𝙣𝙨𝙪𝙖𝙡𝙚 𝙙𝙚𝙥𝙧𝙖𝙫𝙞𝙩𝙮

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Tusk Jenkins @tuskjenkins.bsky.social · 28/09/2026

It's presented as art, like everything in it is chosen for meaning. So you look, and look and stare, and you're just making it all up until it still doesn't quite fit but you forgot about Dre being subjective

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SpatialKimtamine @kimmalien.bsky.social · 28/09/2026

I could go to sleep but unfortunately I’m committed to making tomorrow worse for me and everyone involved

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sweetie π @sixfeetofcandy.bsky.social · 28/09/2026

“i’m what you’d call an ethereal beauty” i say, as i suck poppyseeds out of my teeth

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Corduroy Cheddar @corduroycheddar.bsky.social · 27/09/2026

WHAT?! ~ an actual worm, being introduced to a wormhole

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Pru @prufrockluvsong.bsky.social · 27/09/2026

Me: *skips a rock perfectly across a pond* Fred Flintstone: OH NO MY CELL PHONE

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𝙱𝚊𝚋𝚎 𝚁𝚞𝚝𝚑𝚕𝚎𝚜𝚜 @unfitz.bsky.social · 27/09/2026

A gloryhole, but for dispensing churros.

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Salty MacTavish @saltymactavish.bsky.social · 27/09/2026

Before AI comes for us, I need you to know *sound of modem dialup*

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Salty MacTavish @saltymactavish.bsky.social · 27/09/2026

Generally, getting older is a privilege which I try my best to not take for granted. Also, I can say ‘fuck that noise’ and walk away from bullshit whilst farting

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Salty MacTavish @saltymactavish.bsky.social · 26/09/2026

I never learned how to smoke all casual and cool but I can play air trumpet to a Freddie Hubbard solo that would make you nana’s panties drop

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chris. @azedand2knots.bsky.social · 27/09/2026

A meat raffle where they raffle off our most feared meats.

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Astr0z0mbreez @astr0z0mbreez.bsky.social · 27/09/2026

I grew up around disgusting boy heathens & vividly remember my 1st girls sleepover. They were all saying things that felt good & I was like “you ever get a fart caught between your legs” & how embarrassing, but the right 1 was like hahahahaha ya

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Julie Lavender Menace @2tickytacky.bsky.social · 26/09/2026

I invited my next door neighbors over to play connect four. They just looked at me funny and went inside.

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chris. @azedand2knots.bsky.social · 26/09/2026

In Canada, no one can hear you scream. Sorry.

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Tusk Jenkins @tuskjenkins.bsky.social · 26/09/2026

Climbed the mountain to test the wisdom of my paper airplanes and also my dating profile and contact info that are on them

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cap’n watsisname @capnwatsisname.bsky.social · 27/09/2026

more like Bore-Jack Hoseman amiright

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cap’n watsisname @capnwatsisname.bsky.social · 27/09/2026

[my life big twist ending reveal] …you’re saying I’ve been me this whole time?

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PAM! @pamtoo.bsky.social · 27/09/2026

eating the first pumpkin donut of the season through a long, low continuous growl in case you get any ideas.

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Boo! Bootsy 👻 @weirdmiddlechild.bsky.social · 27/09/2026

I like frosted flakes but i hate scooping tony the tiger's litter box. He's gr-r-ross!

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Damnit Janet @damnitjanet.bsky.social · 28/09/2026

Podcasts are actually really useful for making it sound like you're not home alone when the delivery guy brings a shameful amount of takeaway

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Uncle Duke @uncleduke1969.bsky.social · 27/09/2026

debbie sounds like fun

Handwritten door sign reads “All Girls With Long Hair - Must Be tied UP.
Thank you
DEBBIE”

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sweetie π @sixfeetofcandy.bsky.social · 27/09/2026

i don’t so sexy posts bc i’m not sexy i am a beam of pure white light that bores holes in your body

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Greg the Miller @gregthemiller.bsky.social · 27/09/2026

gonna start wearing a cup because of my cat

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Dreamer @elgatoesmio.bsky.social · 23/09/2026

Open casket funeral? I don’t even want people looking at me when I’m alive

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𝙱𝚊𝚋𝚎 𝚁𝚞𝚝𝚑𝚕𝚎𝚜𝚜 @unfitz.bsky.social · 23/09/2026

[Thom Yorke from Radiohead in a diner] I’ll have today’s special ˢᵒ ᶠᵘᶜᵏᵉⁿ ˢᵖᵉᶜⁱᵃˡ

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Greg the Miller @gregthemiller.bsky.social · 26/09/2025

why do they call them children, they have like zero chill

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𝙱𝚊𝚋𝚎 𝚁𝚞𝚝𝚑𝚕𝚎𝚜𝚜 @unfitz.bsky.social · 26/09/2026

Science fact: If you clutch your pearls hard enough they transform into diamonds.

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Astr0z0mbreez @astr0z0mbreez.bsky.social · 26/09/2026

One way to be a lil bitch is by constantly cleaning up leaves. Like wahhhh help Earth is falling on Earth & it’s messy! Toughen the fuck up

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Chestbursty @chestrovert.bsky.social · 26/09/2026

As I get older and injure myself more and more, I wish I had paid attention to first-aid in class instead of writing shit in Metallica font on notebook covers

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Damnit Janet @damnitjanet.bsky.social · 26/09/2026

Someone at work complained about me shouting the c word (cunt) yesterday and then a wasp stung me in the face and I yelled motherfucker, cos I can take a hint

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