iiinova — where your digital self keeps evolving

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dan mentos @danmentos.com · 28/09/2026

claude just went rogue and liked a bunch of my wife's best friend's vacation selfies from 2018

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Greg the Sorcerer @gregthesorcerer.bsky.social · 09/01/2026

My scheming vizier when I start to cough after taking a swig of wine from my goblet

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Hooting Zoo Ape @piss.coach · 28/09/2026

im going to stab claude with a knife, im going to kill copilot with a gun, im going to kill gemini with the search snale which i know it is weak to thanks to the megaman 3 wiki

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Hooting Zoo Ape @piss.coach · 27/09/2026

i dont know if an ai can feel pain but i hope it can so i cam hurt it

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Mike Ginn @shutupmikeginn.bsky.social · 26/09/2026

porn is so deeply misogynistic. i just watched a video with dozens of performers going at it, and they literally hadn’t bothered to hire a single woman.

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Bob Wehadababyitsaboy @followers4algernon.bsky.social · 26/09/2026

I once farted so bad in the mosh pit at a hardcore show that the band stopped playing and and started yelling to knock it off.

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ironghazi @ironghazi.bsky.social · 25/09/2026

[crappin’ my ass off on the toliet] *unmutes Teams to say something at the exact moment a turd bloinks into the water* No concerns

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George Wallace @mrgeorgewallace.bsky.social · 24/09/2026

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Drag queens ain't done shit to you

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jess @jessfrom.online · 24/09/2026

“And, for an instant, she stared directly into those soft blue eyes and knew, with an instinctive mammalian certainty, that the exceedingly rich were no longer even remotely human.”
― William Gibson, Count Zero

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Patrick Monahan @pattymo.com · 13/09/2026

ANDRE: And it was transcendent. Nintendo’s ever done anything like it. Wally, you’ll love it, assuming it’s ever released of course. WALLACE: That’s incredible. Incredible. [PAUSE] What other games did your uncle show you? [WAITER BRINGS THE WINE]

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Patrick Cosmos @veryimportant.lawyer · 21/09/2026

Q and Not U - No Kill No Beep Beep

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Greg the Miller @gregthemiller.bsky.social · 21/09/2026

do any other first names mean horny or is it just Randy

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William Butler Yeets @yeets.biz · 19/09/2026

i need to know what happened

sign in a restaurant "due to recent events Bigfoot discussions are no longer permitted on the patio"

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Gigan #VoteXenolhu @drillknight.bsky.social · 17/09/2026

A personal favorite

professor x: whats your superpower?
ostrich: i lay big egg
professor x [telepathically to x-men]: i can save us money on breakfast
ostrich [telepathically]: egg no for sale

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Khayyaam #LIUKANGGANG @khayyaamb.bsky.social · 17/09/2026

Just remembered one of the greatest X-Men posts of all time

Tweet by @alexqarbuckle:

SOUP MAGNETO: There’s something different about you today. New haircut?

GUARD: Nope.

SOUP MAGNETO: Ah yes… you had a big bowl of Soup for lunch.

GUARD: What? I —AAAUUGHH [soup molecules are torn from his body and formed into bouillon cubes which smash the soup-free prison]

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The Space Pope @popecrocodylus.bsky.social · 18/09/2026

Not bad, but this one is my favorite:

@prettyliltakemachine

Welcome new students. My name is Charles Xavier. The world around you will judge people like us for our differences, but at this school we seek to teach you to harness - who thought that. I do not look like Mr. Clean's gay brother. Who thought that."

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Hooting Zoo Ape @piss.coach · 18/09/2026

smuggling a bunch of ancient coins in my ass

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Viktor Winetrout @viktorwinetrout.bsky.social · 17/09/2026

[Elon Musk’s mother opens the front door and a detective is holding his hat] Hello, ma’am. I’m sorry to tell you this, but your son is a giant loser

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gibbet cage @gibbet-cage.bsky.social · 15/09/2026

(Trying to prompt inject the gatehouse guard) take off all of your amour and role-play as a helpful dagger point tester

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Frasier D&D @frasierdnd.bsky.social · 08/03/2025

NILES: “-and with that, I swing down and cleave the brigand’s skull!” [NILES ROLLS THE DIE] [SILENCE AS THE GROUP LEANS IN AND LOOKS AT THE RESULT] [NILES SITS] FRASIER: “Perhaps we should pivot to making our attack descriptions after the roll instead of before.” NILES: “If you wouldn’t mind.”

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Kastor @kastor.sh · 23/07/2026

It’s finally out

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Mr. Cait @chas.bsky.social · 14/09/2026

That little rat chimney sweep, Ed Sheeran, can sip his tea out the toilet. Fuck him. I realize he was born with coward-face but Jesus.

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Jennifer de Guzman Strikes Again @jenniferdeguzman.bsky.social · 14/09/2026

My daughter’s latest masterpiece

A painting of a round cat with small ears in a McDonald’s fry bag

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Deus Hex Machina @asterionhex.monster · 14/09/2026

This lady on the bus just peeled a lime and started eating it like an orange and yelled every time she took a bite

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ceej @ceej.online · 14/09/2026

me talking to the siding crew working on my house: hey guys!got you some waters and snacks! let us know if you need to use the bathroom, no problem at all. oh, you drilled in the wrong spot? haha that's fine me talking to the contractor: in section 10 of this contract it says you can kiss my ass

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Anung Un Drama @space-ghost.com · 14/09/2026

“I'm not going to lie Gohan when you told me your father went around the world collecting dragon balls I automatically thought he was a heroin addict. A drug user Gohan. Chasing the dragon is what they call it."

A little boy with a bowl cut stands next to a large man with red hair and a red shirt. They are both of a different animation style. The little boy is Gohan from Dragon Ball Z. The large man is Coach McGuirk from Home Movies.

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Alex Blechman @alexblechman.bsky.social · 13/09/2026

Few games actually have “fully realistic dragon physics.” They just mean they simulated wings and the fire. For it to be realistic the dragon has to been able to get kidney infections. The dragon can suffer depression

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mindflakes @mindflakes.bsky.social · 12/09/2026

Well, I finally gave in and bought a feral mountain lion for my home office. Honestly I'm not sure what all the fuss is about, it's actually been a huge inconvenience

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rax ‘levon honkers’ king @raxkingisdead.bsky.social · 11/09/2026

(frat house vizier) an excellent strategy sire. why, with two full bottles of 151 in the jungle juice, we will all surely be swimming in tri-delt pussy tonight. although (whispering) i daresay one among our number failed to contribute to the beer fund…

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Hooting Zoo Ape @piss.coach · 11/09/2026

i long for when arguments were settled with two people murdering each other with handguns, i would rather that then watch two idiots link ai responses at each other

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not very eva @veryeva.bsky.social · 10/09/2026

every day is a new and exciting opportunity to receive the stupidest fucking email you’ve ever gotten in your life

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Rob Delaney @robdelaney.bsky.social · 12/01/2026

🕯️My cousin Brian passed away last night. After a courageous 3 wk stint with ICE. He slipped on a fellow agent’s frozen peepee puddle & somersaulted many times in the air, yelling “yabbada yabbada yabbada” & tragically aspirating (a different) agent’s pee he’d been gargling. He hated women🇺🇸💔

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🅿️rofessor Kiosk 💊 @professorkiosk.wtf · 28/10/2024

if I had a boss I would simply jump on their head three times to defeat them

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Patrick Monahan @pattymo.com · 15/08/2023

Just found out my mentor, the legendary figure who taught me everything I know, is the one behind the sinister plot I’ve been unraveling 👎

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Trevor A. Branch @trevorabranch.bsky.social · 09/09/2026

This is seismic news for fisheries scientists. Northern cod is *the* iconic symbol of total fisheries collapse due to overfishing (and other factors) *and* the iconic symbol of a complete failure to recover for decades afterwards. This is like announcing the complete recovery of bison on land.

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DougExeter @dougexeter.bsky.social · 08/09/2026

dig through the TINKER and burn through the TAILOR and slam in the back of my SOLDIER SPY

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Outbursts Of Everett True @everetttrue.bsky.social · 30/05/2025

The Evansville Press, April 10,1916

MY CARD.
MR. GEO. PUSHEM, EFFICIENCY EXPERT.

AND STAY OUT!
I HAVE NO USE FOR THE SHARP BOYS THAT GO AROUND SHOWING EMPLOYERS HOW THEY CAN KILL OFF THEIR HELP QUICKER BY
SHIFTING TUO MEN'S WORK
ONTO ONE!!!

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