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superherofbmx

@superherofbmx.bsky.social
455 followers 199 following 259 posts

Punk rock/comedy/sobriety/aching knee.

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GreyWeirdo @greyweirdo.bsky.social · 12/09/2026
Just one more thing. I can't get it off my mind and maybe you can help me. Who put the "bomp" in the bomp bah bomp bah bomp? You see what I mean? Boy, my wife, she loves those old songs. Also, how did the "ram" get into the rama lama ding dong? How would you account for that?
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Lieutenant Columbo Gestures & Investigates
Alt: Lieutenant Columbo Gestures & Investigates
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Wilbur72 @wilboo72.bsky.social · 13/09/2026
Me, in my head: Don’t do anything stupid! Me, 30 minutes later: Dammit
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T'Chelsea of the Fire Nation @mschelseamaria.bsky.social · 13/09/2026
Yes, eating raw cookie dough is risky. But if I drink piping hot tea at the same time, it will cook the cookie dough in my stomach.
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Dire Wolf @addiane.bsky.social · 13/09/2026
Love to drink a margarita and lay down on the floor.
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Mal a BOO 👻 @hallowedverses.bsky.social · 20/03/2026
You’ll survive but you’ll be funnier in ways that worries people
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Stone Cold Jane Austen @abbyhiggs.bsky.social · 12/09/2026
[The Beatles in 2026] Woke up, fell out of bed, checked my phone to see if he’s dead
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Stone Cold Jane Austen @abbyhiggs.bsky.social · 12/09/2026
“Still punktual as fuck,” I whisper as I arrive on time
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Kellalena @kellalena.bsky.social · 12/09/2026
Taking two traffic cones and doing a Madonna impression did not help my field sobriety test
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🎃EM-SCREAM-KAYVEE 🔪 @youremceekayvee.bsky.social · 08/09/2026
It’s not cunnilingME or cunnilingYOU, it’s cunnilingUS. ❤️
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Wilbur72 @wilboo72.bsky.social · 09/09/2026
New Orleans Your Mom 🏙️ The Big Easy
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Tusk Jenkins @tuskjenkins.bsky.social · 09/09/2026
Your pocket watch calls a timeout, which is strange because you have always kept it at a fancy distance from sports. Do you honor it? You're just a poor beneficiary in the grandpa part of town
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superherofbmx @superherofbmx.bsky.social · 09/09/2026
You shouldn't beat up people for wearing glasses. Unless of course it's those smart AI glasses in which case go nuts.
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ash @ashhull.bsky.social · 02/09/2026
Don't talk! You'll ruin it. <inspirational>
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Lizzy @stonedeva.bsky.social · 02/09/2026
Do better than your parents. Fuck your kids up in a completely different way.
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Wilbur72 @wilboo72.bsky.social · 02/09/2026
People eat Rocky Mountain Oysters? Well, that’s just nuts.
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AnarchoTerran @anarchoterran.bsky.social · 02/09/2026
Make it a tradition to throw a pie, rotten tomato, or egg at anyone that says "Lake America".
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Stone Cold Jane Austen @abbyhiggs.bsky.social · 01/09/2026
Guess I’ll swallow my pride unless that’s been recalled as well?!?
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strange ranger @lithiumsucks.bsky.social · 02/09/2026
Let me slip into something more comfortable...like a persistent vegetative state.
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Grant Tanaka @granttanaka.bsky.social · 02/09/2026
Me: [showing childhood trophies] this one's for swimming, this one's for football, this one's for soccer Her: I thought your name was Grant Me: lol this isn't even my house
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Viktor Winetrout @viktorwinetrout.bsky.social · 02/09/2026
Dolly Parton wrote “Jolene” and “I Will Always Love You” on the same day. Today I was too tired to peel a mango
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superherofbmx @superherofbmx.bsky.social · 02/09/2026
It's Father's Day this Sunday and it's Deadbeat Father's day next weekend I promise kiddo.
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Jimmer Cork-Bottle @jimmerthatisall.bsky.social · 26/08/2026
This day in history. 1346. At the Battle of Crécy a few thousand Welsh and English archers defeated a French army many times greater in number thanks to Jordans Chunky Traditional Porridge, British oats from nature friendly farms now available in the large economy size.
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Greg the Miller @gregthemiller.bsky.social · 24/08/2026
“Happy 10 Year Anniversary!” my boss emailed, reminding everyone that There Is No Escape
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Stone Cold Jane Austen @abbyhiggs.bsky.social · 25/08/2026
I feel like Trump’s gonna try to cash in on Iran’s $10M reward for attacking Barron
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superherofbmx @superherofbmx.bsky.social · 25/08/2026
Onions make you cry because they let out a gas that subconsciously reminds you of all the terrible, terrible things you've done.
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🎃HalloDeeny🎃 they/them @geraldinepiche.bsky.social · 24/08/2026
Clowns are born the same way that they get out of cars and its horrific to watch
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Wulfhelm @wulfhelm.bsky.social · 24/08/2026
Underrated actors. Billy Zane. Timothy Oliphant. My Nan, pretending she had no idea what happened to the sherry.
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Uncle Duke @uncleduke1969.bsky.social · 24/08/2026
“Walk in a sad cowboy, leave a jolly rancher.”
A store front with a sign that reads "HAND JOB SALOON" above the entrance, with a striped awning below it.
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Kellalena @kellalena.bsky.social · 24/08/2026
A disco aisle at the grocery store should be a thing
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A Shot of Steve™ ⚡️ @stevekoehler22.bsky.social · 24/08/2026
We pay 30% more for food that is 50% more risky to consume. Now there’s a winning economic strategy.
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Coach Rusty @coachrusty.bsky.social · 25/08/2026
some nights I take like 3 showers in a row just so I can stock up and take the rest of the week off
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cap’n watsisname @capnwatsisname.bsky.social · 25/08/2026
Dickens starts the whole book “it was the best of times, it was the worst of times,” like we don’t all know that meme you condescending Victorian
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superherofbmx @superherofbmx.bsky.social · 25/08/2026
I tried to get ChatGPT to translate "Informer" by Snow and my laptop exploded.
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Jerry Chen @jcsalterego.bsky.social · 25/08/2026
rip isaac newton, you would have loved apple bottom jeans
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Forrest Plump @nahyoudoit.bsky.social · 25/08/2026
Dating in your 40s is like trying to pat your head and rub your tummy at the same time except you’re drunk and you also don’t have arms
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Mal a BOO 👻 @hallowedverses.bsky.social · 25/08/2026
believe in yourself the way men believe they would’ve gone pro if it weren’t for that injury
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Kip Conlon @kipconlon.bsky.social · 25/08/2026
Are we allowed to look directly at the moon? Feels unaddressed.
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Jenny Lee Shee @jennyleeshee.bsky.social · 24/08/2026
I just saw a dog wearing a leash that said “Selectively Social” and now I need to find a necklace version of it for myself.
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Grant Tanaka @granttanaka.bsky.social · 25/08/2026
on this day exactly 40 years ago, my dad went out for a pack of cigarettes then came back an hour later and watched reruns of Kojak
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Jake_Vig @jakevig.bsky.social · 25/08/2026
Just list the foods we can still eat.
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Miss Havishambles @misshavishambles.bsky.social · 25/08/2026
Don’t turn my reposts off, they’re the best thing about me.
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Humor Satire Memes @funnysnarkyjoke.bsky.social · 24/08/2026
"There was no autism diagnosed before 1930."

Pluto wasn't discovered until 1930, pluto causes autism

[A picture of the planet Pluto against a black space background with white text overlaid above and below it]
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Fun @funkelly.bsky.social · 25/08/2026
if chickens wore pants, would they wear them like this or like this
Basic line drawing of a chicken but it’s been altered to look like it’s wearing a pair of pants on its head, with its head though the waistbandBasic line drawing of a chicken but it’s been altered to look like it’s wearing a pair of pants down around its ankles
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Wilbur72 @wilboo72.bsky.social · 24/08/2026
I just burned 3,000 calories in under an hour. I left the cookies in the oven too long.
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Steven (with a PH) @sjksalisbury.bsky.social · 25/08/2026
I'm not impressed by the robot that can run fast. I'm impressed by the robot that got out of having to do the race by forging a note from its mother.
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Bill Amend @billamend.bsky.social · 25/08/2026
I feel like the kids who did poorly in science and history class are trying to get revenge on the kids who did well at science and history class and now we’re all going to die
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superherofbmx @superherofbmx.bsky.social · 25/08/2026
The golden rule for successful dating is to never, ever let anyone see the real you.
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strange ranger @lithiumsucks.bsky.social · 24/08/2026
Here, let me overthink that for you.
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Andy Richter @andyrichter.co · 18/08/2026
If you guys are looking for a waiting room that’s always full of old women listening to Armenian Instagram reels at top volume, there’s a physical therapy clinic in Eagle Rock that really delivers
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