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Wilbur72

@wilboo72.bsky.social
12K followers 1.2K following 16K posts

Joker, drinker, bad golfer. Jersey boy living in NC. If you don’t ’like’ my post, I won’t like your reply.

PostsRepliesMedia
Reposted by Wilbur72
Jim @jimstewart.bsky.social · 46m
The hummingbirds appear to have left. The Julie's arrive. Coincidence? I think not.
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Eric Replatformed @21stcenturyeric.bsky.social · 32m
The inventor of the quarter speed twerk is named Slowly Butt Shirley
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Marc @runoldman.bsky.social · 2h
Ghosts in movies are stupid. If I was a ghost I'd be on a beach in St Thomas, but they're just like "Let's stay here and move pots and pans"
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A.L. likely @alvildalikely.bsky.social · 17h
I just woke up from a nap feeling overwhelmingly disappointed in The Butthole Surfers. Am I in the right timeline?
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Wilbur72 @wilboo72.bsky.social · 1h
Today’s grocery breakfast beer is an Octoberfest from Wicked Weed.
Glass of orange beer sitting in a grocery cart
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Tony @tonycrisler17.bsky.social · 11h
Me hearing: "Is there anybody out there?" It's the voice inside my head.
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Dead Reckons @gregreckons.bsky.social · 6h
I'm in beast mode! A sloth is a beast. Right?
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Eric Replatformed @21stcenturyeric.bsky.social · 3h
At 56 my super power is waking up feeling hung over after a big night of doing no drinking whatsoever.
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Jack @wakeupangry.bsky.social · 5h
When my parents die I’m totally going to change my name.
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DoubleTrouble @badboybill69.bsky.social · 3h
I can't sleep because the Two Wolves inside of me keep eating the sheep I'm trying to count 😤
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Jim @jimstewart.bsky.social · 22h
Just because my skeet was bad doesn't mean you should stop skeeting bad. I mean, why stop now?
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Wilbur72 @wilboo72.bsky.social · 23h
A coach finds a phone on the field and hands it to the Head Referee. Ref: How did you know it was my phone? Coach: It says you missed 15 calls.
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Jim @jimstewart.bsky.social · 03/10/2026
Julie 2: Invasion of the Julie Snatchers
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Jim @jimstewart.bsky.social · 03/10/2026
It's the annual Julie migration season.
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Wilbur72 @wilboo72.bsky.social · 03/10/2026
Anything can be a slow cooker if you turn the heat down low enough
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Dead Reckons @gregreckons.bsky.social · 03/10/2026
Ocean's Eleven, but it's just me and the voices in my head figuring out how to steal joy from myself.
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Wilbur72 @wilboo72.bsky.social · 03/10/2026
One summer I had a job setting up teepees I was a cone-tent creator
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Jack @wakeupangry.bsky.social · 03/10/2026
Three X-Men and a Baby
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DoubleTrouble @badboybill69.bsky.social · 02/10/2026
Pumpkin spice laxatives
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DoubleTrouble @badboybill69.bsky.social · 02/10/2026
Going back in time to the 80's would fix me
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Wilbur72 @wilboo72.bsky.social · 03/10/2026
Trump said he feels badly for the Cornell 7 And not a single one of us is surprised
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Dead Reckons @gregreckons.bsky.social · 03/10/2026
*drops it like it's hot* *dons oven mitts* *picks it back up*
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Marc @runoldman.bsky.social · 03/10/2026
Whenever I drive past the psychic's empty parking lot, I think, if I was psychic I would only be open on the days I knew people were coming.
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Jack @wakeupangry.bsky.social · 03/10/2026
Stifler is fifty.
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Wilbur72 @wilboo72.bsky.social · 03/10/2026
I’ve got 99 problems but your Mom ain’t one of them
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Wilbur72 @wilboo72.bsky.social · 03/10/2026
Love myself? Almost every night.
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Wilbur72 @wilboo72.bsky.social · 03/10/2026
Welp…I guess that friendship is over
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Dead Reckons @gregreckons.bsky.social · 03/10/2026
How many times did I say "WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK?!?" today? If your answer is entirely too many, you are correct.
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Jim @jimstewart.bsky.social · 02/10/2026
Me: I have used the word "fuck" way too many times this week. Fucking Friday!
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🍁𝒮𝒶𝓈𝓈𝓎 𝒢𝒾𝓇𝓁 🤍 @sassycanadian0.bsky.social · 02/10/2026
Someone's effort is the reflection of their interest in you.
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Frostbitten Flamingo @flemtheparrot.bsky.social · 02/10/2026
I like when I can be happy when someone else has something to be happy about.
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Salty MacTavish @saltymactavish.bsky.social · 02/10/2026
Someone wrote ‘boobs like church bells’ and I'll never write anything better than that
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Salty MacTavish @saltymactavish.bsky.social · 02/10/2026
How many times did Kerouac keep time on the 2nd and 4 with the butt of his whiskey glass while traveling interdimensionally during a tenor sax solo? How many brilliant tenor saxophonists died in obscurity?
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Wilbur72 @wilboo72.bsky.social · 02/10/2026
What’s the difference between an elevator and my parents? An elevator can raise a child. Yeah.
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Pot Shop Boo @potshopboy.bsky.social · 02/10/2026
I want to talk to the person who told Totino's they should get into the Ramen game.
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Jim @jimstewart.bsky.social · 02/10/2026
Thanks for all of the birthday wishes everybody! I'm saving them for April. 🎂🎂😂😂
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Wilbur72 @wilboo72.bsky.social · 02/10/2026
I referred to Octoberfest as The Big O-fest and now I’m not allowed back at the German restaurant.
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Jack Boot @jackboot.bsky.social · 02/10/2026
Sometimes my wife catches me in the kitchen whispering a version of the argument we just had but with me winning.
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Wilbur72 @wilboo72.bsky.social · 02/10/2026
Pizza roll, carnivore version
Bread roll containing 4 meats and cheese with pizza sauce for dipping
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lalalyds @lalalyds.bsky.social · 02/10/2026
Oh, sorry, haha. You see, I was mashing roasted garlic into softened butter on a rainy autumn afternoon, and I just don't give a fuck
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Jim @jimstewart.bsky.social · 02/10/2026
I left work at 4:20 I'm celebrating after work with 4:20 Time travel made possible by 4:20
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Dead Reckons @gregreckons.bsky.social · 02/10/2026
Her: You need to work on your communication skills. Me: 👍
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Jim @jimstewart.bsky.social · 02/10/2026
Me: Free bucket at Harbor Freight this weekend! Wife: That'll make six buckets you have. What are you doing with them? Me: Me: Free bucket at Harbor Freight this weekend!
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Wilbur72 @wilboo72.bsky.social · 02/10/2026
Just read that women wear flower panties in memory of all the faces that were buried down there.
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ande91.bsky.social @ande91.bsky.social · 02/10/2026
If you fail, congratulations,
most people don't even try.
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Wilbur72 @wilboo72.bsky.social · 02/10/2026
Live Laugh Let’s get some impeachments
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Ambooooorino 👻 @nellieadjacent.bsky.social · 02/10/2026
🎵 Pour your misery* down on me 🎵 *assumes your misery is gravy
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Wilbur72 @wilboo72.bsky.social · 02/10/2026
I’m not superstitious I’m just regular stitious
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Wilbur72 @wilboo72.bsky.social · 02/10/2026
Tried to sue the airline for misplacing my luggage. I lost the case.
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Wilbur72 @wilboo72.bsky.social · 02/10/2026
My coworkers call me E.T. because I always just want to go home.
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