gtemplin @gtemplin.bsky.social · 14/10/2026What is the German word for: the warmth one feels through a bag from your pet’s freshly deposited poop? 000 0
gtemplin @gtemplin.bsky.social · 10/10/2026www.instagram.com/reel/DePryDS...instagram.comInstagramCreate an account or log in to Instagram - Share what you're into with the people who get you. 100 0
Reposted by gtemplinmindflakes @mindflakes.bsky.social · 15/11/2024Keep your friend's clothes but keep your enemy's toaster 339279 0
Reposted by gtemplinconputer dipshit @davidcrespo.bsky.social · 26/09/2026I’m sorry, but if you bring gypsum - or any damn mineral below 3 on the Mohs scale at all - to a job interview, you’re disqualified. It’s not hard, people. 562066282 0
Reposted by gtemplinblink-sun8tzu @suntzufuntzu.bsky.social · 28/11/2024me: [advancing my knight] how much to build a hotel on this square? grim reaper: first, as I explained, that's not how the horse moves 4717177 0
Reposted by gtemplinkaranormal activity 💜 @deadontheoutside.bsky.social · 28/06/2026me: should i chronicle history or document current events? funk soul brother: write about now 273105750 0
Reposted by gtemplinOpinion Editor @ Bluesky @dly.bsky.social · 10/09/2026I hope this Ishmael finds you whale 332543555 0
Reposted by gtemplinmizer @mizer.bsky.social · 09/09/2026Feel like we've all memory-holed the word forgot 012417 0
Reposted by gtemplindonni saphire @donni.bsky.social · 05/09/2026If you continue to exist, you may be entitled to compensation 27112 0
Reposted by gtemplinCats of Yore @catsofyore.bsky.social · 28/08/2026The Oregon Trail reboot that the world needs right now. Postcard from my collection, no date/info. 362758347 0
Reposted by gtemplinKalvin the Reindeer @kalvinmacleod.bsky.social · 24/08/2026 If nobody pushes a button does it feel depressed? 511924 0
Reposted by gtemplinMary Gillis @marygillis.bsky.social · 24/08/2026One bean to rule them all One bean to find them One bean to bring them all and in the darkness bind them 581277247 0
Reposted by gtemplinIan Boudreau @ianboudreau.com · 16/08/2026A lot of people don't know this, but when you brush a cat, you are legally required to show them the wad of cat hair that came off of them and tell them "this is enough for another whole cat" 273124012096 0
Reposted by gtemplinDaisy @daisy91.bsky.social · 26/07/2026I got new shoes. I’ll race all you mfers 4128594 0
Reposted by gtemplinnew face in hell @shawnline.bsky.social · 02/07/2023They built a huge, ugly thought-control tower right next to my house but actually I love it so much 5537100 0
Reposted by gtemplinmindflakes @mindflakes.bsky.social · 29/07/2026I refuse to use my powers either for good or for evil. Mostly I just use them to make dachshunds very slightly longer 625472 0
Reposted by gtemplinKatie Didn’t @porkchophair.bsky.social · 13/06/2023I would run in my flip flops, but I don’t want you to fall in love with me. 312856 0
Reposted by gtemplinBraden Serkas 🎃 @portmanteauface.bsky.social · 04/01/2025ME: I didn't choose the thug life THEM: you're eating soup in a cardigan at 10:30 on a Tuesday morning ME: I could not have been more clear 688448866 0
Reposted by gtemplinLincoln Michel @thelincoln.bsky.social · 08/07/2026Tell me, what content do you plan to monetize with your one wild and precious life? 46919 0
Reposted by gtemplinphil @philjamesson.com · 08/07/2026dr jekyll: i can't operate on this man. he's me 2788 0
Reposted by gtemplinShade 5 @shade5.bsky.social · 07/07/2026Trump calling Infantino saying "he just needs to find four more goals" 05515 0
Reposted by gtemplindavid lunch @nicemustard.bsky.social · 04/07/2025hot dogs were invented in 1936 by Larry Hotdogs when he accidentally dropped a bag of prize-winning pig assholes in his Dick Shaper Machine 762172427 0
Reposted by gtemplinRMJ @rmccarthyjames.bsky.social · 03/07/2026I feel like we are technologically advanced enough that drawstrings should never disappear into sweatpants. I don’t feel like this is a big ask. I’d rather have this than LLMs 915125 0
Reposted by gtemplinChicken the Friendly Ghost @vermontchicken.bsky.social · 27/06/2026OnlyFans except it's just me, seeing how far I can lean back in different reclining chairs before I tip over. 423669 0
Reposted by gtemplinAndrew Coleman Francis @andrewcfrancis.bsky.social · 26/06/2026Happy #PrideMonth! Enjoy a Tesla getting smashed by a light rail train with a pride flag. 6568111841 0
Reposted by gtemplinDropped Mike @rebrafsim.bsky.social · 23/06/2026[yoga class] *hiding my lightsaber* misinformed I was 9543142 0
Reposted by gtemplinweeder @weeder.bsky.social · 21/06/2026Check out this sword stuck in a stone!! 95149523698 0
Reposted by gtemplinfuturedadOfTwo🙋🏻♂️ @lacroixboi.dadguy.pro · 08/05/2026you mess with the bull you get the horns. you mess with the goat you get the woodwinds. the horse has the string section and the rabbit is on percussion 241907656 0
Reposted by gtemplinPhilip Bump @pbump.com · 28/04/2026what if we made the whole country out of ballroom 691336151 0
Reposted by gtemplinkaranormal activity 💜 @deadontheoutside.bsky.social · 24/04/2026so they took away my sword and kicked me out because i kept saying "samurais and shine!" every morning 69529 0
Reposted by gtemplinIt's Abby. Yep @itsabbyyep.bsky.social · 21/04/2026Friend: Let's get together! What's your calendar look like? Me: Same picture of a dog on it till next month 4938147 0
Reposted by gtemplinUncle Duke @uncleduke1969.bsky.social · 05/04/2026about time someone called that motherfucker out 261137215 0
Reposted by gtemplinfuturedadOfTwo🙋🏻♂️ @lacroixboi.dadguy.pro · 27/03/2026shoot for the moon and if you miss you are not a good moon assassin 11373102 0
Reposted by gtemplinMarjorie James Keenan @unenthusiast.com · 20/05/2024a figment of your imaginewton 2175 0
Reposted by gtemplinsweetie π @sixfeetofcandy.bsky.social · 27/03/2026pls don’t rapture me until i finish eating the rest of the holiday fudge i have hidden in the freezer 510820 0
Reposted by gtemplinweeder @weeder.bsky.social · 20/03/2026On the one hand knuckle tattoos are cool, on the other hand they're dude 1140863 0
Reposted by gtemplinbatkaren @batkaren.bsky.social · 05/07/2023I stand under the shower's spray—blood from my would-be usurper clone twisting down the drain—and slowly realize all my scars are missing… 24722167 0
Reposted by gtemplindonni saphire @donni.bsky.social · 16/03/2026I am like the feral moose streaking through a forest at night who also has not seen any of this year’s award-winning films 0487 0
Reposted by gtemplinRedruM @dorsalstream.bsky.social · 11/03/2026“this could have been an email” bro this could have been a time in which I was ensconced deep within the bosom of our fertile planet 0153 0
Reposted by gtemplinmindflakes @mindflakes.bsky.social · 05/03/2026Square pizzas should be the standard. Square drinks and sides too. "Give me 17 square inches of dinner," you could say 920630 0