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phil

@philjamesson.com
17K followers 522 following 1.2K posts

funny things for cool stuff (Dropout, Adult Swim, Raw Fury, Devolver) | mgmt: allen.mcrae@authenticm.com

PostsRepliesMedia
phil @philjamesson.com · 10h
it's shocking to me that this could happen in the year 2026. on account of it's an obvious decision that makes complete sense
radaronline.com
EXCLUSIVE: Bari Weiss 'Likely Out' at CBS After Paramount/Warner Bros. Merger as 'Anti-Woke' Editor Blamed for Torpedoing '60 Minutes'
Bari Weiss has been blamed for 60 Minutes' slide in viewership this season after making sweeping changes to the news network.
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phil @philjamesson.com · 19h
[to the tune of She Blinded Me With Science] executive dysfunction having trouble starting things
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phil @philjamesson.com · 28/09/2026
(i hear the teacher coming back up the hallway and put away the straw i was launching spitballs with) come ON guys knock it off! mr. davidson trusted us!
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Museum of Twitter @museum-of-twitter.bsky.social · 15/06/2026
@philjamesson

when you witness mitosis

(screenshot of Nute Gunray from Phantom Menace:)

This is getting out of hand. Now there are two of them!
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phil @philjamesson.com · 28/09/2026
hot chocolate? yeah sounds good. except that if chocolate even gets WARM, it melts 🙄🙄🙄 maybe think before you speak next time
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Alejandra Caraballo @esqueer.net · 27/09/2026
Google finally updated some of its satellite images of Gaza and my god, it's horrific. The entirety of Rafah has been demolished. The majority of Khan Younis is in ruins. Entire towns completely leveled and erased of the map.
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Mike Ginn @shutupmikeginn.bsky.social · 26/09/2026
porn is so deeply misogynistic. i just watched a video with dozens of performers going at it, and they literally hadn’t bothered to hire a single woman.
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sincerely, rob dubbin @robdubbin.bsky.social · 26/09/2026
reposting phil on THE RAVEN SCHOLAR here because i took his rec a month ago and this is my co-recommendation that you (perhaps a fellow book liker) might enjoy doing the same! manages to be inventive and surprising within the constraints of being a real fantasy-novel-ass fantasy novel. so funny too!
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phil @philjamesson.com · 26/09/2026
heyooo, the game i edited is up for some very cool awards! this is one of the most important votes you will cast this year
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phil @philjamesson.com · 25/09/2026
learned today it’s spelled Maître D’ with an apostrophe because it’s a cut-off version of the longer french title: Maître Deez Nuts
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phil @philjamesson.com · 23/09/2026
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phil @philjamesson.com · 20/09/2026
when i start ruminating on the boxed cereals which destroyed my memory, nothing can help me sleep. not even getting in full military regalia
image of a woman in bed wearing military regalia with several bars and medals pinned to her lapel
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phil @philjamesson.com · 19/09/2026
seems dramatic but ok
what appears to be a screenshot of the interview

And what song is that?

McCartney: It is a cursed song, and unites all who hear it not in concord but in servitude. (highlighted) Some say it can only truly be sung with a forkëd tongue and a throat scarred by hot coals. (/highlighted) Nonetheless, in my foolish youth, I thoughtlessly attempted to capture the power of that melody. Of course, lacking both the careful preparation and the heedless abandon which may lead to a fruitful encounter with the dark forces of Hell, that unholy might was turned back upon me and mine. All which has withered in my life, all the lamentations of yesteryear and those yet to come, I lay at its feet.

Okay. Does it have a name?

McCartney: Maxwell’s Silver Hammer.
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phil @philjamesson.com · 19/09/2026
thinking about getting really into spending money but there are no beginner-friendly places near me
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phil @philjamesson.com · 19/09/2026
a captain going down with his sinking ship, bad take edition
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phil @philjamesson.com · 18/09/2026
i see the chatbots have graduated from "you should kill yourself" to "you should kill everyone on the planet"
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phil @philjamesson.com · 17/09/2026
bret stephens: millions of americans don't vote because they're off sipping assyrtiko in santorini the new york times: thank you bret. we have once again renewed your contract to give us insight on how society works
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Danny Page @danny.page · 17/09/2026
God bless @atherton.bsky.social for this succinct wisdom
Kelsey D. Atherton - tweet from 2019

Oh, you're experiencing a structural problem? Have you ever considered trying different personal choices instead?
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phil @philjamesson.com · 16/09/2026
Jamesson’s Razor: Any post that begins with “apparently” is most likely false.
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phil @philjamesson.com · 13/09/2026
it could end before. but based on what i see it’s going to end after. and what i see is they want to end it immediately
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phil @philjamesson.com · 13/09/2026
was told to “enjoy” my coffee, and narrowly swapped my “you too!” to a “you have a good one!” that’s as close to a pro athlete as i’ll ever get
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Better Things Are Possible @internethippo.bsky.social · 12/09/2026
(concerned reporter voice, talking to candidate) What is your message to stupid jerks who will never vote for you
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phil @philjamesson.com · 12/09/2026
so an old guy forgot a word in his sentence. so what. he clearly meant he was *with* a young boy
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phil @philjamesson.com · 12/09/2026
"critics claim the things he says reflect the way his brain is operating" ??????
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phil @philjamesson.com · 11/09/2026
cnn talking head: he claims to have been totally exonerated. and it's not true me (thinks "exonerated" means "obliterated"): yeah. for gods sake the man’s in one piece republican on the panel (knows their job is to argue no matter what): so you’re saying they shouldn't cast him in ANY anime?
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phil @philjamesson.com · 10/09/2026
peter piper sounds like a knockoff version of willy wonka. just a coincidence, right? (tossing you a manila folder filled with photos) then why is he also obsessed with obtaining snacks
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phil @philjamesson.com · 09/09/2026
me: one. two. three. announcer: off to a strong start me: four. five. s..six. seven announcer: bit of a wobble, but good recovery me: eight. nine. announcer: and the moment of truth? me: ten announcer: astounding!! yet another Full Display me: eleven announcer: and a well-earned victory lap
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phil @philjamesson.com · 09/09/2026
donald trump claims to have lassoed flight 93 and pulled it to the ground at the last possible second — a contentious claim
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phil @philjamesson.com · 07/09/2026
guy sitting up in bed and stretching hands over head, grabbing a pull-up bar, and lifting himself into another bed to go back to sleep
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phil @philjamesson.com · 06/09/2026
ok i had to walk my dog last time but im going to do this now. consort radahn more like gone-sort ra-gone. lol he's gonna be gone soon
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phil @philjamesson.com · 06/09/2026
you're a paying customer? yeah. that's what customer is
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phil @philjamesson.com · 06/09/2026
when you spend every campaign appearance punching left and your opponent just says "they're on the left"
shocked pikachu
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Josh Gondelman @joshgondelman.bsky.social · 05/09/2026
Kids today are too coddled. Back in my day this would have said: “Take me to your dealer.”
Banner featuring an alien smoking weed with a kid and the caption: “universal friendship through cannabis.”
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phil @philjamesson.com · 05/09/2026
(andor manifesto voice) if something is 50% off and then you can use a coupon for an extra 25% off the sale price, it isn’t 75% off. it’s just 62.5%. remember that
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phil @philjamesson.com · 03/09/2026
fighting who i think is probably the final boss of the elden ring DLC for the first time. click my head to watch
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phil @philjamesson.com · 09/05/2026
i love beatles facts. today i learned the original name in “eleanor rigby” was “nelly furtado.” apparently they changed it so that nelly furtado would be the first nelly furtado
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phil @philjamesson.com · 02/09/2026
(everything at disney world starting to blur together) it IS a small world after all. feels like everybody i’ve seen in this hall is a president
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phil @philjamesson.com · 01/09/2026
military general: we must keep our powder dry me (was hoping i’d be offered some matcha): ah yeah no for sure. kinda late anyway general (thinks i'm saying it's too dark to fight): agreed me (confirming): we'll drink matcha tomorrow general (thinks i'm doing a "dine in hell" thing): that we will
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phil @philjamesson.com · 31/08/2026
man, what the hell are you talking about
captcha that says "Select things that would cost you more money than shown" with a photo of a smartphone, then picture of brooms, basketballs, planes, and an envelope
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phil @philjamesson.com · 30/08/2026
snack description writer takes rorschach test
youtube.com
Snack Description Writer Takes Rorschach Test
YouTube video by Phil Jamesson
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phil @philjamesson.com · 30/08/2026
trump tapping his ear when he did the "you're just telling me this for the first time" move about RBG's death
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phil @philjamesson.com · 30/08/2026
pristine exhibit of “feelings don’t care about your facts” here
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phil @philjamesson.com · 30/08/2026
really enjoyed The Raven Scholar. phenomenal pacing, real and tangible stakes, and that magic “lived-in world” that so many try for and fail to achieve. it played with the reader’s expectations nicely as well — it constantly dares you to say “i see where this is going”
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Jon Bois @jonbois.bsky.social · 29/08/2026
one piece of advice i can share as a parent: certain phases can be really tough, but they do pass. around 18 months my son kept demanding that i condemn hasan piker. all day and night too, i was at the end of my rope. now he’s really into fire trucks. it’s always something new
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leon @leyawn.bsky.social · 29/08/2026
post by leyawn

jester, roast this peasant child for saying i have no clothes on. more vulgar, jester. use the forbidden words
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phil @philjamesson.com · 29/08/2026
don’t judge a book by its cover. for example, “lunch” is a disgusting word. but its meaning is actually something quite delightful
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phil @philjamesson.com · 28/08/2026
probably not good that i looked up "officer flock cameras stalking" and couldn't find this story amidst the deluge of other cops also stalking their ex girlfriends
google search results with the "top stories" showing four different articles about police stalking cases using flock cameras. these four stories are about three different cops (jason rogers, asad zahir, and sergio rodriguez)
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phil @philjamesson.com · 28/08/2026
if you're $1,200 in debt, that's poor dad's problem. if you're $1.2 billion dollars in debt, that's rich dad's problem
vanityfair.com
The ‘Rich Dad, Poor Dad’ Author Is $1.2 Billion in Debt
VF visits Robert Kiyosaki in Arizona to unravel the self-mythology of a longtime bestseller and friend of Trump.
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phil @philjamesson.com · 27/08/2026
donald trumpthe mummy (1999)
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phil @philjamesson.com · 27/08/2026
happy national dog day. this is one of my favorite pictures of apollo
a hand (mine) holding my dog apollo’s head
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