e.w. niedermeyer @niedermeyer.online · 29/01/2026hi folks, serious journalist here, it's important to understand that this all makes perfect sense if you've completely cooked your brain on Elon fanboy bullshit for the last decade 1592684410
Bill Lummis @wblummis.bsky.social · 29/01/2026Strapping on my jet pack to replace the failing harddrive that's in polar orbit 000
maxl49.bsky.social @maxl49.bsky.social · 30/01/2026Here for the rocket that explodes with the million dollars worth of chips on it 100
🎃 Can't Think of Spooky Name 🎃 @noclevername.bsky.social · 30/01/2026tbf, that would be very vertical integration 010
PhoenixWomanMN @phoenixwomanmn.bsky.social · 30/01/2026Orbital data centers... or the most leveraged person in history trying to get his business holdings squared away before the value of his Tesla holdings drops below the value he's pledged to the banks. 040
Diogenes Dog @iamdiogenesdog.bsky.social · 30/01/2026Oh my god, we’re getting SkyNet aren’t we? They watched another movie and missed the point entirely, again, and now we’re gonna have to defeat SkyNet in 20 years Except it’ll have a name like “SUCC 69” and Elon will make a fucking meme coin out of it 021
Doug Simpkinson @douglips.com · 30/01/2026bsky.app/profile/doug...Doug Simpkinson@douglips.comHey, uh, so I know I said we should host our service in the L2 datacenter but I’m getting like 10000 ms latencies on all my requests. No matter how much I optimize the code it always takes 10 seconds. Any suggestions? Also: How much diesel do we have there and what’s the lead time to get more? 020
Josie ジョシー 🇵🇸 @josieweather.bsky.social · 31/01/2026Me when I don’t understand economies of scale and have a cushy tech journalist job I got via nepotism (probably) 000
Rupert Stubbs @rupertstubbs.bsky.social · 30/01/2026Sensible (and not totally damning) analysis here: open.substack.com/pub/andercot...open.substack.comDo Orbital Data Centers Make Sense?What are the economics and physics behind constructing orbital data centers and will this make sense in the future? 010
Spudmonkey @spudmonkey.bsky.social · 29/01/2026Falcon heavy has a cost to LEO of ~$1500/kg. That is gonna be one expensive fucking data center. 010
Bob @bobisjim.bsky.social · 29/01/2026It also kinda fits the "everyone is 12" theory. Because so many people who are space x fan boys think that building rockets and going to space is going to solve all of the world's problems. 090
Vagabending @vagabending.bsky.social · 29/01/2026It feels like this should be obvious but being able to be CEO of a bunch of companies and then randomly merge then as you see fit with no oversight when billions are on the line... feels --- wacky as hell 0150
Onboard Navvy @onboard-navvy.bsky.social · 30/01/2026I haven't seen such an implicational distance between an if and a then since 'frogs having wings' and 'the likelihood of bumping their asses a-hopping'. 000
MickeyBuntz Estes @mickey-buntzestes.bsky.social · 29/01/2026Yes brilliant. Let's get an unstable satellite into orbit the size of the sears tower and trust Elmo to keep the sky from actually falling 010
Mash @itismashagain.bsky.social · 29/01/2026I have decided to put AI data centers on Jupiter’s moon Europa. Please give me billions. 010
Captain Capybara @vought.bsky.social · 29/01/2026Ars Technica is a weird place. Wonder into an article about Tesla by Gitlin and it’s full of people trashing Elon and all the products that descend from his weirdo cabal. Say the same stuff in a space/x thread by Berger and you’ll be downloaded into invisibility, perhaps out of extreme immaturity. 0151
Captain Capybara @vought.bsky.social · 29/01/2026Weird how Condé Nast has a problem with access journalism. Berger is worse than Nuzzi was - she was at least transparent about wanting to schtup RFKj. Berger won’t admit he wants a horse. 050
Chuck @chuckrudolph.bsky.social · 29/01/2026Asking the “if”s in that paragraph to carry all that weight 020
anxietism @merci.chaton.lol · 29/01/2026elon drones are inventing marxism-leninism from first principles 000
Fergal @fergalyyz.bsky.social · 29/01/2026Also worth mentioning, that heat from these (very) speculative data centers will not radiate away efficiently, and cosmic radiation will destroy integrity of electronics in orbit. Putting technology in space is not a panacea. 020
Spoopy Scary Samantha Sent Shivers Down Your Spine @hijacker.bsky.social · 30/01/2026This guy uses more buzz words than Bud Askins 010
Matthew McLeod @vai.noetic.work · 30/01/2026[drones turn out actually useful] Uh, I've got another one! Crypto, AI, and *rockets*! 000
m00nstreake.bsky.social @m00nstreake.bsky.social · 29/01/2026We'll just use nukes for power and convert the sysadmins' waste to methane and boil it off to cool the servers! Brilliant. 000
DJ - ABOLISH MAGA @djsndnkxnsn.bsky.social · 29/01/2026ALSO, Optimus humanoid robots will soon operate all the SpaceX operations and will need ground transportation. This is where the Cybercab has even more upside potential than realized! At least 80% of Cybercab passengers will actually be Optimus humanoid robots! 020
Ben Cotton (he/him) @funnelfiasco.bsky.social · 30/01/2026Feels like there's a lot of load-bearing "if"s in that post. 000
WOKE KONG @wokekong.bsky.social · 29/01/2026Turning the stock market into one big ai-backed parlay 020
barbarism decliner @2names1scott.com · 29/01/2026orbital data centers will be easy! just radiate the heat back out with, uhh, silver! 010
elmobronowski.bsky.social @elmobronowski.bsky.social · 29/01/2026Wins the Kipling award for most "ifs" stacked on top of each other this decade 000
Rens @shadur.bsky.social · 30/01/2026Each of those assertions only sounds feasible to someone who doesn't know a single goddamn thing about the technologies they describe. 010
Jack of a Couple of 🎃Lanterns🎃 @tcepsa.bsky.social · 29/01/2026Going to be darkly, ironically hilarious if one of these orbital data centers ends up being the thing that kicks off the Kessler Syndrome and destroys everyone's space-based capabilities 010
Jeff Kranz @jeffkra.nz · 29/01/2026Couching "orbital data centers are feasible" as an "if you believe is feasible" is such a cowardly weasel wording for someone who is supposed to be a "science guy" jfc 1350
Jake Cob @jakobpunkt.bsky.social · 10/02/2026If you believe three completely preposterous things in contravention of all evidence... 000
Photoonist @photoonist.bsky.social · 30/01/2026Probably should merge it some fusion power company, too, to complement its aquistion of Elon‘s brother’s company, SolarCity. And also, the Mars company. Great synergies with its products like Mars Bars and Milky Ways. 000
rogeywarded.bsky.social @rogeywarded.bsky.social · 30/01/2026If we manage to break the laws of physics then this will be a neat company 🙂 000
Raging Spirit @ragingspirit.bsky.social · 30/01/2026I thought i was harsh on Eric for his book, he managed to prove me wrong. Dude has literally no idea what he writes about. 041
Madeadeleine 💀 @pbastronaut.bsky.social · 30/01/2026I like how this is framed like "the reported merger talks between Pepsi and Diet Pepsi". 020
Okay @okaycondition.bsky.social · 30/01/2026This is hands down the funniest thing I have read all day. 000
Ric - POTUS is a pedophile @facedamuzk.bsky.social · 30/01/2026...which could mean trying to be like him, smoking the Special K. 000
Epstein files or bust 🇺🇦 @crackermack.bsky.social · 29/01/2026Listen to me, if Burger King and Taco Bell integrate vertically, we could have the first case of space diarrhea! 110
Abu Dhabi Dude @abudhabidude.bsky.social · 29/01/2026Yeah it’s the same logic as “it makes perfect sense for Tesla to buy out Solar City as it makes for a vertically integrated green energy colossus.” How did that work out for them? 010
Rahvin @rahvin.bsky.social · 29/01/2026Or you're just a gibbering idiot. Of course, those two things are not mutually exclusive. 000
Subterfugitive @subterfugitive.bsky.social · 30/01/2026We need to socialize SpaceX away from that monster. He is going to ruin space for all of us. 000
eschneider @eschneider.bsky.social · 30/01/2026It also makes perfect sense if you recall the WorldCom accounting games. Mergers make it so much harder to compare historical financials... 030
Encapsidate Your Genome @encapsidated.bsky.social · 30/01/2026Holy shit, the "If" in that post is doing an UNBELIEVABLE amount of heavy lifting there. Just straight up magical thinking completely unmoored from reality with these people 000
* There Are Bot @diogeneslamp.bsky.social · 29/01/2026I miss the good old days when the Elonscam was building a racially pure ethnostate on a planet with no oxygen 191
Texas Chainsaw Massakim @kimtillman.bsky.social · 30/01/2026Imagine looking at all the things that are happening simultaneously in the world and thinking compute is our biggest problem. 👀 wtf. 000
Lars Hansson @romabysen.bsky.social · 30/01/2026"If you beleive in fairy tales then this is a good idea." 000
bleary @bleary.off-the-records.com · 29/01/2026Merging cars, AI and space travel is obvious if, like me, you think Transformers is real 1661
Chanandler Bong @amyisverybusy.bsky.social · 29/01/2026Those "ifs" are doing a lot of heavy lifting. 010
Joe Friday I'm In Love @ultramod2.bsky.social · 29/01/2026What if I believe none of those things? 010
Jacob Aron @jjaron.bsky.social · 30/01/2026It's pretty clear Berger isn't saying that he believes this, but that Musk does? 240
Dag. @3fecta.bsky.social · 29/01/2026He is going to put the robots on top of each other, until they reach Mars, so we can climb up and build a base. It's genius! 1172
Steve in Manhattan @steve-in-manhattan.bsky.social · 29/01/2026can flying cars and robots doing our chores be far behind? 000
Westley Graham-Paige @wesnotfewer.bsky.social · 29/01/2026Eric is pretty sure that if he keeps doing this a little while longer, that Elon will want to hang out with him outside of work. 1150
W.E. Larson @welarson.bsky.social · 29/01/2026The xAI Colossus DC is supposed to start off with 200k GPUs. Power requirements for 1k GPUs is about what the ISS can produce with its solar panels. So to put that compute power is orbit is launching and maintaining 200 ISS's and that's a really, really optimistic estimate on the feasibility 121
Claire @clrthrn.bsky.social · 30/01/2026Anyone who think Musk is a serious person probably still has a $50k deposit open on a car that was supposed to be released in 2020. 010
His Bark Materials🏳️⚧️🏳️🌈🌌 @oneiriccanid.bsky.social · 29/01/2026Orbital data centres are the literal worst idea how the fuck are these people taken seriously? 83281
Sane English @saneenglish.bsky.social · 29/01/2026In recent Science Friday interview with Benjamin Lee, Professor of Electrical and Systems Engineering at U Penn, he explains why this is, one might say, pie in the sky www.sciencefriday.com/segments/inf...sciencefriday.comSecrets Of Ancient Concrete, And... Data Centers In Space?What can we learn from a Pompeii construction site preserved in ash? Plus, tech companies look to build solar-powered data centers in space. 011
Nick Principe @nickdachrome.bsky.social · 30/01/2026And speeds up the firing of thousands of entry level positions filled by humans Jobs like paralegals will be the first to go Disgusting 🤢 000
Will Lawless @willlawless.bsky.social · 29/01/2026media.tenor.coma man in a black shirt and black pants is walking through a dirt field .Alt: a man in a black shirt and black pants is walking through a dirt field . 000
Cephalopod Empire Appreciator @sinistermrcream.bsky.social · 29/01/2026The fleet of robotaxis will act as access points, providing fast upload to the data center. In the event you can't pay on time, an Atlas robot will arrive to ensure compliance. 010
Matt Pinwall (发件人) 🇬🇱🌮 @mobypinball.bsky.social · 30/01/2026The same AI platform that has difficulty with four function arithmetic 000
Kevin Duffy-Greaves @kduffygreaves.bsky.social · 29/01/2026You’re saying I should pump the brakes with SciGuySpace? Excuse me??? 040
Cozy and Comforting Hedgie 🌻 @shadow.hedgie.social · 29/01/2026unfortunately the orbital DC brainworms have broken containment, don't have to be a fanboy to get infected 020
SERIOUS PROFESSIONAL, PH.D. @djmosfett.bsky.social · 29/01/2026IF you believe orbital data centers are a thing; and IF you believe your ass is your elbow; and IF 030
Hugh Kearney @myfisttoe.bsky.social · 30/01/2026I read the quote, but instead of the words on the page, I keep hearing the reverse vampire dialogue between Bart and Milhouse. 010
Drop D @dropdea.bsky.social · 29/01/2026If you wrote this as an episode for a fictional dark satire about mayo-brained cult members who hilariously love every insane thing their leader does, you'd be thrown out of the writers' room. 010
Killface @maple-enjoyer.bsky.social · 29/01/2026I believe in floating data centres on the high seas. We can use old oil tankers and use get the staff addicted to something so they never want to leavemedia.tenor.coma group of men are standing on a boat in the ocean . one of the men is holding an umbrella .ALT: a group of men are standing on a boat in the ocean . one of the men is holding an umbrella . 000
Tom (kid codger) O'Neill @doctecazoid.bsky.social · 30/01/2026And then factor in Elon's been cooking his brain with Ketamine for a number of years now ...media.tenor.coma cartoon of homer simpson with a picture of a donkey in his headAlt: a cartoon of homer simpson with a picture of a donkey in his head 000
Madness Table @rollforphobia.bsky.social · 29/01/2026If the Titan sub hadn’t imploded and ruined the vibe they would absolutely be pitching underwater data centres. “And the best part is, we can get gold from the seawater we’re using for coolant! It pays for itself!” 1211
Xeynon @xeynon.bsky.social · 30/01/2026If you believe that orbital data centers are feasible, you need to go back and actually pass high school physics before trying to run a tech company. 040
Night of the Living Red Durkin @daedsider.bsky.social · 29/01/2026What if I don't believe any of that, Eric? What then? 080
Dark Barclay @rabidhatchet.bsky.social · 29/01/2026We're just going to steal all the water and air from planet Earth to cool them and the nuclear reactors 000
That Fake Lego Thing From The Island Of Misfit Toys @tmcatee.bsky.social · 29/01/2026And finally, the TSLA rugpull as existing investors are diluted! 000
Lena of Lune @lena.isextremely.gay · 29/01/2026If you believe what Eric Berger is saying, you don't understand anything about compute or space tech 030
Radical Lowlife Normie @mikebrode.bsky.social · 29/01/2026Confiscatory taxes for multi-billionaires. They say the government can’t spend money better than them, then they crash their businesses because of their racism, blow tons on pet projects like metaverse and space servers or waste it on space trips for their fiancés. Just take it from them! 010
Robin Marwick @electricland.bsky.social · 09/02/2026Minor quibble but “compute” as a noun will never cease to annoy me 010
Lizard @lizardky.bsky.social · 09/02/2026And if you believe all those things, I've got 50 million in a foreign account and I need help transferring it. 010
Blimple @blimple.bsky.social · 30/01/2026If you believe heat can be vented into a vacuum AND you believe investors will never want to get paid AND you believe Tesla is abandoning its core business because it’s WON CARS you are going to be just fine regardless because the real world ain’t involved in your perfect calculation 061
ladystardust ☮️ @ladystardust64.bsky.social · 29/01/2026People with FAR more money than sense should concentrate on ensuring Earth remains habitable and all who live here have the basics of shelter, food, healthcare, and dignity. 120
Cube (1997, Dir. Vincenzo Natali) @prototypecube.bsky.social · 30/01/2026some real load-bearing ifs there 010
e @accessorial.bsky.social · 30/01/2026Berger’s bullshit is why I had to cancel my Ars subscription last year 010
twistmeyer.bsky.social @twistmeyer.bsky.social · 30/01/2026How many hunter-killer satellites are already up there, and can you rent time on them like communications satellites? 010
Kevin Chadwick @kevlar700.bsky.social · 29/01/2026My guess. Elon needs money in Tesla and XAI because XAI is the worst of the AI bunch. The only place he's maybe set to get a gov cash injection is into SpaceX. 120
izzy @isobel.top · 30/01/2026if you believe a bunch of absolute nonsense then this even bigger pile of nonsense is a great bet! 050
Michael DuBose @michaeldubose.dev · 29/01/2026Everyone seemed to be obsessed with their Stanley cups there for a while. They should maybe google how those are insulated sometime. Then maybe google what most of space is. You know, just for the funsies 170
Tacoma Mike @mgb5000.bsky.social · 29/01/2026Ballpark figures a 2GW orbital data center would need around 3 to 4 square miles of solar panels on the sunny side and cooling radiators on the dark side. Maybe he plans to build the truss framework out of recycled crushed cybtertrucks. 000
Circumspectral @catpushmike.bsky.social · 30/01/2026 Why should we care what a Twitter rando thinks? 000
Immigrant now citizen @now-citizen.bsky.social · 29/01/2026Yeah - orbital data centers. Latency, extra radiation risk on chips, cost of launch, need small nuclear or massive solar (risk of debris hitting, triggering a debris storm). Excellent from the guy who has promised FSD for (I think) 10 years now.. 2110
rgbose.bsky.social @rgbose.bsky.social · 30/01/2026Lol, space data centers?! Wil they make electricity with fairy dust? 000
Brightmarsh @brightmarsh.bsky.social · 29/01/2026But space radiation will fry the data centers. Space is cold but because its a vacuum that would have a sizable impact 130
From Kolob In Peace @hightokolob.bsky.social · 29/01/2026Just doing any damn thing besides building a functional lunar lander. 030
Terrence Nowicki, Jr. @deephurting.bsky.social · 29/01/2026Everyone who uses the term "compute" as a noun is an idiot and/or a grifter. 2161
Leonard Sultana (An Englishman In San Diego) @englishmansdcc.bsky.social · 29/01/2026Leonard Sultana (An Englishman In San Diego)@englishmansdcc.bsky.socialI stand with Elon Musk. I stand with Tesla and SpaceX and Grok and Autopilot. I stand with loading Grok and Autopilot on to a SpaceX Dragon self piloting rocket along with a very proud and confident Elon Musk and launching that puppy. Go for it, Elon! Your destiny awaits! 031
daryl "rupert pumpkin" b 🏳️⚧️ @hypercubexl.bsky.social · 29/01/2026orbital data centers! do a shot 2940
Brian Hill @brianhill53703.bsky.social · 09/02/2026The big problem with "AI" isn't compute. It's DEMAND. Nobody wants this. 110
big_throwaway (仮) @secondthrowaway.bsky.social · 29/01/2026this guy's bluesky profile says he's the senior science editor at ars technica so surely he's joking, right "if you believe this nonsense this is a huge deal" that's a hell of an "if" 100
Dan Davis @bindlestiff.bsky.social · 30/01/2026“If you believe in peanut butter, and you believe in chocolate…” 020
yoyoma2024.bsky.social @yoyoma2024.bsky.social · 29/01/2026Screams of Enron cooking the books - Putting 3 companies together so many ways to fudge numbers. 010
It’s yer da! @bengc.bsky.social · 29/01/2026It all makes perfect sense as a dumb thing Elon would do to ruin yet another one of his companies. 010
_borntobemild @born2bemild.bsky.social · 30/01/2026No but I believe in life after love.media.tenor.coma close up of a woman 's face with blue eyes and feathers in her hairAlt: snippet from Cher's Life After Love video 010
Mr. Spooky, If You're Nasty @mrskippy69.myatproto.social · 29/01/2026Yeah "if you believe a bunch of horseshit, a stupid thing makes perfect sense" isnt a revelation lol 020
EveningStarNM @eveningstarnm.bsky.social · 29/01/2026There are a lot of people who would like to have a data center in space. Not all of them are crazy. A lot of them are sane enough to not want one on the ground. 000
Embrrrrrrr @embrrrrrrr.bsky.social · 29/01/2026Why would anyone with any amount of measurable brain function believe any of these things? 000
Naedere @naedere.bsky.social · 30/01/2026Eric is a fucking meteorologist too. He can call this bullshit from multiple angles based on his experience and understanding of physics. Extremely disappointing to see him running cover for Elon's shit cause big rocket cool 030
Rob Honeycutt @robhon.bsky.social · 29/01/2026Hooboy, the ensuing collapse of all this stuff is going to be spectacular to behold. 010
Tom Easton @tomeaston.bsky.social · 30/01/2026“If we had some ham we could have ham and eggs. If we had some eggs.” 050
Sagittarius A* @sagastar.bsky.social · 29/01/2026lol what if don't believe in stupid fake bullshit like "orbital datacenters" 080
Darrel “Carnivorous” Plant @darrelplant.bsky.social · 30/01/2026There's a whole lotta believin' going on there… 010
Shugunou.EXE @shugunou.bsky.social · 29/01/2026It also makes sense if your brain was cooked by a Neurolink chip. 000
Jake Downs @whitevenezuelan.bsky.social · 29/01/2026It just needs a few more semicolons, then it'll make sense 010
James McClure @pfadge.bsky.social · 29/01/2026"Orbital Data Centers" is the name of my Death Cab for Cutie cover band. 0150
Guy Dawson @cuillin.org · 30/01/2026Orbital data centres are a distraction; like The Boring Company and Hyperloop. 020
Ian Moone @ianmoone1970.bsky.social · 30/01/2026Lol that merger seems like a desperate attempt to hide losses at Xitter and xai behind the no bid govt contacts to SpaceX. It's certainly no grand plan for "orbital data centers" 0100
🧟♀️ Ditty Doop and the Creppy Spoops 🎃 @goosname.bsky.social · 29/01/2026“if you believe orbital data centers are feasible” that’s an “if” big enough to have its own gravitational pull 120
MisanthropeLovesBirds𓄿𓄿 @bird-nerdco.bsky.social · 30/01/2026If he can make it happen, there’s always Kessler Syndrome to look forward to 110
ImDavidDunn @imdaviddunn.bsky.social · 30/01/2026Why isn’t anyone discussing his compensation package and how SpaceX would help him reach the metrics? Is there some type of exclusion I’m not aware of? 020
Mark D Larsen @yanquetino.bsky.social · 30/01/2026Hmmm. I wonder if E’loon Isherwell will make this conglomerate start to produce more flamethrowers, tequila, short pants, hyperloops, tunnels, social media platforms, neurolinks, and robots! 000
Garth Marenghi's Catbus @catbus.phd · 29/01/2026"if you believe a bunch of absolute bullshit, then...." lol 1891
Sun Shade @sunshade.blue · 30/01/2026"sorry guys, grok can't photoshop your dick to be bigger right now. we blew up all the computers with the rocket again. I just don't understand why this keeps happening, grok said it would work and that I was the most special boy" 000
Itstoasted @mttthww.bsky.social · 29/01/2026Why are Musk people using "compute" as a noun? We already have multiple nouns to express computing. 010
Drives Like a Dream @urban-achiever.bsky.social · 29/01/2026it's the platonic ideal of linkedin gobbledygook. i am humbled by his mastery of the art of stringing together so many words that mean fuckall to anyone who knows what the fuck they are talking about. 41131
Julia Is Waving, Not Drowning @booktweeting.bsky.social · 29/01/2026I would very much like to inspect that gentleman’s wallet at my earliest convenience 1370
B’rel @brelknight.bsky.social · 30/01/2026Orbital data centers are not feasible. Space isn’t cold. You need to cool data centers they produce massive amounts of heats so even the smallest data center in orbit would need massive heat radiators. 020
Una the Archivist 📜 @preserver.archivistorder.com · 29/01/2026"orbital data centers are feasible"media.tenor.coma close up of a man 's face with blue eyes looking at the camera .Alt: Surprised blinking man 030
🍀Leprechanarchy🍀 @braindroplets.bsky.social · 29/01/2026As Tesla continues its plummet, mElon is just going to get more detached from reality. 010
Shivvers in Fear 🙀 @shivvy.blacksky.app · 29/01/2026well they’re right that IF you can swallow all that stuff, dot dot dot 030
Weird Bisexual Wooper @goldensama.bsky.social · 29/01/2026How is anyone still riding Musk's dick after the dumpsterfire of Doge??? 010
Aaron @the-aero-engineer.bsky.social · 29/01/2026Orbital data centers for AI “compute” (anyone that says compute unironically is already an unserious person in my book) is like claiming this makes sense if you think of Star Trek as reality 0140
Ben @ben9311.bsky.social · 09/02/2026Undersea data centers make far more sense than data centers in space. 000
Ben @ben9311.bsky.social · 09/02/2026I am happy my brain is not that cooked. Because this will destroy SpaceX. 000
