iiinova — where your digital self keeps evolving

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A.L. likely @alvildalikely.bsky.social · 04/08/2026

I know I parked like an asshole, but I didn’t want to disturb the parking lot pigeon.

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Pizza Las Vegas @muyrando.bsky.social · 8h

I have this bag of hammers.

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Jenny Doesn’t Know @jennydoesntknow.bsky.social · 16h

Prescription strength cheesecake

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John Carpenter’s The Alex Nevil @thealexnevil.bsky.social · 22h

Life would have been so much easier if only I had understood the euphemisms in 80's and 90's music.

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lalalyds @lalalyds.bsky.social · 17h

If your childhood kitchen had decorative geese wearing blue bonnets, how's perimenopause going for you?

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BrujoLoco☠️🖤🏺 @patnspankme.bsky.social · 21h

I’m white but not “saves all of the corks from my wine bottles” white.

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Paul @grommit56.bsky.social · 19h

If you're a student of history you may know that back in medieval times it was Catherine the Clumsy who was credited with creating the Ladyfinger cookie. Sadly she was only able to make a few batches.

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ficklenuts is tired of this shit @ficklenuts.bsky.social · 22h

I woke up with the Dirty Dancing theme stuck in my head, and I have no idea why. But I'm having the time of my life

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Harbinger Of Mundane @harbingerofmundane.bsky.social · 22h

My safe word is liberty biberty…

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DaddyJew @daddyjew.bsky.social · 22h

*flicks cigarette* yeah i know the muffin man

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æmə's ghost @amazingama.bsky.social · 22h

I wish I were a blue jay, just flying around and screaming

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Jack Boot @jackboot.bsky.social · 07/10/2026

Sometimes, I accidentally make eye contact with the piñata during the beating and see into its soul. "Why? Why is this happening to me?" After that, the candy just tastes like ashes in my mouth.

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Paul @grommit56.bsky.social · 21h

The remote....Remo...The Clicker...The Bitzer...so many names for the remote control. But we all know it's real name for the average guy. It's my woobie.

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Marc @runoldman.bsky.social · 07/10/2026

Kale is a pretty tasty snack . . . . If you're a rabbit, who's out of Doritos.

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Skrill @friorox.bsky.social · 08/10/2026

If you call it a Booze Cruise, best believe we're gonna Booze.

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anton lestrange @hugemclarge.bsky.social · 08/10/2026

goth girl season is my favorite season of them all

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Skrill @friorox.bsky.social · 08/10/2026

I'm extremely doubtful about the chances of Greg Abbott and Ken Paxton losing in Texas. May the Gods of Dokken prove me wrong.

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Amy Vants to Suck Your Blood 🩸 @msfoxifurnasty.bsky.social · 08/10/2026

“babe you’re in for a wild ride,” i say as we undress each other, remembering all the googly eyes i pasted to my ass cheeks

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Jen @brokemycoccyx.bsky.social · 07/10/2026

They say it takes a village to raise a child.. I think adults could benefit from villages, too…

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Salty in the South @saltyinthesouth.bsky.social · 07/10/2026

“It says here you are 5’9” and 140 pounds. Is that still correct?” *guy at the DMV looking to fight

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Jane, actually @maidofbeans.bsky.social · 07/10/2026

Watch your step, I lost my marbles.

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Mr. Bea Arthur, Batshit Crazy™️ @steamymac.bsky.social · 07/10/2026

Someone threw a can of Alphagetti at me this morning so supper’s taken care of.

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Dak @dak.bsky.social · 07/10/2026

Whoever created forklifts dramatically overestimated the weight of forks

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Forrest Plump @nahyoudoit.bsky.social · 08/10/2026

LIFE HACK: if you want him to pay attention without having to repeat yourself, just angrily ask “did you hear me?” and boom undivided attention

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Mr. Bea Arthur, Batshit Crazy™️ @steamymac.bsky.social · 07/10/2026

*bleeding in a crumpled heap after falling down the stairs parkour

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Brosephine so scary 🎃 @joparkerbear.bsky.social · 08/10/2026

You can’t please all the people all the time, but a lot of people suck. I wouldn’t worry about it.

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Salty MacTavish @saltymactavish.bsky.social · 07/10/2026

Listened to a Cars song on the way home. It was just what I needed

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æmə's ghost @amazingama.bsky.social · 07/10/2026

I like that we can still be friends after seeing each other's genitals

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Harbinger Of Mundane @harbingerofmundane.bsky.social · 07/10/2026

The US really went to shit after they replaced Flo on Alice…

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Mr. Bea Arthur, Batshit Crazy™️ @steamymac.bsky.social · 07/10/2026

Looking forward to living out my days as a bog witch.

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SeaTea @tierno158.bsky.social · 06/10/2026

Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil and I am accruing Fitbit steps.

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æmə's ghost @amazingama.bsky.social · 07/10/2026

How old am I? Everything hurts is how old I am

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John Lyon @johnlyon.bsky.social · 07/10/2026

30-year-old: My knee hurts, but I don’t know why. Me: Aww, that’s cute. I remember when I thought pain had to have reasons.

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Skrill @friorox.bsky.social · 07/10/2026

All I know for certain is that I will never vacation at a lake.

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FᎪᎢ ᏩᎪNᎠᎪᏞF @sofarrsogud.bsky.social · 06/10/2026

The first person to open a store selling spare parts for planes was like 'remember, the customer is always Wright' omg I'm so sorry

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Dumb Beezie @dumbbeezie.bsky.social · 06/10/2026

I will come to your party as long as no one else is there

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Dumb Beezie @dumbbeezie.bsky.social · 05/10/2026

“You’ll never find another guy like me.” You promise?

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anton lestrange @hugemclarge.bsky.social · 06/10/2026

got a rare crack out of my back and now everything doesn't seem so hopeless

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Paul @grommit56.bsky.social · 06/10/2026

Got measured for height at a dr's appointment and came up with the same old 5'9". This can't be right as over the years I notice my legs getting longer. I know this by how much farther I have to reach to put my socks on.

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Amy Vants to Suck Your Blood 🩸 @msfoxifurnasty.bsky.social · 05/10/2026