Reposted by VirginiaTwin Dad @twinsurvivalist.bsky.social · 16/01/2026The inventor of the recorder should be forced to listen to a group of 100 5th graders playing Hot Cross Buns on the recorder for all of eternity. 26220
Reposted by Virginiastrange ranger @lithiumsucks.bsky.social · 16/01/2026Stop bleeding for people who never knew you were injured. 317073
Reposted by Virginialos 🦦 @los-los.bsky.social · 16/01/2026every like i give is now a peace prize, you’re welcome 715043
Reposted by VirginiaJim @jimstewart.bsky.social · 13/01/2026Not enough of you read cereal boxes as a kid eating breakfast, and it shows. 216360
Reposted by VirginiaIdle @hatesnicethings.bsky.social · 10/01/2026You could easily convince me the universe is an eight year old boy who keeps pulling on my pigtails because “he likes me.” 13712
Reposted by Virginiashow me your kitties @frickinferal.bsky.social · 13/03/2025The thing is I hardly ever fuck around but I’m always finding out. 526790
Reposted by Virginialos 🦦 @los-los.bsky.social · 01/10/2025If cats don’t want to be held like babies then why baby sized 25672214
Reposted by VirginiaJohn Lyon @johnlyon.bsky.social · 10/01/2026Let me shave your legs, baby. It'll be sexy. [later] They said to keep putting pressure on it till the ambulance gets here. 322268
Reposted by VirginiaJim @jimstewart.bsky.social · 05/08/2025Boss: "You're fired." Me: *turns in my gun and my badge* Boss: "You're a waiter where did you get those?" 11614159
Reposted by VirginiaLiving_in_the_rhyme_light @livingintherhyme.bsky.social · 12/11/2024“Damn it, that sounded way funnier in my head.” - me and every tweet I’ve ever written. 14460114
Reposted by VirginiaPot Shop Boo @potshopboy.bsky.social · 15/01/2026I say "wow, someone actually gave that person a driver's license" at least a dozen times a day. 03914
Reposted by VirginiaJames Damron @runswindows95.bsky.social · 12/01/2026Long story short, the morgue has a strict policy against playing "Is it cake?"... 36623
Reposted by Virginia🏴☠️ Jollyrobber 🏴☠️ @jollyrobber.bsky.social · 02/12/2025Pronounces plaid like laid 68340
Reposted by VirginiaShitposts In Tiaras @shitpostsintiaras.bsky.social · 16/01/2026If you're not cold then they're not cold and you don't even have to bring them inside 🏆👑 Congratulations @banish-all-hope.bsky.social from @jollyrobber.bsky.social 🏴☠️ 196
Virginia @banish-all-hope.bsky.social · 24/10/2025When I was a kid and imagined what the future would be like, I never thought it would involve plugging in my couch. 060
Reposted by VirginiaPhantom Limb @hyde85.bsky.social · 28/06/2025I know it's my battle, but, would you mind holding my sword for a bit. 0189
Reposted by VirginiaGeorgia the Explorer 🇨🇦 @georgiatheexplorer.bsky.social · 29/06/2025I need a burger with so many toppings and sauces that I look like I’ve licked my way out of a dumpster when I’m done 513042
Reposted by VirginiaWilbur72 @wilboo72.bsky.social · 07/07/2025I hope I die with dignity, because I certainly haven’t lived that way. 14620
Virginia @banish-all-hope.bsky.social · 07/07/2025I don't like the person I become when I clean. 2263
Reposted by VirginiaJake_Vig @jakevig.bsky.social · 15/04/2025The movies had us convinced that every villain was clever and brilliant and cunning. It turns out that stupid and hateful people are the most dangerous. 25973161
Reposted by VirginiaAmish Super Model @amishsupermodel.bsky.social · 14/03/2025It’s not the heat… It’s the stupidity. 210936
Reposted by VirginiaMs. Naomi the teacher @noirnuit.bsky.social · 14/03/2025I warned my cat about you 1123
Reposted by VirginiaDaisy @daisy91.bsky.social · 10/03/2025Work would be so much better if there were breaks where someone came in and played with my hair. 1017676
Reposted by VirginiaTortured (R)Soul @richiewils.bsky.social · 03/03/2025Most people don't understand why I have a survival kit already packed. I don't understand why anyone wouldn't have one. 021
Reposted by Virginia💜Purple Jedi💜 @thepurplejedi.bsky.social · 14/03/2025Someone has to make inspirational posts. Not me but someone. 34313
Reposted by VirginiaBigthinkingcap @bigthinkingcap.bsky.social · 18/02/2025and to think that I woke up from a coma for this shit 525697
Reposted by Virginiarichie @theregoesrichie.bsky.social · 28/02/2025my default response to anything is nap 611656
Reposted by Virginiaactually its fens monster @cringeunworthy.bsky.social · 07/02/2025*picking apart a blooming onion* ME: he loves me, he loves me not, he loves me... 118279
Reposted by VirginiaJames Damron @runswindows95.bsky.social · 06/03/2025Long story short, don't go into a ball pit after Taco Bell... 03517
Reposted by VirginiaJack @wakeupangry.bsky.social · 09/03/2025let’s call this one the Best Depression 18284101
Reposted by VirginiaFᎪᎢ ᏩᎪNᎠᎪᏞF @sofarrsogud.bsky.social · 08/03/2025[my attorney after our first day in court] leave the banjo at home tomorrow 827568
Reposted by Virginialos 🦦 @los-los.bsky.social · 08/03/2025Life is the quicksand they warned us about as kids. 18292117
Reposted by VirginiaTheciscokidder @theciscokidder.bsky.social · 27/02/2025If you pretend that you're erasing evidence of a murder while cleaning the bathroom, you'll do a better job and it's more fun! 641971469
Reposted by Virginiabacon popsicle 🧴 @gupton68.bsky.social · 06/03/2025Medusa: *taking a selfie* goddammit! 2243125
