iiinova — where your digital self keeps evolving

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more mr. spice guy @juniorhoncho.bsky.social · 27/09/2026

TONY HINCHCLIFFE: how's everybody doing tonight? wow, seeing some different races in the crowd huh? couple genders too. what else. probably some gay dudes. uhh i THINK we all know how all of those are. ok thanks so much you guys have been great! please watch my dozens of upcoming netflix specials!!

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underscoredan @underscoredan.bsky.social · 22/09/2026

the people responsible for this should be put to death btw

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Ben Collins @bencollins.bsky.social · 18/09/2026

*rummaging for bread under an overpass* at least my hypothetical 7-year-old will never stare down a knuckleball thrown by a trans girl

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The Onion @theonion.com · 16/09/2026

Gas Station Price Sign Using Scientific Notation

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Matt Bors @mattbors.bsky.social · 14/09/2026

It was exactly ten years ago today, on my 33rd birthday, that I posted this comic online.

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@ratlimit @ratlimit.bsky.social · 13/09/2026

I think this was ultimately the right move.

The passengers (excluding the hijackers) and crew on board Flight 93 were nominated for the Congressional Gold Medal on September 19, 2001.

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merr-itt came from outer space @merrittk.com · 30/07/2023

Doctor: Great job, you've been born. You're a natural. Now, press [A] repeatedly to cry. Right, just like that. As a baby, crying is one of your most useful abilities

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UncleofJamiroquai @jessefarrar.com · 10/09/2026

scammers are everywhere. on youtube selling your data to crackheads, and on bluesky lying about needing rent money so they can get truckfuls of sodas delivered. some scammers do get popped on a college campus though. tough business!

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The Onion @theonion.com · 29/08/2026

Christ Does Soft Return To Gauge Interest theonion.com/christ-does-soft-retur…

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josh (oldfriend99) @oldfriend99.bsky.social · 25/08/2026

Dolly Parton taught me it was ok to be universally beloved

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The Onion @theonion.com · 24/08/2026

Guy Who Sucks At Being A Person Sees Huge Potential In AI theonion.com/guy-who-sucks-at-being…

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onion person @junlper.beer · 24/08/2026

i can’t believe trump said this

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Robert Komaniecki @komaniecki.bsky.social · 21/08/2026

We are all dogs locked in god’s hot car

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The Onion @theonion.com · 21/08/2026

Every Commercial On ESPN Past Midnight Just Straight-Up Telling Viewers They Have Prostate Cancer

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Peter @notalawyer.bsky.social · 12/08/2026

must’ve been terrible to date AOC as a regular man because one minute you’re dating a bartender who’s a bit out of your league and the next there are tabloid stories like “you’re not gonna believe how ugly this guy is”

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rob @ok-but-still.bsky.social · 04/08/2026

you have to have a 90db, poisonous AI data center next to your town's elementary school so that your boss's boss can generate a podcast that talks about him

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Jordan aka Jirdan @slclunk.com · 25/07/2026

If I die in anyway that makes news, please don’t write about me like this.

Outside the military, Fletcher said Feehan enjoyed building LEGO sets, cheering for the Atlanta Falcons, using Dr. Squatch soap, drinking Shatto Milk from Missouri and traveling.

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The Onion @theonion.com · 20/07/2026

Bat Dog Clearly Pregnant

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Lupita Nihongo @otsumamiboy.blacksky.app · 17/09/2025

As an aside every frame of Gaston is absolutely hilarious. The animators were frying his shit. They hated him! Shame this is the only type of guy it's okay to be now.

Gaston checking his hair in a mirror while holding a huge blunderbuss towards the reflection of his face

Gaston holding a book sideways in an attempt to read it was Belle looks on unimpressed but also impressed because damn

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The Onion @theonion.com · 16/07/2026

“So help me God, if I get bronchitis right before my vacation because this guy hacking up a lung is not, in fact, succumbing to pharyngeal cancer, I’m gonna lose my shit,” said Derek Lawson

theonion.com

Guy Violently Coughing On Bus Better Just Have Throat Cancer

CHICAGO—Watching in horror as the wheezing man hacked directly into his palm before grabbing the nearest handrail, local bus passenger Derek Lawson told reporters Thursday that the guy violently cough...

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leon @leyawn.bsky.social · 15/07/2026

my new idea for time zones. whenever you wake up, that's 9 am. and whenever you go to sleep that's 9 pm. time is no longer a fixed point. you can follow the sun or you can follow your heart. the choice is yours

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Sridhar Ramesh @radishharmers.bsky.social · 12/07/2026

I don't think anyone should kill anyone. There's no need for that. However, I do think some people should die.

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Sridhar Ramesh @radishharmers.bsky.social · 12/07/2026

It's okay for me to joke about Lindsey Graham being gay. I am a member of the community. I am homophobic.

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James Hell Brooks @kleinman.bsky.social · 04/07/2026

[going up to Taylor Swift's dad] fuckin, thanks for the open bar man, you must be so proud

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The Onion @theonion.com · 03/07/2026

Scientists Successfully Teach Gorilla It Will Die Someday

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Kurbs @kkurbs.bsky.social · 10/06/2026

Please Use AI

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ghost of john gode @ghostofjohngode.bsky.social · 09/06/2026

dolan should invite benjamin netanyahu to game 4

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Ben Goggin @bengoggin.bsky.social · 10/05/2026

NEW: ChatGPT advised the FSU shooter that a mass shooting would get more attention from media if it involved several children, according to a new lawsuit against OpenAI www.nbcnews.com/news/us-news...

nbcnews.com

OpenAI sued over ChatGPT’s alleged role in guiding FSU shooter

The lawsuit claims that the shooter carried out his attack using instructions and advice provided by ChatGPT.

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pixelatedboat aka “mr bluesky” @pixelatedboat.bsky.social · 28/04/2026

Me: I voted for Donald Trump because I had him confused with that other guy. Donald Duck. NYT reporter: Are you sure you want me to print that next to your real name and a drawing of you? Me: Yes.

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more mr. spice guy @juniorhoncho.bsky.social · 27/07/2025

jim carrey improvised all the parts in The Mask when stanley ipkiss puts on the mask and starts acting crazy. in the script it's just a normal mask

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Tim Heidecker @timheidecker.bsky.social · 20/04/2026

Hey everybody! I am taking the helm of this classic American institution with @theonion.com and want to know what you fine folks would like to see from us.

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Chris Paxton @cpaxton.bsky.social · 17/04/2026

We all have days like this

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Mike.⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ @dumbmike.bsky.social · 17/04/2026

DR. ROBBY: I am going to kill myself tonight. ME: (doing a full spread eagle split on the hospital bed while he yanks thousands of yards of tinsel out of my dick) Because of this? DR. ROBBY: No. Not because of this. DR. ROBBY: (quietly) But it doesn't help.

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Christine Nangle @nanglish.bsky.social · 15/04/2026

Dammit it’s already happening

My Allbirds shoes telling me to kill myself

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Chris Ingraham @cingraham.bsky.social · 12/04/2026

Current status of the Strait of Hormuz dispute

In Bruges scene where Colin Farrell is pointing a gun at his head and Brendon Gleeson is also pointing a gun at Colin Farrell's head

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Norm Charlatan @normcharlatan.bsky.social · 11/04/2026

One of the Artemis astronauts stood up immediately after splashdown and started collecting his carryon bags even though he was seated in the back row of the capsule.

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Brad @ohmyitsbrad.bsky.social · 08/04/2026

At least we get to watch The Masters

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Mike.⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ @dumbmike.bsky.social · 07/04/2026

A great bit: doing a big cowboy walk up to the urinal, letting out a huge sigh of relief as you piss down your pant leg and all over your shoes. Never even tried to unzip.

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Michael @fleerultra.bsky.social · 06/02/2025

god, the last few days, i don’t think ive ever related to a movie character more than this one in this scene

Ethan Hawke in First Reformed, in a priest’s robes, looking anguished and panicked, saying “Well, somebody has to do something!”

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Gourmet Spud @gourmetspud.bsky.social · 04/04/2026

*Doing Tom Cochrane at karaoke but I forgot my reading glasses*

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