iiinova — where your digital self keeps evolving

korpisworld @kwkorpi.bsky.social · 48m

I bought a cursed antique mirror. I look terrible in it, so the curse appears to be working.

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Μαρια Κιτρινη @greekheanen.bsky.social · 29/09/2026

I talked to some kids about encyclopedias and they thought I was having a stroke

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Jack Boot @jackboot.bsky.social · 18h

Sometimes my wife catches me in the kitchen whispering a version of the argument we just had but with me winning.

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sweetie π @sixfeetofcandy.bsky.social · 20h

in the avengers: doomsday movie all hope is lost and evil reigns supreme oh wait no this is the news

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Dead Reckons @gregreckons.bsky.social · 02/10/2026

Her: You need to work on your communication skills. Me: 👍

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Mr. Bea Arthur, Batshit Crazy™️ @steamymac.bsky.social · 14h

*from the ditch I’m doing great.

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korpisworld @kwkorpi.bsky.social · 17h

I told the fortune teller I didn’t believe in psychics. She said, “I know.”

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korpisworld @kwkorpi.bsky.social · 21h

The nice thing about being possessed is somebody finally has a plan for me.

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korpisworld @kwkorpi.bsky.social · 22h

A ghost tried to scare me by turning the lights off. I turned them back on. We did this four times.

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Uncle Kermit @unclekermit.bsky.social · 01/10/2026

I play in traffic all the time. It's not just because you suggested it.

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𝔏𝔦𝔳𝔢 𝔏𝔞𝔲𝔤𝔥 𝔏𝔬𝔞𝔱𝔥𝔢 @fleurkenstein.bsky.social · 01/10/2026

Broke up with my medieval bf because his lasagna layers were made out of pigeon wings

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Marly @verbsrproudest.bsky.social · 01/10/2026

The Little Engine That Could But Didn’t Want To Deal With It Until Monday

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Marly @verbsrproudest.bsky.social · 02/10/2026

I mean I’ve been called worse. But Cookie Lady is not the gritty nickname I envisioned for myself.

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Wilbur72 @wilboo72.bsky.social · 01/10/2026

It takes a lot of energy to type the word lackadaisical. Something is amiss.

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Marc @runoldman.bsky.social · 30/09/2026

Think about it . . . If love didn't hurt so much, it wouldn't be called love . . . it would be called pepperoni pizza.

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korpisworld @kwkorpi.bsky.social · 01/10/2026

I just made a vampire self-conscious by asking if he always talks like that.

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korpisworld @kwkorpi.bsky.social · 01/10/2026

I have an excellent memory for things that never happened.

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Lizzy @stonedeva.bsky.social · 01/10/2026

The reason I'm not in prison can be chalked up to pure lack of motivation.

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Shade 5 @shade5.bsky.social · 01/10/2026

Maybe I've been hard on life

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Dumb Beezie @dumbbeezie.bsky.social · 01/10/2026

Not everyone will like you. Some people will really really like you and you’ll need a cop to make them go away

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korpisworld @kwkorpi.bsky.social · 01/10/2026

I like my timeline to be mostly my own posts, and I appreciate you guys doing your part by not posting anything I want to repost. It takes a village.

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korpisworld @kwkorpi.bsky.social · 01/10/2026

We’re all gonna die someday. -Kasey Chambers Finally, a country song with a five-year plan.

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korpisworld @kwkorpi.bsky.social · 01/10/2026

My company is offering free flu shots. I clicked the foreign link to sign up and it asked me for my username and password. Anyway, I’ll be taking some flu sick days this year, Mr. CFO: Password shmassword!

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John Carpenter’s The Alex Nevil @thealexnevil.bsky.social · 01/10/2026

Me, sitting alone in a room with my thoughts Thoughts: Could you maybe sit somewhere else?

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sweetie π @sixfeetofcandy.bsky.social · 01/10/2026

writing my memoirs on old klondike bar wrappers

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Marly @verbsrproudest.bsky.social · 29/09/2026

My cats are looking at me with little sneers like, "Your algebra can't help you now."

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headless horseDan @etbeeegood.bsky.social · 30/09/2026

*death metal guy flipping thru medical journal for song names ooh, Eyestalk Ablation perfect

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DaddyJew @daddyjew.bsky.social · 01/10/2026

you still haven’t accepted my friend request, your honor

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Edmonds Scanner @edmondsscanner.bsky.social · 01/10/2026

What's your retirement plan? 1. coffee shop curmudgeon 2. vengeful sea witch 3. sentient moss mound 4. foggy wanderer

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korpisworld @kwkorpi.bsky.social · 01/10/2026

I asked the hotel clerk for a wake-up call. She said, “You’re 52 and still don’t know what you want to do with your life. Checkout’s at eleven.”

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korpisworld @kwkorpi.bsky.social · 01/10/2026

You can’t tickle yourself because your brain knows exactly what’s coming. Same reason my wife doesn’t laugh when I tell her my jokes.

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korpisworld @kwkorpi.bsky.social · 01/10/2026

We have officially entered the month when every food product is legally permitted to taste like a candle.

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korpisworld @kwkorpi.bsky.social · 30/09/2026

Liking my posts is like paying for diesel. Nobody wants to do it, but apparently this is what it costs to keep things moving.

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korpisworld @kwkorpi.bsky.social · 30/09/2026

With all these advances in AI, social media should have a filter that only shows me things I find funny. We’ve spent enough time finding out what you “other” people find funny.

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korpisworld @kwkorpi.bsky.social · 30/09/2026

I’ve decided to start posting pictures of my breasts to get more followers. $3.99 a pound at the local grocery store.

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korpisworld @kwkorpi.bsky.social · 30/09/2026

My strategy has always been quantity over quality. It really maximizes the number of disappointments.

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korpisworld @kwkorpi.bsky.social · 30/09/2026

Just so y’all know, I’m on all the other apps too. I just check Bluesky first so I can be disappointed in an orderly fashion.

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korpisworld @kwkorpi.bsky.social · 30/09/2026

*follow me* [leads you off a cliff]

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korpisworld @kwkorpi.bsky.social · 30/09/2026

As a man, I’m getting to the age where I could really use the support of a bra. Fortunately, I’m already wearing the panties.

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korpisworld @kwkorpi.bsky.social · 30/09/2026

There should be a social media app where you post something and it immediately gives you 4,000 fake likes from people who don’t exist. Dopamine is dopamine.

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korpisworld @kwkorpi.bsky.social · 30/09/2026

I write the jokes. You press the heart. This system only works if everyone does their job.

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korpisworld @kwkorpi.bsky.social · 30/09/2026

Whoever said “nothing lasts forever” clearly underestimated plastic. And by plastic, I mean credit card debt.

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korpisworld @kwkorpi.bsky.social · 30/09/2026

I feel like wars could be avoided if countries didn’t keep involving the military.

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korpisworld @kwkorpi.bsky.social · 30/09/2026

Nothing inspires confidence in modern medicine like walking into the doctor’s office with a pharmaceutical request you got during Wheel of Fortune.

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korpisworld @kwkorpi.bsky.social · 30/09/2026

I feel like wars could be avoided if countries didn’t keep involving the military.

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korpisworld @kwkorpi.bsky.social · 30/09/2026

My belt has been quietly documenting my decline for years.

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Dropped Mike @rebrafsim.bsky.social · 30/09/2026

people who say “I couldn’t care less” just aren’t trying hard enough

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Kellalena @kellalena.bsky.social · 30/09/2026

If you don’t like my cargo pants, let me check the pockets to see if I care

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Dropped Mike @rebrafsim.bsky.social · 04/02/2025

mob boss: *sneering* take care of him me: sure thing, boss *brings him home, raises him as my own, cries as he leaves for college*

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Jon Bois @jonbois.bsky.social · 29/09/2026

i wish baseball teams could resolve their differences without resorting to baseball

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