iiinova — where your digital self keeps evolving

PieGuy @ilovepie84.bsky.social · 14/10/2025

I’m making a movie about an elderly gentleman getting dentures and I’m going to call it “No crunchy for old men”

89523

PieGuy @ilovepie84.bsky.social · 09/10/2025

Sorry I haven’t been on lately. I was busy trying to open a produce bag for my apples

719854

PieGuy @ilovepie84.bsky.social · 27/08/2025

People: nice jeep, here’s a duck Winter: nice smile, here’s seasonal depression

16321

PieGuy @ilovepie84.bsky.social · 10/08/2025

Convinced my ex to get bangs before we broke up so that I’d find someone new first.

918535

Reposted by PieGuy

Jason, ex Inferis @benedictsred.bsky.social · 09/08/2025

Oh, you’re an old soul? Name 3 of your children who died of consumption

1931273

Reposted by PieGuy

andy vs. @im-all-id.me · 09/08/2025

My reaction to citronella suggests that I may in fact be part mosquito

1154089

Reposted by PieGuy

BEAVE @beaveinflow.bsky.social · 08/08/2025

I only watch South Park for the american politics updates. it’s like the news but honest.

141597237

Reposted by PieGuy

BEAVE @beaveinflow.bsky.social · 09/08/2025

Sorry i’m late, my morning fart ritual ran long.

814337

Reposted by PieGuy

Jason, ex Inferis @benedictsred.bsky.social · 09/08/2025

what i mean when i say ima "skedaddle"

A child running from what I assume is responsibility

825860

Reposted by PieGuy

Little Greenis @durtmchurtt.bsky.social · 10/08/2025

When you see nine birds together that’s a flock 9.

095

Reposted by PieGuy

mean things I say to myself @meantomyself.bsky.social · 10/08/2025

Step 1: Watch all seasons of The Great British Sewing Bee Step 2: Attempt to alter every garment in my wardrobe to make it custom fitted and special Step 3: ? Step 4: Wear barrel

411320

Reposted by PieGuy

Ennui Doofen @ennuidoofen.bsky.social · 03/06/2024

Correction: there are no butterflies in my stomach- I hardly ever even nibble on butterflies

1120775

PieGuy @ilovepie84.bsky.social · 08/08/2025

If you look at the shape of a vagina it makes sense that babies are born in the shape of a pancake” -Flat Birthers

414025

Reposted by PieGuy

Dak @dak.bsky.social · 04/08/2025

Show dominance by clapping as the plane takes off.

811120

Reposted by PieGuy

Jason, ex Inferis @benedictsred.bsky.social · 30/07/2025

I love that courtroom sketches are still a thing. Leaves open the possibility that a smurf or two was there

218952

Reposted by PieGuy

Jason, ex Inferis @benedictsred.bsky.social · 30/07/2025

At a funeral saying deadass instead of amen

13511126

Reposted by PieGuy

TheSpookioPhi 🎃 @thesociophi.bsky.social · 30/07/2025

I ordered a cheese plate for dessert last night, which speaks directly to my outstanding and honourable quality of character, IMO.

2295

Reposted by PieGuy

TheSpookioPhi 🎃 @thesociophi.bsky.social · 30/07/2025

You can never stand backward on stairs.

88722

Reposted by PieGuy

Jenny and the Bets 💕 @bets.bsky.social · 29/07/2025

It was probably a dog who invented the fact that they can’t eat raisins.

57519

Reposted by PieGuy

BEAVE @beaveinflow.bsky.social · 13/11/2024

My boyfriend got kicked off the cyber truck waiting list for having sex.

762744418

Reposted by PieGuy

Granite Man @granitedhuine.bsky.social · 31/07/2025

Me: *makes a mental note* Also me: *immediately forgets mental note*

03714

Reposted by PieGuy

BEAVE @beaveinflow.bsky.social · 31/07/2025

Absolutely no one: Cats: might I suggest the butthole-in-your-face pairing with breakfast this morning?

729462

PieGuy @ilovepie84.bsky.social · 26/07/2025

Sure filling my neighbours gas tank with water is bad But dumping 75 bags of pancake mix into my neighbours pool is batter

1331944

Reposted by PieGuy

Silly Goose PhD DDS @therealjweezy.bsky.social · 25/07/2025

I’m just like any other sleep deprived girl, I blink one eye at a time

081

Reposted by PieGuy

A Shot of Steve™ ⚡️ @stevekoehler22.bsky.social · 25/07/2025

New breakfast food …. Apocalyp-Tarts

12714

PieGuy @ilovepie84.bsky.social · 22/07/2025

My kid found a sick eagle and asked me to help it Son: have you done this before or are you just going to....WING IT?!? Me: no…..dummy, I can't lawfully touch him it's...ILL- EAGLE

1929027

Reposted by PieGuy

TheSpookioPhi 🎃 @thesociophi.bsky.social · 15/12/2024

People often overlook the fact that gingerbread men live inside gingerbread houses that are effectively made of their own skin. Those sadistic mother fuckers sit at their dinner tables on gingerbread chairs, knowing their gingerbread friends likely died to build and furnish the place. It’s sick.

1217436

Reposted by PieGuy

BEAVE @beaveinflow.bsky.social · 22/07/2025

I’m living chip bag to chip bag.

1233193

Reposted by PieGuy

BEAVE @beaveinflow.bsky.social · 22/07/2025

Applying for remote jobs just to escape the office snacks that keep bullying me into eating them.

713626

Reposted by PieGuy

andy vs. @im-all-id.me · 21/07/2025

You become an adult the first time you go to the beach and are driven to madness by the sand

1636972

Reposted by PieGuy

Jinothy @jinah.bsky.social · 21/07/2025

Feeling good, might feign ignorance for a joke and wait for the replies to change that

27623

Reposted by PieGuy

𝙱𝚊𝚋𝚎 𝚁𝚞𝚝𝚑𝚕𝚎𝚜𝚜 @unfitz.bsky.social · 21/07/2025

Flat earthers will have brain surgery to turn their hemispheres into hemisphlats.

37120

Reposted by PieGuy

jordan [ham] @nursemurderer.bsky.social · 22/07/2025

“it was the best of times, it was the worst of times,” I say as I throw away all the vegetables I had delivered last week to make room for the vegetables I just had delivered

416239

Reposted by PieGuy

Theciscokidder @theciscokidder.bsky.social · 21/07/2025

*wife getting ready for work* Me: Is it going to fuck you up if I take a 40 min shit?

722163

Reposted by PieGuy

mean things I say to myself @meantomyself.bsky.social · 21/07/2025

Wild that detectives and trained dogs can find human remains in the wilderness based on scant clues but my husband and kids can't find the ketchup in the fridge in the same spot it always is

2031556

Reposted by PieGuy

Ennui Doofen @ennuidoofen.bsky.social · 27/08/2023