iiinova — where your digital self keeps evolving

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Gef the Toking Mongoose @geftokingmongoose.bsky.social · 12/05/2025

do you think that Pharrell's hat got bigger and bigger till it swallowed him up inside

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Kalvin the Reindeer @kalvinmacleod.bsky.social · 12/05/2025

I guess we can start calling them taroffs again.

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DasAutoCitron @dasautocitron.bsky.social · 12/05/2025

Are my fellow Millennials truly so uncultured, they don't know our equivalent of 'Twelve Days of Christmas' is .. 'Because I Got High'?

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Gef the Toking Mongoose @geftokingmongoose.bsky.social · 12/05/2025

me watching weekend at bernies: man I wish I was dead

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al-boo @captainacabairbud.myatproto.social · 12/05/2025

i emailed your boss screenshots of you dunking on my parasocial best friend’s absolute dogshit takes about star wars please respond

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cult “spooky” papa @cult-papa.com · 12/05/2025

i can't make room for a midlife crisis i haven't even finished my being alive crisis

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BAJA BLAST BLAINE @shrekromancer.gay · 12/05/2025

my god-given talent is losing items in a one bedroom apartment

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walruslifestyle @walruslifestyle.bsky.social · 12/05/2025

thinking about that time i pulled an ab muscle trying to win a stuffed crab from a crane machine

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weeder @weeder.bsky.social · 12/05/2025

General strike but everybody gets completely sober. That will show em, c'mon everybody!

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DasAutoCitron @dasautocitron.bsky.social · 12/05/2025

Y'know something? Trying to watch a Mehdi Hassan-interview while having the mother of all panic attacks is a shit idea.

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DasAutoCitron @dasautocitron.bsky.social · 10/05/2025

Fine. They needed a new pope. But couldn't they have chosen someone other than the guy who's using his fucking zodiac sign, like some basic Millennial white bitch.

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DasAutoCitron @dasautocitron.bsky.social · 06/05/2025

I had to go on Facebook for something. Now I hate everything.

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Cooperstreaming ♿️ @cooperstreaming.bsky.social · 06/05/2025

This remains one of my all-time favorite Twitter interactions.

A screenshot of a tweet and a quote tweet. The original tweet is from an account called did I upset you who is replying to an unseen post by Cooperstreaming. It says You're disabled. Cooper streaming quote tweets with a picture of herself lying on her side with her long brown hair curled and flowing down past the frame of the photo, meaning up on her elbow with a camping cup in her hand and reusable straw in her mouth, with a wide smile as if she is laughing.

Above the photo she writes, Oh my God. What? Call the New York times.

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DasAutoCitron @dasautocitron.bsky.social · 06/05/2025

A co-worker wanted me to watch The Dentist. If the dog dies, I'm not watching that movie!

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DasAutoCitron @dasautocitron.bsky.social · 05/05/2025

He knows what Rome is. Rome is the mob. Conjure magic for them, and they're distracted. Take away their freedom, and still they roar. The beating heart of Rome is not the marble of the senate. It's the sand of the Colosseum He'll bring them death. And they'll love him for it

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Dr. Bucky Isotope, PhD, BOFA @buckyisotope.bsky.social · 02/05/2025

This is what happens when you defund public media

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Jason, ex Inferis @benedictsred.bsky.social · 02/05/2025

Bought a second virginity on Temu

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DasAutoCitron @dasautocitron.bsky.social · 02/05/2025

If you're driving an Audi from 2006 while wearing a backwards baseball cap, I'm going to assume that your gearshift and at least one of your seats is being held together by duct tape.

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DasAutoCitron @dasautocitron.bsky.social · 29/04/2025

Farrier is the single most properly masculine job where you have to wear a skirt that's somehow also assless chaps.

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NY Times Pitchbot @nytpitchbot.bsky.social · 28/04/2025

In an effort to embrace modern technology, the Vatican is replacing the in-person Conclave it has historically used to select a new pope with an insecure Signal group chat.

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BEAVE @beaveinflow.bsky.social · 28/04/2025

Saying ‘see ya, wouldn’t wanna be ya’ was the 90s version of telling someone to go die mad about it.

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DasAutoCitron @dasautocitron.bsky.social · 28/04/2025

Could you people tone down the moroning? It's Monday! I don't have the energy to hate you like you deserve.

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Mass Dude @massdude.bsky.social · 28/04/2025

Only having good weather during the work week is so on brand for 2025.

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drewtoothpaste @drewtoothpaste.bsky.social · 28/04/2025

when the ipod came out it was so wild. little box in your pocket that you could save files onto and had a built in mp3 player. they'll put in the history books that it only took like 20 years for it to evolve into a computer that lies to you. lol no i'm just playing, we won't have history books soon

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Ahhhhh @nerdjpg.com · 28/04/2025

Plot twist: we are all just beings in the history simulation of the global communists that won years ago to show their people what capitalism winning the 20th century would be like

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al-boo @captainacabairbud.myatproto.social · 28/04/2025

strolling over to your girl with a grin, revealing a grill that is just all the silver fillings i got from cavities as a kid

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Brendel @brendelbored.bsky.social · 28/04/2025

I’m not going to sit here and say that Star Trek 5 is a good movie but the origin of it with Shatner watching televangelists and asking “why would God need me to send *you* money?” is a real classic Star Trek plot and theres a couple moments where it gets close to being really interesting

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Cooperstreaming ♿️ @cooperstreaming.bsky.social · 28/04/2025

It's really weird watching someone go to the gas station, buy a drum of gasoline, take it home, pour it around the perimeter of the house, douse all of their belongings, stuff every vacant corner with kindling, light a match, then go online & cry about how their house is on fire Here's my gfm 😭🔥🙏💰

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𝕊𝕦𝕟𝕕𝕒𝕖 𝔾𝕦𝕣𝕝 @sundaedivine.lol · 28/04/2025

Allowing Peter Navarro to decide our trade policies is like letting a dog pilot a helicopter.

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lauren @lauren.rotatingsandwiches.com · 28/04/2025

since i'm a fundamentally boring person who doesn't do drugs or buy guns, i've never gotten to participate in a black market. so i am hopeful tariffs mean i can get a small thrill out of cryptically saying "Oh, I've got a guy for that" when i mean toothpaste and tide pods

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Ryan Nanni @celebrityhottub.bsky.social · 28/04/2025

“My hunger for information is astonishing” I whisper as I peruse the Wikipedia page for the movie Congo instead of emptying the dishwasher

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soul nate @mnateshyamalan.bsky.social · 28/04/2025

the poor foster dog is terrified of the coffee grinder. i feel the need to explain. “these are the beans you have to drink when you are a person,” i say. “sometimes things are very very bad. but then the beans happen and it is good.” i can tell she understands

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Uncle Duke @uncleduke1969.bsky.social · 28/04/2025

Maintenance, Scheduled Maintenance.

Train status sign reads “007 Not in Service.”

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Nappy Dolemite @nappydolemite.bsky.social · 28/04/2025

My favorite part of dieting is having the scale not move after being at a deficit for three weeks

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DasAutoCitron @dasautocitron.bsky.social · 28/04/2025

Starting a club called Monday, You Cunt-Bucket! There will be coffee-cocktails, boss-bitching and bagel bites. Find us by three-storey bouncy castle blasting Motörhead at dangerous decibels.

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dawn of the debb @debbshock.blue · 05/04/2025

if I can get just one child to sing a song with "dangling saggy testicles" instead of the real song lyrics, my job here is done

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weeder @weeder.bsky.social · 05/04/2025

Affixing some toilet paper to my shoe before returning to the group so I am not perceived as a threat

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Haunter @holybible.bsky.social · 05/04/2025

I actually dont exaggerate that much on here anymore bc my life is so fucking stupid i dont have to

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DasAutoCitron @dasautocitron.bsky.social · 05/04/2025

"I KNOW, Sharon! Now, will you quit body shaming me, and come help widen this doorway!"

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Travis comma bitch @prof-hinkley.bsky.social · 05/04/2025

"I'm here too" - other guy who lives in a pineapple under the sea

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