iiinova — where your digital self keeps evolving

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Pops @pops131.bsky.social · 27/09/2026

One Squashed Chihuahua. 🤣😂🤣

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Blair Loudly @blairloudly.bsky.social · 28/09/2026

why are you eating all those french fries [me] you told me to hydrate what [me] car-bo-hydrate its right there in the word

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rebar mcentire? @rebarmcentire.bsky.social · 26/09/2026

your hands slip around my waist, I look up into your eyes, you brush a lock of hair behind my ear, I let out the most putrid fart known to man, we both start gagging and decide it's time to leave IKEA

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murphmama.bsky.social @murphmama.bsky.social · 26/09/2026

In 7th grade, Missy loved to braid my hair during P.E. She went on to become a porn star, I went on to have long hair.

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Daisy @daisy91.bsky.social · 17/09/2026

A level of narcissism only your mom and serial killers can love

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Grant Tanaka @granttanaka.bsky.social · 22/09/2026

Boss: [asks me to do something] Me: [wonders how beyonce would do it] Boss: STOP WONDERING ABOUT HOW BEYONCE WOULD DO IT

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'dro🐰 @clowndro.bsky.social · 22/09/2026

Psyching myself up for a Costco run by repeatedly punching myself in the groin

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Trish K @tkaz99.bsky.social · 22/09/2026

❤️❤️❤️

ADHDers that take on life without medication:

Well, first of all, with caffeine and anger, all things are possible, so jot that down.

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dan mentos @danmentos.com · 22/09/2026

[job interview] interviewer: so god killed all your kids? job: that's right

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💙🪄 Keep Rising 🪄💙 @keeprising.bsky.social · 22/09/2026

💚 happy fall y'all 🍁💛🤎🧡🍂 #dogsky #dogs #love 💛🤎🧡

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'dro🐰 @clowndro.bsky.social · 22/09/2026

I yearn for the future where raccoons are as common as domesticated pets as cats are today

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mave @mave.bsky.social · 17/08/2026

Is this the day I begin flouncing

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mave @mave.bsky.social · 28/08/2026

A partial lunar eclipse is good for when you only feel like turning into half a werewolf

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Sandra Newman @sannewman.bsky.social · 31/08/2026

Dance like no one's watching. No, not like that. Wrong. More spontaneous.

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mave @mave.bsky.social · 02/09/2026

Taking the afternoon off to sink gently into a soothing tub of gazpacho

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mave @mave.bsky.social · 03/09/2026

*pops out of a giant pumpkin* did someone say fresh fall finds?

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mave @mave.bsky.social · 03/09/2026

Medication ad says side effects include unusual urges. What, like suddenly wanting to go waterskiing?

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Gretchen @wokkax3.bsky.social · 03/09/2026

As far as I can tell, hummingbirds use 80% of their energy trying to chase each other away from the feeder

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Ygrene @ygrene.bsky.social · 30/09/2024

i pause in the middle of the street fight, only to eat a handful of candy corn and then return to fighting, noticeably more powerful

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mave @mave.bsky.social · 14/09/2026

Was thinking I’d like to be pushed in a stroller except lying down and then realized that would be a gurney

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mindflakes @mindflakes.bsky.social · 14/09/2026

Switched on the kitchen light and could've sworn I saw a horse scurry under the fridge

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mave @mave.bsky.social · 22/09/2026

You’ll feel a deep and abiding sense of peace when you realize that it’s not things that make you happy. It’s stuff

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mave @mave.bsky.social · 08/09/2026

No one is coming to save you. However, someone is coming to stand in front of what you want to look at in the grocery store

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'dro🐰 @clowndro.bsky.social · 22/09/2026

When I watch live sports on TV I like to turn the volume up loud enough that after awhile I think I'm there

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Blue sky nice ghost @rajandelman.bsky.social · 21/09/2026

Do you ever read a series of words

Includes exclusive Hanks for our troops pumpkin brulee

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Salty MacTavish @saltymactavish.bsky.social · 19/09/2026

You say the foundation of our civilization is falling apart like that’s a bad thing

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raindro g @raindro.bsky.social · 15/09/2026

“a watched pot doesn’t boil” yes it does you impatient fuck

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JP @jpbrammer.bsky.social · 19/09/2026

sometimes I get bored and cancel myself on Threads by saying whatever the fuck

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Frovo @frovo.bsky.social · 19/09/2026

any pants can be sweatpants if i wear them for 5 minutes

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Marly @verbsrproudest.bsky.social · 19/09/2026

I bought Mom some fudge to surprise her but the heat index outside is like 105 degrees so it melted on the way to her house. I guess technically I surprised her with chocolate soup.

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Dark Deeny(they\them) @darkdeeny.bsky.social · 18/09/2026

The posting of queer porn will continue until morale improves and the SWers of the world are given long range strategic bombing capabilities

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Blair Loudly @blairloudly.bsky.social · 19/09/2026

i contain multitudes oops sorry autocorrect i contain mildew

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cait (and adonis) @cait.bsky.social · 16/09/2026

I keep seeing videos of a guy who catches crabs and lobsters, cracks all the barnacles off them, puts a shrimp in their claws and throws them back. can you imagine. abducted by aliens but they just give you a spa day and hand you two hot dogs and let you go

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🅿️rofessor Kiosk 💊 @professorkiosk.wtf · 16/09/2026

what if we kissed at the fuck shed

A metal shed with the words “FUCK SHED” written on it with spray paint. There’s also a giant dick drawn on the side of the shed.

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🅿️rofessor Kiosk 💊 @professorkiosk.wtf · 16/09/2026

sorry every unit in the building is already octopied

A picture of the COMMERCE BUILDING in Galveston with a giant inflatable octopus hanging out of one of the windows. Its tentacles are also coming out of six other windows along the front and side of the building.

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Blair Loudly @blairloudly.bsky.social · 16/09/2026

[visibly livid] hi your ad said this sale was going to be pandemonium but there is not a single panda anywhere

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'dro🐰 @clowndro.bsky.social · 16/09/2026

I have seen enough and now I would like to be less informed

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Kip Conlon @kipconlon.bsky.social · 15/09/2026

At some point on this journey I have grown tired of proving I am not a robot.

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mindflakes @mindflakes.bsky.social · 15/09/2026

Telling my coworkers about bluesky but they're all just staring at me in confusion. "But bluesky doesn't exist any more... it burned to the ground nearly 100 years ago..." I go to check my phone but there's just sand in my pocket

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Jason, ex Inferis @benedictsred.bsky.social · 14/09/2026

I’ve been getting really into performative hiking lately

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Jason, ex Inferis @benedictsred.bsky.social · 14/09/2026

*dating after 60* Get on my lawn!

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Ygrene @ygrene.bsky.social · 14/09/2026

one of the cooler aspects of being a doomsday prepper is being able to go down into your bunker and admire your baked beans collection at any time

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mean things I say to myself @meantomyself.bsky.social · 14/09/2026

My life started falling apart when Mitch McConnell disappeared and I think the curse can only be broken by him walking slowly out of a chocolate factory with a cane and then somersaulting

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Better Things Are Possible @internethippo.bsky.social · 14/09/2026

Every other headline now is "Huge liar who's financially motivated to lie says"

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'dro🐰 @clowndro.bsky.social · 14/09/2026

If a liberty biberty landed on my windshield I would kill it with a flamethrower

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weeder @weeder.bsky.social · 13/09/2026

Oh you welcomed your first baby? I've welcomed dozens of babies. Any baby is welcome around me.

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Frovo @frovo.bsky.social · 13/09/2026

PESSIMIST: the glass is half empty OPTIMIST: the glass is half full OPTIMUS: the glass transforms into a cool robot

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Better Things Are Possible @internethippo.bsky.social · 12/09/2026

(concerned reporter voice, talking to candidate) What is your message to stupid jerks who will never vote for you

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