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eleanor rigbae 🌋

@twerk.life
255 followers 414 following 183 posts

the apocalypse was actually the friends we made along the way click on my link to join the hyperloop twerk.life

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eleanor rigbae 🌋 @twerk.life · 24/09/2026
with the cost of .life domain renewals about to skyrocket i've decided to kill this account i never use anyways don't cry for me you can't see how many .cool jobs i've quit to be able .insure you find .community here might take out some .loans porkbun.com/blog/domain-...
porkbun.com
Domain Name Price Increases October 6, 2025 - Porkbun.com
Did you hear about the domain name price increases happening October 6, 2025? This article lists all 233 affected domain extensions.
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eleanor rigbae 🌋 @twerk.life · 12/06/2026
we never get the zoot suit riot we want, we always get the zoot suit riot we deserve
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Travis comma bitch @prof-hinkley.bsky.social · 12/06/2026
C'mon man, the horse I rode in on had nothing to do with it
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mr. cannoli @boner.ink · 11/06/2026
going door to door knocking on group chats asking if my wife is in there
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BEAVE @beaveinflow.bsky.social · 12/06/2026
My group chat is just me and your mom sharing wholesome recipes.
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alexis simpson @amutepiggy.bsky.social · 12/06/2026
DID YOU KNOW: Disney/Pixar named him "Buzz" Lightyear as a nod to the character 's obvious drinking problem
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chris. @azedand2knots.bsky.social · 12/06/2026
One thing I notice that people don't like is when I post.
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Fun @funkelly.bsky.social · 12/06/2026
end your sentences with prepositions, who gives a fuck at
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eleanor rigbae 🌋 @twerk.life · 17/10/2025
funeral director: listen thanks for bringing the birthday cake, however the family asks that you deflate the moon bounce
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eleanor rigbae 🌋 @twerk.life · 17/10/2025
funeral director: listen thanks for bringing the birthday cake, however the family asks that you deflate the moon bounce
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eleanor rigbae 🌋 @twerk.life · 26/03/2025
so, we ran a diagnostic. we can't repair it because, technically, the camera on your phone isn't defective. it only mirrors your collective failures and poor choices as a human being.
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eleanor rigbae 🌋 @twerk.life · 28/12/2024
if you think being grey isn’t fair wait until you’re bald
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Lizzy @stonedeva.bsky.social · 03/09/2025
old reluctant ninja turtles 🎶
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Northern Lights TO @northernlightsto.bsky.social · 31/08/2025
Me: Well, I'm no expert. Him: But? Me: But what?
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Gef the Toking Mongoose @geftokingmongoose.bsky.social · 10/04/2025
I appreciate that these cheese puffs understand what an actual serving size for me is
A close up of the nutritional facts for a bag of cheese puffs showing the serving size is 28 g/about 55 puffs
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E.J. Friedman @ejfriedman.me · 06/04/2025
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eleanor rigbae 🌋 @twerk.life · 26/03/2025
so, we ran a diagnostic. we can't repair it because, technically, the camera on your phone isn't defective. it only mirrors your collective failures and poor choices as a human being.
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lisabug @lisabug.bsky.social · 26/03/2025
Even though I lit him on fire and buried him in the backyard, my childhood teddy bear kept showing up on my bed.
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eleanor rigbae 🌋 @twerk.life · 26/03/2025
biscuits are just cakes that weren't hugged enough as children
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Fun @funkelly.bsky.social · 26/03/2025
how many of you are ghosts
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Pumpkin Escobar @kingmonkeysunkle.bsky.social · 25/03/2025
Sorry for the way I am when I'm conscious
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eleanor rigbae 🌋 @twerk.life · 26/03/2025
Me: Please use "honky" in a sentence. ChatGPT: Fuck you Honky. Me: That's not very nice. ChatGPT: You said to use it in a sentence?
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Mteague @mteague.bsky.social · 24/03/2025
Defenestrated in Detroit
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eleanor rigbae 🌋 @twerk.life · 24/03/2025
Jelqed in Jasper
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eleanor rigbae 🌋 @twerk.life · 24/03/2025
gaped in georgetown
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eleanor rigbae 🌋 @twerk.life · 24/03/2025
frisked in fresno
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bacon popsicle 🧴 @gupton68.bsky.social · 26/02/2025
Alexa, massage my hippopotamus.
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✨bunni🌙 @bunnireadshorror.bsky.social · 24/02/2025
please stop wearing Harley Davidson shirts if you don’t listen to his music smh
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Bread John @breadery.bsky.social · 24/02/2025
The Macarena is pretty menacing if you do it in silence in the queue at the bank.
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Jason, ex Inferis @benedictsred.bsky.social · 21/02/2025
Any time a child memorizes a bible passage, they should be allowed to have one cigarette.
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Mr. Bea Arthur, Batshit Crazy™️ @steamymac.bsky.social · 14/02/2025
Her: You smell nice, what is that? Me: Despair.
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Dumb Beezie @dumbbeezie.bsky.social · 14/02/2025
Be mine
A scene from the film silence of the lambs with the dog looking down a deep hole
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eleanor rigbae 🌋 @twerk.life · 14/02/2025
"you are my soul mate" and that's as far as i got before she threw the big mac at me and slammed the drive-thru window on my hand
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Raquel Squelch @raquelsquelch.bsky.social · 13/02/2025
it's not a manifesto it's a love letter the doodled hearts should have cleared up any confusion
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Tusk Jenkins @tuskjenkins.bsky.social · 13/02/2025
Dirty mattress on the street that says nothing really mattress
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𝙱𝚊𝚋𝚎 𝚁𝚞𝚝𝚑𝚕𝚎𝚜𝚜 @unfitz.bsky.social · 11/02/2025
White noise is just regular noise that felt threatened by the superbowl halftime show.
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eleanor rigbae 🌋 @twerk.life · 12/02/2025
Make Amerigo Nuovo Fantastico
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smithsonianthadius🍥 @fungiblethadius.bsky.social · 29/01/2025
| ̄ ̄ ̄ ̄ ̄ ̄ ̄ ̄ ̄ ̄ ̄ ̄ ̄| BUTTHOLES |_____________| \ (•◡•) / \ / —— | | | |
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Frances Meh @francesmeh.reviews · 29/01/2025
posts about the death of god and who may or may not have killed him only appeal to a nietzsche audience
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eleanor rigbae 🌋 @twerk.life · 07/01/2025
tambourine guy: i'm not really having a very jingle-jangle morning me: unfollowed
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eleanor rigbae 🌋 @twerk.life · 29/01/2025
OK well, turns out I swiped right and slutted it up with a conquistadouche and now he’s referring to me as the founder and ceo of his cock
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eleanor rigbae 🌋 @twerk.life · 29/01/2025
which word conveys “aggressive sex pest tech bro” energy more clearly: conquistadork or conquistadouche
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Kimster @aquavulva.bsky.social · 21/01/2025
Willy Wonka & the Butthole Factory
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eleanor rigbae 🌋 @twerk.life · 21/01/2025
Butthole and Maude
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DaddyJew @daddyjew.bsky.social · 08/01/2025
Well well well if it isn't the same bill I couldn’t afford to pay in a different color
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