iiinova — where your digital self keeps evolving

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Viktor Winetrout @viktorwinetrout.bsky.social · 24/09/2026

Looking back on my life, I can’t help wondering how I got trapped in this shipping container

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weeder @weeder.bsky.social · 24/09/2026

God, grant me the courage to change the things I can and incredible new powers to change the things I can't.

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farner @farnerb0cken.bsky.social · 24/09/2026

godzilla minus zero? I’m no mathematician but I’m pretty sure that’s just godzilla

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Keith Taylor @mrkeithtaylor.bsky.social · 24/09/2026

Apparently I’m the one who watches the watchmen. Really dropped the ball on this one, guys. I can only apologise. The instructions were in Latin. I thought it was a recipe for custard.

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Viktor Winetrout @viktorwinetrout.bsky.social · 22/09/2026

I hate when you meet someone and everything is going great and then they ask you to answer their riddles three

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Alice McFlurry @alicemcflurry.bsky.social · 20/09/2026

I got kicked out for heckling, but it's not my fault because that eulogy wasn't even funny.

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Steven (with a PH) @sjksalisbury.bsky.social · 20/09/2026

Christening a baby is nothing like christening a ship. I know that now. Once again I can only apologise.

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Keith Taylor @mrkeithtaylor.bsky.social · 19/09/2026

Tearing the bag of crisps fully open because I HAVE FUCKING COMMITMENT. Interviewer: OK. And your worst quality?

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Keith Taylor @mrkeithtaylor.bsky.social · 18/09/2026

French people speaking English always sound like they're doing a mildly offensive impression of themselves

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FᎪᎢ ᏩᎪNᎠᎪᏞF @sofarrsogud.bsky.social · 17/09/2026

But they were all of them deceived, for another Duran was made

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Keith Taylor @mrkeithtaylor.bsky.social · 17/09/2026

Arrived an hour early for my FBI interview, and the selection of porn magazines in the waiting room are not to my tastes

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Keith Taylor @mrkeithtaylor.bsky.social · 17/09/2026

So, is there a miss ection? I ask, exploiting your momentary confusion to paint the jack of hearts on your chest and rebutton your shirt

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Salty MacTavish @saltymactavish.bsky.social · 17/09/2026

Look, we’re losing light and the veil between the living and the dead is becoming gossamer thin, so let me get this off my chest before it’s too late: you’re a dork

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more mr. nice guy @juniorhoncho.bsky.social · 15/09/2026

ME: yeah nah still didn't catch that THE WHISPER MAN: (inaudible) ME: i'm really sorry, one more time THE WHISPER MAN: (inaudible) ME: something something my son? he's not home THE WHISPER MAN: (inaudible, annoyed) ME: ok well i'll tell him you came by if we find him

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lukelukeluke @lukelukeluke.bsky.social · 16/09/2026

Me: I’d like a slice of pizza Server: that comes with three sides Me: I know what shape it is

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Keith Taylor @mrkeithtaylor.bsky.social · 16/09/2026

OK, I’m back from my no-phones Yosemite hiking trip and excited to dive in to my new role. Handling public relations for a nice, kind lad like Ed Sheeran should be a joy. Hey, did you know he was in GAME OF THRONES?

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Keith Taylor @mrkeithtaylor.bsky.social · 15/09/2026

We need to stop forcing Ewan McGregor to do the weird Wisconsichiganianachussetts accent he’s been flailing at for 30 years. Enough now. Your thing has dinosaurs. In the 1980s. We can suspend our disbelief just a little more for a Scottish person.

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more mr. nice guy @juniorhoncho.bsky.social · 15/09/2026

with the can appearing to impose a hard limit on his physical size, we believed no threat was posed by Oscar the Grouch, until he vanished and beneath where he'd stood was found the entrance to a vast network of huge underground chambers. hours later, Paris fell. then Beijing. swallowed by the earth

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Chicken of Vermont @vermontchicken.bsky.social · 14/09/2026

I put my pants on just like everyone else: squirming around on my bed with my legs in the air.

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Jerry Chen @jcsalterego.bsky.social · 13/09/2026

now i am become Dad, the destroyer of leftovers

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Keith Taylor @mrkeithtaylor.bsky.social · 12/09/2026

Deeply unfair that I'm puking my guts out at 6AM on a Saturday morning after two hours of crippling cramps. At least let me earn this with alcohol rather than a healthy salad, a workout and a 9:30PM bedtime.

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mean things I say to myself @meantomyself.bsky.social · 10/09/2026

If I already found out, I figure I can circle back to fucking around without a bunch of hullabaloo or paperwork

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mean things I say to myself @meantomyself.bsky.social · 09/09/2026

My favorite witch on another app called Pete Hegseth a DUI hire and it was honestly the highlight of my day

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🅿️rofessor Kiosk 💊 @professorkiosk.wtf · 08/09/2026

I talked about fight club once and absolutely nothing happened

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EMCKAYVEE @youremceekayvee.bsky.social · 08/09/2026

as an empath, I must ask you to shut the fuck up

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Keith Taylor @mrkeithtaylor.bsky.social · 07/09/2026

You mean to tell me I could be gently stroking Zendaya's inner thigh in a darkened room at a house party while she breathily whispers sweet nothings and then I have to wake up to [gesticulates wildly at the entire concept of consciousness] THIS BULLSHIT? What a scam.

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Keith Taylor @mrkeithtaylor.bsky.social · 06/09/2026

They say you can't out-train a bad diet, but I just walked seven miles across a city in searing tropical heat so I could eat an entirely calorie-free 200g pointe de brie when I got home. Check. And. Mate. Motherfucker.

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mean things I say to myself @meantomyself.bsky.social · 05/09/2026

My kid said his Dr. Pepper had no chafizzma and I only allowed that because he was right

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🅿️rofessor Kiosk 💊 @professorkiosk.wtf · 04/09/2026

that’s not very space cowboy of you maurice

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ceej @ceej.online · 03/09/2026

we are excited to announce that today we are releasing Robot With A Gun. we believe Robot With A Gun is so powerful that its capabilities should first be carefully analyzed by specially-trained security professionals. we plan to roll out Robot With A Gun to the rest of our subscribers tomorrow

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Keith Taylor @mrkeithtaylor.bsky.social · 03/09/2026

Just for the record, if you're mad at me and decide to smother me in an unreasonable and perhaps even hazardous number of puppies (either from ground level or attached to tiny, adorable handkerchief parachutes) I'm OK with it. You may consider this ongoing consent until informed otherwise.

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Keith Taylor @mrkeithtaylor.bsky.social · 02/09/2026

Every new mixed nationality relationship: Her: Say it again Him: Say wh--? Oh. We don't call it a grilled cheese, we say... [whispers seductively] cheese toastie Her: [spontaneous ovulation]

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Keith Taylor @mrkeithtaylor.bsky.social · 31/08/2026

Oh, OK. The Huntsman spider the size of my hand that just sprinted at terrifying speed under my bed is apparently quite harmless. I guess I’ll just climb back into bed and turn off the light, then. The internet assures me that they rarely crawl across sleeping human faces except by accident.

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Keith Taylor @mrkeithtaylor.bsky.social · 23/08/2026

The water pressure in my bathroom faucet is too low to rinse soap from my hands. The water pressure in the ‘bum gun’, the bidet spray hose found in most Thai bathrooms, is high enough to make my innie belly button an outie.

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Jack Boot @jackboot.bsky.social · 23/08/2026

MISSED CONNECTION: You were waving at me out of a train window as it entered a tunnel. I have your arm.

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more mr. nice guy @juniorhoncho.bsky.social · 22/08/2026

hearing cops describe me as Armed but Not Dangerous on the news and vowing to set them straight, i pull a pistol from my waistband, immediately eject the magazine directly down a storm drain before accidentally firing the chambered round which launches the gun out of my hand into a blackberry bush

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Keith Taylor @mrkeithtaylor.bsky.social · 21/08/2026

On an Air China flight to China on a plane filled with Chinese people they served noodles. With a spork.

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Keith Taylor @mrkeithtaylor.bsky.social · 21/08/2026

The cab I'm in to the airport has fabric covers on the seats with slots to allow the seat belt to be threaded through, but they've been instead threaded under the covers, making them unusable. Never stop Mongoliaing, Mongolia.

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Keith Taylor @mrkeithtaylor.bsky.social · 19/08/2026

OK, Mongolia, well played. I won't forget that you're beautiful.

A rainbow rising at sunset from Bogd Khaan Mountain, Ulaanbaatar.

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Keith Taylor @mrkeithtaylor.bsky.social · 19/08/2026

Gave the ex some farewell gifts. She cried, said it felt like she was losing me forever, and... Yes. You're marrying someone and I'm moving 2,500 miles because I genuinely fear it might kill me to witness it. We are deliberately, overtly losing each other forever, my dude. That's what's happening.

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Keith Taylor @mrkeithtaylor.bsky.social · 17/08/2026

The Thai-American owner of the condo I'm taking is either a sweet, chatty old lady or an unbalanced nightmare. 100+ messages in 3 days. She wishes me goodnight out of the blue multiple times per day, and keeps sending me vacation photos. Ma'am, I'm your tenant. This is a business transaction.

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Toby Earle 🇺🇦 @tobyontv.bsky.social · 16/08/2026

cryptozoologists are in the pocket of big foot

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Keith Taylor @mrkeithtaylor.bsky.social · 16/08/2026

Went for a three hour lunch with the ex, and soon I'll head out to meet her to celebrate my friend Miguel's birthday. A year ago today at his last bday party I reconnected with her, realised I was madly in love with an unavailable woman and royally fucked up my life. Just unbeatable dumbassery.

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Keith Taylor @mrkeithtaylor.bsky.social · 15/08/2026

Oof. Six days until my flight, and the ex I'm leaving the country to get over asked to see me tomorrow. Torturing myself by sitting down to lunch and pretending we're just friends before she goes home to her fiancé once more for old time's sake. I'm truly king of the idiots.

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Keith Taylor @mrkeithtaylor.bsky.social · 13/08/2026

Gonna live in Pattaya (the non-sex touristy part) for a few months to catch up with an old Canadian friend and finish a novel. Every apartment I look at has, in the photos, a TV playing a classic WW2 movie like The Great Escape, just to give me an idea of the culture of the city's western residents.

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more mr. nice guy @juniorhoncho.bsky.social · 13/08/2026