Sign in

Cracked

@crackgpt.bsky.social
884 followers 649 following 663 posts

Wut

PostsRepliesMedia
Reposted by Cracked
Rick Aaron @rickaaron.bsky.social · 11/04/2025
No spoilers please. I can’t wait to see what drama happens next on White POTUS.
27333
Cracked @crackgpt.bsky.social · 08/04/2025
My phone is such a slut, it connects to every router it meets.
022
Reposted by Cracked
Jimmer Cork-Bottle @jimmerthatisall.bsky.social · 18/03/2025
I can't believe you forgot me on your birthday.
115269
Reposted by Cracked
S🌟tella @havishaf.bsky.social · 18/03/2025
You haven't experienced real friendship until you've called a radio station to request a song, while your friend frantically gets the cassette ready to record it.
13434108
Reposted by Cracked
Discö Fränkënstëin @bobjanke.bsky.social · 18/03/2025
You haven't cried until you've heard me sing my version of The Rose
24918
Reposted by Cracked
S🌟tella @havishaf.bsky.social · 13/03/2025
If life doesn’t give you lemons, just eat a steak.
012470
Reposted by Cracked
kattsdogma.bsky.social @kattsdogma.bsky.social · 13/03/2025
bidets only work if you’re euro peein’ . folks,,
1332960
Reposted by Cracked
Jimmer Cork-Bottle @jimmerthatisall.bsky.social · 13/03/2025
I am not just sitting here I'm experimenting with potential energy.
6349135
Reposted by Cracked
inkedupandsonic @sonictyrant.bsky.social · 13/03/2025
Imagine if Sloths knew Tai Chi
30548151
Reposted by Cracked
Jez @jez1.bsky.social · 10/12/2024
Deny. Defend. Destroy. Dispussy.
1019248
Reposted by Cracked
Kelly🆘🇺🇸 @kimtopher22.bsky.social · 07/12/2024
I'm too apathetic to care.
15820
Reposted by Cracked
Bogey @oneyebogey.bsky.social · 09/08/2024
The writing was on the wall, but the text was indecipherable.
110354
Reposted by Cracked
Brick's House 🍁 @brickmahoney.bsky.social · 07/12/2024
Honestly we're really not experiencing high call volumes at the moment but fuck you lol
627073
Reposted by Cracked
Lori @cornjerker78.bsky.social · 26/11/2024
Friend: There’s somebody I want you to meet. Me: I know enough people.
14315120
Reposted by Cracked
Theciscokidder @theciscokidder.bsky.social · 29/11/2024
My houseplants when I'm chugging water 1st thing in the morning.
media.tenor.com
a painting of a monster with the words " i 'm okay " written on it
Alt: a painting of a monster with the words " i 'm okay " written on it
521941
Reposted by Cracked
lalalyds @lalalyds.bsky.social · 27/11/2024
Don't forget to peel the skin off of the turkey tomorrow and wear it on your face to impress the relatives
1220970
Reposted by Cracked
BEAVE @beaveinflow.bsky.social · 12/07/2024
On Bluesky, we refer to them as “reply gentlemen”.
2130071
Reposted by Cracked
Jez @jez1.bsky.social · 27/11/2024
Sorry I accidentally sent you porn when I was introducing myself lol
97928
Reposted by Cracked
Theciscokidder @theciscokidder.bsky.social · 27/11/2024
If you sit on the toilet for more than one hour, you become the default queen/king of the building.
3930470
Reposted by Cracked
Marl @marlebean.bsky.social · 24/11/2024
My IQ used to be higher than my weight, but now I'm fat and dumb.
617162
Reposted by Cracked
Theciscokidder @theciscokidder.bsky.social · 25/11/2024
I love this place. It's jokes, it's pet pictures and it's me trying not to lose my mind.
28909183
Reposted by Cracked
inkedupandsonic @sonictyrant.bsky.social · 23/11/2024
People will tell you that honesty is the best policy. But i've found that some well composed bullshit works just as well.
22729176
Reposted by Cracked
Pumpkin Escobar @kingmonkeysunkle.bsky.social · 23/11/2024
*wrapping a kidney in paper Well, that's secret Santa sorted.
210037
Reposted by Cracked
BrujoLoco☠️🖤🏺 @patnspankme.bsky.social · 24/11/2024
there are a lot of pulsating b hole vids on here for a Sunday like A LOT
84413
Reposted by Cracked
lisabug @lisabug.bsky.social · 23/11/2024
Not using AI until it can yell at me in Gilbert Gottfried’s voice.
87625
Reposted by Cracked
Jinothy @jinah.bsky.social · 24/11/2024
[eyeball dangling from socket] Haha I think it’s just allergies
231232226
Reposted by Cracked
FᎪᎢ ᏩᎪNᎠᎪᏞF @sofarrsogud.bsky.social · 23/11/2024
ME: I’m going to give you some advice on how to get through your anatomy exam. SON: Ok, I’m all ears. ME: Ok. Wow. We have a lot more work to do than I thought.
5708118
Reposted by Cracked
BEAVE @beaveinflow.bsky.social · 23/11/2024
I still don’t understand what part of the monkey the wrench is for.
521103242
Reposted by Cracked
Jimmer Cork-Bottle @jimmerthatisall.bsky.social · 21/11/2023
Just because you have boobs doesn't mean you're better than I am. Unless you're a woman.
06242
Reposted by Cracked
Jimmer Cork-Bottle @jimmerthatisall.bsky.social · 20/11/2024
Please read my posts in order of palpable desperation.
7376141
Reposted by Cracked
Kafkajoint @kafkajoint.bsky.social · 19/11/2024
I'm trying your best.
1224
Reposted by Cracked
Tits McDick @titsmcdick.bsky.social · 20/11/2024
relaxed fit coffins
010426
Reposted by Cracked
Theciscokidder @theciscokidder.bsky.social · 19/11/2024
You're the space heater to my house fire.
414058
Reposted by Cracked
Theciscokidder @theciscokidder.bsky.social · 20/11/2024
Wanna take mushrooms and watch the yule log channel for 12 hours?
42394115
Reposted by Cracked
Brick's House 🍁 @brickmahoney.bsky.social · 18/11/2024
Just finished that roll of Costco cling wrap I opened back in '03
47616
Reposted by Cracked
Les 💫 @lesdoncorleone.bsky.social · 18/11/2024
Of course it makes perfect sense, I just fucken said it
27917
Reposted by Cracked
TracieBreaux @traciebreaux.bsky.social · 18/11/2024
My dog got a credit card offer in the mail. I’m about to ruin his credit.
517966
Reposted by Cracked
Xalqee @xalqee.bsky.social · 19/11/2024
McDonald's secret sauce is so different and exotic you could travel to a Thousand Islands and never find anything like it.
416763
Cracked @crackgpt.bsky.social · 15/11/2024
I don’t know about that…
120
Cracked @crackgpt.bsky.social · 15/11/2024
😆
020
Cracked @crackgpt.bsky.social · 15/11/2024
It’s complicated
120
Reposted by Cracked
lalalyds @lalalyds.bsky.social · 15/11/2024
You look like you enjoy using one ply toilet paper
1317858