Reposted by Rick Aaron𝙱𝚊𝚋𝚎 𝚁𝚞𝚝𝚑𝚕𝚎𝚜𝚜 @unfitz.bsky.social · 13/05/2026I donated my body to science but science regifted it to science fiction. 222374
Reposted by Rick Aaronbacon popsicle 🧴 @gupton68.bsky.social · 13/05/2026The human body is truly a complex and wondrous thing, who’d have thought that one day I’d find my whole body could be wracked with pain following a solitary sneeze. 622983
Reposted by Rick AaronUncle Duke @uncleduke1969.bsky.social · 13/05/2026M: that’s O: not R: how O: acronyms N: work 31662114
Reposted by Rick AaronUncle Duke @uncleduke1969.bsky.social · 05/05/2026After Ernie left, Bert’s life became an amphetamine-fueled whirlwind of after-hours parties, drunken Grindr hook-ups, and multiple arrests for public indecency, finally ending in a stay at the Betty Ford Clinic for “exhaustion” and his membership in the Church of Scientology. 1938897
Reposted by Rick AaronJohn Lyon @johnlyon.bsky.social · 06/05/2026Finally figured out the solution to unwanted visitors. 520250
Reposted by Rick AaronBrick's House 🍁 @brickmahoney.bsky.social · 06/05/2026genie: and for your third wish? me: i dunno, i guess it might be nice to only have to go pee twice during the night 319662
Reposted by Rick AaronJimmer Cork-Bottle @jimmerthatisall.bsky.social · 06/05/2026This day in history. 1757. English poet Christopher Smart, also known as Mrs Mary Midnight, Ebenezer Pentweazle, and Freddie Two-Barns Burnett, was committed to an insane asylum by his father-in-law for being alarmingly religious. 46327
Reposted by Rick AaronDropped Mike @rebrafsim.bsky.social · 15/01/2025interviewer: how are your listening skills? me: absolutely 383071488
Reposted by Rick AaronUncle Duke @uncleduke1969.bsky.social · 04/05/2026“First you bug me to go out, and now you want to come right back in? You've been out there for like thirty seconds. Did you at least pee? Tell me you at least peed." 14465106
Reposted by Rick AaronBrick's House 🍁 @brickmahoney.bsky.social · 04/05/2026When you have to choose between making that Death Star payment or going to the dentist 27325
Reposted by Rick Aaronbacon popsicle 🧴 @gupton68.bsky.social · 04/05/2026My wife and I settle our biggest arguments the traditional way. Thumb wars. 414770
Reposted by Rick AaronUncle Duke @uncleduke1969.bsky.social · 04/05/2026DARTH VADER: “And, this is from when I was six and my parents took me to the beach on- Hey! Why are you guys laughing?” 2249774
Reposted by Rick AaronUncle Duke @uncleduke1969.bsky.social · 04/05/2026"Sholomon, King Sholomon." 1843585
Reposted by Rick AaronBrick's House 🍁 @brickmahoney.bsky.social · 25/04/2026the wordle yesterday was drunk and it took me 6 rums to get it but i got the wordle in 3 23612
Reposted by Rick AaronUncle Duke @uncleduke1969.bsky.social · 23/04/2026theirs was a love that could never be 1045753782
Reposted by Rick AaronUncle Duke @uncleduke1969.bsky.social · 23/04/2026is it love? i bet it’s love 611079218
Reposted by Rick Aaron𝙱𝚊𝚋𝚎 𝚁𝚞𝚝𝚑𝚕𝚎𝚜𝚜 @unfitz.bsky.social · 23/04/2026“I’m not one to judge” TRANSLATION: Here comes the judgy part! 314745
Reposted by Rick Aaronbacon popsicle 🧴 @gupton68.bsky.social · 23/04/2026judge: how do you plead? me: well, I can't speak for the defendant but— judge: of course you can, you’re his attorney me: well in that case, he’s clearly guilty as hell! 213257
Reposted by Rick AaronJimmer Cork-Bottle @jimmerthatisall.bsky.social · 23/04/2026This day in history. 1945. Hermann Göring sent Hitler a telegram stating that he Göring was prepared to take over for him Hitler if he Hitler was incapacitated. This made Hitler so angry that he ordered a halt to all work on the Adolf and Eva Hitler Ballroom then being built above the Führerbunker. 111735
Reposted by Rick AaronJohn Lyon @johnlyon.bsky.social · 22/04/2026🎵 I’d like to teach the world to use turn signals 🎵 69134
Rick Aaron @rickaaron.bsky.social · 22/04/2026A swollen stinging hand is in the eye of the bee holder. 0104
Reposted by Rick AaronJimmer Cork-Bottle @jimmerthatisall.bsky.social · 22/04/2026This day in history. 1906. The Intercalated Games opened in Athens. Catchy title I think the same people named the Quadruple Four Quartet. 03821
Reposted by Rick Aaronbacon popsicle 🧴 @gupton68.bsky.social · 22/04/2026[having the birds & bees talk with 13] Well son, a bird in the hand is worth two in the bush and bees have the best knees! 310049
Reposted by Rick AaronUncle Duke @uncleduke1969.bsky.social · 22/04/2026It’s Earth Day… Hug a tree! - Text the tree the next day. - Start hugging the tree regularly. - Meet the tree’s parents. - Move in with the tree. - Marry the tree. - Stop hugging the tree. - Grow apart from the tree. - Start hugging other trees. - Divorce the tree. - Die alone. 1625567
Reposted by Rick AaronBrick's House 🍁 @brickmahoney.bsky.social · 22/04/2026phht. every action hero digs out a bullet. show me one digging out an ingrown toenail 711449
Rick Aaron @rickaaron.bsky.social · 22/04/2026Milk will be $4 a gallon if they ever close the Strait of Hormoos. No YOU shut up! 16515
Reposted by Rick AaronDropped Mike @rebrafsim.bsky.social · 21/04/2026me: jesus said you have to forgive your debtors bank manager: no me: I’m calling the pope 525249
Reposted by Rick AaronJohn Lyon @johnlyon.bsky.social · 22/04/2026Any time can be quitting time if you just don’t care anymore. 316752
Reposted by Rick Aaron𝙱𝚊𝚋𝚎 𝚁𝚞𝚝𝚑𝚕𝚎𝚜𝚜 @unfitz.bsky.social · 21/04/2026[Walking into the bank] I see debt people 119065
Reposted by Rick AaronJohn Lyon @johnlyon.bsky.social · 20/04/2026So it turns out you can eat cranberry sauce when it’s not Thanksgiving and nothing happens. You don’t get arrested or anything. 815839
Reposted by Rick Aaron𝙱𝚊𝚋𝚎 𝚁𝚞𝚝𝚑𝚕𝚎𝚜𝚜 @unfitz.bsky.social · 20/04/2026[car accident] Stand back, everyone. I’m no doctor but I have a box of Band-Aids®️ containing every size they make. 616343
Reposted by Rick AaronUncle Duke @uncleduke1969.bsky.social · 20/04/2026“GUYS! WAKE UP! SOME DUDE JUST ATE CARL!” 1495011588
Rick Aaron @rickaaron.bsky.social · 20/04/2026My local gas station must be run by stoners because they’re charging $4.20 today. 0237
Reposted by Rick AaronUncle Duke @uncleduke1969.bsky.social · 20/04/2026one of us either needs to take grandma to the optometrist or tell her no more cats 1239192
Reposted by Rick Aaronbacon popsicle 🧴 @gupton68.bsky.social · 20/04/2026There’s little that can reduce you to tears quite so exquisitely as the right piece of music at just the right time. That said, a well timed football to the testicles does come close though. 317963
Reposted by Rick AaronJimmer Cork-Bottle @jimmerthatisall.bsky.social · 20/04/2026This day in history. 1968. British Conservative MP Enoch Powell delivered his Rivers of Blood speech against immigration from Commonwealth countries and anti-racism legislation. Party leader Edward Heath demoted him the next day but he did receive the Football Association Peace Prize. 15920
Reposted by Rick AaronBrick's House 🍁 @brickmahoney.bsky.social · 20/04/2026[health app on my phone] did you sign your will motherfucker? 29636
Reposted by Rick Aaron𝙱𝚊𝚋𝚎 𝚁𝚞𝚝𝚑𝚕𝚎𝚜𝚜 @unfitz.bsky.social · 19/04/2026“Beauty is in the eye of the beholder,” and other aesthetic-related freak eye injuries. 29336
Rick Aaron @rickaaron.bsky.social · 19/04/2026Telling colorful & compelling tales of roadkill genitalia harvesting makes RFK Jr. a raccoonteur. 15120
Reposted by Rick AaronUncle Duke @uncleduke1969.bsky.social · 19/04/2026On a foggy early morning walk through my quiet suburban town today, I watched as other trudging figures began slowly emerging from the mist, and suddenly I felt like I was a member of the cast of a zombie apocalypse film comprised exclusively of middle-aged white guys. 1217435
Reposted by Rick AaronJimmer Cork-Bottle @jimmerthatisall.bsky.social · 18/04/2026This day in history. 1518. Bona Sforza was crowned queen consort to Polish king Sigismund I the Old. The name Bona can mean good-looking but she was not bona. In fact when a marriage was proposed for her to young Federico Gonzaga, his mother bit the matchmaker. 13719
Reposted by Rick AaronUncle Duke @uncleduke1969.bsky.social · 18/04/2026you just know somebody’s being called by their full name right now 1368185972
Reposted by Rick AaronJohn Lyon @johnlyon.bsky.social · 18/04/2026In retrospect, naming our band Sold Out was a terrible idea. 1014750
Reposted by Rick AaronBrick's House 🍁 @brickmahoney.bsky.social · 18/04/2026he always does this. now i'm going to have to explain what happened in the movie while he was asleep 852885
Reposted by Rick AaronMidge @midge.bsky.social · 18/04/2026A tank top under a tank top is an emotional support tank top 27428
Reposted by Rick AaronJimmer Cork-Bottle @jimmerthatisall.bsky.social · 17/04/2026"You're just a layabout who thinks he knows everything." "It's lieabout." 113450
Reposted by Rick AaronUncle Duke @uncleduke1969.bsky.social · 17/04/2026“This is awesome! Don’t you think this is awesome? So awesome!” “You are SO immature.” 221110119
Reposted by Rick AaronJimmer Cork-Bottle @jimmerthatisall.bsky.social · 17/04/2026This day in history. 1680. Mohawk saint Kateri Tekakwitha died near Montreal. Her spirit form however kept popping up for several weeks in front of her friends shouting PEEKABOO and BOOGA BOOGA. 13821
