iiinova — where your digital self keeps evolving

Kate @askatewouldhaveit.com · 09/04/2026

i’m committed to making this a priority unless it is a little harder than i thought

Kate @askatewouldhaveit.com · 08/04/2026

You have reached the Congressional offices of the United States. Currently the entire Legislative Branch is out doing the Michael Scott D.M.S.M.P.M.C. Rabies Awareness Pro-Am Fun Run Race for the Cure. Leave a message.

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Kate @askatewouldhaveit.com · 05/04/2026

having a teenager is like being systematically undermined by someone who would like an Easter basket

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Kate @askatewouldhaveit.com · 01/04/2026

The Manosphere documentary is just

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Kate @askatewouldhaveit.com · 30/03/2026

That man looked me in the eyes & said “I need you to know there’s a day in October you’ll have to wear jeans” because he knows my current lifestyle doesn’t support Hard Pants

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Kate @askatewouldhaveit.com · 27/03/2026

Another week ends. I have not divided a single fraction.

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Kate @askatewouldhaveit.com · 25/03/2026

i would follow the corgi into an active volcano without missing a beat & with peace in my heart

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Kate @askatewouldhaveit.com · 25/03/2026

does it mean ICE is funny on instagram now too

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Kate @askatewouldhaveit.com · 23/03/2026

Not doing anything about the dark web alert because I think it makes me sound mysterious

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Jerry Chen @jcsalterego.bsky.social · 23/03/2026

rip julius caesar you would have loved march madness

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Mal a BOO 👻 @hallowedverses.bsky.social · 23/03/2026

8 followers away from having enough people to reenact the prom scene in Grease

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Mary @anniemumary.bsky.social · 23/03/2026

There’s something about the shoppers at the grocery store on a Sunday night. We are not the go-getters. We ponder too long at the bananas, for what is time? We wait our turn for a lean cuisine. We hum along to Long December though it does not play. Granola bars and better days on the receipt.

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rax ‘levon honkers’ king @raxkingisdead.bsky.social · 22/03/2026

what’s the most kings hawaiian rolls you think you could realistically eat. 30? 40? i think i could put away 40 kings hawaiian rolls no problem

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Ygrene @ygrene.bsky.social · 22/03/2026

the human body was not designed to know what the worst person in the world is doing every fifteen minutes

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Kate @askatewouldhaveit.com · 22/03/2026

the medieval torture rack had to feel a little good at first. like just the first few clicks

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Kate @askatewouldhaveit.com · 18/07/2025

He concert-held the HR lady during Yellow and now his wife has to hear that song every time she’s in a CVS

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TeenagePhlebotomy @teenagephlebotomy.bsky.social · 17/07/2025

The title of my book about bookies is "You Bet Jurassic." There are also some dinosaurs in it.

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lisabug @lisabug.bsky.social · 17/07/2025

“I Said Something Weird Again” is the title of my book. Confessions of a Woman Who Tried to Love an Iguana Once

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Jerry Chen @jcsalterego.bsky.social · 17/07/2025

fondue? oh you mean fancy dunkaroos

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Kate @askatewouldhaveit.com · 18/07/2025

Cheating during a Coldplay song is bad but cheating during EVERY Coldplay song is actually a felony

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Kate @askatewouldhaveit.com · 17/07/2025

You, an adult: Sometimes just typing out the long text message helps to release your anger Me, a person like myself: Also hitting ‘send’ helps a lot for me

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Steven (with a PH) @sjksalisbury.bsky.social · 30/06/2025

As a man who fears only hippies and dinosaurs, this might just be the most terrifying sentence I've ever read.

An extract from a Guardian article about the risks associated with Lone Star Ticks that reads 'Lone star ticks are aggressive and can speedily follow a human target if they detect them. “They will hunt you, they are like a cross between a lentil and a velociraptor," said Sharon Pitcairn Forsyth, a conservationist who lives in the Washington DC area.'

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dissected @trepanation.bsky.social · 30/06/2025

hey i noticed you haven’t been eating shredded cheese out of the bag lately. are you perhaps feeling delightful

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Mr. Encyclopedia @eopoint.com · 25/06/2025

There is no situation where you would say "guys" that the gender neutral "sussy bakas" won't work instead.

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Mr. Encyclopedia @eopoint.com · 12/06/2025

How it feels to have executive dysfunction

A screenshot of a Windows XP error dialog that reads "Could not complete action because no" with an OK button

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Kate @askatewouldhaveit.com · 30/06/2025

Thomas Jefferson: life liberty happiness etc etc John Adams: what’s etc etc Thomas Jefferson: ok I’m not doing this with you right now

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Jimmer Cork-Bottle @jimmerthatisall.bsky.social · 29/06/2025

I would walk barefoot over hot koalas for you.

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Midge @midge.bsky.social · 29/06/2025

Praise Bin

Picture of a red trash can with a white top resembling a handmaid

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Corduroy Cheddar @corduroycheddar.bsky.social · 29/06/2025

Ruin a Tolstoy novel by changing 587287 words

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Kate @askatewouldhaveit.com · 29/06/2025

John Hancock: can we hurry this up my hand hurts Ben Franklin: maybe don’t sign it like you’re headlining Coachella

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Kate @askatewouldhaveit.com · 27/06/2025

We’re a country based on tradition and that’s why this American flag bikini has been passed down from my great grandmother

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Gef the Toking Mongoose @geftokingmongoose.bsky.social · 27/06/2025

get yourself a girl who vibrates with such intensity that it creates an audible hum and if you try to touch her it flays the flesh from your fingertips

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Kate @askatewouldhaveit.com · 27/06/2025

Out here shopping for grapevine trellises like an asshole

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Kate @askatewouldhaveit.com · 22/06/2025

My next-door neighbor mows his lawn so often it’s like he’s hiding something in it.

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aj @strawberry.bsky.to · 16/06/2025

they should invent a good thing that happens to me

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Kate @askatewouldhaveit.com · 16/06/2025

The guy who wants you to shave every day is not your soulmate

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Jimmer Cork-Bottle @jimmerthatisall.bsky.social · 12/06/2025

It's not a chore if you don't do it.

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taffy bennington @singwithtaffy.bsky.social · 17/12/2024

(strolls into men’s wearhouse) hello! how much to keep all my mens here

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Kate @askatewouldhaveit.com · 10/06/2025

[walking into a courtroom] I see pled people

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Sam @samuelhlowe.bsky.social · 08/06/2025

So tired of not having a girlfriend and not being able to discreetly watch her while she applies makeup in front of the mirror as I lean against the door frame until her eyes meet mine, and she asks, “What is it?” and I reply, “Nothing,” and she smiles, continuing to powder her face.

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Jason, ex Inferis @benedictsred.bsky.social · 09/06/2025

Saw that CNN has a new show called Eva Longoria: Searching for Spain and I really hope it’s just her pointing to places on a map and someone saying no

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S🌟tella @havishaf.bsky.social · 06/06/2025

I could be funny, smart, or insanely hot, but I chose the path of humility.

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The Lolly Dahma @castorp0llux.bsky.social · 09/06/2025

One thing I’ve learned since the COVID lock down is that the line between day clothes and pajamas is nebulous at best.

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FᎪᎢ ᏩᎪNᎠᎪᏞF @sofarrsogud.bsky.social · 08/06/2025

Am I accident prone? You bet. I'm also accident standing up.

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Ygrene @ygrene.bsky.social · 09/06/2025

today is the day that i finally journey through the bowling ball return chute

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al-boo @captainacabairbud.myatproto.social · 07/06/2025

they say a thunderstorm is god almighty throwing that ass back making those cheeks clap but there is still debate amongst biblical scholars

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SpacedMom @copymama.bsky.social · 09/06/2025

So sick of the “happy to jump on a call” bullshit. We all know the reality is “I’ll get on a call if you gotta be a dick about it but I’m praying this email will suffice.”

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Ygrene @ygrene.bsky.social · 12/05/2025

i went to youtube to give phil collins - in the air tonight a listen, as one does, and i would like to share the top comment with you

youtube comment on the official video for phil collins - in the air tonight, username emmettchan5545 says "I can phil it collin in the air tonight"

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🕸️ @holojester.bsky.social · 08/06/2025

dont make me do another joke please they hate me my brain: maybe we can win them back with jokes

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