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Alan James Kluegel

@ajk.bsky.social
255 followers 531 following 183 posts

Law professor at the University of Kentucky. Follows and retweets *are* endorsements. In fact, I enthusiastically endorse every single thing that every single person on every single site does and says. Speaking for myself and not the institution.

PostsRepliesMedia
Reposted by Alan James Kluegel
Mina Kimes @minakimes.bsky.social · 05/10/2026
Me when my parents rented DEEP IMPACT from Blockbuster
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Tim Price @timprice.bsky.social · 23/09/2026
You joined "grand vizier chat (secret)" You: dark rumors from aboard You: abroad* fuck Sssnakecharmer: mf said aboard WhispersintheChapel: ahoy matey lol PonderMyOrb changed the group name to "rumors from aboard"
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Jeff VanderMeer @jeffvandermeer.bsky.social · 30/09/2026
They quoted me in this New Yorker piece about AI today. www.newyorker.com/culture/the-...
“Let’s say there’s a world or time line I exist in where A.I. has been subject to regulation. It is ethical. It has no footprint environmentally,” the novelist Jeff VanderMeer, a prominent critic of A.I., told me over the phone. “With those guardrails in place, would I read an A.I. book? All I can say is no. And the reason is, in part, because I want to read something coming from a particular mind.” Using A.I., he said, “feels like a betrayal of the whole point of why you’re a writer.”
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merr-itt came from outer space @merrittk.com · 28/09/2026
Regrettably, I Find That I Must Reject the Left www.patreon.com/merrittk/posts/regrettably-i-i-170717499/
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Jesse @requiemarm.bsky.social · 14/04/2026
you shouldn’t learn about bands from shady TikTok manipulation, you should learn about bands by hanging out with a girl you like but are also extremely afraid of
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Katie Martin @katie0martin.ft.com · 25/09/2026
I have blamed The agents That hacked Your website And which You probably Reasonably thought I controlled Forgive me I am rich And unaccustomed To taking responsibility
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5uki5en5or @5uki5en5or.bsky.social · 20/09/2026
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Starfire’s Deranged Neocon Foreign Policy Podcast @irhottakes.bsky.social · 18/09/2026
It’s very simple. A reality TV host became dictator because he turned down a role for Sharknado 4 and that’s why the king of outer space, who cheats at Diablo, got to kill Africa. Now the economy is controlled by a sex cult that has something to do with Harry Potter fanfic because of robots.
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Steven (with a PH) @sjksalisbury.bsky.social · 20/09/2026
Christening a baby is nothing like christening a ship. I know that now. Once again I can only apologise.
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lukelukeluke @lukelukeluke.bsky.social · 16/09/2026
Me: I’d like a slice of pizza Server: that comes with three sides Me: I know what shape it is
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Elle @elleisanisland.bsky.social · 18/09/2026
Pope Leo XIV has been gifted a massive green orb and honestly not now massive green orb
Pope Leo by a green glass orb the size of a med-large pumpkin
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Dorothy @catandgirl.bsky.social · 17/09/2026
Cat and Girl vs Eternity
Take a photo, it will last longer, but not very long.
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Helen Rosner @hels.bsky.social · 16/09/2026
Kid was asking some pointed questions about how babies are born which led to me drawing the best picture I’ve drawn in my life
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Mrs. Detective PikaBOO, Esq. @clapifyoulikeme.favrd.social · 15/09/2026
This is one of the funniest threads I’ve read in ages. At no point does OP break, and the landlords, well, www.reddit.com/r/Landlord/c...
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Jo Wolff @jowolff.bsky.social · 14/09/2026
The fallacy that University leaders pushing AI are falling into is thinking that the point of undergraduate research is to find things out. It isn't. What students find out is typically already generally known. The point of undergraduate research is to learn how to find things out.
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Blaise Boo-lysse Bernard Collins @wittywebhandle.bsky.social · 12/09/2026
Nathan Field: You're a real PNG file, right?

Elizabeth Holmes on the PNG checkerboard background "Why would I deceive you?"
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Alan James Kluegel @ajk.bsky.social · 08/09/2026
Taj Gibson got traded! He's 41! This is elder abuse! www.espn.com/nba/story/_/...
espn.com
Sources: Pelicans trade Jordan Hawkins to Grizzlies in 4-player deal
The Pelicans have traded Jordan Hawkins, Micah Peavy, a future second-round draft pick and a future second-round pick swap to the Grizzlies for AJ Johnson and Taj Gibson, sources told ESPN.
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Jesse Raub @jesseraub.online · 08/09/2026
PEOPLE WITH LIBERAL ARTS DEGREES: so while i see there is utility to the system, i’m more or less morally opposed to their current constructs and have big concerns over the business structure and environmental impact WEB CODER: so i met God today,
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Patrick Monahan @pattymo.com · 06/09/2026
Homer protecting his sugar
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Jesse Raub @jesseraub.online · 03/09/2026
they've got a pre-write for your obit, bro. they're saying your legacy is complicated. they used the word complicit, bro
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Alan James Kluegel @ajk.bsky.social · 05/09/2026
bsky38.com
38 Most Influential Bluesky Posters of 2026
Vote for the 38 most influential Bluesky posters of 2026.
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Sen. Pumpkin Gogurt @ugarles.bsky.social · 03/09/2026
apologies for twitter posting but the auto-embedded chart made me laugh too hard not to share
Dasha tweeting "Are you r[REDACTED]s going to buy this crypto coin or what@bennycarlyle "wait what's it called"

@dash_eats "$dasha"

embedded chart shows it is $.000323 per coin and down 54.41%
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_Mark 🏳️‍🌈 @marxgbaker.bsky.social · 31/08/2026
Funniest possible example to choose
As a result, Armstrong has no plans to start a charity or a foundation.

"So far, I've just been like 'I'm not going to do that.' My fear is that it just gets captured by some ideology and I lose control over it," he said. "If you look at the Ford Foundation, I think Henry Ford would be turning over in his grave if he knew what they were up to."
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Mike X. Nichols @mikexnichols.bsky.social · 03/06/2026
lmao
The trolley car problem with Wile E. Coyote and the Road Runner. The trolley car defies the laws of physics and slams into Wile E. Coyote.
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beetle moses @beetlemoses.bsky.social · 31/08/2026
Three panel comic. Panel 1: in a diner, a waitress looks over her shoulder to watch a TV mounted on the wall. A news reporter is one screen, surrounded with text that reads FOUR DEAD and DEVELOPING STORY. The reporter says, “please be advised— the murderer is still at large.” Panel 2: the reporter continues, “here’s their photo.” He gestures with his pen towards a photo next to him. The photo is a guinea pig wearing a multicolored propeller hat. Panel 3: the waitress watches the TV pensively. Behind her at the diner counter is a guinea pig in a propeller hat, seated before a plate with an entire head of lettuce. This may be the murderer in question but at this stage I’d only be speculating.
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Alan James Kluegel @ajk.bsky.social · 31/08/2026
Five artists I've seen at least twice: Bob Dylan Old 97s DOOM GONG Robbie Fulks Arcade Fire Wow, I gotta ... I gotta make some changes.
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Grant Brisbee @grantbrisbee.bsky.social · 26/08/2026
[sighing to my wife at the table of a nice restaurant] No no no, milkshake ducks are just for racism. if you're complaining about fascists or homophobes, that's a drone metal orthodox priest guitarist. You don't think it makes a difference, but I'm saying it does. I am not raising my voice.
Drone Metal Orthodox Priest Guitarist Responds to Fascism, Homophobia Accusations
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A.R. Moxon @juliusgoat.bsky.social · 26/08/2026
Dolly Parton's passing is effortlessly proving that if you spend your life being nice and kind and generous instead of mean and cruel and selfish, then apologists for mean cruel selfish bullies won't have to go around scolding people for cheering when you die, because there will be no cheering.
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josh (oldfriend99) @oldfriend99.bsky.social · 25/08/2026
Dolly Parton taught me it was ok to be universally beloved
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Microplastics Sommelier @leastactionhero.bsky.social · 25/08/2026
RIP to a legend
rob dubbin @robdubbin

MY MAN: (comes home)
ME: (nervous) how was the store
MY MAN: fine
ME: oh thank g-
MY MAN: ran into jolene
ME: oh no
MY MAN: she mentioned you left kind of an intense voicemail

12:50 AM • Jul 29, 2019
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Alan James Kluegel @ajk.bsky.social · 25/08/2026
The ham is willing but the flesh is weak
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Bill Amend @billamend.bsky.social · 25/08/2026
I feel like the kids who did poorly in science and history class are trying to get revenge on the kids who did well at science and history class and now we’re all going to die
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Peter @notalawyer.bsky.social · 23/08/2026
“if we don’t stand up for the free speech of racists, it puts everyone’s free speech in danger.” - guy who only ever talks about free speech when it’s racism
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Timothy Burke @bubbaprog.xyz · 22/08/2026
sam darnold in an alaska airlines uniform looking up into space where text reads OUT INDEFINITELY
MAULED BY POLAR BAR
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rat dad ==> GATEway Fate @splinterhamato.bsky.social · 06/06/2026
a six foot tall woman can do whatever she wants forever honestly
A strange wall of blue and white text outside the bathroom at the Chesapeake house rest stop on i95.  The largest part of the text reads “A SIX-FOOT TALL WOMAN” in massive letters, which naturally titillates my attention.  The full text reads “The Chesapeake Bay is surprisingly shallow.  A SIX FOOT TALL WOMAN (in all caps) can wade through over 700,000 acres of the Bay without wetting her hat.”  There are also a bunch of other random bay-relatedwords collaged in all directions around the edge of it, saying things like “ecosystem, fresh, ocean, shallow, fascinating, Susquehanna, terrapin, fun” etc.  If you’re gonna make the centerpiece of the work massive text that says “A SIX FOOT TALL WOMAN” maybe you should also include some words in the collage like “#FEMINISM” and “LESBIAN LUST”.
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oh no @ili.bsky.social · 19/08/2026
en esta economía??????
nyt cooking melissa clark seis leches cake january 21, 2020
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Patrick Monahan @pattymo.com · 23/02/2025
TOWN BULLY (NOTICING REACHER): Who’s this, your boyfriend? REACHER (BLOTTING OUT SUN): No,
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derek guy @dieworkwear.bsky.social · 15/08/2026
trying to learn about audio equipment and intentionally looking for stores with one star reviews so i know the person at the shop is an enthusiast and not a businessperson
A Google review of an audio store reads: "Worst phone interaction I've ever had in my entire life. I called to ask if they had an electrostatic headphone amp, I was informed that it was a waste of money to own electrostatic headphones. Then I tried to say that I know a lot about headphones and own many and that I am just looking for an amplifier, but then I was interrupted and told that I don't know anything. Wild!"A Google review of an audio store reads: "I normally have tremendous empathy for the mentally ill but not with this guy. He's abusive, slanderous and bizarrely demanding -- and that's if he likes you. Maybe he can still repair stuff but I wouldn't know; I walked away after the third time he screamed at me for asking a simple question and that's no exaggeration. Actual screaming. Just wild."
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Alan James Kluegel @ajk.bsky.social · 15/08/2026
As you shift from criticizing a non-existent attack on contingent academic labor to criticizing a non-existent attack on non-contingent academic labor, I can only hope that when you speak of adjunct writing instructors you aren’t referring to yourself, as you’re 0-2 in reading comprehension thus far
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Alan James Kluegel @ajk.bsky.social · 15/08/2026
Those thousands of people — and of course I know many — are hanging on for dear life in contingent positions, their day jobs are things like “uber driver” not “theater director”, and they wouldn’t bust out some “as an academic” bullshit to defend a terrible “yes, but” post about someone’s suicide.
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Alan James Kluegel @ajk.bsky.social · 15/08/2026
Fair enough, and I suppose my primary objection to his post is his glib pivot from Arday’s very real suicide to some very imagined defense of fabulism, a move he justified as an academic with skin in the game. I think a lot of people have shown their ass over this, your friend included.
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Alan James Kluegel @ajk.bsky.social · 15/08/2026
It’s my favorite sketch from the popular television program, Saturday Night Live.
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Alan James Kluegel @ajk.bsky.social · 15/08/2026
Yeah, he presented himself as somehow qualified to do a “that dude’s death is bad, BUT” post because he “works in academia” when he knows and I know and you know that him saying that he “adjuncted a class while working full time as a theater director” wouldn’t have *quite* the same impact.
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Alan James Kluegel @ajk.bsky.social · 15/08/2026
Hey, I agree with you that academics should better police exaggerations and elisions in personal narratives, and you gotta start somewhere, you know? Good luck with your upcoming semester, fellow person who works in academia!
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Alan James Kluegel @ajk.bsky.social · 15/08/2026
Gotcha. Performance studies, right? You’re currently on the faculty, or you taught as an adjunct once a few years back? No slight against adjuncting, obviously, it can be incredibly valuable for students to learn from someone with real world experience.
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Alan James Kluegel @ajk.bsky.social · 15/08/2026
I can’t reply to this to ask, so I guess I have to quote tweet it? Isaac, where do you work in academia?
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Mike Drucker @mikedrucker.bsky.social · 13/08/2026
Every few months people are like “Is BlueSky dying” and every few months it doesn’t fucking matter because who gives a shit
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Alan James Kluegel @ajk.bsky.social · 13/08/2026
Every time I have to teach a Supreme Court case in a business law course it’s like the whole class gets dropped into the Black Lodge from Twin Peaks.
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Brendel @brendelbored.bsky.social · 12/08/2026
Devastating repost
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Ben Collins O @bencollins.bsky.so... • 35m
It's me!
Peter • @notalawyer.bsky.soc... • 2h must've been terrible to date AOC as a regular man because one minute you're dating a bartender who's a bit out of your league and the next there are tabloid stories like "you're not gonna believe how ugly this guy is"
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Better Things Are Possible @internethippo.bsky.social · 02/12/2025
Sorry to anyone who thought Wokeness was annoying but as we now know it's the price we pay for a civilized society
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