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TuSoon Shakur

@tusoonshakur.bsky.social
3.6K followers 275 following 229 posts

East Side ATL. CLS. Fella. Once turned Willem Dafoe into Willem Dafriend.

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Reposted by TuSoon Shakur
Ryan North @ryannorth.ca · 23/09/2026
Pompeii is a UNESCO world heritage site not because it was remarkable in its prime, but because it survived to our era untouched: one moment, preserved for all time. But future generations won't know what OUR world was like unless we do the same. This is why we MUST bury Toronto with a volcano
Picture of the streets of Pompeii, from https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Pompei_-_panoramio_(26).jpg. Taken by Tanya Dedyukhina, used under CC
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TuSoon Shakur @tusoonshakur.bsky.social · 24/09/2026
Hagrid thought to himself, “yes, but what thing did they ruddy hold?”
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Mary @anniemumary.bsky.social · 18/09/2026
The intensity of two people trying to figure out how to pay the parking meter.
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the hype @thehyyyype.bsky.social · 11/09/2026
Articles about athletes in legal trouble are great bc they always feel the need to include the guy's stats after describing the allegations. "Smith was arrested for punching his gf in the face. He allegedly kicked her a few times, too. Smith has rushed for over 8,000 career yards and 73 touchdowns."
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TuSoon Shakur @tusoonshakur.bsky.social · 05/09/2026
Well…it’s sorta big….I guess….
Big Ben at dusk. Sorta big. Not especially big.
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weeder @weeder.bsky.social · 30/08/2026
So Jacob Soboroff is actually extremely cool and everyone should Connect with him
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Amanda Mull @amandamull.bsky.social · 27/08/2026
Lotta people this weekend are gonna have a karaoke mic in their hand when they find out that Dolly was a SINGER singer and even the songs she made sound easy are very hard. Keep your head on a swivel.
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Alex Blechman @alexblechman.bsky.social · 19/08/2026
Reporter: You haven’t heard her name until now. She’s only seventeen years old. But White House intern Crespa Blumbo has been in charge of all nuclear missiles for the last two years and she just ordered the military to enact Project Acheron
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TuSoon Shakur @tusoonshakur.bsky.social · 07/08/2026
These were simpler times
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TuSoon Shakur @tusoonshakur.bsky.social · 06/08/2026
No one is mistaking your kindness for weakness. Cool it with that.
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TuSoon Shakur @tusoonshakur.bsky.social · 02/08/2026
Shakira does for me what Gloria Estefan did for my dad
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TuSoon Shakur @tusoonshakur.bsky.social · 25/07/2026
[Calling up the Delta CEO to complain about the snack selection] I’ll have you know I’m a SILVER MEDALLION MEMBER
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John Lyon @johnlyon.bsky.social · 18/07/2026
Hey Mr. Tambourine Man, play a song for me. *Tambourine Man shakes tambourine for several minutes* Well that sucked.
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TuSoon Shakur @tusoonshakur.bsky.social · 31/05/2026
Didn’t have my glasses on and read “hog” as “hoe” in the first panel. 10/10
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fesshole 🧻 @fesshole.bsky.social · 18/05/2026
The missus and I were having a light-hearted argument about whether we eat porridge or drink porridge. It escalated unexpectedly, words were exchanged, and she revealed she's been fucking someone on the side, so I suppose we're splitting up. Because of porridge.
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Adam Macqueen @adammacqueen.bsky.social · 03/05/2026
SHAFT
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TuSoon Shakur @tusoonshakur.bsky.social · 19/04/2026
I had all this shit on my bingo card I dunno what’s wrong with y’all’s cards
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FᎪᎢ ᏩᎪNᎠᎪᏞF @sofarrsogud.bsky.social · 13/04/2026
But they were all of them deceived, for another Non Blonde was made.
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Ken Klippenstein @kenklippenstein.bsky.social · 10/03/2026
MrBeast competition to see who can make it through the Strait of Hormuz
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Kip Conlon @kipconlon.bsky.social · 04/03/2026
As you can see from my clunky, unattractive ring, I graduated from high school.
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TuSoon Shakur @tusoonshakur.bsky.social · 24/02/2026
One of the more fun ironies in revisiting The Road Not Taken ages and ages after first reading it is that I am far more aware today of how unexceptional and banal my choices and abilities are than I was when I was, say, 22.
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Kate McKean @katemckean.bsky.social · 11/02/2026
Over on threads someone just use ai;dr and we all need to adopt that right quick
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The saddest girl to ever hold a martini @lifeisterrible.bsky.social · 15/02/2026
i can’t stop laughing
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Schrödinger's Sneetch Belly @rtodkelly.bsky.social · 26/01/2026
Now I want to know which CNN reporter or producer doesn't know the word "sycophant."
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jamelle @jamellebouie.net · 24/12/2025
this image is maybe the single greatest joke in TRADING PLACES. and also a pretty apt description of the trump/vance/national conservative vision of america
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Katie Mack @astrokatie.com · 01/01/2026
Do other countries have this weird notion that you’re not a “real” representative of the nation if you live in an urban center? Like do the French say Parisians aren’t really French? Are you considered not a real German if you live in Berlin? Or is this mainly a weird American thing?
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splendidland🌱 @splendid.land · 28/12/2025
painting of ET getting pelted with pinecones i did a few years ago
painting on canvas of a bald man in a yellow shirt throwing a pinecone at ET's head. a group of people also wielding pinecones are gathered behind him, becoming more shadowy and inhuman the further back they are. the sky is a sickly yellow colour, taking place at an unclear time of day
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Mary @anniemumary.bsky.social · 18/12/2025
If you’ve left your shopping until now, and you are in the market for men’s size small, let me assure you you’re good.
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the babahuck @tylerhuckabee.bsky.social · 15/12/2025
this is not behavior becoming of a FIFA Peace Prize recipient.
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TuSoon Shakur @tusoonshakur.bsky.social · 10/12/2025
All the fellas down at the swimmin' hole would suck in their guts when ole frog-chuckin' Ameline sauntered into the shallows, skin all aglow. "Ooh, there she goes," they would whisper amongst themselves. "There goes ole frog-chuckin' Ameline with her skin all aglow."
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TuSoon Shakur @tusoonshakur.bsky.social · 23/11/2025
Only I can prevent forest fires
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Novelty Cistern @noveltycistern.bsky.social · 14/11/2025
getting a text in the middle of the night and it's just my loathsome vizier saying "Your enemies lie in wait, my lord!!" what am I supposed to do with that. its four in the morning
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Schooley @schooley.bsky.social · 10/11/2025
I was in downtown LA last night and witnessed someone honking furiously at a Waymo for not making a right on red and it felt like it really captured our moment.
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TuSoon Shakur @tusoonshakur.bsky.social · 07/11/2025
[waiting the six seconds for my Keurig coffee to pour] cmon cmon cmon there has GOT to be a faster way
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CrazyMyra @outonthemoors.bsky.social · 22/10/2025
Putin: "Mr Trump, tear down this house!"
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Jake_Vig @jakevig.bsky.social · 25/08/2025
I just totally destroyed some baby at a game of peekaboo. He was right to cry.
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brent @murrman5.bsky.social · 03/08/2025
[wife wanting to discuss my mid life crisis] brent [me with my graffiti buddies] actually it’s Sprayz now
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Lauren Rinaldi @laurenrinaldi.bsky.social · 24/07/2025
Oh no I really hope Bill Clinton isn’t in the Epstein files, I’ll have to get rid of my Bill Clinton hat and my Bill Clinton sneakers and my Bill Clinton cologne and my Bill Clinton watch and take down my Bill Clinton flag and I’ll have to delete my Bill Clinton nft trading cards
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TuSoon Shakur @tusoonshakur.bsky.social · 15/07/2025
judge: the kid is not your son? michael jackson: hoo judge: the kid michael jackson: hee hee billie jean: you see the crap i put up with your honor
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𝙱𝚊𝚋𝚎 𝚁𝚞𝚝𝚑𝚕𝚎𝚜𝚜 @unfitz.bsky.social · 05/07/2024
Saw an AI fireworks show and a guy lost all 7 fingers on one hand.
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Nate @thenatewolf.bsky.social · 20/06/2025
I try to sneak in quietly, but my father is waiting for me in the kitchen. He looks at my digging leathers. He can smell the tomb on me. "You been doing archeology again, boy?" he asks. I sneeze and sand sizzles across the table.
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Frovo @frovo.bsky.social · 27/06/2025
IGUANA: see you later alligator ALLIGATOR: (doesn’t know spanish) see you tomorrow iguana
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ceej @ceej.online · 19/06/2025
this is a sith lightsaber, from the war. I keep it on a shelf right next to my stormtrooper armor and imperial officer’s uniform. I’ve even got a verified chunk of the death star from yavin. I’m just a collector. I just think the history is interesting. no, I don’t have any rebel stuff
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TuSoon Shakur @tusoonshakur.bsky.social · 17/06/2025
Shark Dad: what's this $250 charge for *squinting* OnlyFins? Shark Teen: *shrugging shoulders* i dunno Shark Dad: where'd you get shoulders?
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TOM @tomwalker.bsky.social · 13/06/2025
Just walkmogged some waitcucks at a traffic light’s pedestrian crossing. Enjoy the cold, dears - I’ll be over here, fifteen steps ahead of you and in touch with my city’s heartbeat
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TuSoon Shakur @tusoonshakur.bsky.social · 07/06/2025
Ah, vacation! That magical week when my kids watch TV in a rented house instead of our normal, mortgaged house.
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Drew Magary @drewmagary.bsky.social · 12/05/2025
“And so the Greeks send me this horse, we’re talking about one of the most beautiful horses you’ve ever seen. So big. So strong. Normally they keep this kind of horse for themselves but they were such big fans they said sir, please take our big wonderful horse we’ll even bring it to your house”
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TuSoon Shakur @tusoonshakur.bsky.social · 04/05/2025
Inherited grandpa’s lucky horseshoe autographed by Secretariat and now Antiques Road Show is telling me its a fake
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Brendel @brendelbored.bsky.social · 30/04/2025
If you’re too young to remember 9/11, one of the things about the subsequent 3-4 years if if you lived by The World’s Biggest Fork, people would be like “we need to be careful, that fork could be a target, terrorists hate our fork”
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