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Pivo

@bautanist.bsky.social
669 followers 216 following 577 posts

More stressed out by all this than he appears and also whiter Pivo wuz here ↓ bsky.app/profile/did:plc:2fabfdib5f…

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Pivo @bautanist.bsky.social · 04/10/2026
That kid looks green screened in, this can't be real, right?
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Mr. Bea Arthur, Batshit Crazy™️ @steamymac.bsky.social · 04/10/2026
Me: This is the worst. Tomorrow: Wrong.
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Mr. Bea Arthur, Batshit Crazy™️ @steamymac.bsky.social · 04/10/2026
*at the bottom of the ocean This is nice.
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Pivo @bautanist.bsky.social · 03/10/2026
One day a year we should be allowed to shine lasers at planes
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Pivo @bautanist.bsky.social · 03/10/2026
One day a year we should be allowed to shine lasers at planes
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The Onion @theonion.com · 01/10/2026
Dude Wipes Introduces New Flushable Khakis theonion.com/dude-wipes-introduces-…
Dude Wipes Introduces New Flushable Khakis
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Pivo @bautanist.bsky.social · 01/10/2026
Can we combine water treatment facilities with data centers? Can they evaporate my pee away? Please?
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Jerry Chen @jcsalterego.bsky.social · 29/09/2026
they should invent a google maps integration that detects if you're trying to run errands when a nearby school is letting out and slaps you in the face
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Frovo @frovo.bsky.social · 29/09/2026
DATE: what are you thinking about ME: fall should be spelled fa// DATE: ME: DATE: fell should be spelled fe_ _ *we kiss*
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Elizabeth Cronise McLaughlin @ecmclaughlin.bsky.social · 29/09/2026
You have to wait until the sixth paragraph of this piece before you learn, in the New York Times reporting on the murder of THEIR OWN EMPLOYEE, that the victim was a trans man who had been abused for being trans by the in-laws who murdered him. www.nytimes.com/2026/09/28/u...
nytimes.com
Couple Accused of Killing Their Son-in-Law in Bay Area Park (Gift Article)
Jonathan McKinsey, an engineer who worked in the games department for The New York Times, was fatally shot Saturday in a San Francisco suburb. The police have accused his parents-in-law, both 76.
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sweetie π @sixfeetofcandy.bsky.social · 29/09/2026
“but it’s national coffee day” i sob, after the barista refuses to put me through the bean grinder
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Luke O'Neil @lukeoneil47.bsky.social · 28/09/2026
Every college in this country decided that expelling and/or sending the police to beat the shit out of their own students for the crime of being opposed to genocide was their top priority. That and giving Trump complete control of what they teach. Contrast that with how they treat rapists.
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Viktor Winetrout @viktorwinetrout.bsky.social · 26/09/2026
“Excuse me while I slip into something more comfortable,” I say, breaking the karmic cycle of rebirth
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DC Pierson @dcpierson.bsky.social · 25/09/2026
Why is no one having kids? GAS PRICES. Today it cost me over $100 to fill up my child
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Gretchen @wokkax3.bsky.social · 24/09/2026
Have never seen a rock squirrel in this tree before. Saw him out the window and briefly thought Greg had been in some kind of accident.
Rock squirrel that’s black on top, pale around the eyes, and has kind of a speckled gray bottom half.
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Ben Collins @bencollins.bsky.social · 21/09/2026
Outside the obvious timebomb of selling out trans kids to appeal to ~16 bigots in deep Ohio, an underplayed part of the whole "trans kids in youth sports" stuff is making the most psycho Little League parents the most important political demo in America. They're joy vampires for the kids themselves!
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Strughoulo @struggalo.bsky.social · 20/09/2026
You wouldn't know my girlfriend. She goes to a different end stage capitalism.
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Braden Serkas @portmanteauface.bsky.social · 21/09/2026
Starting to suspect that, in a past life, I may have been a real dillhole
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jamelle @jamellebouie.net · 21/09/2026
this is a bit of an obsession of mine especially here in charlottesville. the cost of commercial real estate is prohibitive if you want to experiment and the city seems categorically opposed to small lots and small units that could allow people to start businesses without a huge capital investment
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lukelukeluke @lukelukeluke.bsky.social · 21/09/2026
Me: I’d like a slice of pizza Server: that comes with three sides Me: three slices of pizza Server, starting to sweat: what nine sides would you like with that Me: TAKE A WILD FUCKEN GUESS
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Pivo @bautanist.bsky.social · 18/09/2026
Please, only my school teachers called me Mountain Everest
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Pivo @bautanist.bsky.social · 18/09/2026
Please, only my school teachers called me Mountain Everest
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Skinnie Talls @skinnietalls.bsky.social · 14/09/2026
On a scale of one to ten, what the hell is going on?
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blank @misterblank.bsky.social · 12/09/2026
awfully nice of barbers not to cut our ears off.
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chris. @azedand2knots.bsky.social · 11/09/2026
I think I am accidentally wearing my "only talk to me if you have weird shit to say about everything" pants again.
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chris. @azedand2knots.bsky.social · 11/09/2026
If you just want a chance to say words out loud, don't talk to the dark because it isn't afraid to listen.
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headless horseDan @etbeeegood.bsky.social · 10/09/2026
Grievy™️, the #1 funeral gravy
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Better Things Are Possible @internethippo.bsky.social · 07/09/2026
Antebellum politics is fascinating, the South kept getting policy concessions and whipped themselves up into a paranoid rage anyway, essentially because they couldn't stand being culturally judged for having slaves
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Evan Greer @evangreer.bsky.social · 04/09/2026
Age verification makes everyone less safe. Age verification makes everyone less safe. Age verification makes everyone less safe. Age verification makes everyone less safe. Age verification makes everyone less safe. Age verification makes everyone less safe.
techdirt.com
Hackers Had A Live Feed Of Every ID This Verification Company Scanned. For Over A Year.
From the very beginning of this recent obsession with identifying everyone online (yes, they like to call it "age" verification, but it always ends up as identity verification), we've been pointing out that it was a huge privacy nightmare waiting to happen. Or maybe it wasn't waiting. Maybe it was already happening. This week a...
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mcc @dryad.technology · 01/09/2026
Hey remember that time around when the LHC turned on that physicists discovered particles moving faster than the speed of light. And then realized actually no one of the cables in the detector was just shorter than it was supposed to be
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VeGOREpunk AuHORROR @vegapunk-aurora.bsky.social · 01/09/2026
*Mr Beast voice* I HELPED THIS WOMAN TURN A ROOM FULL OF STRAW INTO GOLD USING ONLY A SPINNING WHEEL! IF SHE CAN'T GUESS MY NAME IN THREE DAYS, I'M TAKING HER BABY!
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gwen 🌶️👹 @gwenpepperoni.myatproto.social · 01/09/2026
buddy thats between you and the potatoes
why I fork my roast potatoes

fork them
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Jerry Chen @jcsalterego.bsky.social · 01/09/2026
imagine being able to have coffee after 3PM and not facing Repercussions
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Pivo @bautanist.bsky.social · 08/07/2026
Just think how many desalination plants this could power!
News article reading
Japan's new power plant mixes saltwater + freshwater = UNLIMITED clean electricity! No sun or wind needed. Scientists say this could power 15% of Earth's energy needs just from river mouths alone!
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Tusk Jenkins @tuskjenkins.bsky.social · 29/08/2026
Don't ever let anyone tell you where your wires go. You've got the perfect maze of loops and decoys already please believe me, I work in IT. I'm also a life coach and also also a minotaur
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Pivo @bautanist.bsky.social · 27/08/2026
I don't want AL anywhere near my fingers, that's how they get fused together
The website for a TCL android tablet called the A1 that boasts about ai integration but they have misspelled ai as AL in a heading
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Kip Conlon @kipconlon.bsky.social · 23/08/2026
There must have been some miscommunication because I said SPECIFICALLY no alarms or dye packs.
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Opinion Editor @ Bluesky @dly.bsky.social · 24/08/2026
a perfect summation of the tech broligarchy
“These people long for immortality but can't wait ten minutes for a cup of coffee," she says.
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Pivo @bautanist.bsky.social · 23/08/2026
Family comes before work, 8:20am
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derek guy @dieworkwear.bsky.social · 21/08/2026
People tell me they like suits but don't have occasions to wear one. You can wear a suit to court, funerals, and religious services. Doesn't have to be your trial, friend's burial, or religion you believe in. Go to random trials, attend a stranger's burial, join multiple religions. Try it sometime.
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Frovo @frovo.bsky.social · 21/08/2026
row row row your boat c c c o o o l l l u u u m m m n n n y o u r b o a t
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𝙣𝙖𝙥𝙤𝙡𝙚𝙤𝙣 𝙫𝙚𝙜𝙚𝙢𝙞𝙩𝙚™ @napveg.bsky.social · 19/08/2026
asking my date if she wants to lady and the tramp a tube of chocolate chip cookie dough
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Johnny Normality (Spooky Mode) @probgobl.in · 17/08/2026
Microwaving an unopened can of tuna for fifteen minutes and using the break room fire extinguisher to fight those who do not share my vision.
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CrazyMyra @outonthemoors.bsky.social · 17/08/2026
One of my favourite tweets
Noodles
(@Dawn_M_)

Calm down shouty museum man. I think it's pretty obvious that I know how to ride a dinosaur skeleton.

7:31 PM. Feb 11,2015
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Ashley @ashleysays.bsky.social · 17/08/2026
So they found it
News+
BBC Science FOCus MAGAZINE
We're finally unlocking the biggest mysteries of the human clitoris
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Bran 9 From Outer Space @bransonreese.bsky.social · 16/08/2026
Were I a king sitting down to feast and one of my most embittered servants made eye contact with me and proposed a toast "to your health" I would happily take a sip of wine from my goblet which only moments earlier sat far outside of my narrow field of vision
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Pivo @bautanist.bsky.social · 14/08/2026
Fingernails are exoskeleton, bugs were right and we're just playing catch-up
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Pivo @bautanist.bsky.social · 13/08/2026
As a professor, saying "you can trust me on this one" every 3rd to 5th slide
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Luke Plunkett @lukeplunkett.com · 13/08/2026
every time i see these posts i think its a psyop you cannot open threads and scroll 5 posts without suffering a brain injury. nobody online or irl you ever talk to uses it. they are tricking insta users into clicking on threads links and generating profiles for everyone, that's it
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