Reposted by Aidan Wake🦊 🩵🐦⬛ Fox & Crow, for Bartleby Endeavors 🎥 @foxy99.bsky.social · 11hWhen I die my buttplug will shoot out at terrifying speed to be followed by a large mound of violets. 094
Reposted by Aidan WakeMoby Dick @mobydickatsea.bsky.social · 12hYea, foolish mortals, Noah’s flood is not yet subsided; two thirds of the fair world it yet covers. 211627
Reposted by Aidan WakeResident Warren G. Harding @popeawesomexiii.bsky.social · 28/09/2026Me: So what are you planning after you finish your residency? Evil: 1248
Aidan Wake @aidanwake.bsky.social · 11hImagine it in a more pissed drunk David Attenborough accent, 🥳 110
Aidan Wake @aidanwake.bsky.social · 12hHorrible spine m’lord, dare I say built as shittily as your trucks <coughs> 140
Reposted by Aidan WakeI've got a dad back @dadback.bsky.social · 13/09/2026I've decided that half-assing things is too much, so I'm cutting back to quarter-assing 03217
Reposted by Aidan WakeBogey @oneyebogey.bsky.social · 20/09/2025How can I skeet at a time like this. 515278
Reposted by Aidan WakeJake_Vig @jakevig.bsky.social · 12hIf anyone finds my ventriloquist dummy, please return it to me, ideally before he goes on one of his murderous rampages. 56821
Reposted by Aidan Wake🏴☠️ Jollyrobber 🏴☠️ @jollyrobber.bsky.social · 22/12/2024Who up ironing they maiden 1031788
Aidan Wake @aidanwake.bsky.social · 12hmf builds spines as well as he does cars - many ppl are saying 000
Reposted by Aidan WakeSolomon @solomonrmissouri.com · 12hWe must all suffer and behold our big backed overlordstatic.klipy.comFire ElmoALT: Fire Elmo 4273
Aidan Wake @aidanwake.bsky.social · 12hAgain, I maintain this is why ass whippings should be applied to adults when deserved. 041
Reposted by Aidan WakeLydia! ⭐ @lydiastaremoji.bsky.social · 17hliberty mutual advertisement induced psychosis 49628
Reposted by Aidan WakeJake_Vig @jakevig.bsky.social · 12hThis reminds me of that one time that things also completely sucked. 25210
Reposted by Aidan WakeTwoSense @twosense.bsky.social · 12haren’t we all just avoiding life while waiting for life 99428
Reposted by Aidan WakeSalty MacTavish @saltymactavish.bsky.social · 12hI’m sorry – I need to take this call. It’s my undertaker 1113151
Reposted by Aidan Wake🧩 @holojester.bsky.social · 12hdo you ever put your pajamas on in the dark and wake up wearing oven mitts and a tortilla? 5235
Reposted by Aidan Wakesweetie π @sixfeetofcandy.bsky.social · 17h“but it’s national coffee day” i sob, after the barista refuses to put me through the bean grinder 625256
Reposted by Aidan WakeCoffee&CannabisClub-𝐀𝐠𝐚𝐦𝐊𝐜𝐮𝐟 @coffeecannabisclub.bsky.social · 13hWhy is the government worried about their privacy while selling yours to the lowest bidder? 1133
Reposted by Aidan WakeLeeroystarr @leeroystarr.bsky.social · 13hI went to a restaurant called Karma, there’s no menu, you just get what you deserve. 23113
Reposted by Aidan Wake🎃 Ryan S. Pumpkins 🎃 (Any Questions?) @ryanwritesgood.bsky.social · 13h<slaps the side of an iron maiden> This baby right here, takes a little more effort on your part but the screams are so much more satisfying 011
Reposted by Aidan WakeLindsey Botts @lkbotts.bsky.social · 14hJunk science strikes again! 🌎sierraclub.orgCan Killing Wolves Save the Beef Industry?Experts warn that a new executive order meant to help ranchers won't actually work 064
Reposted by Aidan WakeGef the Toking Mongoose @geftokingmongoose.bsky.social · 13hLittle guy got all fucked up on schnapps and now he can't get out of my backyard 59912
Reposted by Aidan WakeResident Warren G. Harding @popeawesomexiii.bsky.social · 21/09/2026Reminder you cannot spell CHRIST without CIS and HRT 211616
Aidan Wake @aidanwake.bsky.social · 13h<slaps the side of a volcano> You can fit so many rapists in here 1165
Reposted by Aidan WakeZomBean @bigbeannrg.bsky.social · 15hThat feeling when you stretch yourself into another dimension 13116
Reposted by Aidan WakeResident Warren G. Harding @popeawesomexiii.bsky.social · 25/09/2026A commercial for butter played in front of a YouTube video and it ended with the tagline "Eat it like you own it" and folks, I am not getting into heaven. 13611
Reposted by Aidan Wakesweetie π @sixfeetofcandy.bsky.social · 16hyeah, i know what’s going on that’s the problem 011756
Reposted by Aidan Wake𝔏𝔦𝔳𝔢 𝔏𝔞𝔲𝔤𝔥 𝔏𝔬𝔞𝔱𝔥𝔢 @fleurkenstein.bsky.social · 13hI prefer uncut men because nothing feels better on a cold winters night than snuggling up in the old foreskin 🤌🏼 2307
Reposted by Aidan WakeOld School Gentleman @oldschoolgentl1.bsky.social · 14hI grew up in the 70s when actions still had consequences. If I ever laid my hands on a woman, I would have gotten my arm broken. 061
Reposted by Aidan WakeThe Onion @theonion.com · 09/09/2025It Only Tuesday theonion.com/it-only-tuesday-181956… 159103612862
Reposted by Aidan Wakeno great matter @itsabigail.bsky.social · 29/09/2026imagine being Case Keenum, being 38 years old, playing in an NFL game for the first time in years, you’re tired as shit, and then you gotta run to the radio station to record American Top 40 2335425
Reposted by Aidan WakeOutspoken™️ @out5p0ken.bsky.social · 29/09/2026Black folks don’t hang themselves from trees. 280130534345
Reposted by Aidan WakeBEAVE @beaveinflow.bsky.social · 27/09/2026After extensive research and a sufficiently large sample size, I’ve determined that I don’t like men anymore. 3314630
Reposted by Aidan Wakecap’n watsisname @capnwatsisname.bsky.social · 29/09/2026A WEREWOLF WHO TURNS ON THE WAXING CRESCENT MOON: Haha guys i just realized what tonight is and we kinda need to solve this escape room faster 19727
Reposted by Aidan Wakeanton lestrange @hugemclarge.bsky.social · 29/09/2026you can posit whatever position you like. the fact remains that brown sugar and cinnamon pop tarts are the only true path to enlightenment 2249
Aidan Wake @aidanwake.bsky.social · 29/09/2026No, I’m not posting another selfie if that is how you’re gonna be. I’m not a piece of meat Chad. 041
Aidan Wake @aidanwake.bsky.social · 29/09/2026<takes a drag off of cigarette> Me: (thoughtfully) look I’d feel much better about everything if I woke up at age 12 tomorrow, all I’m saying. Therapist: …I think we’d a lot of us would wish for a do-over. M: Crazy we build a society where the collective conscious screams for a reset. T: … 010
Reposted by Aidan WakeAhhhhh @nerdjpg.com · 29/09/2026Sorry I just need to take a few years to think about everything 142548