iiinova — where your digital self keeps evolving

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alias goes here @meanoldbitch.bsky.social · 14h

My birthday is this month you guys. All I really want is a job. Shit’s fucking dismal.

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Ygrene @ygrene.bsky.social · 30/09/2026

when there were only one set of footprints in the sand, my child, that is when i was showing you how i could dunk from the free throw line

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🅱️oofessor Killosk 👻🔪 @professorkiosk.wtf · 10h

how can we be sure that anything is butter

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alias goes here @meanoldbitch.bsky.social · 11h

Kid just informed me that he needs a pink shirt for an assembly TOMORROW and really the the timing couldn’t be better because I am already poor, behind on literally everything, and stressed to the max

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alias goes here @meanoldbitch.bsky.social · 14h

My birthday is this month you guys. All I really want is a job. Shit’s fucking dismal.

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alias goes here @meanoldbitch.bsky.social · 14h

Do you guys have these creepy surveillance cameras all over the place where you live, too? The one at the grocery store makes me laugh the hardest because it makes these creepy PA announcements reminding you that the area is under constant surveillance and it feels like something out of sci-fi

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chris. @azedand2knots.bsky.social · 20/09/2026

If you put your ear just below my ribcage, you can hear the cauldron I swallowed whole bubble and boil.

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skeeter devilpenis @guypussy.bsky.social · 29/09/2026

(Squirt executive with his head in his hands) ITS NOT PEE ITS GRAPEFRUIT SODA

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Kat Abughazaleh @katmabu.bsky.social · 29/09/2026

I literally don’t know a single woman who hasn’t been raped, stalked, groped, harassed, or sexually violated in some way at some point in their life. If you choose to doubt and dox survivors, just know every woman in your life is disgusted by you.

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alias goes here @meanoldbitch.bsky.social · 29/09/2026

I am behind in everything, my bank account is overdrawn. I’m afraid my cell phone and my child’s are about to be shut off and with DoorDash I can barely make enough for food for the day and to cover the gas. I need a JOB!!! 😭

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Dan Cerinthedark @etbeeegood.bsky.social · 29/09/2026

you ever feel the spirit u had is crushed forever but have to fake it for like 20 more yrs

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alias goes here @meanoldbitch.bsky.social · 29/09/2026

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mindflakes @mindflakes.bsky.social · 28/09/2026

Most people don't expect you to fire a trebuchet at their house, that's what makes it such a fun surprise

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Undead Kat, The Oracle Near Delphi Falls. @originallabgrrl.bsky.social · 28/09/2026

My son was told about affirmative consent his entire life, so much so that I was wrestling with the cat which was growling at me (not seriously and she was a cat who growled when she was playing also when she ate food) and my toddler son told me that the cat said no. That shit's not hard to teach.

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Skinnie Talls @skinnietalls.bsky.social · 28/09/2026

I'm not going to lie, would you accept an elaborate excuse instead?

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alias goes here @meanoldbitch.bsky.social · 29/09/2026

Every once in a while when I order like a sandwich or a coffee or something instead of the person writing my name on it, they’ll write “GOAT” or #23, which I think is really funny and clever

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sweetie π @sixfeetofcandy.bsky.social · 28/09/2026

hey kids, if any of you have a reverse uno card that you could play for humanity that’d be great

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Uncle Duke @uncleduke1969.bsky.social · 28/09/2026

*sticks pinky out*

Sign on wall reads "Please urinate with precision and elegance." (Chinese translation above)

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NosferaPru @prufrockluvsong.bsky.social · 28/09/2026

Please stop calling me on my phone that's not what it's for

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DaddyJew @daddyjew.bsky.social · 28/09/2026

Date: i wanna be with someone who really brings something to the table Waiter: i have a order of lemon pepper wings Me: you son of a bitch

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𝙱𝚊𝚋𝚎 𝚁𝚞𝚝𝚑𝚕𝚎𝚜𝚜 @unfitz.bsky.social · 28/09/2026

[Jaime and Cersei Lannister kiss passionately] J: Let’s take this to the bedroom. After you. C: No, you first. I incest.

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alias goes here @meanoldbitch.bsky.social · 28/09/2026

Imagine you hire a contractor and they pull up in this fucking thing. I would fire them immediately. (Yes I removed the name of the business because I’m not giving this asshole free advertising.)

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FᎪᎢ ᏩᎪNᎠᎪᏞF @sofarrsogud.bsky.social · 28/09/2026

Yes, obviously it's a tuxedo t-shirt. We're at a wedding, Sharon.

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BEAVE @beaveinflow.bsky.social · 28/09/2026

Heartburn is your body quietly preparing you for your final form as a fire-breathing dragon with terrible gastrointestinal health.

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alias goes here @meanoldbitch.bsky.social · 28/09/2026

You ever been so broke that your email is going to stop working? Well, I am. Can’t afford the $2.99 😭😭

Screenshot of an email that reads “You're out of email storage
Your Gmail will stop working in 23 days
You've used all 15GB of the storage that comes with your Google Account. This means Google Photos, Google Drive, and device backup have stopped working. Your Gmail will also stop working in 23 days.
You'll need to either get more storage with a Google One membership or clean up space until your total storage usage is”

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alias goes here @meanoldbitch.bsky.social · 27/09/2026

I think that car washes have replaced vape shops as the newest money laundering fronts. There are like six car washes within three minutes of my house that have opened recently.

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alias goes here @meanoldbitch.bsky.social · 27/09/2026

Might say yes to the next person who asks me on a date just for a feee meal I didn’t have to cook.

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alias goes here @meanoldbitch.bsky.social · 14/12/2024

Going to be very upset if there isn’t a drag queen named Luigi Mangina by now.

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alias goes here @meanoldbitch.bsky.social · 15/05/2026

If I’m the one who picked up the food from the drive-through, I’m eating from everyone’s fries on the way home. I will try to be fair about it, but you must remember it is an art not a science.

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DaddyJew @daddyjew.bsky.social · 27/09/2026

*listening to house music* is this what it feels like to own a home?

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Jooli-AHH! Boolia 👻🍂🎃 @jooliaghoulia.bsky.social · 27/09/2026

Hi, I'm Joolia. I noticed we share a lot of the same reply guys, so I thought I'd introduce myself

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cait (and adonis) @cait.bsky.social · 27/09/2026

if this horrible little thing and its cursed amulet come near me I'm going to beat it with a bat actually

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🍁𝒮𝒶𝓈𝓈𝓎 𝒢𝒾𝓇𝓁 🤍 @sassycanadian0.bsky.social · 27/09/2026

It's almost candy corn season for those of you that like to eat crayons.

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alias goes here @meanoldbitch.bsky.social · 26/09/2026

You have to be the most diabolical type of scum to leave your baby’s dirty diaper perched on a light pole like this in a parking lot. Like you’re worse than the pieces of shit who don’t return their shopping carts

A wrapped up baby diaper, which is presumably used perched on the pedestal of a light pole in a parking lot

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alias goes here @meanoldbitch.bsky.social · 26/09/2026

I need a job! I’m smart and good at lots of things. Can you hire me??!?

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alias goes here @meanoldbitch.bsky.social · 26/09/2026

“Wherefore art thou, Juliet” is today’s “u up?”

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rebar mcentire? @rebarmcentire.bsky.social · 26/09/2026

show similar to Is It Cake? but it's called Is It Poison? and only one person survives

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alias goes here @meanoldbitch.bsky.social · 26/09/2026

The term “hamburger meat” makes my skin crawl.

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Dan Cerinthedark @etbeeegood.bsky.social · 25/09/2026

butt crack perfect shape to hold a taco. Coincidence?

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alias goes here @meanoldbitch.bsky.social · 25/09/2026

Hi, my name is Jordan and one fun fact about me is I can already tell which of you in this room are cunts.

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alias goes here @meanoldbitch.bsky.social · 25/09/2026

I haven’t heard Taylor Swift new song, but as the best indicator future behavior is past behavior, I can deduce that. It’s her whining about being bullied in some way even though she’s a 40-year-old billionaire.

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alias goes here @meanoldbitch.bsky.social · 25/09/2026