iiinova — where your digital self keeps evolving

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I'm Gary Suarez of CABBAGES @imgarysuarez.bsky.social · 8h

DOOM HANGS DONG?!?!?!

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as always when this is posted, i have to fondly remember the time someone stole this tweet word for word, including using my name as the punchline, then claimed it was just independent discovery

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Jon Bois @jonbois.bsky.social · 29/09/2026

i wish baseball teams could resolve their differences without resorting to baseball

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mattie lubchansky @mattielubchansky.com · 29/09/2026

very weird thing about being "in public online" for like, 15 whole years now is sometimes you'll run into a person who fully has a tulpa of you living in their home. and the problem is that the tulpa is not pulling its weight around the house and that person is now mad at ME for some reason

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cait (and adonis) @cait.bsky.social · 29/09/2026

the official bag of people who don't care which team wins they just want everyone to go out there and have fun

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Thomas Ha @thomasha.bsky.social · 29/09/2026

this short story is called, "the conspiracy is spreading and we are all going to jail"

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Thomas Ha @thomasha.bsky.social · 29/09/2026

i should clarify, when i write people doing bad things, it's because i am bad. they are me. more importantly, when you read about those bad things, they also become you. that's how story works. in fact, you are going to think about murder before this skeet ends. how's that feel, sicko.

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Darpo @darpo42.bsky.social · 28/09/2026

I am the one who gets knocked-up!

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Mina Kimes @minakimes.bsky.social · 27/09/2026

Unironically the PNW mindset lol

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more mr. nice guy @juniorhoncho.bsky.social · 19/09/2026

my point is, piers morgan should interview a dog

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autojainaphile @heartles.xyz · 26/09/2026

i would think twice before accosting me, lest i screenshot our interaction and send it to my network of 50-100 terminally online marxist-leninists

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Haus of Decline @hausofdecline.bsky.social · 25/09/2026

No joke, Moral OCD was ruining my life and making me unbearably despondent, but I've been able to get through it by "Larry Daviding," where any time I do something less than noble, I play the Curb Your Enthusiasm theme in my head and accept the comedy of my pettiness.

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Gwen C. Katz @gwenckatz.bsky.social · 25/09/2026

Fuck ChatGPT flyers. The future is broadsheets.

A crowded broadsheet with way too many fonts. It says:
Forget ChatGPT Flyers
Say it with
Broadsheets
Unlimited fonts
Stretch them
Or cram a really long sentence into one line for no good reason
No whitespace
Mix capital and lowercase
Pointing hands
(They're called manicules!)
Don't be left behind
Broadsheets are the future

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Thembo @thembo.bsky.social · 26/09/2026

Conversely, cracking open some gas station dick pills and washing them down with a 5 hour energy at an interview is a power move they'll fear and respect.

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shawn @mulchy.bsky.social · 25/09/2026

kinda feels like the time to say something was before charging people with phony crimes for protesting and then waging an elaborate conspiracy to cover up prosecutorial misconduct but who asked me?

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Jeff Bachtel @jeffbach.bsky.social · 25/09/2026

Where do I work? Funny you should ask, but Diagnostic Laboratory Services. And no this is not a normal interview, it's your liver panel

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rax ‘levon honkers’ king @raxkingisdead.bsky.social · 25/09/2026

(me, next in line to be interviewed after you, spaghetti bolognese spilling out of every pocket of my cargo pants) he's right you look like an asshole

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Bruno Dias @brunodias.dev · 25/09/2026

Bsky is remarkable because you can see a dumb news article, think “no way anyone behaves like that, only a jackass could care about this” and then some dude you’ve never heard of with a blue check and 150k followers will post “it’s me I’m jackass”

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merritt @merrittk.com · 25/09/2026

i heard woke is trying to do same-sex bathrooms now... they want our sons pissing next to each other to turn them gay

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shaun @shaunvids.bsky.social · 24/09/2026

join the military, you get to starve on a rusting ship that repeatedly sails into and out of the range of enemy missiles in order to manipulate gambling websites where people bet on your death

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Ellsworth Online @ellsworth29.bsky.social · 24/09/2026

chat, do we think the pivot is working

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lauren @lauren.rotatingsandwiches.com · 24/09/2026

ME: CSGO skins? TF2 hats? ANUBIS: ME: ANUBIS: We can talk about a side deal for the hats after

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lauren @lauren.rotatingsandwiches.com · 24/09/2026

ME: So I can't put anything else on the scale? ANUBIS: No. Just your heart ME: No money, no good deeds? ANUBIS: No ME: What about steam points? I've got a ton of steam points ANUBIS: The point is to be lighter than the feather ME: I was just hoping to finally do something with the steam points

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Stella Sacco @antlervel.vet · 24/09/2026

As I’ve said before, people told me “you can just be a woman if you want to.” What they did not tell me, and what I’ve discovered the past few years of my transition, is that you have to *keep* becoming her

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Chris Bratt @chrisbratt.bsky.social · 24/09/2026

In recent years, the media has quietly begun to change the way in which it writes about Bobby Kotick, the former CEO of Activision Blizzard. PMG investigates how Kotick used the threat of defamation to reshape his legacy in the games business, one article at a time. www.youtube.com/watch?v=kKwp...

youtube.com

Inside Bobby Kotick's Campaign Against the Press

YouTube video by People Make Games

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November Kelly @postoctobrist.bsky.social · 23/09/2026

weirdest thing about Trump is he’s gay (Mamdani, ‘big strong guys,’ etc) but also a straight pedophile on the side. He’s like the opposite of an Ancient Greek

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phil @philjamesson.com · 23/09/2026

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Jännät @jaennaet.fi · 23/09/2026

5 drawings of the different types of "morning star" club weapons, and then spiky-haired Nancy at the left end

morningstar image source: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Morning_star_(weapon)#/media/File:Morgenstern_(137936355).jpg

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sarah jeong @sarahjeong.bsky.social · 23/09/2026

so like every now and then a Chosen Passenger receives correct information and somehow it's relayed to hundreds of other people who choose to trust the waterstained arial font printout over the emails with the BA logo, because we all know better

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sarah jeong @sarahjeong.bsky.social · 23/09/2026

the way the information is disseminating is genuinely perplexing. the hotel appears to be as confused by BA as we are and when we asked if the pickup time was correct the reassurance they had on offer was that another passenger had gotten ahold of BA on the phone to confirm bsky.app/profile/oldr...

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sarah jeong @sarahjeong.bsky.social · 23/09/2026

lol like 40% of BA's official communications have conveyed false or logically impossible information. like at 9:40 we received an email that said buses would pick us up at 9:00. since early morning hotel has had a printed sign out that the passengers of the BA flight will get picked up at 11

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sarah jeong @sarahjeong.bsky.social · 23/09/2026

just remembered that we only got on the buses because a passenger walked over and was like "hey i guess there are going to be buses over there, supposedly?" THERE WAS NEVER AN INTERCOM ANNOUNCEMENT OR A TEXT OR AN EMAIL OR ANYTHING LOL

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sarah jeong @sarahjeong.bsky.social · 22/09/2026

we have found our way out of the airport through a series of uniformed icelanders (airport employees?) telling us to not follow the directions in the british airways emails and get on the buses instead

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sarah jeong @sarahjeong.bsky.social · 22/09/2026

lol my flight got diverted because of a medical emergency and they landed us in reykjavik in the middle of the night and deplaned us and sent us through passport control and then the crew vanished and then british airways sent us links to book an overnight hotel room but for a hotel at heathrow

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Digital Poppy Poppy Zone @poppyzone.bsky.social · 23/09/2026

I promise this isn't the actual title screen I just had an itch I had to scratch

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laura “thirty years old” cavegift @cavegift.bsky.social · 21/09/2026

[into mirror] yeah. obviously. obviously portland oregon needs another thirty year old chuuni tgirl.

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Ben Collins @bencollins.bsky.social · 20/09/2026

elite spam

An account called FORD TRUCKS asking “hey man have you ever wished to have a truck”

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Magnum, T.I.(M.) @hydrationchimp.bsky.social · 19/09/2026

you did the meme, poindexter

@dril
the wise man bowed his head solemnly and spoke: "theres actually zero difference between good & bad things. you imbecile. you fucking moron"

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JP @jpbrammer.bsky.social · 19/09/2026

sometimes I get bored and cancel myself on Threads by saying whatever the fuck

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USER WAS BLOCKED FOR THIS POST @blockedforthispost.bsky.social · 19/09/2026

is it possible to bait the "user was blocked for this post" account into posting whatever i want?

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Haus of Decline @hausofdecline.bsky.social · 18/09/2026

I sorta soft-launched it, but I'm not going by Alex no more. I am Katie now.

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Gigan #VoteXenolhu @drillknight.bsky.social · 17/09/2026

A personal favorite

professor x: whats your superpower?
ostrich: i lay big egg
professor x [telepathically to x-men]: i can save us money on breakfast
ostrich [telepathically]: egg no for sale

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The Space Pope @popecrocodylus.bsky.social · 18/09/2026

Not bad, but this one is my favorite:

@prettyliltakemachine

Welcome new students. My name is Charles Xavier. The world around you will judge people like us for our differences, but at this school we seek to teach you to harness - who thought that. I do not look like Mr. Clean's gay brother. Who thought that."

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Cheez 🖤 comms closed! @ricecakehomie.bsky.social · 18/09/2026

This is immediately going into my vocab

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autojainaphile @heartles.xyz · 18/09/2026

the virgin "let's release a brand new retro version of our mmo" vs the chad "never shut down the original to begin with, mmos 1 2 and 3 are all receiving updates in parallel" play guild wars 2 muy liege

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Katie Tightpussy, Editor-In-Chief @katie.bzky.team · 17/09/2026

i have had multiple "oh you haven't heard about cumming in the fluffer?" conversations in the past few weeks which is not great for myself or for others

the xkcd average familiarity comic of two people talking, edited to read: "ai doomsday religions are second nature to us very online folk, so it's easy to forget that the average person probably only knows about the harry potter sex cult and one or two aella cognitohazards" "and sankeys, of course" "of course" captioned below "even when they're trying to compensate for it, experts in anything wildly overestimate the average person's familiarity with their field

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