iiinova — where your digital self keeps evolving

ObsidianShiv @obsidianshiv.bsky.social · 11h

Computer, John Harvey Kellogg bouncing on it crazy style in a catsuit. Computer.... corn flakes, rule 34.

172

Reposted by ObsidianShiv

Patrick Monahan @pattymo.com · 26/09/2026

Thanks to the awesome power of AI, I no longer know my home address

13115095

Reposted by ObsidianShiv

Salty MacTavish @saltymactavish.bsky.social · 22/09/2026

Looks like a nor’easter’s heading our way, Margaret. Best fetch in more wood and charge up the sex toys

2224577

Reposted by ObsidianShiv

Reverie @augustreverie.bsky.social · 21/09/2026

haha I hate it

8473

ObsidianShiv @obsidianshiv.bsky.social · 19/09/2026

Update: these mushrooms are called alaskan gold and are maturing.

Mushrooms that look like theyre...fuck..smiling? Wtf

041

ObsidianShiv @obsidianshiv.bsky.social · 18/09/2026

(Tells my 9yo not to do something extremely dangerous and stupid) 9yo: this is by far the most egregious and inhumane thing to happen to a human being. I will never find happiness, nor will I ever forgive you for taking that away from me.

3185

ObsidianShiv @obsidianshiv.bsky.social · 13/09/2026

Anyone know what kind of mushrooms these are?

083

ObsidianShiv @obsidianshiv.bsky.social · 08/09/2026

I stepped out to smoke with my wife on this dark, rainy night. I asked, "should I do it?". "It doesn't seem like it's going to stop raining," she said. I reluctantly turned on my phone light and hauled the trash bags to the dumpster, nimbly hopping over puddles. Psychic test complete.

073

ObsidianShiv @obsidianshiv.bsky.social · 03/09/2026

My math teacher from 7th grade broke her foot "dropping a bar of soap on it in the shower" and gave birth 9 months later. I've always what really happened. Like, did they keep going after she slipped? Or did it happen during? Idk man.

061

ObsidianShiv @obsidianshiv.bsky.social · 02/09/2026

Tornado doc: the Johnson family cat was found impaling a concrete highway barricade 54 miles from their home...

030

ObsidianShiv @obsidianshiv.bsky.social · 02/09/2026

Headed to Washington on Friday to see my dad one last time. Emotions be mixed my dudes.

4150

Reposted by ObsidianShiv

Canadian Bacon @tashaneedshelp.bsky.social · 31/08/2026

Tie him to the bed, then eat cheese on a chair in the corner.

118630

ObsidianShiv @obsidianshiv.bsky.social · 31/08/2026

Eight dogs walk into a bar... Bartender: where the fuck did these dogs come from Baha men: omg I am so sorry

0173

Reposted by ObsidianShiv

Shimmy @aslightshimmy.bsky.social · 23/08/2026

More and more and more it’s fuck everybody else.

2167

Reposted by ObsidianShiv

TwoSense @twosense.bsky.social · 23/08/2026

not to be too political but my left boob is a little bigger

4426044

ObsidianShiv @obsidianshiv.bsky.social · 23/08/2026

If you say cunt three times in the mirror and turn off the light. A jacked kangaroo will appear and drown you in the bathtub. Im trying it tonight, wish me luck.

093

Reposted by ObsidianShiv

mike☺︎ (scary joe armstrong) @m1keonl1ne.bsky.social · 23/08/2026

my left ball hangs lower for political reasons

34416

ObsidianShiv @obsidianshiv.bsky.social · 23/08/2026

I wish there were even smaller mosquitoes that bit mosquitoes

39534

Reposted by ObsidianShiv

Paranormal Pandy 🎃 @thatbrenna.bsky.social · 23/07/2025

Host: Let's play Wheel Of Ornithology! Me: Are there any jays? Host: No sorry Me: I'd like to buy an owl

351274366

ObsidianShiv @obsidianshiv.bsky.social · 17/08/2026

Hmu if you're a mutant with a Kangaroo pouch that can hold 200 lbs.

42611

ObsidianShiv @obsidianshiv.bsky.social · 06/07/2026

Old country music: I murdered a cop because he knew too much. New country music: I back the blue and accidentally put salt in my coffee because I cant read.

835673

ObsidianShiv @obsidianshiv.bsky.social · 03/07/2026

Country singers be like, "Drinkin and drivin' at 3 AM makin' out with my girl with a beer in my hand, after a long day on theeee farm" And their dad owns like 12 BMW dealers and a hotel chain.

510426

ObsidianShiv @obsidianshiv.bsky.social · 22/06/2026

My dad was joking tonight about how he shouldn't have to wear pants because he's dying. I fucking love this man.

3345

ObsidianShiv @obsidianshiv.bsky.social · 20/06/2026

New job after eight years of being a grunt. One month in and I have my own truck with my own laborer. My new bosses love me and I feel like I'm being punk'd

2130

ObsidianShiv @obsidianshiv.bsky.social · 17/06/2026

This is a serious book btw. Im a very serious person.

Willy commanded an apple appear on the ground, next to it appeared a tiny, festive looking man in green clothes. It opened its mouth as squelchy fart sounds emerged from its throat, seemingly greeting him. Every step spawned a new one, every fly that landed on them turned into one. One of them fell into the lava and the moat soon became a wriggling mass of mouth farting leprechauns. Green clothes and red beards began to fill the landscape, even falling from the sky as the tornadoes became infested.

Willy jumped up and down laughing and clapping like a child.

The landscape began to glitch, as if reality was flickering on and off. A loud hum could be heard raging from the sky as willy began to drown in piles of leprechauns, frantically throat farting. Then silence.

030

ObsidianShiv @obsidianshiv.bsky.social · 12/06/2026

"Omg im starving to deaf" "You meant starving to death" "What?"

07418

ObsidianShiv @obsidianshiv.bsky.social · 09/06/2026

The only man I've ever looked up to was given 6-12 months today from cancer caused by hepatitis C. A month ago he was healthy, mid 60s and working hard every day. I dont have many friends so I felt like I needed some support. My dad has been my rock from day one, I dont know how to process this.

18453

ObsidianShiv @obsidianshiv.bsky.social · 03/06/2026

🎵bringin' on the fart breeeaaak🎵 *farts*

0107

ObsidianShiv @obsidianshiv.bsky.social · 27/05/2026

If you pronounce "cairn" as "Karen", sto P.

2112

Reposted by ObsidianShiv

josh (oldfriend99) @oldfriend99.bsky.social · 26/05/2026

Dr. Doom is honestly a terrible name for a doctor

920422

Reposted by ObsidianShiv

Mr. Bea Arthur, Batshit Crazy™️ @steamymac.bsky.social · 26/05/2026

Any of you ladies have a disappointment fetish? I’m single.

69938

Reposted by ObsidianShiv

Lizzlepants 🐒 @lizzlepants.bsky.social · 21/05/2026

he’s a 10 but his flux capacitor burns when he pees

411440

Reposted by ObsidianShiv

PhantomDeeks 🫶 @deeks549.bsky.social · 26/05/2026

Bluesky is great if you want life advice from a picture of a cat

951283220

ObsidianShiv @obsidianshiv.bsky.social · 26/05/2026

The most extreme immigration law ever: deport the entire earth to the fertile crescent in the middle east.

072

ObsidianShiv @obsidianshiv.bsky.social · 23/05/2026

Pizza crust is weird. Like, here's a slab of perfectly blended hot ingredients to finish, your treat? Crusty, hard, flavorless, overcooked bread that tears up the already burnt roof of your mouth

160

ObsidianShiv @obsidianshiv.bsky.social · 20/05/2026

What if Quato came out of a foreskin

040

Reposted by ObsidianShiv

DaddyJew @daddyjew.bsky.social · 20/05/2026

Them: we’ll cross that bridge when we get to it Me, having already lit it on fire: ok

117463

ObsidianShiv @obsidianshiv.bsky.social · 18/05/2026

Did you know that you can save your bread heels in a freezer bag until you have enough to thaw, cube, drizzle in olive oil with salt and seasoning, bake at 300 until golden and just have custom croutons?

5195

ObsidianShiv @obsidianshiv.bsky.social · 11/05/2026

This song is just musical facial expressions. youtu.be/oUKZIlpKd44?...

031

Reposted by ObsidianShiv

los 🦦 @los-los.bsky.social · 11/05/2026

at the orgy pointing at everyone and asking: groupon?

413742

ObsidianShiv @obsidianshiv.bsky.social · 11/05/2026

Billionaire's toilets are just a hole that leads to a small room of starving, endangered aardvarks and bleach nozzles, probably.

074

Reposted by ObsidianShiv

Boochy Boo @frenchys-goldau.bsky.social · 11/05/2026

Can't, making popping sounds with my thumb and foreskin

231

Reposted by ObsidianShiv

Greg the Miller @gregthemiller.bsky.social · 11/05/2026

going to starbucks and ordering a mountain dew with a shot of espresso

1413740

ObsidianShiv @obsidianshiv.bsky.social · 11/05/2026

I think im old enough to publicly comment on posts from people I know as if nobody else can see them. Kind of like that time on Facebook when Earl started talking to my aunt Ronnie about the sex they used to have in the 70's.

050

ObsidianShiv @obsidianshiv.bsky.social · 11/05/2026

*adds butter to a blender full of cum* I didn't have milk but im making a cheese sauce Update: not enough fat, too much protein, it seperated really bad. Plz help. Google isn't working and keeps making me do captchas

021

Reposted by ObsidianShiv

Robert Flippo @booksellerbert.bsky.social · 10/05/2026

I don’t feel like I’m getting that much older and then I catch myself casually thinking things like “guess it’s time to trim my ear hair”

1174

Reposted by ObsidianShiv

Norm @chingerhook.bsky.social · 10/05/2026

🎶i wanna rock and roll all night and sleep for the next two days🎶

04519