Kip Conlon @kipconlon.bsky.social · 58mThough it's true they hold no sentimental value, I hang onto the emeralds just the same. 093
Kip Conlon @kipconlon.bsky.social · 5hYou are far, far too kind, but I thank you and have been your great fan for many years! To many more. And now wish to see documentary. 110
Kip Conlon @kipconlon.bsky.social · 7h“Quicksand” is misleading. It took over an hour to bring down our guide. 1298
Reposted by Kip ConlonJohn Carpenter’s The Alex Nevil @thealexnevil.bsky.social · 08/10/2026*brings pizza to knife fight *all are cauliflower crust *stabbed more than necessary 010136
Kip Conlon @kipconlon.bsky.social · 8hSam Nye, Depressed Private Eye: She had legs that went all the way from the floor to her pelvis. I'd seen a lot of dames before, and here was another one. 2142
Reposted by Kip ConlonCount Thotula @thotchev.cryptoanarchy.network · 20hApparently it's a tiktok trend for people to react to the benson bubblers like they are a relic of plague-era europe 4141
Reposted by Kip Conlon🎃EM-SCREAM-KAYVEE 🔪 @youremceekayvee.bsky.social · 04/07/2026The Girl With the Ernest Tattoo 1121828
Reposted by Kip Conlonwargen @funeralpig.bsky.social · 09/10/2026(grabbing different mushrooms off the forest floor and eating them) no you don’t have to identify them that’s a myth 117329
Reposted by Kip ConlonMary @anniemumary.bsky.social · 21hMy coworker announced her pregnancy with some cookies from a local bakery. Today she announced the baby’s gender with some cookies from a local bakery. I am wondering what else we can find out about this baby because this is going well.  331009108
Kip Conlon @kipconlon.bsky.social · 08/10/2026Newsflash: If the only song you know is “Monster Mash” you're not a real Bobby Pickett fan. 281
Kip Conlon @kipconlon.bsky.social · 08/10/2026Pedicures are nice but they should really have a second person there to feed you grapes. 0144
Kip Conlon @kipconlon.bsky.social · 08/10/2026Well. That’s enough of feeling sorry for myself. Time for a nap. 0153
Kip Conlon @kipconlon.bsky.social · 08/10/2026Until you visit the Smithsonian you don't truly grasp the sacrifices Fonzie made for us. 0145
Reposted by Kip ConlonFiona Applebees 🍎🐝 @fionaapplebs.bsky.social · 07/10/2026Imagine there’s no heaven, It's easy if you look around 624557
Kip Conlon @kipconlon.bsky.social · 08/10/2026The last person who called me a coward wound up in a hospital. Shingles, I think. 310727
Reposted by Kip ConlonChappell Ellison @chappelltracker.bsky.social · 08/10/2026I love how I wrote this and thought the world wasn't ready for it 213212
Reposted by Kip ConlonForrest Plump @nahyoudoit.bsky.social · 05/09/2026It’s always “your ADHD is bad” and never “I love how many subplots you’re able to fit in one story” 832085
Reposted by Kip ConlonReverie @augustreverie.bsky.social · 07/10/2026correctly pronouncing “caramel” hurts my soul in the same way that saying “vozz” instead of “vase” does 199925
Kip Conlon @kipconlon.bsky.social · 08/10/2026My Nonna won’t eat pasta made with sauce from a jar. Hope she likes cold cuts. 0101
Kip Conlon @kipconlon.bsky.social · 08/10/2026I’ve been kicked out of better places than this, but I really liked the vibe here. 0204
Kip Conlon @kipconlon.bsky.social · 07/10/2026I took her compliment of my haircut as a thickly veiled insult. 093
Kip Conlon @kipconlon.bsky.social · 07/10/2026I don't write poems for the money. I cash grandpa's checks for that. 2104
Reposted by Kip ConlonJerry Chen @jcsalterego.bsky.social · 07/10/2026"take a hike" joke's on you, exercise would be great for my mental health 2960266
Kip Conlon @kipconlon.bsky.social · 07/10/2026Another skywriter tragically lost to “Happy Anniversary.” 094
Kip Conlon @kipconlon.bsky.social · 07/10/2026To complete the illusion I open the door and thank the empty hall for my DiGiorno's. 1154
Reposted by Kip Conlonandy vs. @im-all-id.me · 26/09/2026It's really comin down out there (civilization) 262371465
Reposted by Kip ConlonFrovo @frovo.bsky.social · 02/10/2026it’s called a rhetorical question maybe you’ve heard of it? 012227
Kip Conlon @kipconlon.bsky.social · 06/10/2026Everyone smiles when I tell them I was attacked by a Labradoodle. 55616
Kip Conlon @kipconlon.bsky.social · 06/10/2026My barber isn't one for chitchat or even sideburns. 1122
Kip Conlon @kipconlon.bsky.social · 06/10/2026Some personal news: I'm in line for a promotion at work and have been cheating on Janine. 191
Reposted by Kip ConlonNate's Scary Myth @natesmith.dev · 30/09/2026Eyes of the (Biblically Accurate) Tiger 1308
Reposted by Kip ConlonBill Melots @wanksy.bsky.social · 06/10/2026Always confusing Tysons with Dysons but I’ll be damned if this isn’t a tasty vacuum. 0147
Kip Conlon @kipconlon.bsky.social · 06/10/2026We all laughed at the silly antics of the rodeo clown, until we abruptly didn't. 2112
Kip Conlon @kipconlon.bsky.social · 05/10/2026Keeping a journal of things I’ve lost interest in. Or I was. 310431
Reposted by Kip ConlonSalty MacTavish @saltymactavish.bsky.social · 02/10/2026Just heard a large tree fall in the woods next to an old cranberry bog. No saw, no other sounds. Feels like I hit the lottery. 814336
Kip Conlon @kipconlon.bsky.social · 05/10/2026Finally saw “Titanic.” I'll admit I cried when I found out how long it was. 48315
Kip Conlon @kipconlon.bsky.social · 04/10/2026I see it not as a failure but an opportunity to feel sorry for myself. 14522
Kip Conlon @kipconlon.bsky.social · 03/10/2026For those trick-or-treaters who may have food allergies, it’s Snickers or nothing. 373
Kip Conlon @kipconlon.bsky.social · 03/10/2026Watching all the “Saw” movies in a row has given me a deliciously wicked idea. 4121
Reposted by Kip ConlonGretchen Felker-Martin PRE ORDER CHIMERA 2.16.27 🍉 @scumbelievable.bsky.social · 03/10/2026so often the stupid personal essay de jure is a flagrant case of "that's an inside thought, mama. that's for your journal" 121126123
Reposted by Kip ConlonDropped Mike @rebrafsim.bsky.social · 17/01/2025daughter: look daddy, I made you this picture! me: aw honey, what the fuck am I supposed to do with this 1243186
Reposted by Kip Conlonceej @ceej.online · 03/10/2024Zombie fiction is, at its core, about the fear of seeing your own body age and decay. Ghost stories are about the impossibility of grappling with the past. Vampires are about what if you got so horny you died 11495302816
Kip Conlon @kipconlon.bsky.social · 03/10/2026If we're talking Australian opera houses, don't sleep on Sydney. 0135
Kip Conlon @kipconlon.bsky.social · 02/10/2026Since I couldn't beat 'em, thought I might as well join 'em. They wouldn't go for that, either. 2238
Reposted by Kip Conlonillumi @yallchemist.bsky.social · 02/10/2026I’m no ophthalmologist but it feels like 182 is a lot of blinking 310213
