Sign in

Eleanor’s Trousers

@eleanorstrousers.bsky.social
1.2K followers 998 following 2.9K posts

My skeets represent your employer. Atlanta raised, in Pittsburgh PA since 2000 - my accent is weird wherever I am. Go Dawgs. Putting the Q in LGBTQ+. TERFs be gone. (she/her)🏳️‍🌈

PostsRepliesMedia
Eleanor’s Trousers @eleanorstrousers.bsky.social · 6h
Bodies are so dumb. I finished all of my annual reports after hours and hours of overtime so now my body decided to finally lean into my cold and start sniffling and sneezing and whatnot. Time to create a new emergency with more adrenaline - I’m pretty sure that’s the Wellness move.
070
Eleanor’s Trousers @eleanorstrousers.bsky.social · 9h
Four YEARS after they went on strike, the journalists at the Post-Gazette have finally won the final case. Thinking of so many who had to walk away from their careers to make money to eat while the evil Block family sat on the money they’ve been due all this time.
094
Reposted by Eleanor’s Trousers
✧𝔰𝔭𝔬𝔬𝔨𝔶 𝔪𝔲𝔡 𝔰𝔠𝔞𝔪𝔭✧ @altaudge.bsky.social · 10h
What to do if your friend is sad
1) DRESS THEM
IN A COOL
JACKET
2) REMOVE THEM FROM THE PERSON OR LOCATION THAT IS MAKING THEM SAD
3) LOWER
THEM
SLOWLY
INTO THE PIT
"farewell"
16709119
Reposted by Eleanor’s Trousers
𝙱𝚊𝚋𝚎 𝚁𝚞𝚝𝚑𝚕𝚎𝚜𝚜 @unfitz.bsky.social · 12h
Got thrown out of the PTA meeting for ending the pledge of allegiance “with biberty and justice for all.”
410838
Eleanor’s Trousers @eleanorstrousers.bsky.social · 04/10/2026
Gave her the annual test run this morning since we’re about to have some nights in the low 40s. Our boiler, Bertha, described in our home inspection as “of unknown age, maybe 50s or 60s?” lives on. Hail Lady Fire Dragon.
2200
Reposted by Eleanor’s Trousers
Braden Serkas @portmanteauface.bsky.social · 03/10/2026
Sometimes women ask me how I got so smooth and the truth is centuries of sediment-rich spring water rushed around me in a deep alpine gulch but usually I just lower my sunglasses and wink
26027
Reposted by Eleanor’s Trousers
Siege @tellumsiege.bsky.social · 30/09/2026
I’d love to visit Japan just not during Godzilla season
817766
Eleanor’s Trousers @eleanorstrousers.bsky.social · 03/10/2026
Working overtime for a report due Monday. I have already changed all the air fresheners to fall scents, unpacked some boxes and broken down the cardboard and made a grocery list. The drugs in the 50s must have been better - I don’t know how housewives did anything without a looming work deadline.
050
Reposted by Eleanor’s Trousers
BeijingPalmer @beijingpalmer.bsky.social · 02/10/2026
this would be an incredible film if you started it with all the normal serial killer hunting tropes
782812513
Eleanor’s Trousers @eleanorstrousers.bsky.social · 02/10/2026
The current regime’s obsession with renaming things is inane, but I’m enjoying the recent executive order. When my boss says AI in a meeting, I stop him to remind him he is now required to only say Super Intelligence instead. I change it in memos. I giggle. It’s been a fun 2 days for me so far.
3121
Eleanor’s Trousers @eleanorstrousers.bsky.social · 01/10/2026
I will always repost this information. Not a single item of clothing pops out on a conveyer belt. Fabric doesn’t work that way. Human hands stitch them on sewing machines. I love bargains, but if you pay $2 for a tshirt that is because that human made very little money, likely in poor conditions.
1307
Eleanor’s Trousers @eleanorstrousers.bsky.social · 01/10/2026
Happy Fiscal New Year to those celebrating today! As usual, I have worked a 14 hour day because everyone will want their annual reports on the 1st even if a little window of time for data cleanup would be smarter.
060
Reposted by Eleanor’s Trousers
D. A. Powell @dapowell.bsky.social · 30/09/2026
A tv show called this old ho where they fix up an old ho
0171
Eleanor’s Trousers @eleanorstrousers.bsky.social · 30/09/2026
Scream singing with Muna live is good for what ails me (late-stage capitalism).
150
Eleanor’s Trousers @eleanorstrousers.bsky.social · 30/09/2026
You may ask yourself, why would a person own so many black tank tops? But do not ask the woman who owns them - she is busy looking for the correct one. No, not that one.
181
Eleanor’s Trousers @eleanorstrousers.bsky.social · 28/09/2026
One of these days, I’m going to take all of my carefully unworn white clothes and wear them all for a week so I can go ahead and stain them and put them all in the trash where they will end up. (This post brought to you by the cream hoodie I drizzled pancake syrup on after one hour of wear)
2170
Reposted by Eleanor’s Trousers
spleenly @spleenly.bsky.social · 28/09/2026
Deleting is the blocking of the self
14917
Reposted by Eleanor’s Trousers
Hell Frasier: Bloodline @babadooknukem.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
I'm standing in a room with 500 broke bitches and none of them have ever heard of this song
2945
Eleanor’s Trousers @eleanorstrousers.bsky.social · 26/09/2026
We finally started Ryan Murphy’s Lizzie Borden. I know it’s not historically accurate (because I wrote multiple Lizzie research papers in college - thanks women’s studies program!). But it is VERY gay and for that I can easily ignore all the rest.
040
Reposted by Eleanor’s Trousers
Kelly @justkelly.bsky.social · 25/09/2026
LMAOOOOOOOOOO. Sheeran’s tour dates at Robert Kraft’s Gillette Stadium all got rained out 😂 www.cbsnews.com/boston/news/...
cbsnews.com
Ed Sheeran's Gillette Stadium concerts canceled due to nor'easter, tour promoter says
Ed Sheeran's​ Gillette Stadium concerts in Foxboro, Massachusetts, have been canceled as Boston braces for a nor'easter.
1644762
Reposted by Eleanor’s Trousers
Tom Scocca @tomscocca.bsky.social · 25/09/2026
Do not carry a cold beverage in their presence. Politely decline any drinks or sweetmeats they may offer. Keep a plain iron nail in your left trouser pocket and a sachet or paper twist of coarse salt in your right shoe. Enter and leave your chair moving clockwise. Follow up with a thank-you note.
543306752
Eleanor’s Trousers @eleanorstrousers.bsky.social · 24/09/2026
The brush hairdryer thing that I use for my bangs shot sparks at me, and there was only a tiny wee itty bitty moment where I paused to consider still finishing my bangs before putting it in the trash.
070
Eleanor’s Trousers @eleanorstrousers.bsky.social · 23/09/2026
Upcoming work trip where it will still be hot, which means I need to find the perfect super-lightweight cardigan to cover up my arm tattoos in meetings all week (because I work in the 1850s and cannot scandalize the normies with some tasteful pine tree tattoos and whatnot).
150
Eleanor’s Trousers @eleanorstrousers.bsky.social · 22/09/2026
Work is training an AI voice to interview people for jobs. Somebody suggested in the group chat that I should review the questions since I’m the national expert on these qualifications. But my reputation precedes me. “We didn’t even ask her because she would find a way to break the AI on purpose.”
5200
Reposted by Eleanor’s Trousers
Holly Anderson 🍇 @hollyanderson.bsky.social · 21/09/2026
canny strike by trains, the natural enemy of planes
148653
Eleanor’s Trousers @eleanorstrousers.bsky.social · 22/09/2026
This morning, the cats were all still upstairs (instead of on top of Lex on the couch as usual). I was so confused that I came all the way down to make sure Lex was alive.
071
Reposted by Eleanor’s Trousers
Hadas Weiss @hadas.bsky.social · 21/09/2026
the museum sounds great i hope they also build one for women
311392248
Reposted by Eleanor’s Trousers
Matilda Flapweezer @mattieflap.bsky.social · 21/09/2026
September 21st again.
static.klipy.com
Earth Wind & Fire - Do You Remember September?
ALT: Earth Wind & Fire - Do You Remember September?
061
Eleanor’s Trousers @eleanorstrousers.bsky.social · 21/09/2026
I did not clean my house today, but I did make some new coasters which is probably just as useful.
A cardboard box with three drying coasters inside. They are wood edges painted blue, with various aqua shell type bits scattered on the inside, embedded in white grout.
1160
Reposted by Eleanor’s Trousers
phil @philjamesson.com · 20/09/2026
when i start ruminating on the boxed cereals which destroyed my memory, nothing can help me sleep. not even getting in full military regalia
image of a woman in bed wearing military regalia with several bars and medals pinned to her lapel
502326267
Eleanor’s Trousers @eleanorstrousers.bsky.social · 20/09/2026
Perhaps you will never be hand-gluing wee pearls to anything, but if you ever are, just get the round ones with no holes. The half-pearls seem smart, but then you have to get each one going flat-side-down and that’s tedious.
062
Reposted by Eleanor’s Trousers
Blue sky nice ghost @rajandelman.bsky.social · 19/09/2026
Me, bravely: I don't like how they put the woman in the bottle
Ozempic ad where the mac/pc guys stand, free to leave at any time, while a brunette is trapped in a giant rx bottle. What was her crime
1315711
Eleanor’s Trousers @eleanorstrousers.bsky.social · 19/09/2026
Dreamed that the Pope was my biological father through a complicated 1970s love connection. I’ll have you know that I volunteered to take that to my grave in exchange for some Papal-blessed knickknacks. I’m no Dan Brown villain.
160
Reposted by Eleanor’s Trousers
themboy insomniac @riotliturgist.bsky.social · 18/09/2026
just saw someone say "i don't think it's about gender. it's about control." and boy do i have shocking news for you about gender
3979204
Eleanor’s Trousers @eleanorstrousers.bsky.social · 17/09/2026
I don’t care if it’s the color of the year. I am not having a celery-colored 2027. I cannot. This is not my color.
880
Reposted by Eleanor’s Trousers
Patrick Cosmos @veryimportant.lawyer · 17/09/2026
I put Roko’s Basilisk in a burlap sack and I threw the sack in the river. The computer is fine now. it’s normal again
625429
Eleanor’s Trousers @eleanorstrousers.bsky.social · 17/09/2026
HBO finally added Outrageous, a six episode show about the bananas Mitford sisters that I’ve been stalking online, so I know where I’ll be this weekend.
050
Reposted by Eleanor’s Trousers
Microplastics Sommelier @leastactionhero.bsky.social · 16/09/2026
Sam Darnold

OUT INDEFINITELY
BROKEN ASS
1269185
Eleanor’s Trousers @eleanorstrousers.bsky.social · 16/09/2026
How is this the SECOND time someone mailed cocaine to the gas company in Pittsburgh? This is the worst terror campaign. Sending them your performance-enhancing drugs for no given reason. Cocaine in envelope spurs HAZMAT response at Peoples Natural Gas building, Channel 11 sources say
wpxi.com
Cocaine in envelope spurs HAZMAT response at Peoples Natural Gas building, Channel 11 sources say
11 Investigates sources tell us the employee who opened the envelope immediately got sick.
110
Reposted by Eleanor’s Trousers
Blue sky nice ghost @rajandelman.bsky.social · 16/09/2026
Saw a sign that said, "Pregnant? You're not alone." And I'm like, yeah. I think that's the premise lol
124624
Eleanor’s Trousers @eleanorstrousers.bsky.social · 16/09/2026
I love looking up after a busy workday and finding out Ed Sheeran imploded. The easiest thing in the world to me is putting an artist on Do Not Play This Artist and just never thinking of them ever again. There’s more music than I can ever listen to in my life - I’m fine about it.
090
Eleanor’s Trousers @eleanorstrousers.bsky.social · 16/09/2026
Down the rabbit hole on work reports for the next two weeks, which means @luxastarte.bsky.social comes into the office holding dinner and I realize that I was technically off work an hour ago. At least I get overtime.
160
Reposted by Eleanor’s Trousers
dissected @trepanation.bsky.social · 15/09/2026
billionaire having a heart attack after becoming overly excited about a speak & spell
319414
Eleanor’s Trousers @eleanorstrousers.bsky.social · 15/09/2026
I liked Mariska Hargitay as the Emmy host. Not too edgy or mean or someone trying to score a late night hosting gig. It gave the whole show its honest vibe, which is “you are watching our end-of-the-school-year awards banquet. For TV.”
090
Eleanor’s Trousers @eleanorstrousers.bsky.social · 15/09/2026
Nope. Not past weeping at every Dolly memorial. I mean, keep them coming. But I will cry.
190
Eleanor’s Trousers @eleanorstrousers.bsky.social · 15/09/2026
When I hear an unexpected noise in my house at night, I never expect a human. My night fear that some kind of creature has come inside - a raccoon or some other medium sized outdoor thing. It hasn’t happened yet, but I am prepared to scream properly if it ever does. (It’s always our cats or rain).
050
Eleanor’s Trousers @eleanorstrousers.bsky.social · 15/09/2026
Finally hit the point where my boss made me choose precisely when I’m using my use-or-lose vacation time. I usually hoard it for a super long Christmas break since my birthday is also that week and I have done enough suffering by the end of the year.
050
Eleanor’s Trousers @eleanorstrousers.bsky.social · 13/09/2026
The detailed recipe for anointing oil that Moses receives from God in Exodus 30 calls for 6 1/2 pounds of cinnamon AND 6 1/2 pounds of cinnamon sticks, so there is an argument to be made that pumpkin spice season is pleasing to the Lord.
1145
Eleanor’s Trousers @eleanorstrousers.bsky.social · 13/09/2026
Propagating plants seems like magic at first. Ooh! I had one plant and now I have four plants! Except one day you wake up and you have 97 plants. A new plant shop opened around the corner and I’m tempted to just smuggle some plants in there - leaving free product for local businesses!
040
Reposted by Eleanor’s Trousers
WRMS Traffic & Weather Reporter on the 2’s @carnegro.blacksky.app · 13/09/2026
I missed FAMU honoring Dolly Parton at Miami Friday night.
241920578