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bill chumps

@billchumps.bsky.social
234 followers 1.1K following 278 posts

heading for the stereo store to get a white noise maker and turn it up to ten

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Reposted by bill chumps
goof_off_artiste746393@yahoomail.com @goofoffartiste.bsky.social · 7h
The main project of the US now is a line-item vindication of the most histrionic and paranoid stuff ever said by Jello Biafra
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Moot Dengrich ☠️🎢 @catfishsushi.bsky.social · 07/10/2026
How the fuck are people still talking about Harry fucking Potter
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gwen howerton @kissphoria.bsky.social · 06/10/2026
must be the big star about to fall
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Tyler, from the Internet (Haunted) @tylerfromtheinternet.com · 04/10/2026
past me present me 🤝 fuck future me
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Patrick Cosmos @veryimportant.lawyer · 01/09/2026
i don't think i should be required to work hard and do a good job when everyone with power over my life barely works and does a bad job
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Ian Coldwater 🧊🚫 @lookitup.baby · 30/09/2026
BREAKING NEWS: “Do geese see God” is a palindrome
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Spokane Rising @spokanerising.com · 29/09/2026
Send Stephen Miller to The Hague.
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Better Things Are Possible @internethippo.bsky.social · 15/11/2025
Should the economy be regulated by a democratic society to ensure that it creates opportunity and benefit for everyone? Or should it be a plaything for approximately a dozen of the world's most odious assholes? Who knows
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Garth Marenghi's Catbus @catbus.phd · 23/09/2026
nathan fielder: you're a real PNG file, right?

Elizabeth Holmes on a gray checked background looking totally full of shit:
why would I decieve you?
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David_j_roth @davidjroth.bsky.social · 24/09/2026
The sunny side of this delusion is the computer gives you a flying car and makes it so you don't have to work. The blackpill one is that it wipes us out via some cinematic method TBD. Two futures you don't actually have to live in. Both are abdications, and embarrassingly childish on their face.
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Acting the Fulemin @actingthefulemin.bsky.social · 22/09/2026
there are 70 million people for whom this is the biggest song in the world. they watch comedies called like "Wives of Jim" that have run for nine seasons. they're usually pretty affable in person. in 2024 they severed the fate of humanity because of egg prices
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Luke O'Neil @lukeoneil47.bsky.social · 13/09/2026
"I am for the dignity and safety and equal rights of trans people everywhere. Fuck you. The end." "I do not believe you care about this issue. You are lying. In fact you're a straight up weirdo for fixating on kids' genitals so much. That is odd behavior. Let kids run around with their friends."
welcometohellworld.com
I do not believe you care about this
You are lying
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Patrick Monahan @pattymo.com · 12/09/2026
STOP2END Season is in full swing
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Salty MacTavish @saltymactavish.bsky.social · 10/09/2026
Don't blame me I voted for the whales who sang new songs during covid because we shut the hell up for a few months
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bill chumps @billchumps.bsky.social · 08/09/2026
man the new @realinfowars.bsky.social is fuckin nailing it
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damniel spookradski @self.agency · 08/09/2026
personally, i've done way too many psychedelic drugs to believe that thought can be conceptually reduced to "data processing and analysis."
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gamera obscura october edition @ohrobin.bsky.social · 04/09/2026
She’s had it with dating. She’s been burned by love. But this fall, one woman is finally ready for the relationship she’s always dreamed of: a marriage of convenience to a citizen of another country, offering a clear legal path out of the United States.
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[giver of problems: ultra pro✨] @jforjae.bsky.social · 02/09/2026
Me to my crockpot cuz it’s September
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bill chumps @billchumps.bsky.social · 02/09/2026
if you have a gas stove, there’s nothing to stop you from heating up leftover Thai in a pot and a pan and luxuriating over it with your wife by candlelight during a power outage. Pretty cool
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Sky Marchini @sky.skymarchini.net · 01/09/2026
this pisses me off so much. imagine being a literal child in another country and having the US secretary of defense make fun of you for some fucking reason
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bill chumps @billchumps.bsky.social · 27/08/2026
getting dunked on by the website you used to print out directions from
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Jerry Chen @jcsalterego.bsky.social · 25/08/2026
words used to mean something
a screenshot reads: Jalapeño delivers more throughput per kilowatt
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lauren @lauren.rotatingsandwiches.com · 18/08/2026
i don't know who thought it was a good idea for the high-profile pedophiles in charge of our government to develop a makework program for lesser known pedophiles within our federal policing apparatus. but i disagree with them
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bill chumps @billchumps.bsky.social · 20/08/2026
This whole thing smacks of gender
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merr-itt came from outer space @merrittk.com · 19/08/2026
if we ever meet intelligent aliens our first question should be "so what kind of dumplings you guys got"
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Innsmouth Looksmaxxing @gonebabygone.bsky.social · 18/08/2026
"I could train" is killing me
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SCREAMING MADi west @fauxedo.bsky.social · 18/08/2026
This is the kind of feminism that brings me back to Swan Boy time and time again.
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A.R. Moxon @juliusgoat.bsky.social · 14/08/2026
It seems to me that when you create a world where human life has been made as cheap as possible, you will eventually find you live in a world where your human life is deemed by others to be cheap, too.
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8 Matts in a Duffel Bag @scratchbomb.bsky.social · 11/08/2026
every generation gets the “now watch this drive” it deserves
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bill chumps @billchumps.bsky.social · 12/08/2026
Kristen Stewart AND LaKeith fuck yeah
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bill chumps @billchumps.bsky.social · 11/08/2026
Paul Kingsnorth's The Wake is written in an invented a variant of Old English, and that's a huge part of what made it such a good read
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actioncookbook @actioncookbook.com · 05/08/2026
"imagine AI was suddenly banned" okay I would have no loss in productivity but I would say "fuck off" to my computer several fewer times a day than I do currently
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Sarah J. Jackson @sjjphd.bsky.social · 31/07/2026
My three year old godson has spent the last hour secretly hand feeding me the green beans he doesn’t want to eat and I would really appreciate it if you would all agree to fix the world for him
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David_j_roth @davidjroth.bsky.social · 30/07/2026
Great blog. I would absolutely taste of the forbidden fish sludge. defector.com/abandoned-fi...
defector.com
Let Me And A Food Scientist Sample The Abandoned Fish Sauce Terrorizing A Small Canadian Town | Defector
Take capelin, a small silvery fish in the smelt family. Now add salt. Then throw those two ingredients in 110 vats, each of them about 10 feet tall, and let them sit in a defunct factory for over two ...
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Dr Neil & Mr Price @drneil.bsky.social · 30/07/2026
It’s really starting to grind me down
The Barney/Moe’s Tavern meme

“Default AI features” Barney being kicked out
“Finding how to turn it all off in the settings” -satisfied Moe

Third panel Barney coming in behind “software update”
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Luke O'Neil @lukeoneil47.bsky.social · 28/07/2026
The sword dangling over my head had lowered a touch over night. Still not close enough that I was freaking out but I could sense its movement.
The sword situation
The sword dangling over my head had lowered a touch over night. Still not close enough that I was freaking out but I could sense its movement. I called my brother to check if there were any developments with respect to his sword and he said he could sort of make it out way up there if he squinted. I don’t know why everyone’s losing it over these swords he said. Then I called my congresswoman to ask yet again if there were any plans to tackle the sword situation as it were and the girl who answered said it was the official position of the office that the swords do not exist except in some rare foreign cases. I could tell she was reading from a script. Can you let her know that they most certainly do I said and she said that she would pass the message along and hung up. Outside some landscapers were at work trimming the neighbor’s hedges. Each of them with a gleaming blade perched inches from the back of their necks. Why didn’t they just grab it at this stage I thought. Why didn’t they just reach right up and grab it.
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bill chumps @billchumps.bsky.social · 22/07/2026
www.404media.co/we-are-livin...
404media.co
We Are Living in a ‘ChatGPT Flyer Pandemic’
"Hey if this is your flyer, I’m not going, I’m not donating, I’m not sharing. Don’t ask me."
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Paul F. Tompkins @pftompkins.bsky.social · 21/07/2026
My room temp and correct take on tipping is that if you make a comfortable living you tip servers always and you tip them well because who the fuck do you think you are
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Andrew Lawrence @ndrew.bsky.social · 21/07/2026
hey does anyone know where i can read a profile of some dumb asshole that fell for a reality show hosts bull shit and it took a decade for them to realize theyd been duped? oh every day in every major publication? awesome thanks
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Dan O’Sullivan @osullyville.bsky.social · 12/07/2026
If you are demanding people not even criticize the clubby sort of whitewashing of a warmongering petty monster devoted to installing a dictatorship in America, you are holding regular people to a moral standard Lindsey Graham never cleared a single day of his life.
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Don Bones @donbones.bsky.social · 10/07/2026
I'm glad they made the entire internet suck shit and then decided you need to show ID to see it.
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Karl Bode @karlbode.com · 09/07/2026
surely Lucy will not yank the football away THIS time
nytimes.com
Big Tech Is Now Targeting Native American Land for Massive Data Centers
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bill chumps @billchumps.bsky.social · 08/07/2026
accurate
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bill chumps @billchumps.bsky.social · 07/07/2026
no better feeling than when you’re walking out the store with stuff in your hands, and the guy walking into the store holds the door open for you and when you say “thank you sir” he says “you got it buddy”
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molly conger @socialistdogmom.bsky.social · 06/07/2026
tfw you’ve just finished pissing on jefferson davis’ grave
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David_j_roth @davidjroth.bsky.social · 02/07/2026
I wrote about the sad Trump Country Fair thing and the very specific and hilariously shitty vision of America that it expresses. The war on metaphor continues apace. defector.com/dead-country...
defector.com
Dead Country Fair | Defector
Things come out of Donald Trump’s mouth, then just keep on coming out of it. If he says something once, he will say it again, primarily to reinforce how powerfully and unprecedentedly successful he wa...
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