Sign in

Alder King

@alderking.bsky.social
40 followers 65 following 87 posts

COAL MINE FOR PRIVATE USE ONLY - she/her

PostsRepliesMedia
Reposted by Alder King
Erica Henderson @ericafails.bsky.social · 09/10/2026
Ok this is the favorite commission for day 2. The prompt was "ghost rider as a mail carrier"
Ghost rider driving one of the new electric mail trucks
734270922
Reposted by Alder King
Sam Cole @samleecole.bsky.social · 08/10/2026
when will the pope make a statement about leaf blowers
419424
Reposted by Alder King
Lindsay Ellis @lindsayellis.bsky.social · 04/10/2026
Cruise line video was removed by YouTube over truly the dumbest copyright strike. Obviously fighting it, it’ll be back up in a few weeks like nothing happened. This is not an ad for Nebula, but it is still available on Nebula: nebula.tv/videos/linds...
511671187
Reposted by Alder King
Gwen C. Katz @gwenckatz.bsky.social · 25/09/2026
Fuck ChatGPT flyers. The future is broadsheets.
A crowded broadsheet with way too many fonts. It says:
Forget ChatGPT Flyers
Say it with 
Broadsheets
Unlimited fonts
Stretch them
Or cram a really long sentence into one line for no good reason
No whitespace
Mix capital and lowercase
Pointing hands
(They're called manicules!)
Don't be left behind
Broadsheets are the future
203190895452
Reposted by Alder King
a team of bumblebees @saramchenry.bsky.social · 14/09/2026
bury me in khakis and a lanyard so hell knows an expert is coming
101609225
Reposted by Alder King
Salacious B. Cummin @marshalplugnut.bsky.social · 13/09/2026
I see yer ma's got a new warning sign
Sign on a funfair ride that states 'this is a boisterous ride'
0604109
Reposted by Alder King
lauren @lauren.rotatingsandwiches.com · 13/09/2026
(standing on stage in front of booing crowd) I will not. No, I stand by my original statement. I would eat any of the 150 original pokemon. Yes, including Mewtwo. You know what, actually? Especially Mewtwo. If you can't be reasonable, I'll say it- especially the genius level ones, especially Mewtwo
501072108
Reposted by Alder King
Mar Hicks @histoftech.bsky.social · 11/09/2026
when you work at the BPAF but you’re beginning to realize there’s not going to be a successful IPO
241789535
Reposted by Alder King
Covie @covie93.bsky.social · 10/09/2026
john fetterman is the first rat in history to climb onto a sinking ship.
475239024325
Reposted by Alder King
merr-itt came from outer space @merrittk.com · 08/09/2026
going back in time to shoot the guy who thought we needed to see the stitches on mario's overalls in melee
632717
Reposted by Alder King
Edmond Tran @edmondtran.bsky.social · 08/09/2026
Screenshot from the videogame The Legend of Zelda: The Wind Waker. Close up of Link's big head looking up to the sky. A button prompt reads: 'Let Go'
41810361
Reposted by Alder King
da share z0ne @dasharez0ne.bsky.social · 31/08/2026
TIMES RUNNING OUT - dashare.zone ADMIN
A SKLEATON IN HELL "HEY AI COMPANIES, ENJOY YOUR SLOP WHILE YOU CAN, YOU"RE GONNA BE REPLACE BY HUMANS ANY DAY NOW, WE WONT GIVE YOUR UNCLE DELUISONS OF GRANDEUR, HUMANS USE LESS WATER, IF ITS YELLOW LET IT MELLOW, DONT HALLUCINATE MUCH AT WORK, BETTER AT TRICKING BOOMERS, WE ONLY NEED TOKENS WHEN WERE AT CHUCKY CHEESE, WE NEVER USED EM DASH ANYWAY - ITS INEVITABLE - JUST ACCEPT IT " - DASHARE.ZONE ADMIN
0476138
Reposted by Alder King
A Bloody Woodstake @tenderbeefsteak.bsky.social · 31/08/2026
My SIL is teaching remotely at a school in southern Illinois and I was not ready to learn about the mascot
A mascot painted on the wall of a high school. It says  “cornjerkers” and the mascot is an awful ear of corn with brown hair holding a football and kicking, I want to say, a soccer ball.
18263781186
Reposted by Alder King
Eric Malcolm @ericmalcolm.bsky.social · 26/08/2026
Others have said it previously, but I love how this promotional image from the 1990 Stephen King's IT looks like a prestige drama courtroom show, that just so also happens to involve a clown.
The cast of Tommy Lee Wallace's IT miniseries (1990)
7150461265
Reposted by Alder King
kate bush’s husband @airbagged.bsky.social · 26/08/2026
3 minutes of Tim Curry holding back laughter while filming scenes for Red Alert 3
83115573900
Reposted by Alder King
merr-itt came from outer space @merrittk.com · 26/08/2026
seeing this as a kid permanently altered my brain chemistry youtu.be/hr4knvNNgtU?...
youtu.be
Hexxus (Tim Curry) - Toxic Love (FernGully)
YouTube video by SlickStretch
734967
Reposted by Alder King
derek guy @dieworkwear.bsky.social · 25/08/2026
In his Second Discourse, Rousseau talks about how man was born free and able to live off the bountiful food that surrounded him in nature and then he was plucked from this state and introduced to society, where he was forced to labor. IG riverreachconstruction
383239640
Reposted by Alder King
drewtoothpaste @drewtoothpaste.bsky.social · 26/08/2026
shopping malls may be a thing of the distant past, but at least we still have pepperoni centers
"pepperoni center" a kiosk with a wide selection of pepperonis
021621
Reposted by Alder King
The saddest girl to ever hold a martini @lifeisterrible.bsky.social · 01/04/2024
DOLLY PARTON PET PEEVES
1. NOBODY NOTICES
I'VE GOT
GREAT ASS
TOO
3190402452
Reposted by Alder King
maple cocaine @maplecocaine.bsky.social · 23/08/2026
There are already plenty of stupid morons in academia but what the racists are demanding is that being a stupid moron should itself be a recognized academic discipline
101324211
Reposted by Alder King
James B. Jones @jamesbjones.com · 21/08/2026
When people say they’re anti-AI, they’re clearly talking about generative AI in the arts and LLM slop that C-Suite jackoffs want to use to replace them. You know this. I know this. Everyone knows this. So the “then don’t use spellcheck if you hate AI” talking point is disingenuous horseshit.
8153031897
Reposted by Alder King
Micah @rincewind.run · 19/08/2026
this is a really underrated factor in the Natalie Harp media explosion yes, Ossoff hit exactly the right target, but a big reason she was the right target is that everyone else around Trump finds her incredibly weird and offputting and is very excited to talk shit behind her back
413759509
Reposted by Alder King
Ken Jennings @kenjennings.bsky.social · 16/08/2026
I’ll be in this store for 5 more minutes, if anyone wants me to pick them up a Seventh Seal baby onesie.
a Seventh Seal baby onesie
41104551
Reposted by Alder King
donni saphire @donni.bsky.social · 17/08/2026
Sorry, I’ve just been in a weird mood since I was seven years old
1439136
Reposted by Alder King
andy™ @andylevy.net · 26/12/2025
writing a horror movie about a jewish exorcist whose catchphrase is “dybbuk stops here”
381418178
Reposted by Alder King
Down Here For Your Soul @bombsfall.bsky.social · 11/08/2026
This is my favorite movie quote
1024132
Reposted by Alder King
mike taddow @miketaddow.bsky.social · 09/08/2026
i can’t state this enough: wait for the end
2224644
Reposted by Alder King
Shelby Bennett @skelotan.bsky.social · 21/11/2024
bro's so dead they painted him into the background
3648231395
Reposted by Alder King
Down Here For Your Soul @bombsfall.bsky.social · 08/07/2026
don't go to this place
352298567
Reposted by Alder King
Peter @notalawyer.bsky.social · 26/07/2026
my wife keeps playing club bops from the late 2000s for the baby and when i ask what she’s doing she says “education”
45157557
Reposted by Alder King
Project Salt Box @projectsaltbox.com · 24/07/2026
ICE posted an RFI for over 1,000 "surge parking" spaces in 14 cities across the nation. While the posting doesn't state a specific time, it could indicate increased presence in those cities in the near future. sam.gov/workspace/co...
Screenshot of a list of cities and needed parking spaces.

Sacramento, CA - 40 spaces
Englewood, CO - 250 spaces
Dallas, TX - 85 spaces
Bakersfield, CA - 40 spaces
Roswell, NM - 20 spaces
Tukwila, WA - 100 spaces
Boston, MA - 249 spaces
Oxford, MS - 14 spaces
Las Vegas, NV - 25 spaces
Philadelphia, PA - 150 spaces
Pittsburgh, PA - 60 spaces
STL, MO - 30 spaces
New Orleans, LA - 20 spaces
Phoenix, AZ - 74 spaces
24268253
Reposted by Alder King
Matt Jordan @itsmattjordan.com · 17/07/2026
Mayor Mamdani is not its first victim
AOC looking extremely Italian
303232483
Reposted by Alder King
Helen Mask 🔜Oddities Expo Denver 🔜Geek Girl Con @hemask.bsky.social · 17/07/2026
I thinkkkkkkkk done
I murder of crows decorating their nest
351839546
Reposted by Alder King
Dan Olson @foldablehuman.bsky.social · 16/07/2026
It is impressive that AI might actually scale *worse* than Blockchain.
343267902
Reposted by Alder King
francis @dilfkink.kindboys.online · 15/07/2026
everyone who's called the latest MAHA testosterone grift "gender affirming care" needs to pay the nearest trans man $20
172037495
Reposted by Alder King
merr-itt came from outer space @merrittk.com · 20/03/2025
society erred when we removed the computer from its honored place in the home and ushered it into every part of our profane world. we must rebuild the temple of the Computer Room
47113162210
Reposted by Alder King
Jay Willis @jaywillis.net · 14/07/2026
An incredible euphemism here for “the government is doing illegal discrimination”
Opportunities Narrow for Women as Hegseth Blocks More Promotions
For the first time in more than a decade, no active-duty female Navy officers are likely to be promoted to admiral this year.
10082392155
Reposted by Alder King
🎃GHOULLIKEHELLMACHINE🎃 @golikehellmachine.com · 13/07/2026
so, the thing is, people are going to have to go to prison for all of this. not *just* because they deserve to, but because the cleanup for the next democratic party administration is going to be substantial and all-consuming, and they are going to need people to hang it on.
211540266
Reposted by Alder King
Claire Willett @clairewillett.bsky.social · 12/07/2026
I do just want to delicately point out that Agatha Christie has a book called THE PALE HORSE which is about a secret murder ring where people order a hit on someone they want dead by appearing to place a bet with an untraceable third party about whether or not the death happens by a certain date
01121202
Reposted by Alder King
Mistress Matisse @mistressmatisse.bsky.social · 12/07/2026
Okay now HERE is a Deep Niche theory
014820
Reposted by Alder King
Tyler, from the Internet (Haunted) @tylerfromtheinternet.com · 12/07/2026
microdosing republican death until we can get the full dose
81505234
Reposted by Alder King
Josh Gondelman @joshgondelman.bsky.social · 12/07/2026
“Lindsey Graham taught me that it was okay to be dead.” - Mitch McConnell
335669594
Reposted by Alder King
John Rogers @johnrogers.bsky.social · 12/07/2026
*pinches bridge of nose, eyes closed, takes a deep breath* so do we have ANY idea how many living US Senators there are right now?
10671491354
Reposted by Alder King
Joseph Fink, we're going to win @planetoffinks.bsky.social · 12/07/2026
Fuck that's a good own
020324
Reposted by Alder King
jon rosenberg @jonrosenberg.bsky.social · 09/07/2026
I talked to Mitch McConnell today for twenty minutes. He says he's a dracula now but he's the "good" kind of dracula that only drinks tomato soup. I asked him how that was different from his normal Thursday lunch and he grew furious and lunged at me with a ivory-handled dagger made of damascus steel
4932166
Reposted by Alder King
Patrick Wyman @patrickwyman.bsky.social · 10/07/2026
RETVRN but it's just shooting a firehose of federal funding for a new WPA
222151338
Reposted by Alder King
Michael Hobbes @michaelhobbes.bsky.social · 06/07/2026
Today marks 10 years since the launch of Pokemon Go, the last full week of optimism in America
341379180
Reposted by Alder King
bakoon @bakoon.bsky.social · 03/07/2026
low of 84 at night. somebody is going to killdoze a datacenter this summer
237957
Reposted by Alder King
5-4 Podcast @fivefourpod.bsky.social · 01/07/2026
a lot of podcasts will say that the Supreme Court sucks but we’re the only one that’s really about it
571442
Reposted by Alder King
Adam Serwer @adamserwer.bsky.social · 30/06/2026
people got mad at me yesterday when i said the dems were not ready to take court reform seriously. 5-4 for non-racial citizenship is not a win, it's a reprieve bsky.app/profile/schu...
11164181312