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Will Andresen

@willinois.bsky.social
139 followers 237 following 63 posts

Ope just gonna scoot on by ya here

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Reposted by Will Andresen
Dr. Todd Arrington @btarrington.bsky.social · 07/10/2026
“The test of our progress is not whether we add more to the abundance of those who have much; it is whether we provide enough for those who have too little.” ~President Franklin D. Roosevelt, 1936. Image: Universal History Archive/Getty Images.
This black and white photo shows a clean-shaven man, President Franklin D. Roosevelt, sitting at a desk and wearing a suit. He holds a paper in his right hand and appears to be speaking into a microphone that sits on the desk.
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MantraBeeg @mantrabeeg.bsky.social · 07/10/2026
Dey see me rollin' from such great heights.
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Jon Baker @thejonbaker.bsky.social · 02/10/2026
RANKED. COMPETITIVE. POOPING.
Royal Highland Show sign that says “Toilets For Competition use only”
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Rodger Sherman @rodger.bsky.social · 02/10/2026
A goose saying "what adversity?"
the same goose chasing a man yelling "what adversity was Deshaun Watson dealing with?"
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Don Moynihan @donmoyn.bsky.social · 02/10/2026
seems bad
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Museum of Twitter @museum-of-twitter.bsky.social · 02/10/2026
@murrman5

[me telling my story how I survived a plane crash and lived ona deserted island for a year] it was crazy

[friend who once got a text from me where I accidentally called the grinch the grink] was the grink there?
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dr peppermint patty @jessespector.com · 29/09/2026
he’s 38 and i do believe this is the face any bluesky user would make before being put at quarterback on monday night football
oh god i’m old
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ProPublica @propublica.org · 27/09/2026
“Judges simply don’t believe the representations that are being made by United States attorneys, assistant United States attorneys and the like,” a former federal judge said. “I don’t think...in the history of jurisprudence in the United States, we’ve ever seen anything close to this.” (Pub. July)
propublica.org
Federal Judges Chastise Trump’s Justice Department for “Unlawful,” “Unethical” and “Unseemly” Conduct
ProPublica reviewed hundreds of cases in which judges criticized the actions of federal prosecutors. In many, judges expressed frustration that they can no longer take the government at its word.
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Acting the Fulemin @actingthefulemin.bsky.social · 22/09/2026
there are 70 million people for whom this is the biggest song in the world. they watch comedies called like "Wives of Jim" that have run for nine seasons. they're usually pretty affable in person. in 2024 they severed the fate of humanity because of egg prices
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Kevin Collins @kwcollins.bsky.social · 18/09/2026
Who will show more commitment to, and solidarity in support of, First Amendment values: members of the White House Correspondents Association, or opening acts for Ed Sheeran?
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Ash Gravestoneman 🎃 @ashstoneman.bsky.social · 16/09/2026
Time to burn my Ed Sheeran cd
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Blue sky nice ghost @rajandelman.bsky.social · 16/09/2026
"60 Minutes. More like 60 viewers!"
Statler and waldorf
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NY Times Pitchbot @nytpitchbot.bsky.social · 16/09/2026
My three-year-old was at the Ed Sheeran concert when she turned to me gravely and asked "Daddy, why isn't the nice white rapper performing?" And when I told her "Because an old guy who visits teen-aged prostitutes had him cancelled," she started crying.
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jamelle @jamellebouie.net · 15/09/2026
only send your strongest, buffest, most handsome men to watch mr hegseth
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A.R. Moxon @juliusgoat.bsky.social · 15/09/2026
Arrest him?
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Basketball Fan, of the Sixers and LeBron James lmao! @drewhamm5.bsky.social · 13/09/2026
Nothing to smile about in my life
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🎃 Seasonal Creep 👻 @windingdot.bsky.social · 13/09/2026
Instagram thank u
Spud Dick has been inducted into the DePauw Tigers Hall of Fame
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Rodger Sherman @rodger.bsky.social · 12/09/2026
Serious contender for “most open a wide receiver has ever been in any football game ever”
A Boston College receiver, alone in the middle of the football field
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Will Andresen @willinois.bsky.social · 11/09/2026
Me In Honey
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The Onion @theonion.com · 07/09/2026
Americans Take Day Off From Looking For Work theonion.com/americans-take-day-off…
Americans Take Day Off From Looking For Work
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Dawn @502eire.bsky.social · 06/09/2026
I’m actually going to root for Ohio State this year. that’s how mad I am
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Radley Balko @radleybalko.bsky.social · 03/09/2026
Trump’s best business insight is realizing there’s a huge market of people who want to let everyone around them know that they’re a giant asshole.
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Bill Connelly @espnbillc.bsky.social · 31/08/2026
Speaking from at least a LITTLE experience … we don’t talk enough about how weird southern (or central) Illinois is.
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leon @leyawn.bsky.social · 29/08/2026
post by leyawn

jester, roast this peasant child for saying i have no clothes on. more vulgar, jester. use the forbidden words
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Will Andresen @willinois.bsky.social · 29/08/2026
My band plays where JB hangs out.
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Aaron Rupar @atrupar.com · 27/08/2026
Quite a community note here. Reminder that your taxpayer dollars are paying for these Nazi social media accounts.
Readers added context to this video: The clip is from the film Darkest Hour, and the “tiger” in this clip refers to Adolf Hitler
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The Onion @theonion.com · 26/08/2026
Dolly Parton Troubled To Find God Illiterate theonion.com/dolly-parton-troubled-…
Dolly Parton Troubled To Find God Illiterate
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Awful Announcing @awfulannouncing.bsky.social · 27/08/2026
dlvr.it
Cameron Brink calls Enes Kanter Freedom ‘stupid piece of sh*t,’ condemns ‘clickbait’
On Monday night, Los Angeles Sparks forward Cameron Brink swatted five blocks in a loss to the Atlanta Dream. Her most impressive block of the night came before the game even started. Brink, the 2024 No. 2 overall pick, spoke exclusively with Jarrod Castillo of Mirror US about the disingenuous media cloud hovering over the…
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DougExeter @dougexeter.bsky.social · 25/08/2026
dolly parton died of big natural causes
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don't hug me I'm porksweats @porksweats.bsky.social · 24/08/2026
mfer said paino
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Ray Radlein @radlein.bsky.social · 24/08/2026
Two Years Ago Today: One of the great screencaps of all time
Kari Lake (IIRC) rambling on during the GOP convention, while a GIANT message board in front of her reads "-5:35 please get off stage"
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Patrick Claybon @patrickclaybon.bsky.social · 24/08/2026
In a perfect world all of these weird losers would be out of sports but they speak to the most powerful political constituency to ever exist (weird losers)
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Rodger Sherman @rodger.bsky.social · 23/08/2026
LMAOOOOOOOOOO somebody finally asked the transphobes if they know any WNBA players besides and NOPE
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Not the Guy @notnotnuanced.bsky.social · 21/08/2026
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Will Andresen @willinois.bsky.social · 18/08/2026
Much needed Cubs dub
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Benjamin Ahr Harrison @benjaminahr.mobi · 17/08/2026
You’ve never wiped if you haven’t wiped cold.
The types of glass-footed beverage refrigerators that line the walls of bodegas and gas station convenience shops. This one is in a Brooklyn bodega, and you can see a bit of the next shelf forming this aisle. There are three fridge doors visible and behind all three are rolls of paper products like paper towels and toilet paper. The lights in the fridges are on, causing one to wonder if their other functions are also active. Like, is it even possible to turn on the lights but not the refrigeration unit? These are the questions that have bedeviled the philosophers for time immemiriam.
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horse massacre @torqpenderloin.bsky.social · 15/08/2026
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The Onion @theonion.com · 15/08/2026
Announcers Watch Angels-Royals Game In Total Silence
Announcers Watch Angels-Royals Game In Total Silence
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Jacob Weindling @jakeweindling.bsky.social · 15/08/2026
I love how even in his AI psychosis dreams he's alone
AI Elon at a long table with lit candles and plates for lots of people and no people
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BUM CHILLUPS AKA SPENCER HALL AKA PRESIDENT FOOTBALL @edsbs.bsky.social · 14/08/2026
Bought in early on “Drake sucks”
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Museum of Twitter @museum-of-twitter.bsky.social · 12/08/2026
Tweet from Angel ✟ (@fruitymiku):

Pissing

(screenshot of tumblr post:)

paper-mario-wiki

the main thing that puts me off of playing chess is that there is 2000 years of gameplay that hundreds of people with higher IQs than me have spent thousands of hours studying the history of, so much so that when i put the pawn forward they say "ah i see youre going for the bulgarian somersault" and then i try to take their bishop with my knight and they go "aw, rookie mistake, youve played the frenchmans cumsock, and in approximately 37 moves i'll have won"
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The Onion @theonion.com · 12/08/2026
“It might seem like a lot of money, but it’s worth it to have to a bird chittering away two feet from that guy’s bedroom from dusk till dawn,” AIPAC CEO Elliot Brandt said
theonion.com
Spiteful AIPAC Spends $30 Million On Loud Bird Perched Outside Abdul El-Sayed’s Window
ANN ARBOR, MI—In an effort to irritate the recent winner of Michigan’s Democratic Senate primary at all hours of the night, a spiteful American Israel Public Affairs Committee (AIPAC) reportedly spent...
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Clue Heywood @clueheywood.bsky.social · 12/08/2026
SpongeBob HUSSEIN SquarePants
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Douche Bigelow @the-author78.bsky.social · 11/08/2026
the only way to stop a bad mosquito carrying malaria is with a good guy with a gun
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Count Trashula @trashmobminis.bsky.social · 07/08/2026
I didn’t paint and attach thousands of individual popcorns to model trees just so you could tell me that AI is “inevitable”
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actioncookbook @actioncookbook.com · 05/08/2026
"imagine AI was suddenly banned" okay I would have no loss in productivity but I would say "fuck off" to my computer several fewer times a day than I do currently
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Museum of Twitter @museum-of-twitter.bsky.social · 07/08/2026
Tweet from bingo katagiri (@xepheraux):

the rehearsal ep 1: haha wow he is pushing the boundary of the amount it is possible to manipulate a single person. reality tv lmao
the rehearsal ep 4: it is impossible to fully know another person. you are trapped within yourself. but every attempt to bridge that chasm is heroic
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Stephen Hopkins @phil-lol-ogist.bsky.social · 07/08/2026
Parents Parents 2026 BCE 2026 CE 🤝 "These kids and their damned tablets"
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Marisa Kabas @marisakabas.bsky.social · 04/08/2026
This is rape culture.
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