iiinova — where your digital self keeps evolving

Clue Heywood @clueheywood.bsky.social · 10m

@edsbs.bsky.social big win by Northern Arizona over Montana in Flagstaff tonight has me thinking how Mike Leach would rule on Lumberjack versus Grizzly

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Clue Heywood @clueheywood.bsky.social · 22h

“Daddy Longlegs” is a pretty gay name for a spider.

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Clue Heywood @clueheywood.bsky.social · 01/10/2026

watched "Buddy Ryan's Sim City" and every game he would just build one school then attack it with aliens

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Clue Heywood @clueheywood.bsky.social · 30/09/2026

Jack Smith: need to meet and coordinate our phony takedowns of Trump Fani Willis: ok. security says airplane hangar or an abandoned loading dock is best Smith: no, too public, our faces are all over the news, no one can see us together. How about courtside at an Atlanta Hawks game Willis: perfect

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Clue Heywood @clueheywood.bsky.social · 29/09/2026

Goddamn. Play Warren Zevon’s “Back in the High Life Again” at my dive bar funeral.

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Clue Heywood @clueheywood.bsky.social · 28/09/2026

Started using “Everybody Wants Some!!” as my 4:45 am work alarm because how can you hear David Lee Roth Van Halen and not be ready to party

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Clue Heywood @clueheywood.bsky.social · 28/09/2026

Christine Baranski-themed slot machines for gay casinos is this anything

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Clue Heywood @clueheywood.bsky.social · 27/09/2026

The Arizona Diamondbacks will be the death of me, which would be a considerable upset over booze (currently -1400 at most books)

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Clue Heywood @clueheywood.bsky.social · 19/09/2026

Hanging out with three other middle aged men debating which “Girls” character we each are, everyone wants to be a Marnie but deep down we all know we’re a Shoshanna at best

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Clue Heywood @clueheywood.bsky.social · 17/09/2026

Clue Heywood and his good friend hitting Phoenix dive bars Laughing back and forth at what the other'n has to say Reminiscing this and that and havin such a good time Oodelally oodelally golly what a day

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Clue Heywood @clueheywood.bsky.social · 16/09/2026

Saw someone comparing the current AI panic to Y2K. As a Y2K survivor (thank you) the worry then was that all your data would be forgotten. The worry now is that all your data will be remembered, and used to destroy you. Seems different, to me.

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Clue Heywood @clueheywood.bsky.social · 16/09/2026

A movie called 9-11 to 5 where three office workers kidnap their male chauvinist boss and inadvertently save his life

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Clue Heywood @clueheywood.bsky.social · 14/09/2026

The road to the NFC West title goes through Glendale, so remember: back into parking spaces with a wall or fence behind it so it’ll be harder to get at your catalytic converter.

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Clue Heywood @clueheywood.bsky.social · 13/09/2026

@williamfleitch.bsky.social @captainlou.bsky.social hey I don't want to overreact after one half, but maybe we won't be a historic embarrassment to the State of Arizona this season

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Clue Heywood @clueheywood.bsky.social · 07/09/2026

poor league management has me drafting my fantasy team from a sturgill simpson concert tomorrow, good thing he plays slow and takes a lot of breaks

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Clue Heywood @clueheywood.bsky.social · 07/09/2026

kidnapped a bunch of people at Burning Man but when I call their families to demand ransom I get a lot of hangups or people saying "naah we're good"

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Reposted by Clue Heywood

Dominic Armato @darmato.bsky.social · 06/09/2026

If you decide allow time to expire, turn to page 37 If you decide to put one second back on the clock and give Michigan one more chance, turn to page 89

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Clue Heywood @clueheywood.bsky.social · 06/09/2026

We finally have a statement about that highly controversial ending, sir Great. What layout and font should we use? Definitely “back cover of a 1980s young adult mystery paperback”

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Clue Heywood @clueheywood.bsky.social · 06/09/2026

Can’t believe we’re only beating Northern Arizona by 28 when their water coolers are full of Triple IPA and the oxygen pumps out 25% OG Bruce Banner

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Clue Heywood @clueheywood.bsky.social · 06/09/2026

Lots of national college football storylines in Week 1 but I’m watching the only truly meaningful game today (Arizona 21, Northern Arizona 0 in the third quarter)

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Clue Heywood @clueheywood.bsky.social · 06/09/2026

Even if you’re not a college football fan you have to love this feel-good story for an underdog, do-it-the-right-way program like Michigan.

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Clue Heywood @clueheywood.bsky.social · 05/09/2026

Been way too many months since I laid on my couch and whispered “need a stop here” to myself while watching two college football teams whose home states I don’t know

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Clue Heywood @clueheywood.bsky.social · 05/09/2026

if I could be transported to and also participate in a completely insignificant point in history, it would be when David Letterman and Warren Zevon became really good friends

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Clue Heywood @clueheywood.bsky.social · 05/09/2026

Got an uncle in Puerto Rico. Spends his days in the sun, and his nights in the casino, he left the states many years ago. Took a fishing boat to Puerto Rico. Now my aunt she’s sad and lonely, but she’ll never know that she drove him away. As a coward I admire his courageous ways.

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Clue Heywood @clueheywood.bsky.social · 03/09/2026

honestly can’t think of a more “Four Seasons Orlando” motherfucker than Ken Paxton

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Clue Heywood @clueheywood.bsky.social · 02/09/2026

Friend texts me at 9 am today. She went drinking last night at a dive in rural AZ hours away from Phoenix. Thinks she left her bag at the bar. Asks me if I know anyone to help. Who do you think I am, some statewide drunk? So anyway I text the owner and call the bartender and get it resolved by 9:30

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Clue Heywood @clueheywood.bsky.social · 02/09/2026

wonder if the United States Marine Band knows the Curb theme song

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Clue Heywood @clueheywood.bsky.social · 01/09/2026

an Angels fan sees the ownership news, smiles to himself, takes off his flat-brimmed hat, wipes the sweat off his hyperpigmented HGH forehead, and calls his grandson to celebrate

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Clue Heywood @clueheywood.bsky.social · 28/08/2026

Dolly Parton taught me it was OK to kidnap and torture Dabney Coleman, and for that I’m grateful

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Reposted by Clue Heywood

captain bleach @blainecapatch.bsky.social · 27/08/2026

killing time in self-defense

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Clue Heywood @clueheywood.bsky.social · 25/08/2026

Stand off? I was standing UP, against charging over $5 for Coors Lights. It’s bullshit and you know it, your honor.

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Clue Heywood @clueheywood.bsky.social · 25/08/2026

they used to call teachers colleges “normal schools” until someone was like nah buddy, nice try, but we’re on to you

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Clue Heywood @clueheywood.bsky.social · 21/08/2026

rapping Natalie Harp's letter to Trump over Eminem's "Stan"

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Clue Heywood @clueheywood.bsky.social · 21/08/2026

Due to work obligations I had to pass on an opportunity to have lunch with Mike Gundy tomorrow. I really need to rethink my priorities.

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Clue Heywood @clueheywood.bsky.social · 21/08/2026

Say what you will about the experiment that was LIV Golf, but at least most of the guys involved were really unlikable.

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Clue Heywood @clueheywood.bsky.social · 21/08/2026

This week in “Anxiety Brain,” the only show that makes you remember decades-old offhand comments, I’m re-living when my date made a racist improv suggestion at Second City like 24 years ago.

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Clue Heywood @clueheywood.bsky.social · 20/08/2026

having to explain "Big Freedia Kahlo" to everyone in my fantasy league, might just go back to my old name

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Clue Heywood @clueheywood.bsky.social · 20/08/2026

when your side piece says the word “girlfriend”

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Reposted by Clue Heywood

Dan of the Year @downwithdan.bsky.social · 19/08/2026

"this edible ain't shit" two hours later:

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Clue Heywood @clueheywood.bsky.social · 19/08/2026

This woman on Nextdoor inadvertently wrote an entire thriller/horror movie in just 56 words.

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Clue Heywood @clueheywood.bsky.social · 19/08/2026

Sad to report my debut outlaw country single “She’s Havin’ a Red Hot Time on my Green Thumb” has now been rejected by 20 different labels, and I might have to self-produce it

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Clue Heywood @clueheywood.bsky.social · 18/08/2026

can’t believe Trump said Hayden Panettiere was quote “really hot in Remember the Titans,” there is no bottom is there

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Clue Heywood @clueheywood.bsky.social · 16/08/2026

Currently at a bar being talked into setting up and promoting a speaking event and fundraiser for the Dem candidate for Arizona Mine Inspector, and if that ain’t the most Clue Heywood shit you ever heard then I don’t know what is

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Clue Heywood @clueheywood.bsky.social · 15/08/2026

actually listened to Pat McAfee’s “Pitbull & a Mugshot” and the first thought that popped into my head was “who do you think you are? jelly roll?”

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Clue Heywood @clueheywood.bsky.social · 15/08/2026

lots of people making fun of Pat McAfee for releasing an album but he did create an entirely new genre, songs for ICE agents to listen to in their unmarked vehicles

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Clue Heywood @clueheywood.bsky.social · 14/08/2026

RIP Queen Elizabeth II, she would have loved MLB’s Naked Gun Game

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Clue Heywood @clueheywood.bsky.social · 13/08/2026

Hank the Angry Drunken Dwarf’s wikipedia page takes quite a turn

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