Reposted by Sebastian Daviswargen @funeralpig.bsky.social · 07/10/2026got fired from the future crimes division after i accidentally dropped my ice cream cone into the precog's tank and killed one of them 11476194
Reposted by Sebastian Davisrax ‘levon honkers’ king @raxkingisdead.bsky.social · 07/10/2026gregor samsa awoke one morning to discover he had been transformed into a sickass beetle. fuck yeah he said scuttling all over the walls and ceiling like no dumbfuck traveling salesman could ever do. this is the best day of my life he said 373471793
Reposted by Sebastian DavisJP @jpbrammer.bsky.social · 02/09/2026every "storyteller" job on LinkedIn is like "We are evil and insane and wonderful. We are the next Uber and the next Apple and the next something that hasn't been named yet. We will kill you within weeks, possibly days, of employment. You will die thankful." 528426
Reposted by Sebastian Davispublic health guy @publichealthguy1.bsky.social · 31/08/2026my insurance no longer covers "psychiatry" but it does come with 15% off my first 3 months of disney+ 1244460
Reposted by Sebastian DavisKarl Bode @karlbode.com · 18/08/2026oh look, dems can easily leverage messaging to hijack, create, or redirect entire newscycles by exploiting the infotainment media's obsession with scaled ad engagement, who could have possibly imagined such a thingnbcnews.comWho is Natalie Harp? Sen. Jon Ossoff puts Trump aide in spotlightThe former TV news anchor began working for Trump in 2022 and has become a close aide during his second term. 15255671140
Reposted by Sebastian DavisSpike Friedman @spikefriedman.bsky.social · 28/07/2026Christopher Nolan giving Emily Wilson a call today: 640649
Reposted by Sebastian Davisamy brown 👻 @amybrown.xyz · 28/07/2026kids, i have something exciting to tell you. I just financed a cybertruck through x the everything app. also your mom left 114214600
Reposted by Sebastian DavisJon Bois @jonbois.bsky.social · 21/07/2026i like to come up with opinions that no one has ever believed or even heard of before and put "gentle reminder:" in front of them 201992252
Reposted by Sebastian DavisKevin M. Kruse @kevinmkruse.bsky.social · 13/07/2026(leaning over to my wife in the theater) "This is where they got the name for our Honda minivan" 2161845
Reposted by Sebastian DavisScott Aukerman @scottaukerman.bsky.social · 07/07/2026Enough turning these animated films into live action movies. I want to see live action classics turned into animation. Gordon Gekko’s cigar exploding, turning his face black. Lawrence of Arabia imagining a sand dune as a roasted ham. 411957344
Reposted by Sebastian DavisLeah McElrath @leahmcelrath.bsky.social · 27/06/2026“How much is a magical world worth?” A beautiful thread about Cabo Verde, the Peace Corps, and the World Cup: 2338661526
Reposted by Sebastian DavisJune Martin @theworldsgreatestwriter.com · 19/06/2026lmao poor yorick. they got his ass 1154241472
Reposted by Sebastian DavisRodger Sherman @rodger.bsky.social · 08/06/2026it is darkly funny that his son got married and he was like "ohhhhh uhhhh something popped up, you know, the war, I gotta do work on the war that night, unfortunately I just can't go" and then 2 weeks later, same war still going on, he's shutting down midtown Manhattan to watch the Knicks 35985761591
Reposted by Sebastian DavisPatrick Monahan @pattymo.com · 08/06/2026Spencer Pratt’s trailer has unfortunately rolled down a big hill into a giant novelty toilet 201554101
Reposted by Sebastian DavisMolly Knight @mollyknight.bsky.social · 08/06/2026If you’re in line to dunk on Spencer Pratt: STAY IN LINE. 1067847871
Reposted by Sebastian DavisStellbound: Stellraiser II @antlervel.vet · 05/05/2026Everything going okay man? You’re in a split diopter shot right now 241265196
Reposted by Sebastian DavisBoo!-per Lund @cooperlund.online · 04/06/2026We are all binging and bonging 1694
Reposted by Sebastian Davisnadira rodin @nadirarod.institute · 03/06/2026i finished the amontillado! hello! need more amontillado down here! 0579
Reposted by Sebastian DavisBrendel @brendelbored.bsky.social · 03/06/2026If the 60 Minutes thing is proving anything it’s that a lot of people in positions of power think there is no crime greater, no injustice more profound, than being called out for being incompetent when you’re clearly fucking incompetent 5964551122
Reposted by Sebastian DavisKen Jennings @kenjennings.bsky.social · 17/05/2026The result of AI boosters getting booed at commencement will NOT be them getting a wake-up call about AI skepticism. They will just stop speaking at commencements. But that’s a small win! 616259588
Reposted by Sebastian DavisHypervisible @hypervisible.blacksky.app · 17/05/2026“I don't understand what it's supposed to do. Every time I see a video on Instagram that's like, 'Hollywood is cooked,' what follows is, like, the most stupid dog shit I've ever seen in my life…”hollywoodreporter.comSeth Rogen Says If “Your Instinct Is to Use AI” to Write Scripts, “You Shouldn’t Be a Writer”'The Studio' creator said people who are thinking about using the technology to aid their writing skills should try another occupation: "Go do something else." 56107032225
Reposted by Sebastian DavisRob Wesley @eastwes.bsky.social · 14/05/2026Ferris Bueller prequel series that's mostly about him winning that basketball trophy. 051
Reposted by Sebastian DavisJonny IsGood @jonnyisgood.bsky.social · 10/05/2026I think it's time we celebrated the parents who are often left out during Mother's Day so id like to wish a Happy Mother's Day to all the dads out there. You matter too! 0313
Reposted by Sebastian Davis Ernest Luckman @ernieluckman.bsky.social · 15/04/2026ChatGPT: you’re right you’re so much smarter than him. He’s so schlubby and you’re so suave. Columbo will never catch you. 3694312369
Reposted by Sebastian DavisDenny Carter @dennycarter.bsky.social · 22/04/2026Until we have a national ban on gerrymandering there should be **zero** blue state Republicans in the House. None. 320522
Reposted by Sebastian DavisAlex Blechman @alexblechman.bsky.social · 18/04/2026It’s inaccurate to say Mario is brave and Luigi is cowardly Luigi is afraid of death, so he runs away from danger. Mario is afraid of living, so he runs towards death. Both brothers are cowards in their own way 96155203053
Reposted by Sebastian DavisBetter Things Are Possible @internethippo.bsky.social · 26/12/2024(living in a country where the most successful people are obscenely rich and shameless perverts and psychopaths) Time to teach my children to be honest and study hard in school 112122312051
Reposted by Sebastian DavisJason Concepcion @netw3rk.bsky.social · 13/04/2026I predict tomorrow Leavitt will say something like “The President was joking. He has an amazing sense of humor.” Followed by Trump being like “No, I am Christ.” 341962235
Reposted by Sebastian Davis"fart" @jonhendren.com · 30/03/2026the best day at school was when a dog would be loose on the playground. the second best day was when the janitor would get up on the roof and throw all the lost balls down and we would all run to catch them. i should have my real estate license very soon 43078
Reposted by Sebastian DavisRyan Nanni @celebrityhottub.bsky.social · 12/04/2026If you win the Masters back to back you should get green pants 712469331
Reposted by Sebastian DavisJon Bois @jonbois.bsky.social · 10/04/2026to me the pitt is a love letter to new york city – a town it lovingly accepts, warts and all. in a sense, new york is almost the show's main character 743446393
Reposted by Sebastian DavisAlex Brown 🇵🇸 (they/them) @bookjockeyalex.bsky.social · 10/04/2026I'm telling you, the solution to many problems in education is to hire school librarians (at a liveable wage, with administrative support, and adequate resources). Your students don't need an LLM, they need a librarian. 121254302
Reposted by Sebastian DavisJesse Hawken @jessehawken.bsky.social · 07/04/2026Senators posting about how you should call your senator about this… so demoralizing 1595
Reposted by Sebastian DavisKashana @kashana.blacksky.app · 07/04/2026Congress is so funny. The world could be blown to smithereens and half of them would be like not sure this is a kitchen table issue. 614397696
Reposted by Sebastian DavisCharlie Warzel @cwarzel.bsky.social · 07/04/2026something strange and horrible and somehow fitting that we should have a very real threat of madman civilizational destruction at the very moment when we also have humans on the dark side of the moon taking pictures that show how small, precious, and beautiful our world and existence is 332930689
Reposted by Sebastian DavisPhilip Eil @phileil.bsky.social · 07/04/2026Headline: The blood-dimmed tide is loosed, and everywhere The ceremony of innocence is drowned; Why It Matters: The falcon cannot hear the falconer; Things fall apart; the centre cannot hold; The Big Picture: Surely some revelation is at hand; Surely the Second Coming is at hand 414730
Reposted by Sebastian DavisPatrick Cosmos @veryimportant.lawyer · 07/04/2026they should make a constitution that has checks and balances so that one guy can't just rule over america like a king. i feel like the founding fathers should have clearly intended that so that we could interpret it that way. alas 015411
Reposted by Sebastian DavisGaijin "Jiangshi" Rando @gaijinrando.bsky.social · 02/04/2026Czech poster for GHOSTBUSTERS (1984) 1514735
Reposted by Sebastian DavisBetter Things Are Possible @internethippo.bsky.social · 05/10/2025A traveler from an antique land--great guy--said to me with tears in his eyes "Sir, two vast and trunkless legs of stone stand in the desert." And I said wow, that's really something. But we'll be building a big beautiful statue to my hubris and it will stand for eternity 203250529
Reposted by Sebastian DavisDougExeter @dougexeter.bsky.social · 25/03/2026yeah im bummed about sora. bummed i sora bunch of stupid fake videos 3790691450
Reposted by Sebastian DavisKen Tremendous @kentremendous.bsky.social · 25/03/2026It’s the future, it’s inevitable, just accept it, it’s the way we will all be working very soon and there is no point in trying to oh wait it sucks, no one asked for it or wants it, and it’s shutting down forever. 121370254
Reposted by Sebastian Davisleon @leyawn.bsky.social · 18/03/2026i bet it all on "will the strait of hormuz open by april" on polymarket. desperate, i launch a solo mission to open the strait. piloting a boat down the persian gulf, i immediately get blown up by a mine and die. "first person to get blown up by a mine in the strait of hormuz" pays out on march 31st 213476453
Reposted by Sebastian DavisKat Abughazaleh @katmabu.bsky.social · 17/03/202640 MINUTES TIL POLLS CLOSE. As always, if you’re waiting in line to vote, STAY IN LINE. 418112111417
