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Ehren Battermann

@ebattermann.bsky.social
1.8K followers 1.2K following 2.5K posts

SQL Server developer at Trinity Health HQ. On Bluesky mainly for tech, entertainment, & humor. Cat-obsessed. Hoopy frood who always knows where his towel is.

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Ehren Battermann @ebattermann.bsky.social · 11h
Did NOT realize this & weird tradwife from empty kitchen sotu address were the same person, it was already funny as hell, now it's DELICIOUS 😆🤣💀 thanks @cmjhawk86.bsky.social for pointing it out!
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derek guy @dieworkwear.bsky.social · 21/09/2026
Enjoyed this article about the growing number of men adopting cats, bucking gender stereotypes. Apparently Mamdani is allergic to cats, but has been getting allergy shots because his wife wants to adopt one. www.nytimes.com/2026/09/20/s...
nytimes.com
Dave Franco, Jordan Poole and Other Everyday Cat Dads Are Redefining Gender Stereotypes (Gift Article)
We’re living in the age of the “cat dad” and he’s being used to sell premium cat products and talk about healthy masculinity.
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lukelukeluke @lukelukeluke.bsky.social · 16/09/2026
Me: I’d like a slice of pizza Server: that comes with three sides Me: I know what shape it is
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Ehren Battermann @ebattermann.bsky.social · 16/09/2026
Can't like or repost this enough! Citizens United has kicked off a decline in the US like I thought I'd never see in my lifetime.
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cait (and adonis) @cait.bsky.social · 12/09/2026
enough of mother. bring back the other lady (grandma)
orange cat looking comically skeptical
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Ehren Battermann @ebattermann.bsky.social · 11/09/2026
I laughed way, way too hard at this 🤣
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irongremlin.bsky.social @irongremlin.bsky.social · 10/09/2026
Honestly if these are the sad fucks who end up cracking true human-like intelligence in machines I will immediately dedicate my life to mercy killing that poor sad sack before it realizes the hell it was born into.
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jessa 𑣲⋆ @softbutdangerous.bsky.social · 08/09/2026
Having black cats means you will inevitably talk to a pile of dark clothes on the floor.
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cait (and adonis) @cait.bsky.social · 08/09/2026
I'm sorry I know we've all discussed this trailer but "I'm always being real" is insane for a woman going to PRISON for FRAUD!!!!
youtu.be
You Can See Everything | Official Teaser HD | A24
YouTube video by A24
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Ehren Battermann @ebattermann.bsky.social · 07/09/2026
Last week, I was chatting w a couple I met at the bar that night, younger than me by a generation-ish, & it was felt about as natural as chatting with strangers at a bar has ever felt to me. Though I never even hinted (not intentionally, anyway!) at anything to do with the topic, at one point...1/x
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GONZO the Ca'at @gonzo.bsky.social · 01/09/2026
Pleez conseddir helping Salem and famolly. Thay are having a varry harde time in manny ways. Salem needs neurological help varry badly and thatis not cheep
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Pile Of Garbage @pileofgarbage.net · 01/09/2026
I love how Werner Herzog is ALWAYS like this:
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Ehren Battermann @ebattermann.bsky.social · 01/09/2026
lol can't get over this napping position
Fluffy void cat napping on his back next to a heating pad & some rumpled blankets/sheets on my bed, all four legs splayed in the air, hind legs & tail hanging off the end of the mattress
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Ehren Battermann @ebattermann.bsky.social · 31/08/2026
Born in '74, love to watch classic movies I never saw while growing up... Somehow missed the titan "9 to 5" (had fuzzy memories a bit mixed up with "Tootsie," which I'd seen), so I finally fixed that. Yes ma'am, I know. You were cute as a button, & I laughed my butt off at the movie; lots of fun!
static.klipy.com
Dolly Parton's Surprised Look
Alt: Dolly Parton's Surprised Look
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Fish Sauce Friend @meltedliquid.bsky.social · 31/08/2026
Last night a miracle happened and our cat Lola returned home after missing since May. I heard a soft meow outside, and there she was the same gorgeous baby as before if not a bit slimmer. It's a good Monday and I am so happy she's home.
A torty cat looking longingly at the viewer
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I'm Uni :3 @unicouniuni3.bsky.social · 27/08/2026
I really love these photos! They still make me laugh
A black-and-white cat in a cardboard boxA black-and-white cat in a cardboard boxA black-and-white cat in a cardboard boxA black-and-white cat in a cardboard box
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Alexandra Petri @petridishes.bsky.social · 27/08/2026
the year is 2027. gas costs $83 and lettuce is at war with us. however every location on every map now says AMERICA
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Mara Wilson @marawilson.bsky.social · 26/08/2026
We were singing “Make ‘Em Laugh,” and during one take, when he got to the line “My dad said, ‘Be an actor, my son’” he added, sotto voce, “Boy, was HE wrong.” I burst out laughing, and so did everyone else. That, and the times that we actually DID make Tim laugh, are my favorite memories of him.
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Hoodlum 🇺🇸 @nothoodlum.bsky.social · 25/08/2026
Tonight, the Empire State Building lights will sparkle pink at 9:25 to honor Dolly Parton. A global icon, her seven-decade career touched generations. She leaves a legacy through her Dollywood Foundation and Imagination Library, providing millions of books to children.
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Bethany Black @bethanyblack.bsky.social · 25/08/2026
Fuck. No. The greatest human being to ever live. Was thinking about Steel Magnolias when the director shouted at her in front of everyone and told her she couldn’t act and had no idea why they’d hired her she said “Because I’m Dolly Parton, and they hired you to make me look like I can act.”
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Jenny Lee Shee @jennyleeshee.bsky.social · 24/08/2026
I just saw a dog wearing a leash that said “Selectively Social” and now I need to find a necklace version of it for myself.
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Raluca Terry-Enescu @ralucahippie.bsky.social · 24/08/2026
I heard this explained as the potluck theory of free speech. Found the original post but not sure who the author is.
I was thinking of the "free exchange of ideas" last night. You know, it's not like a market, it's like a potluck. Everyone brings their own ideas and you sample others and some are familiar with a twist, some are interesting but not to your taste, some are bad, some are lifechanging. You can get into a discussion about recipes or technique, or what have you as people talk about the food.

If some brings mashed potatoes, you can debate the appropriateness for a potluck: is it too bland? Will it get cold on the table? Do potatoes make up too much of our diet?

But if someone puts a steaming platter of dog shit on the table, we're not going to debate it. And when we tell them to take it off the table, it's not because we are afraid of eating their dog shit or we think that it's going to revolutionize lunch but we don't want to allow that to happen.

We tell them to get it off the table because there is no debate to be had. It's dog shit. It's not an open question, it's not a matter of palettes or picky eaters.

That's why we don't engage with neo-nazis and white supremacists, and it's why we don't (or shouldn't) let them come to the potluck.
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GONZO the Ca'at @gonzo.bsky.social · 22/08/2026
Behaviores Report: 95% goode, 5% trespaced on tha hellocobber shelve AND LOWNGED
Orange and white cat lounging on a helicopter shelf. His behavior report is 95% good, 5% trespassed on the helicopter shelf.
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Pᴜʀᴇ Dᴇᴀᴅ Gᴀᴍɪɴɢ @puredeadgaming.bsky.social · 22/08/2026
OK this is incredibly cool. A gamer has created floppy disks of his Steam collection and they act as executables to launch that game.
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Hillbilly Highlander @hillhighlander.bsky.social · 21/08/2026
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David_j_roth @davidjroth.bsky.social · 21/08/2026
I think it's nice that the president's most trusted aide is the It's All For You Damien nurse from The Omen. She's qualified and she's doing an amazing job.
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Catbus @catbus.phd · 21/08/2026
techbros be like "I am happy to announce the IPO of my wish granting company, Monkey's Paw LLC"
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rei ☆ feral catboy extraordinaire @warsfeil.bsky.social · 19/08/2026
every so often I'll be moving around my gaming shit and I'll remember that time a man told me i was a casual gamer and i just
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Dan of the Year @downwithdan.bsky.social · 19/08/2026
"this edible ain't shit" two hours later:
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Ehren Battermann @ebattermann.bsky.social · 18/08/2026
Made my whole week to see & hear this! 😊
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Faine Greenwood @faineg.com · 15/08/2026
so many cases of horrible little weasels who decide to burn it all down due to getting rejected by Harvard
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Rae Radford @raeradford.bsky.social · 14/08/2026
So cute…. #BookSky
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Bethany Black @bethanyblack.bsky.social · 15/08/2026
This is a solid joke, and the extra layer, if the guitar was flipped she’s hitting the correct notes
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Ehren Battermann @ebattermann.bsky.social · 15/08/2026
I've never wanted any of my consoles to gently serenade me before now
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Dan McCoy @dankmccoy.bsky.social · 14/08/2026
Was watching Reacher and saw the episode's director was Sam Hill, and I said, "Who the Sam Hill directed this?!" out loud to the otherwise empty room, so I'm possibly the most "dad" person who doesn't have children.
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Strictly 4 My Navigators @lizzslockeroom.bsky.social · 14/08/2026
Happy 81st Birthday, Steve Martin 🎉🎈🎂 My favorite dentist! 😂
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Ehren Battermann @ebattermann.bsky.social · 14/08/2026
Had a db dev moment this morning where I wanted to unpivot some diagnosis data per member, recalled seeing a way to do it via a cross apply rather than the unpivot stmt... And realized that Dwain Camps article is over a decade old now. Where did the time go? It wasn't THAT much fun 🙃 #sqlfamily
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Sasha Talebi @sashat.bsky.social · 13/08/2026
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Ehren Battermann @ebattermann.bsky.social · 13/08/2026
perhaps the key to getting a video game ceo who can't shut the fuck up to put a sock on it, particularly one who's glazing ai like they're starting up a new religion, is to teach them to model the behavior via said amazing power of ai
Google search "shut the fuck up" with ai overview: "I will stop talking now."
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Ehren Battermann @ebattermann.bsky.social · 13/08/2026
Everything the light touches... Is her kingdom
Very floofy tortie staring off camera, light highlighting her face
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Gene Rayburn @generayburn.com · 07/08/2026
It's Friday. #Bjork is OUT OF HERE.
Bjork on a bike
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Ehren Battermann @ebattermann.bsky.social · 07/08/2026
Based
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Ehren Battermann @ebattermann.bsky.social · 05/08/2026
FINALLY getting some time to relax & enjoy this demo. I absolutely love the wordless storytelling & pixel aesthetic! I can hardly wait to play the full game after it releases later this month!
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Chuck Wendig @chuckwendig.bsky.social · 30/07/2026
Increasingly, Soylent Green serves as one of the best metaphors for AI -- it's taking all that we are, as people, chumming it up, and feeding the slurry back to us. We're told that we need it, it's nutritious, it'll save the world, even as it damns it and us.
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ashley (ravens 2-1) 🌹 @clearlyashley.bsky.social · 30/07/2026
trans rights frankly is a top 5, potentially top 3 issue for me despite not being trans and not having any trans family being bigoted against trans folks not only hurts my trans friends and every trans person but is so predictive of further bigotry
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beetle moses @beetlemoses.bsky.social · 25/07/2026
Three panel comic. Panel 1: a seal and a shark are laying in bed, getting hot and heavy. The seal romantically says, “Shark…” Panel 2: with its eyes still closed, the shark replies, “person on a boogie board…” The seal suddenly opens its eyes, looking pissed. Panel 3: the seal exclaims, “what!?” And the embarrassed looking shark says “uh…” The shark has a thought bubble and is imagining a swimsuit-clad balding man with sunblock and goggles holding a boogie board.
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Ehren Battermann @ebattermann.bsky.social · 24/07/2026
The alt text is the cherry on top of this perfect sundae... comic 😉
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Jeffrey Ⓥ @liftforever67.bsky.social · 22/07/2026
#TuesdayVibes 😼 #Caturday #CatsOfBluesky
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howdydo.bsky.social @howdydo.bsky.social · 21/07/2026
It’s not exciting, but you should look at the data before making a decision. ETA has the public data & explains how they analyzed it. electiontruthalliance.org/2024-us-inte...
electiontruthalliance.org
2024 U.S. Integrity Concerns - Election Truth Alliance
Explore key 2024 U.S. election integrity concerns, FAQs, and why ETA calls for hand counts of paper records in every election.
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