iiinova — where your digital self keeps evolving

Reposted by Potentate Hawtshot

Raysident Evil @sireviscerate.myatproto.social · 05/10/2026

Brain: You're going to be sad today. Me: Why? Brain: What do you mean? Me: I mean, what is the reason for being sad? Brain: I'm not sure I follow. Me: What is the cause of the sadness? Brain: Are you even speaking English right now?

1485

Potentate Hawtshot @greegreehoist.bsky.social · 04/10/2026

I've had lockjaw since 1992 so that's why I'm so skinny and am so good at Pearl Jam karaoke

030

Potentate Hawtshot @greegreehoist.bsky.social · 04/10/2026

This morning I saw a dog diarrheaing on the sidewalk and their owner standing there with a baggie ready on her hand looking like, how the hell am I supposed to pick that up? She didn't

210

Reposted by Potentate Hawtshot

Potentate Hawtshot @greegreehoist.bsky.social · 04/10/2026

There are people who always have bad things happen to them and it can be for one of two reasons: They make bad decisons or The universe has decided to dump on them for no good reason That last group needs an exorcism or reiki or something

022

Potentate Hawtshot @greegreehoist.bsky.social · 04/10/2026

022

Potentate Hawtshot @greegreehoist.bsky.social · 04/10/2026

I swear some of yall need a spiritual cleanse

161

Reposted by Potentate Hawtshot

born miserable @bornmiserable.bsky.social · 04/10/2026

it’s always “protect girls’ and women’s sports,” but never “protect girls and women”

16971209

Reposted by Potentate Hawtshot

Johnny Normality (Spooky Mode) @probgobl.in · 04/10/2026

Kicked out of the Girl Dinner party for referring to them as "bitch tapas".

0101

Potentate Hawtshot @greegreehoist.bsky.social · 04/10/2026

Scot free is nice but sometimes has more strings attached than even Scot lease so be careful

041

Reposted by Potentate Hawtshot

Jenny Doesn’t Know @jennydoesntknow.bsky.social · 02/10/2026

Thinking of going on some sort of spree. Have to pick between shopping or murder.

129937

Reposted by Potentate Hawtshot

Braden Serkas @portmanteauface.bsky.social · 02/10/2026

The candy shop door swung open and he strode in. Patrons gasped and clerks hid under the counter. He put a smoke out with the heel of his boot, pulled another from his leather jacket, and gripped it with his yellowed teeth. "Oh my god," a woman whispered, "it's the fifth dentist"

514847

Potentate Hawtshot @greegreehoist.bsky.social · 01/10/2026

I was thinking about getting a massage and facial for my birthday, but then I remembered I could spend the money on something that would last for longer than a day

240

Potentate Hawtshot @greegreehoist.bsky.social · 30/09/2026

I think I could get into the Art of WarCraft if we're talking knitted bombs, embroidered uniforms, and hand-painted intelligence reports

011

Potentate Hawtshot @greegreehoist.bsky.social · 30/09/2026

I've seen enough shows where the character experiencing the supernatural thinks they're going crazy to know I'd be a terrible therapist. Yes, I think maybe you ARE being hunted by vampires or are possessed by the spirit of a 12th century crime-fighting witch

051

Reposted by Potentate Hawtshot

Carole Boo @caroleu.bsky.social · 29/09/2026

Fam, I don’t often ask for help but the tableful of 70+ white guys are talking about how old Helen Mirren looks now and there’s still some coffee in my cup and I have a clear line of fucking fire.

5257

Potentate Hawtshot @greegreehoist.bsky.social · 29/09/2026

These days if I see a pic of an iceberg, glacier, or any other blue frosty thing, I'm scrolling right past. I don't need to feel despair when I'm just trying to eat my cereal

151

Reposted by Potentate Hawtshot

John Lyon @johnlyon.bsky.social · 29/09/2026

People who think marriage is a deep commitment that’s hard to get out of are obviously too young to remember the Columbia Record and Tape Club.

719065

Potentate Hawtshot @greegreehoist.bsky.social · 29/09/2026

Listen the whole reason I'm married is to keep myself from eating cereal for every meal but don't tell my husband

160

Reposted by Potentate Hawtshot

Eize Basa @eizebasa.baby · 28/09/2026

Never give up on your dreams. Not because giving up is hard, but because you’ll learn how easy it is, how few ramifications there will be, how little other people cared about your dream in the first place, how addictive quitting will be now that you know it’s always an option.

1255

Reposted by Potentate Hawtshot

dan mentos @danmentos.com · 27/09/2026

[shopping at costco] why do hot dogs come in packs of 192 but the buns come in packs of 146

2758264

Potentate Hawtshot @greegreehoist.bsky.social · 26/09/2026

Someone is selling a mug on ebay for $1000. I had to click. Why is it so expensive? Because: "Used to turn water in to tea in by the lord thy God" I love the delusional audacity

271

Reposted by Potentate Hawtshot

TeenagePhlebotomy @teenagephlebotomy.bsky.social · 25/09/2026

the master sleeper practicing his art

a large black cat who is too large for this scratching bowl thing sleeping sideways exposing his nipples and genitals

0438

Potentate Hawtshot @greegreehoist.bsky.social · 25/09/2026

Me, stalking an increasingly panicked cute fuzzy raccoon and at the park. Husband: No! We have cute fuzzy creatures at home

180

Reposted by Potentate Hawtshot

Johnny Normality (Spooky Mode) @probgobl.in · 25/09/2026

I AM CONVERTING A HERD OF WILD HORSES TO CHRISTIANITY TO FULFILL A LIFELONG DREAM FOR MANY OF US: A BRAND OF GELATIN THAT UNDERSTANDS THE CONCEPT OF SIN.

23711

Reposted by Potentate Hawtshot

Potentate Hawtshot @greegreehoist.bsky.social · 25/09/2026

I'm surprised Under the Skin isn't a more popular movie considering Scarlett Johansson is fully naked in it

011

Reposted by Potentate Hawtshot

Allan "Pealed Grapes" Mott @houseofglib.bsky.social · 25/09/2026

I was recently asked to be interviewed for a UK newspaper article about dating apps letting women set height restrictions for matches but they never followed up when I told them, "I don't find it offensive because filters work both ways and it helps me to avoid shallow jerks."

141

Potentate Hawtshot @greegreehoist.bsky.social · 25/09/2026

I got myself a slice of chocolate cake from the grocery store and oh my god why am I not doing this all the time?

073

Reposted by Potentate Hawtshot

StonedTweeting @lexshepard.bsky.social · 25/09/2026

Being an American is fucking embarrassing.

001

Potentate Hawtshot @greegreehoist.bsky.social · 25/09/2026

I'm surprised Under the Skin isn't a more popular movie considering Scarlett Johansson is fully naked in it

011

Potentate Hawtshot @greegreehoist.bsky.social · 23/09/2026

Goddammit. If I'm going to have a sub-$8 wine on a Wednesday, it should have the decency to be screw top

220

Potentate Hawtshot @greegreehoist.bsky.social · 23/09/2026

Gonna make overalls my brand. Like, I'll have em in every color.

230

Reposted by Potentate Hawtshot

Ryan North @ryannorth.ca · 23/09/2026

Pompeii is a UNESCO world heritage site not because it was remarkable in its prime, but because it survived to our era untouched: one moment, preserved for all time. But future generations won't know what OUR world was like unless we do the same. This is why we MUST bury Toronto with a volcano

Picture of the streets of Pompeii, from https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Pompei_-_panoramio_(26).jpg. Taken by Tanya Dedyukhina, used under CC

11868541647

Potentate Hawtshot @greegreehoist.bsky.social · 23/09/2026

Every time I do glute bridges I use Howard the Duck on my ceiling to focus on. Do you see him?

Photo on left is a spot my ceiling that looks like Howard the Duck. On the right is the actual character

010

Potentate Hawtshot @greegreehoist.bsky.social · 23/09/2026

Some people put out their pumpkins and orange-leaved towels. I scroll all the way to the bottom of @ryannorth.ca webpage .

130

Reposted by Potentate Hawtshot

Johnny Normality (Spooky Mode) @probgobl.in · 23/09/2026

WHY DID THEY STOP AT SAWS I WANT A CHAIN HAMMER.

3247

Reposted by Potentate Hawtshot

Travis comma bitch @prof-hinkley.bsky.social · 23/09/2026

My Halloween decorations all take AAAAAAAAAAAAAA batteries

16510

Reposted by Potentate Hawtshot

Raysident Evil @sireviscerate.myatproto.social · 23/09/2026

Sommelier: I recommend one of our sparkling whites Me (confused): like in twilight?

0212

Reposted by Potentate Hawtshot

Murderously Matt @momentarilymatt.bsky.social · 22/09/2026

My dark tendrils will seep into the city streets, pulsing like so many utility lines. You will realize too late that your pumpkin spiced latte is turning you into a pumpkin spiced thrall, ready to do my bidding.

023

Reposted by Potentate Hawtshot

Grant Tanaka @granttanaka.bsky.social · 22/09/2026

Boss: [asks me to do something] Me: [wonders how beyonce would do it] Boss: STOP WONDERING ABOUT HOW BEYONCE WOULD DO IT

525390

Potentate Hawtshot @greegreehoist.bsky.social · 22/09/2026

I watched Shin Masked Rider and the hero kinda looked like an old mutual from Twitter, and man, what if he was a secret Japanese movie star that whole time

231

Potentate Hawtshot @greegreehoist.bsky.social · 19/09/2026

I guess there are jobs that have assignments and projects and due dates, but not nearly as many as school trained me for and I resent that time so much more now

130

Potentate Hawtshot @greegreehoist.bsky.social · 18/09/2026

Let's play...Is it belly fat? Or is it fibroids?

111

Reposted by Potentate Hawtshot