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Steve Lastname

@abhorrentvacuum.bsky.social
167 followers 203 following 59 posts

Hardiness Zone 6B 4-ever. “I decided not to park here.” Crow’s Next! travel vlog - youtube.com/@crowsnexttravels?si=CJ…

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Bethany Black @bethanyblack.bsky.social · 23h
Clippy the Word for windows assistant says:

Hey, it looks like you're waiting for ideal conditions to do that thing you've been wanting to do. Need I remind you that ideal conditions do not exist and will never happen?
•I'm aware
•Wow, rude
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AW Sylwester @aw-sylwester.bsky.social · 07/10/2026
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los 🦦 @los-los.bsky.social · 25/10/2025
Spirit Halloween Hiring Manager: And where do you see yourself in five days
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Uncle Duke @uncleduke1969.bsky.social · 25/07/2026
It was Timothy’s second week undercover, and frankly, he was getting absolutely nowhere.
Two Huskies lay on a couch on either side of a cat wearing a Husky costume’s head.
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One Dog’s Opinion 🐾 @onedogsopinion.bsky.social · 19/07/2026
the remarkable Andrea Gibson
Spider
by Andrea Gibson


All of my pain is a spider I've learned not to crush with the heel of my shoe
but to guide with a page of my journal into an empty glass.
I ask questions about its life, its purpose as I walk careful
out to the garden and rest it down on the earth.
My pain-how happy it is to leave me whenever I treat it kind


Andrea Gibson, 2024 Poet Laureate Fellow. 
Gibson, who passed away on July 14, 2025, served as Poet Laureate of Colorado from 2023 until their passing.
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weeder @weeder.bsky.social · 21/06/2026
Oh my god. Honey, don't move.
Woman laying in bed watching a tablet on a four articulating leg stand that looks like a huge spider
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futuredadOfTwo🙋🏻‍♂️ @lacroixboi.dadguy.pro · 20/06/2026
werner herzog with a speech bubble over the quoted post
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Mark Hamill @markhamillofficial.bsky.social · 10/06/2026
Heart-Melting Post of the Day: ❤️ ❤️ ❤️ ❤️ ❤️ ❤️ ❤️ ❤️ ❤️ ❤️ ❤️ ❤️ ❤️ ❤️ ❤️ ❤️ ❤️ ❤️
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Philo of Alexan @philoof.bsky.social · 07/05/2026
If you are having a hard day just remember there are dogs
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Tom Toro @tbtoro.bsky.social · 06/05/2026
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George Conway ⚖️🇺🇸 @gtconway.bsky.social · 28/04/2026
His Majesty is saying we Americans should have no kings.
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Ellis Rosen @ellisjrosen.bsky.social · 15/04/2026
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Steve Lastname @abhorrentvacuum.bsky.social · 29/03/2026
“Garment musket” is brilliant. #marchmadness #forte
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FR🎃 V🎃 @frovo.bsky.social · 11/03/2026
who called it an american express credit card statement instead of an ae iou
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Steve Lastname @abhorrentvacuum.bsky.social · 27/02/2026
Why do they call it an “MRS Degree” when “Je t’aime B.A.” was right there? I will si myself out
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WeRateDogs @weratedogs.com · 18/02/2026
This local Wolfdog joined an Olympic ski event and triggered the finish-line camera. This is Nazgul. He snuck into a cross-country skiing sprint this morning and raced the homestretch with some competitors before being escorted home. 14/10 someone get him a medal
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Richard Kadrey @richardkadrey.bsky.social · 18/02/2026
2026 basically
A photo of an ice cream machine with a sign reading, "Anything is possible with ice cream." Beneath that is a hand lettered sign reading, "No ice cream".
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Jack @wakeupangry.bsky.social · 16/02/2026
As a kid I never imagined I’d be richer than my dad, older than Batman, and smarter than the President.
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Rackletang 🧌🦇🕷️ @rackletang.bsky.social · 09/02/2026
Well damn, that's well said
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J. Michael Mull @jmichaelmull.bsky.social · 11/01/2026
Hi Team, I'm going to circle back to our earlier conversation. Why exactly am I glad you didn’t say banana? Let’s touch base regarding the banana situation as soon as you have the bandwidth. I want to make sure I have all the context before we move forward with the next steps. Best regards, JMM
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McSweeney's @mcsweeneys.net · 31/12/2025
Our 2nd most-read piece of 2025 is by the forever funny @mikedrucker.bsky.social, and we have no idea what he was getting at here, but it seemed to have struck a nerve with many, many readers.
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Voting for the Mayor Who Promised to Blow Up the City Doesn’t Mean I Approve of the Mayor Blowing Up the City
It’s so easy to label people these days. From the way folks have been talking, you’d think everyone falls into two buckets: those who voted against...
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Michael Clemens @mclem.org · 17/12/2025
The US Administration has banned Americans from *adopting babies* from much of the African continent. Adopting. Babies. What trait do those babies have that, when they grow up as fully American adults, would make them a threat to our country in any form?
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RiotGrlErin @riotgrlerin.bsky.social · 13/12/2025
muppetized holiday scenes: thread
Rowlf as Cousin Eddie in National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation.
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Scott Seiss @scottseiss.bsky.social · 09/10/2025
“The economy is actually doing great”
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Marjorie James Keenan @unenthusiast.com · 27/11/2025
"I say we take off and nuke the site from orbit. It's the only way to be sure."
Norman Rockwell's Freedom of Speech but it's Ellen Ripley
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Discontinued FoOoOods! 👻🎃 @discontinuedfoods.bsky.social · 27/11/2025
The phrase "hit recording artist" is never bandied about with more frivolity than at the Macy's Parade
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Nnedi Okorafor, PhD @nnedi.bsky.social · 21/11/2025
Earlier today, I was notified that someone was at my door. This is who it was:
A male Anna’s hummingbird at the door. So nosy! 🤣
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Rick Steves @ricksteves.bsky.social · 10/10/2025
Thread: A year ago yesterday was a very happy day for me. I had lost my prostate. It was good riddance, as it was riddled with cancer. I’m now cancer-free — and thankful for the tax-funded technology that saved my life.
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Diedrich Bader @diedrichbader.bsky.social · 03/10/2025
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Mondo Mascots @mondomascots.bsky.social · 05/09/2025
Hatton, a sentient aerial view of a spilled bowl of soup, is the mascot for Tome City. The ingredients in the soup are local produce, and the spillage is in the shape of the city.
A white blob with big eyes and a beak is standing on a red carpet and wearing green boots and a red soup bowl hat.
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Kevin M. Kruse @kevinmkruse.bsky.social · 05/09/2025
"NUMBERS ALWAYS TEND TO BENEFIT THE LEFT"
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Frank Ray Whitehouse (He/Him) @wheeltod.bsky.social · 30/08/2025
If you can't handle me at what you have mistakenly assumed to be my worst, then prepare to be most unpleasantly surprised in the very near future.
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wade of mutilation @waderockett.bsky.social · 23/08/2025
In an inspirational meme format:

A soldier saw a girl taking a picture of her self holding a fancy Star-Bucks coffee. The Soldier grabbed her coffee and poured it down the sewer.
"What are you doing!" yelled the girl.
Then they heard a voice saying,
"Thank you for the coffee, Sir. I have been so thirsty and tired." The girl looked down and saw a SEWER MAN!
MORAL:There was a Sewer Man
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Casey S. Pumpkins 🎃 @caseyexplosion.bsky.social · 14/08/2025
Other people have better imposter syndrome than me I bet
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shauna @goldengateblond.bsky.social · 19/07/2025
i don’t even like baseball and suddenly i’m a huge Phillies fan
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america.is.not.free @antifapatriot.bsky.social · 08/07/2025
If you put googly eyes on the Pillars of Creation you get muppets 😄😄
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Ariaa® @ariaa.bsky.social · 04/07/2025
Nasa astronaut on ISS, caught this sprite over Mexico and the US this morning. Sprites are TLEs or Transient Luminous Events, that happen above the clouds and are triggered by intense electrical activity in the thunderstorms below. Source: NASA Astronaut Nichole Ayers
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Uncle Duke @uncleduke1969.bsky.social · 01/07/2025
“Who’s at the door?” “Bee.” “Fine, who be at the door?”
A bee hovers in front of a Ring camera
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RiffRaff @riffraff79.bsky.social · 22/06/2025
#Blutoid
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Kevin M. Kruse @kevinmkruse.bsky.social · 12/06/2025
The state of California needs to arrest the DHS "security" forces for assault and every Democrat in the U.S. Senate needs to sign onto a campaign to impeach Kristi Noem. Right fucking now.
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Mondo Mascots @mondomascots.bsky.social · 07/06/2025
Uesama, a hyperrealistic head on legs, promotes Sof’ ice cream.
A realistic stoic head with a samurai topknot stands in two legs in front of an ad for ice cream.
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Jooli-AHH! Boolia 👻🍂🎃 @jooliaghoulia.bsky.social · 03/06/2025
The perfect bird feeder doesn't exi--
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Captain Herman’s Space Camp For Lost Floofs @captainhermans.bsky.social · 06/05/2025
E.V.E.R.Y. T.I.M.E
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Chip Chantry @chipchantry.bsky.social · 29/04/2025
The recession is coming, folks: My wife bought us off-brand dyer sheets. No more pictures of seascapes or teddy bear mascots and rainbows on the box. It’s just a black & white drawing of a man alone in a room, sitting at a table with a Bible and a gun.
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Jen Bendery @jbendery.bsky.social · 26/04/2025
NEW: PublicSquare, a website that lets you search for businesses in your community that explicitly want you to know they endorse Trump/MAGA values, is backfiring as people use it to boycott those businesses. www.huffpost.com/entry/public...
huffpost.com
Website For MAGA-Friendly Businesses Backfires As People Use It For Boycotts
Social media posts about PublicSquare have gone viral as Trump critics use it to find companies not to support – the opposite of what the site was set up for.
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sshrinkingviolent.bsky.social @sshrinkingviolent.bsky.social · 06/04/2025
This is what democracy looks like! Frederick, MD #Handsoffdemocracy
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Steve Lastname @abhorrentvacuum.bsky.social · 21/03/2025
Winner decides pronunciation! #ncaa #ukansas #uarkansas
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Steve Lastname @abhorrentvacuum.bsky.social · 13/03/2025
Is this: (1) dinner time! or (2) Is it safe? #jococruise
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Steve Lastname @abhorrentvacuum.bsky.social · 13/03/2025
(1) Happy to say we survived flying American into DCA, but (2) lovely downtown DC just doesn’t look right, knowing what’s up in those buildings rn
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Sarah O’Connell @sarahoconnellshow.com · 25/11/2024
Netflix - please stop minimising the end credits of movies to suggest something else. Let viewers enjoy the soundtrack and see the cast and crew that worked on the film. We'll exit it ourselves when ready to. #film #filmsky #movies #moviesky
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