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Waikiki Wanda

@wanda.bsky.social
2.6K followers 1.3K following 9.2K posts

I was the first person on Bluesky to post “crube” 🪳

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Reposted by Waikiki Wanda
(°○°) @rarecryptid.bsky.social · 28/09/2026
No, this is a fridge, which, with the addition of a human skull and a set of scales laden with florins and guilders, might remind the idle snacker that amid the shady boughs of Nature's bounty gleams Temptation like a baleful lure to bring all Men to their ultimate and eternal Ruin.
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bog landlord @pondslurp.bsky.social · 20h
i had a blast but can you please not invite basho next time? his vivid depictions of the change of seasons make me painfully aware of my own transience
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Ppallo @ppallo.bsky.social · 4h
The names that the Wu-Tang Clan name generator is capable of spitting out are just as good as the "real" Wu-Tang Clan members names. If you can't accept that you will not survive in tomorrow's world. I will often spend hours on end generating names, this is how your kids will interact with Hip-hop.
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Waikiki Wanda @wanda.bsky.social · 4h
With the caveat that I am currently clinically brain dead I’m making myself laugh thinking about a guy driving a Tesla with a bumper sticker saying “I bought this before I knew I was stupid”
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Waikiki Wanda @wanda.bsky.social · 23h
I don't want to be dramatic but if I can't go home soon I am going to light m yself on fire
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Waikiki Wanda @wanda.bsky.social · 29/09/2026
Midway upon the journey of my life, I find myself in a forest dark and I need to lock in...I can't be paying attention to some Atlantic pervert who wants to get an allowance for putting a leash on his wife and leaving her in the backyard
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Waikiki Wanda @wanda.bsky.social · 29/07/2026
Another beautiful day in hog nation where the sun shines evermore on all my ugly enemies
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Waikiki Wanda @wanda.bsky.social · 29/09/2026
Hit my 48 hour work trip politeness cap. I timed out like a pilot. It's talking shit from here on out
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ams @parakeet.work · 29/09/2026
hey this thing loses $9 for every $1 you give it and i, the guy selling it to you, think it's like 1 in 10 it kills us all. can i have $2 trillion dollars?
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Azure Emerald Empire @azureemeraldempire.bsky.social · 29/09/2026
From Why Go On to Wah Gwaan: My Journey Out of Darkness into Irie
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Azure Emerald Empire @azureemeraldempire.bsky.social · 28/09/2026
Cleft twain on my way home! You can win
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Waikiki Wanda @wanda.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
I think they actually have to put Drake Maye down. They have to call a veterinarian
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The fact that @hyperref.net · 27/09/2026
Did you really just try to kill me with your cursed blade 😑
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Waikiki Wanda @wanda.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
What’s some other stuff about Texas. Texas is the first place I ever saw a “Smeg” brand appliance.
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Waikiki Wanda @wanda.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
Laughing thinking about writing a song called “Choosin’ Connecticut” and it’s instantly the most popular song in all billboard history
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Rob Wesley @eastwes.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
First time reaction video: First time hearing Happy Birthday
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Waikiki Wanda @wanda.bsky.social · 26/09/2026
Packing for my least favorite annual work trip and it took texting like seven people complaining about it to feel marginally better. Not a great ROI
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nathan @wiseposter.bsky.social · 25/09/2026
job interview move: place revolver with 1 bullet on table. if they try to avoid icebreaker games, calmly open your coat to show business gun
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Waikiki Wanda @wanda.bsky.social · 25/09/2026
Goated graphic. Instant hall of fame
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(°○°) @rarecryptid.bsky.social · 25/09/2026
A kid I was in first grade with told everyone that his cat was who Garfield was based on and I just felt nothing but for contempt for him. He is a father now and I wonder if his children know he is a liar.
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freecialis @freecialis.bsky.social · 24/09/2026
sharing my screen at the meeting and getting my friend to message me “great job. You are so good at working” right when I do. I pretend to be embarrassed and hide it
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Grobian Syboe @grobiansyboe.bsky.social · 09/04/2026
"One for The City, two for The Hive, three for The Jelly that keeps us alive, four for The Mayor, five for The Queen, Six for The Hand that remains unseen, Seven for The Cell, 8 for The Wall, and nine for The Gate that guards us all." -Bee Rhyme
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Oaf @languidoaf.bsky.social · 24/09/2026
I’ve reported your reply to the IRB
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hobart mariner @hobartmariner.bsky.social · 24/09/2026
reading a quantum book written by a philosopher. found ~16 errors in the 'mathematical formalism' chapter. of varying degrees of severity. but the chapters about stuff i know less well seem magically free of mistakes...
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Azure Emerald Empire @azureemeraldempire.bsky.social · 23/09/2026
(listening to a language learning tape) The force from the blast dislodged the bulk container from the security clamp. … The heat from the blast ignited the ruptured fuel tank.
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Andrew Wyeth @andrewwyeth.bsky.social · 28/07/2026
Distant Thunder www.wikiart.org/en/andrew-wyeth/dis…
Distant Thunder
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Nurbsy @nurbsy.bsky.social · 23/09/2026
Air travel posts are like someone telling you about the dream they had last night
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Sam @mardiroos.bsky.social · 24/09/2026
In the United States, going to the store wrong is considered very disrespectful.
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Waikiki Wanda @wanda.bsky.social · 23/09/2026
Does anywhere know where the big three year old PDF I located and opened about a month ago is. I need it again.
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JP @jpbrammer.bsky.social · 23/09/2026
it's important to arrive at sturdy ethical principles that you can't be annoyed out of. people are annoying as shit
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Waikiki Wanda @wanda.bsky.social · 23/09/2026
I try to hate this website less and then I encounter things like a histrionic 8000 post thread about a diverted plane...many people need to attend some sort of adult Outward Bound camp to develop mental resilience
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Waikiki Wanda @wanda.bsky.social · 22/09/2026
Skattebo is not ensouled
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Waikiki Wanda @wanda.bsky.social · 20/09/2026
Doing the Arrested Development “Good for her” gif at Geno getting a taunting penalty
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Azure Emerald Empire @azureemeraldempire.bsky.social · 10/05/2026
I crash my car into the bridge, I love it
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georgia-lux @georgialux.bsky.social · 09/03/2024
i pull my own pants AND the pants of the guy next to me all the way down at the urinal
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rob @ok-but-still.bsky.social · 18/09/2026
fox news declares driving is "gay" amid oil crisis
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Waikiki Wanda @wanda.bsky.social · 18/09/2026
Pope orb riffing feels labored. No one's heart is really in it
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Chris 𓅨 @bigjuncofan.bsky.social · 18/09/2026
One time I was out on a walk with my camera and a random guy stopped me to say "Bird watching? Try iNaturalist! You can get ID help and it supports opens science" It was like in a video game tutorial where they show you how to open up the map or something
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Waikiki Wanda @wanda.bsky.social · 18/09/2026
@beepthief.bsky.social Did you see the vid of Napheesa talking to the little girl
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Waikiki Wanda @wanda.bsky.social · 18/09/2026
Three score loss incoming
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Bread Crumb Bum @ultracrepa.bsky.social · 17/09/2026
Ghost of C.S. Lewis: “okay I understand and support deriving inspiration from pedophiles, but why wasnt that bisexual chemically castrated?”
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Chris 𓅨 @bigjuncofan.bsky.social · 17/09/2026
Placing bets on prediction markets as to whether a dog has buddhanature or not
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Waikiki Wanda @wanda.bsky.social · 17/09/2026
Never been suspended on here but I caught a few on Twitter and I think they really were just for telling people to kill themselves, nothing fancy. Olden times were rougher around the edges
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chore doer @humidbeing.bsky.social · 16/09/2026
out: forgive and forget in: tribunals and gulags
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(°○°) @rarecryptid.bsky.social · 16/09/2026
It must please Fred Rogers's wicked Presbyterian soul to see people argue over his approval for none so love blood in the street and chaos in the pew as the Reformed Heart.
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Waikiki Wanda @wanda.bsky.social · 16/09/2026
I have an opinion about a popular cultural product currently in the conversation that would get me yelled at but I have put away such childish things
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Tarlton @tarlton.bsky.social · 16/09/2026
“If It Ain’t Fleischmann’s, It Ain’t Glass Frog” ™️
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Waikiki Wanda @wanda.bsky.social · 16/09/2026
I would be learning a lot from the audiobook Quran right now if this cab driver would stop cussing over it because of construction on the Van Wyck
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USER WAS BLOCKED FOR THIS POST @blockedforthispost.bsky.social · 07/08/2026
i regard water as dry
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Waikiki Wanda @wanda.bsky.social · 16/09/2026
Ok I read that book that came out last year about the lady who wants to fuck planes while on a plane, and my official review is, while it had more sexual content than I usually like to tackle in public, ultimately I found it to be a rather touching consideration of female friendship.
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