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Simon Treanor

@simonjtreanor.bsky.social
304 followers 415 following 1.1K posts

I don't really have any characteristics

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Reposted by Simon Treanor
Ian King @twoht.bsky.social · 3h
For National Poetry Day, by @robertflorence.bsky.social.
Batman's Aff His Nut

Batman’s aff his nut
Have you seen the way he cuts aboot
Dressed up as a mad fuckin bat
Batterin guys
I was lit at:
“Mate, I’m worried aboot ye
I know your ma and da died
But everybody’s ma and da dies
And we’re no aw runnin aboot
Hookin muggers and
Kickin psychopaths in the baws.”
And that was when Batman went
“Aye, but do ye ever feel like it?
Do you ever look at the world and feel like it?
Like having a big mad base under your hoose?
Do you ever feel like drivin a big mad motor
that turns intae a tank?
And leatherin fuck oot of guys aw night?
Scarin the fuckin shite oot of them?”
And that’s when I was lit at:
“Aye. Fuck it. Ah dae.”
And that’s the Secret Origin of Robin
And everyone else.
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M a r c u s 🏳️‍🌈🇧🇧 @marcusjdl.bsky.social · 30/09/2026
We keep telling them that everyone in the UK has eaten British Indian food even the smallest towns and they’re like “haha they’re not British” and they were calling this latest viral take “comedy genius”
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Simon Treanor @simonjtreanor.bsky.social · 30/09/2026
I don’t think that’s a record you can work towards
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Omelette Coleman @omelettecoleman.bsky.social · 30/09/2026
So many claims relating to AI are solutions to problems that no healthy society would ever consider to be problems at all.
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Simon Treanor @simonjtreanor.bsky.social · 29/09/2026
As a fan of a team that lost league titles to City with 97 and 92 points, I don’t feel very much about all this. You can’t get that joy back, nor can you take it away. Maybe that’s what makes this so insidious- they won, and in any meaningful sense, they always will have
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Simon Treanor @simonjtreanor.bsky.social · 29/09/2026
The Premier League has decreed that the team talk Eddie Large gave at half time of a Man City match in 1989 should be stricken from the record
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Karl Bode @karlbode.com · 29/09/2026
Meta's "Muse" launched with a nasty zero day flaw that gave hackers the ability to spy on Mac users, openly gives root access to people pretending to be Muse agents, and invited strangers over to another guy's house without telling him
karlbode.com
Meta's Latest AI Product Is A Terrifying And Hilarious Mess
Authoritarian-friendly mass surveillance has never been more adorable
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Sam Whyte @samwhyte.bsky.social · 29/09/2026
alan partridge chocolate oranges mem

Still, good news about the 115th charge
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Si Lloyd @smnllyd5.bsky.social · 29/09/2026
Good thing City’s owners probably stopped all this in 2018, mind 👀
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Grace 🏳️‍⚧️ @gemofamara.com · 28/09/2026
been thinking recently that the font on every ai poster is going to replace comic sans' role of cultural embarrassment
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Coach Finstock @coachfinstock.bsky.social · 10/10/2023
About to get thrown out of here for obvious reasons
Pumpkin hoop
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Museum of Jerseys @museumofjerseys.bsky.social · 23/09/2026
New post: Today's date represents the squad-number move made by Robbie Fowler at Liverpool in 1996-97, part of a nice tidy-up operation museumofjerseys.com/2026/09/23/s...
museumofjerseys.com
Season in Numbers – Liverpool, 1996-97
In My Life in Football: Goals, Glory and the Lessons I’ve Learnt, Robbie Fowler makes some useful mentions regarding shirt numbers. Early on in his days at Liverpool, he clearly set out his s…
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Jim Trinca @jimtrinca.bsky.social · 23/09/2026
why am I being attacked like this
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Eamonn-Forde @eamonn-forde.bsky.social · 21/09/2026
Oh, Viz.
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Rob Delaney @robdelaney.bsky.social · 21/09/2026
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Tomas @m0byduck.bsky.social · 20/09/2026
You can tell Real Madrid are the richest club in the world if they can afford this amount of colour printer ink www.bbc.co.uk/sport/footba...
bbc.co.uk
Jose Mourinho prints out Atletico Madrid 'red card' incidents after Real Madrid lose derby
Real Madrid manager Jose Mourinho prints out screenshots displaying two incidents he believes should have resulted in Atletico Madrid dismissals.
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Simon Treanor @simonjtreanor.bsky.social · 20/09/2026
Just occurred to me that maybe Trump has misunderstood the idea that “the strongest shape is an arch”
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Simon Treanor @simonjtreanor.bsky.social · 19/09/2026
youtu.be/qCmRga2fIy0?...
youtu.be
Ivan Mládek - Jožin z bažin - Subtítulos en español, English subtitles, Napisy polskie,české titulky
YouTube video by Prague AI
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Simon Treanor @simonjtreanor.bsky.social · 19/09/2026
A football book, which I bought off eBay for about £6, has spent a week gping back and forth between Cricklewood (where I live) and Greenford (where I don't)
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Simon Treanor @simonjtreanor.bsky.social · 19/09/2026
It’s weird how you think if regulation was relaxed things would get gradually worse over several years, but RFK reduces regulation on American food and every company is just hiring diarrhoea sufferers to shit all over their products, just for the love of the game
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Rex Huppke @rexhuppke.bsky.social · 18/09/2026
At the end of the day, beyond the hatefulness, he's really just a spectacularly dumb guy. Like I'm not sure he's achieved object permanence yet. He has to be reminded which hole the food goes in. His internal monologue is the sound of one hand clapping. He calls electrical sockets "finger zappers."
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Denny Carter @dennycarter.bsky.social · 18/09/2026
i blogged about it badfaithtimes.com/if-trump-can...
badfaithtimes.com
If Trump Can’t Have The Kennedy Center, No One Can
The abuser in the Oval has given the Kennedy Center a choice: I own you or you get annihilated
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Simon Treanor @simonjtreanor.bsky.social · 18/09/2026
Terrible name for a product line. Reminds me of that tragedy
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Simon Treanor @simonjtreanor.bsky.social · 17/09/2026
Another example of the weird trend of AI slop photos of things that are extremely easy to photograph. There's so much wrong here - and this is supposed to be a guide?
AI slop youtube thumbnail with a picture of Hammersmith station. It shows a deep level tube station (Hammersmith isn't), with Bakerloo line colouring (wrong line), a green train (no tube trains are green), and various signage mistakes
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Simon Treanor @simonjtreanor.bsky.social · 17/09/2026
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John Bull @garius.bsky.social · 16/09/2026
hey me too!
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Simon Treanor @simonjtreanor.bsky.social · 15/09/2026
Of course they do this now Tim Curry's died
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The Author, Séamas O'Reilly @seamas.bsky.social · 15/09/2026
Occasionally, I'm reminded of my all time favourite piece of internet: this Reddit post from 12 years ago in which a guy claims he ruined dinner with his girlfriend's parents by refusing to admit he knew what a potato was.
TIFU by enraging the parents of my girlfriend by pretending not to know what a potato is.
Let me tell you that I have made a bad mistake this evening.

My girlfriend (who let me tell you is only my 2nd girlfriend of all time) said I am "invited to dinner" with her and her parents. I was very aghast, nervous, and bashful to be invited to such a situation. But I knew it must be done.

I met them nicely, I should tell you, and it started off in a good way. The idea slapped my mind that I should do a comic bit, to make a good impression and become known to them as a person who is amusing.

When I saw that baked potatoes were served I got the idea that it would be very good if I pretended I did not know what potatoes was. That would be funny.

Well let me tell you: backfired on my face. I'll tell you how.So first when the potato became on my plate, I acted very interesting. I showed an expression on my face so as to seem that I was confused, astounded but in a restrained way, curious, and interested. They did notice, and seemed confused, but did not remark. So I asked "This looks very interesting. What is this?"

They stared at me and the mother said "It's a baked potato." And I was saying "Oh, interesting, a baked....what is it again?"

And she was like "A potato."

And I was like "A 'potato', oh interesting. Never heard of a potato, looks pretty good."

And then they didn't see I was clowning, but thought I really did not know what is a potato. So I knew I would be very shamed, humiliated, depressed, and disgusted if I admitted to making a bad joke, so what I did was to act as if it was not a joke but I committed to the act of pretending I didn't know what a potato is.

They asked me, VERY incredulous, did I really not know what a potato is? That I never heard of a potato. I went with it and told them, yes, I did not ever even hear of a potato. Not only had I never eaten a potato I had never heard the word potato.This went on for a bit and my girlfriend was acting very confused and embarrassed by my "fucked up antics", and then the more insistent I was about not knowing what a potato is was when them parents starting thinking I DID know what a potato was.

Well let me tell you I had to commit 100% at this point. When I would not admit to knowing what a potato was, the father especially began to get annoyed. At one point he said something like "Enough is enough. You're fucking with us. Admit it." And I said "Sir, before today I never heard of a potato. I still don't know what a potato is, other than some kind of food. I don't know what to tell you."

Well let me tell you he got very annoyed. I decided to take a bite of the potato, and when I did I made a high pitched noise and said "Taste's very strange!"

That is when the father started yelling at me, and the mother kept saying "What are you doing?" and my girlfriend went to some other room.Finally the father said I should "Get the fuck out of his house" and I said it was irrational to treat me like this just because I never heard of a potato before. Well let me tell you he didn't take that kindly.

Now in text messages I have been telling my girlfriend I really don't know what a potato is. The only way I can ever get out of this is for them to buy that I don't know what a potato is.

I wish I never started it but I can't go back. I think she will break up with me anyway.
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Simon Treanor @simonjtreanor.bsky.social · 15/09/2026
this guy is cartoonishly racist and also a mainstream politician en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bo_French
en.wikipedia.org
Bo French - Wikipedia
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Lev Parikian @levparikian.bsky.social · 14/09/2026
Look, I know I’m supposed to be at least a Slightly Serious Musician, and some of his music is staggeringly good, but every time I conduct anything by Britten my cheap mind goes to this
The Viz comic’s “Benjamin Britten and his embittered bittern”. Sorry, it’s a 22-panel comic with a lot of text, so I’m afraid that’s all you’re getting. But I hope you get the idea.
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ℳatt @matttomic.bsky.social · 13/09/2026
I'm sorry, a free what of what?
Costco ad seen at the store: 1 free Bucket of Mayonnaise with your first online order
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Hassinator @hassinator.bsky.social · 13/09/2026
a great letter in the times today. perhaps worth sharing in these troubled times. #RNLI #heroes
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worm @rfksbrainworm.bsky.social · 13/09/2026
Busta Rhymes: Should I buy a house... or... a link to a picture of a pixelated monkey

NFTea expert: Houses are often more of a liability than [text truncated]
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Nick Pettigrew @nick-pettigrew.bsky.social · 12/09/2026
The snobbishness about this comes in part from the fact you can no longer pay all your bills doing a minimum wage job. If you work 35hrs a week you should be able to pay rent, pay utilities, buy food & have a little left over for a few beers on a Friday. This never used to be a controversial view.
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Simon Treanor @simonjtreanor.bsky.social · 12/09/2026
should have been @threebeansaladpod.bsky.social
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Jonathan Roberts @jonrob5000.bsky.social · 11/09/2026
Rhys Thomas hanging on by the skin of his teeth to not fully corpse. Quite a feat when faced by Felix Dexter in full flow
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Museum of Jerseys @museumofjerseys.bsky.social · 12/09/2026
Which is the best of the eight adidas trefoil away kits in the 2026-27 Premier League?
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Alan Elrod @aselrod.bsky.social · 11/09/2026
I wrote about Trump’s Wednesday night speech in Dallas. My main takeaway: this is a man who doesn’t want his followers or the country to outlive him. www.liberalcurrents.com/donald-trump...
liberalcurrents.com
Donald Trump Wants to Bury America With Him
His speech at the GOP's midterm convention came off like a Jim Jones sermon.
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flyingrodent @flyingrodent.bsky.social · 11/09/2026
An entire politics and worldview animated by a lively terror that somewhere, somebody might be eating a free cheese sandwich
Sharron Davies HoL MBE O
@sharrond62
x.com
Accept they're not free really are they? The cost the tax payer, when giving children a breakfast can be achieved for 50p at home. The cost to the tax payer is far far higher per breakfast than
50p
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Musa Okwonga @okwonga.bsky.social · 10/09/2026
The "stop the boats" movement is being driven by the type of English suburban racist who thinks that one black family living in their street is one too many. Yes, it really is as simple as that, and it has been for decades. There is no intellectual depth to this stuff. It is pure, distilled hate.
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Dave Itzkoff @ditzkoff.bsky.social · 10/09/2026
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Mike Drucker @mikedrucker.bsky.social · 09/09/2026
You’ve gotta use AI because it’s the future. But also it’ll take your job. But also it’ll create a paradise on earth and solve most of our problems. But also it’ll end humanity soon. But also you’ll get left behind if you don’t use it right now.
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Simon Treanor @simonjtreanor.bsky.social · 09/09/2026
This guy just constantly doing everything we've been told for decades was impossible and unpopular and making it extremely popular and possible. Makes you wonder what could've been possible, and less negatively, what could still be. And he does the folksy stuff that's all Burnham has managed so far
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Stan Oklobdzija @stano.bsky.social · 08/09/2026
"Doctors, lawyers and engineers" is an international online Nazi trope. The "joke" is that non-White people are too stupid to be anything other than a criminal or someone who leeches social services. Read a Spanish newspaper about Ceuta, e.g., and you'll see "médicos y ingenieros" in the comments.
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sasha baker @sasha98.bsky.social · 08/09/2026
I won't post the video, but this weekend, three leaders of an anti-migrant protest in Bicester held down and choked a Black guy until he was barely conscious, and only stopped after the cops told them to. None of them were arrested, and they were allowed to lead a march through the town afterwards.
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GT 🫪 @granitetide.bsky.social · 08/09/2026
might cancel my scottish green membership and start donating to the quakers cos they're seemingly the only organisation in this country able to take a consistent and forthright moral stance on this stuff
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Mic Wright @brokenbottleboy.bsky.social · 08/09/2026
A detail missing from The Times story… the woman who took the photo shared it to a Facebook group called ‘South east patriots’.
Facebook post showing the photo of three white women on a train with a group of black-clad, masked men being shared to a group called ‘South east patriots’
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Simon Treanor @simonjtreanor.bsky.social · 08/09/2026
Remember when they criticised Bennett (I think? Might have been another Green MP) for travelling on holiday by train
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Daniel Sugarman @danielsugarman.bsky.social · 08/09/2026
This Neo-Nazi is attempting to target RNLI volunteers. The police have to act, and the Prime Minister should be making a public statement.
Neo Nazi attempts to target RNLI volunteers
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Ed Morrish @edmorrish.com · 08/09/2026
the clever thing about liberal media organisations mollycoddling fascists is that when the fascists get into power they will be grateful to the liberal media organisations and won’t try to destroy them!!!
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