scottish1979.bsky.social @scottish1979.bsky.social · 07/10/2026This chap does a full 500. An outstanding set of gags. 010
Reposted by @scottish1979.bsky.socialSmooth Dunk @smoothdunk2.bsky.social · 20/09/2026been thinkin about how robots are gonna kill us 9186851872
scottish1979.bsky.social @scottish1979.bsky.social · 15/09/2026God bless any Queen of the South fan who went to that. 000
Reposted by @scottish1979.bsky.socialAlex Andreou @sturdyalex.bsky.social · 10/09/2026This German comedy sketch (with English subtitles) perfectly captures so much of what is going on right now in the UK, the US, and across Europe. "Playing the 'Nazi Card' in the Third Reich", by Browser Ballett. 5330481288
Reposted by @scottish1979.bsky.socialPatrick Monahan @pattymo.com · 14/08/2025This is a masterpiece. Simply excellent www.instagram.com/reel/DMVGMIC... 22395722531
Reposted by @scottish1979.bsky.socialChauman @chaudman.bsky.social · 10/08/2026Norris McWhirter would be so conflicted. 19504108
scottish1979.bsky.social @scottish1979.bsky.social · 07/08/2026I went to see Belle and Sebastian last night. Joyful. 110
scottish1979.bsky.social @scottish1979.bsky.social · 03/08/2026If someone is described as never-compromisng, they're probably awful. Compromise is nice. 000
Reposted by @scottish1979.bsky.socialBoze Herrington, Library Owl @sketchesbyboze.bsky.social · 21/07/2026By far the funniest moment in Homer’s Odyssey is when Circe says, “Shall we have sex?” and Odysseus says, “You just turned all my men into pigs. You have the GALL to think I would sleep with you? Of course I will. Absolutely. But don’t do any weird spells” 10169691534
Reposted by @scottish1979.bsky.socialFinal Friztination @frizfrizzle.bsky.social · 19/07/2026Meta are sending Fucko the Knife Robot to stab you in the knee. To disable go to Accounts> Settings> Robots> Knife Robots> Fucko> Opt Out 4643031438
Reposted by @scottish1979.bsky.socialChauman @chaudman.bsky.social · 17/07/2026At least when it was all Nigerian princes there was some semblance of standards. Scammers these days wouldn't recognise pretend impoverished royalty if it slapped them in the face. 0132
Reposted by @scottish1979.bsky.socialHappyToast @happytoast.co.uk · 06/07/2026Dot is still troubled by her decision to let Nick die of a Heroin overdose. 1127138
Reposted by @scottish1979.bsky.socialChris Webb @chrisporkerwebb.bsky.social · 04/07/2026Happy 4th of July 37832
Reposted by @scottish1979.bsky.socialAsher Perlman @asherperlman.bsky.social · 21/06/2026Happy Father’s Day 153742455
scottish1979.bsky.social @scottish1979.bsky.social · 07/06/2026Most - Chris Hoy (By Susie Dent when I was on Countdown) Least - Shrek by a small Australian child. 100
Reposted by @scottish1979.bsky.socialAlex Elizabeth Byrne McMillan @undeniablyalex.bsky.social · 23/05/2026YOU’RE LISTENING TO SISYPHUS FM, THE HOME OF NON-STOP ROCK 6135471416425
Reposted by @scottish1979.bsky.socialThe Author, Séamas O'Reilly @seamas.bsky.social · 18/03/2024Very funny that Mr Beast's name is Jimmy Donaldson. The biggest Gen Z star on the planet, the most successful YouTuber of all time, and he has the name of a 55yo loyalist councillor who's made the news for trying to ban yoga in Lurgan and calling left handed children satanic. 15905126
Reposted by @scottish1979.bsky.socialMark Thomas @markthomasinfo.bsky.social · 06/03/2026Excuse my unspiritual language but fuck this shit. 29129
Reposted by @scottish1979.bsky.socialTom Cox @dj-acid-reflux.bsky.social · 01/03/2026There is far too much pressure to live your best life these days. Leave me alone and let me live my most middling life in peace, with the colourful miscellany of highs and lows that naturally entails. 937960
Reposted by @scottish1979.bsky.socialVote Blue 🌵🗳️💙🦋🇺🇸🇨🇦🇺🇦🇲🇽🇵🇦🇩🇰🇬🇱 @lflorepolitics.bsky.social · 28/09/2025I think this sums it up. He is a laughing stock around the world. “A festering carcass of American rot. A rotting pumpkin.” Thank you, Oliver from the UK👏 36690259
Reposted by @scottish1979.bsky.socialIan Martin @ianmartin.bsky.social · 09/01/2026Oh, shove your 'smart speaker' up your arse, Radio 3. "All without touching a button!" I DON'T MIND TOUCHING A BUTTON! I CAN COPE WITH TOUCHING A FUCKING BUTTON! Good morning. 058070
Reposted by @scottish1979.bsky.socialiucounu @iucounu.bsky.social · 15/12/2025—I’ve been asked to baptise the King of Spain’s daughter —Infanta? —No, holy water as usual. Weird thing to ask honestly 4643991064
Reposted by @scottish1979.bsky.socialZito @zeets.bsky.social · 09/12/2025Will Arnett was on Conan and told a story about how Conan dealt with the death of his parents by accusing Jason Bateman of killing them. It’s so funny. 119123462878
scottish1979.bsky.social @scottish1979.bsky.social · 09/12/2025media.tenor.coma man with a mustache is talking to another man while two other men look on .ALT: a man with a mustache is talking to another man while two other men look on . 000
Reposted by @scottish1979.bsky.socialJorge (he/him) @motoridersd.pug.ninja · 06/12/2025In S17 of #Taskmaster, Nick Mohammed dressed as a vampire for his tasks. The production scrubbed all his reflections when he's dressed like this, but the only way I knew is because someone told me about it. It's subtle and very cool. 2986284
Reposted by @scottish1979.bsky.socialSanjeev Kohli @govindajeggy.bsky.social · 30/11/2025Everyone knows St Patrick drove the snakes out of Ireland & St George slew that dragon. So why isn’t it common knowledge that St Andrew punched a pterodactyl in the face? Happy St Andrew’s Day 16313
Reposted by @scottish1979.bsky.socialStephen Collins @stephencollins.bsky.social · 13/11/2025Every ad now 8271823090
Reposted by @scottish1979.bsky.socialAnil Dash @anildash.com · 14/11/2025I give Catholic bishops a hard time often for all the obvious reasons, but this is beautiful and loving, and I'm deeply grateful to hear it. This can change hearts and save lives. 15955236
Reposted by @scottish1979.bsky.socialAlasdair Beckett-King @misterabk.bsky.social · 24/10/2025Let me tell you a story (before the ship explodes): 762082646
scottish1979.bsky.social @scottish1979.bsky.social · 06/10/2025@dj-acid-reflux.bsky.social @nivenj1.bsky.social my sons came up with the goods for my birthday. 161
Reposted by @scottish1979.bsky.socialmindflakes @mindflakes.bsky.social · 05/10/2025Can't even say "shiver me timbers" or call your coworkers "landlubbers" any more without people making all kinds of assumptions about you 520231
Reposted by @scottish1979.bsky.socialCorduroy Cheddar @corduroycheddar.bsky.social · 20/08/2025(during sex) Yes, this is a professional tenor kazoo and yes, it has a different and much warmer timbre than a student version. Do you still want that orgasm or are you going to keep asking questions? (angrily continues playing the kazoo) 110225
Reposted by @scottish1979.bsky.socialDraculosity Jones: Ghost Skeleton @brainmage.bsky.social · 07/08/2025Me: The rack? You're going to torture me with boobs?? Maybe after that i can suffer the Thighs lmao Medieval torturer: See it's this kind of thing that got you here in the first place 141671325
scottish1979.bsky.social @scottish1979.bsky.social · 06/08/2025@nivenj1.bsky.social is the shopping centre in Irvine where the Albanian lads have been done for growing the weed the same place your dad worked at? 100
Reposted by @scottish1979.bsky.socialIan Martin @ianmartin.bsky.social · 06/08/2025Oh dear, how sad, never mind. 2012919
scottish1979.bsky.social @scottish1979.bsky.social · 18/07/2025In France Scottie Scheffler is called Scottie Cauliflower. #opengolf 010
scottish1979.bsky.social @scottish1979.bsky.social · 28/06/2025The mid-song banter of Jarvis Cocker is a tad Shuttleworthesque and I'm absolutely fine with that. #glastonbury #pulp 020
Reposted by @scottish1979.bsky.socialGreg the Miller @gregthemiller.bsky.social · 28/06/2025ewok is short for electronic wok 10459125
Reposted by @scottish1979.bsky.socialAthena Kugblenu @athenakugblenu.bsky.social · 24/04/2025I think he likes it. He speaks, the market goes down. He speaks again, the market goes up. Reminds me of a child playing with the bell on a bus 3328
scottish1979.bsky.social @scottish1979.bsky.social · 21/04/2025The best thing about today's news is thinking about how bored Trump's going to be at the funeral mass. 000
scottish1979.bsky.social @scottish1979.bsky.social · 15/04/2025This is the sort of thing social media is for. Gives me hope. 1102
Reposted by @scottish1979.bsky.socialMꙬse Allain @mooseallain.bsky.social · 11/04/2025Schrödinger’s cat Venn 721424
Reposted by @scottish1979.bsky.social🎃 Imani Gandy Corn 🎃 @angryblacklady.blacksky.app · 07/04/2025I just need everyone to watch this and understand I have been laughing about it for 24 hours 20456081545
Reposted by @scottish1979.bsky.socialKarla Pacheco! @thekarlapacheco.bsky.social · 04/04/2025"Everything reminds me of her" I whisper, as I walk past a tree shaped like a bitch 222546431
![[Scene is a kitchen - a middle aged woman called JANET is boiling peas at the stove. A younger more colourfully dressed woman named LIZ approached her.]
JANET:
Ugh...
LIZ:
What's up?
JANET:
I am so bored of cooking peas!
LIZ:
Have you tried...
AI peas?
JANET:
AI peas?
LIZ:
They're peas with AI!
[Liz holds up to us a packet of peas labelled: Pea-i AI - Peas with AI].
LIZ:
Al-powered peas harness the potential of your peas
JANET:
What
LIZ [Now a voiceover as we cut to a whizzy technology diagram of peas all connected by meaningless dotted lines]
Why not take your peas to the next level with Al Peas' new Al tools to power your peas?
[Show a techno diagram of a pea with a label reading 'AI' pointing to a random zone in it]
LIZ:
Each pea has Al in a way we haven't quite worked out yet but it's fine
[Show Janet and Liz now in a Matrix-style world of peas]
LIZ:
With Al peas you can supercharge productivity and make AI work for your peas!
JANET:
What
LIZ:
Shut up
LIZ:
Our game-changing Pea-Al gives you the freedom to unlock the potential of the power of the future of your peas workflow
From opening the bag of peas
to boiling the peas
to eating the peas
To spending millions on adding Al to the peas and then having to work out what that even means.
JANET:
Is it really necessary to-
LIZ [Grabbing Janet by the collar]:
THE PEAS HAVE GOT AI, JANET
[Cut to an advert ending screen, with the bag of peas and the slogan:
AI PEAS: Just 'Peas' for god's sake buy the AI peas.
[Ends]](https://cdn.bsky.app/img/feed_thumbnail/plain/did:plc:4m3we4apbjayclzcnhwe3pfp/bafkreiayqa37f7kik7l7s7fbtfp2sir5ckb662ry2lylinyjrfa2rkvvka)
