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Jonathan

@jonathankessel.bsky.social
213 followers 209 following 342 posts

Minnesotan in the South Metro. Wondering if we're in the Walternate and Fauxlivia universe and if there's a soft spot nearby.

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dan mentos @danmentos.com · 22/09/2026
[job interview] interviewer: so god killed all your kids? job: that's right
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Angie Nixon @angieforfl.bsky.social · 18h
I don't wanna COUCH my words here: I know JD Vance, his eyeliner, and absent Ashley Moody are used to running away from people when things get tough because they care more about themselves and their billionaire buddies than the people they represent. But this is my home. /1
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Sharon 🪳🌹 @sharonk.bsky.social · 01/10/2026
related to this: please for the love of God do not appoint another Republican as FBI director
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Jonathan @jonathankessel.bsky.social · 29/09/2026
Watching the Jack Smith hearing, and it turns out Darlene Graham is actually an above replacement level Republican senator (extremely derogatory)
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Mayor Zohran Kwame Mamdani @mayor.nyc.gov · 25/09/2026
Tonight begins the Jewish harvest festival of Sukkot. May a sukkat shalom — a shelter of peace — spread over our city. To all celebrating: Gut Yontif and Chag Sukkot Sameach!
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lauren @lauren.rotatingsandwiches.com · 24/09/2026
ME: So I can't put anything else on the scale? ANUBIS: No. Just your heart ME: No money, no good deeds? ANUBIS: No ME: What about steam points? I've got a ton of steam points ANUBIS: The point is to be lighter than the feather ME: I was just hoping to finally do something with the steam points
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NY Times Pitchbot @nytpitchbot.bsky.social · 23/09/2026
Minnesota is a shit hole that I’m embarrassed to live in. Here’s why Minnesotans should make me their next senator. by Michele Tafoya
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Ed Markey @edmarkey.bsky.social · 22/09/2026
With @peggyflanagan.bsky.social and the wave of progressive candidates building across the country, we are going to secure a bigger, brighter future for all. Show up to the polls. Organize. Do everything you can to send our movement to the Senate this November.
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McSweeney's @mcsweeneys.net · 21/09/2026
"I ate some Skittles I found lying around while cooking, but there were zero food ingredients in them. I checked. So it was like eating air." buff.ly/D1rJmFG
buff.ly
A Conversation Between Two People on Yom Kippur Who Definitely Fasted
A: Nothing other than plain water for me too. And a little bit of coffee. B: Of course, coffee doesn’t count. Wouldn’t want a headache. Our people have suffe...
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🍁 Levi Kornelsen @levikornelsen.bsky.social · 19/09/2026
Reacher (book) kills white supremacists (fictional), but Reacher (streaming) hasn't yet despite Alan Ritchson (Reacher (streaming)) wanting to because of studio fear of white supremacists (actual, government).
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Stephanie 🍉 @ageofoddish.bsky.social · 18/09/2026
mmygod
the slut gnomes of false berlin jeopardy bluesky posttoday's jeopardy categories. the last 2 are "false berlin" and "bizarre little men"
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Hennepin County Attorney Mary Moriarty @hennepinatty.bsky.social · 16/09/2026
Hennepin County Attorney Mary Moriarty statement on Christian Castro:
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cait (and adonis) @cait.bsky.social · 16/09/2026
I keep seeing videos of a guy who catches crabs and lobsters, cracks all the barnacles off them, puts a shrimp in their claws and throws them back. can you imagine. abducted by aliens but they just give you a spa day and hand you two hot dogs and let you go
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Stellbound: Stellraiser II @antlervel.vet · 15/09/2026
My character thirty minutes after setting foot in Hellfire Peninsula
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Peeved Professor aka Ann Tifa @peevedccprof.bsky.social · 14/09/2026
Look, everyone is entitled to celebrate in their own way. Don’t judge.
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Lt. Governor Peggy Flanagan @ltgovflanagan.mn.gov · 11/09/2026
Shana Tovah to our family, friends, and neighbors celebrating Rosh Hashanah. Wishing everyone a happy, healthy, and peaceful new year!
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Abdul El-Sayed @abdulelsayed.bsky.social · 11/09/2026
Tonight marks the beginning of Rosh Hashanah, the Jewish New Year. Wishing peace, hope, happiness, and health to all who celebrate in Michigan. Shana Tova!
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Mayor Zohran Kwame Mamdani @mayor.nyc.gov · 11/09/2026
Shanah Tovah, New York! Wishing all Jewish New Yorkers celebrating a sweet, joyful and meaningful Rosh Hashanah. Here’s to a new year filled with health, happiness and blessings (and yes, even another Knicks championship).
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Joaquin Castro @joaquincastrotx.bsky.social · 10/09/2026
Today I reunited with Liam Conejo Ramos and his father Adrian at his school, Valley View Elementary in Minnesota. The last time I was with them, I was escorting them back home from the Dilley Trailer Prison. Liam's mom was 3 months pregnant at the time. Today, I met Liam's new brother.
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Adam Miller @ajm6792.bsky.social · 07/09/2026
You have to give Demuth credit. It is beyond bold to run, in 2026, on a tax cut for rich people.
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John Moe @johnmoe.bsky.social · 07/09/2026
Someday I’m going to figure out where Shankar Vedantam hid that brain.
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Man in Business Suit Levitating @dfeldman.org · 04/09/2026
Everyone on this web site is either trans or lives in Minnesota If you’re not trans, then congrats, your complimentary bus ticket, State Fair coupon book, salted nut roll and whistle are in the mail
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Sleeping with Celebrities @sleepwithcelebs.bsky.social · 02/09/2026
How long would it take to tell you everything about how to punt one (1) football? For @chriswarcraft.bsky.social, at least an hour. Maybe more. Kick off, or punt off, the NFL season with a soothingly detailed walk through of giving the ball to the other team. maximumfun.org/episodes/sle...
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beetle moses @beetlemoses.bsky.social · 31/08/2026
Three panel comic. Panel 1: in a diner, a waitress looks over her shoulder to watch a TV mounted on the wall. A news reporter is one screen, surrounded with text that reads FOUR DEAD and DEVELOPING STORY. The reporter says, “please be advised— the murderer is still at large.” Panel 2: the reporter continues, “here’s their photo.” He gestures with his pen towards a photo next to him. The photo is a guinea pig wearing a multicolored propeller hat. Panel 3: the waitress watches the TV pensively. Behind her at the diner counter is a guinea pig in a propeller hat, seated before a plate with an entire head of lettuce. This may be the murderer in question but at this stage I’d only be speculating.
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Shecky @shecky.bsky.social · 27/08/2026
Still no takers. I don't *understand*, and it's killing me. LOOK AT THESE FACES.
Torbie cat standing on bed, looking up.Gray cat with small white flash on throat, sitting on bed, looking up.
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Karen Attiah @karenattiah.bsky.social · 24/08/2026
BREAKING: After the Washington Post fired me last year for speaking the truth in the wake of the Charlie Kirk killing, I fought back. And I'm happy to announce: I won my case against the Washington Post. They have been ordered to reinstate me immediately. www.nytimes.com/2026/08/24/b...
nytimes.com
Washington Post Ordered to Rehire Fired Columnist Karen Attiah
An arbitrator ordered the newspaper to reinstate Karen Attiah, who was fired after posting about “white men who espouse hatred and violence” following Charlie Kirk’s killing.
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Jess Hanson @jesshansonmn.bsky.social · 23/08/2026
Join me in my work to promote the #PoliticsOfCare where we do the most good for the most people. Send me back to St Paul to keep up the fight against Big Tech, to help protect kids and women from sexual predators, and to help build a future we can be proud of. $10 or $1000 make a huge difference!
secure.actblue.com
Donate to our campaign today and invest in the #PoliticsOfCare!
Join in the #PoliticsOfCare! Contribute an amount meaningful to you today >>
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Trans News Network @transnews.network · 21/08/2026
"If trans people want a boycott of The New York Times, where's the call to do so?" Here is a declaration laying out how the NYT is a key driver of trans genocide, why boycotts work and why anyone who gives a damn about trans lives and rights must boycott The New York Times.
transnews.network
Boycott The New York Times
For years The New York Times has relentlessly pushed anti-trans propaganda, playing a significant role in the escalating genocide against us. It's far past time for a call to action: anyone who cares ...
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Eli Sherman @elitalksmpls.bsky.social · 19/08/2026
A statement from the DFL Jewish Community in Support of Peggy Flanagan:
Jews in Minnesota believe our state, nation, and world will not be served by another Trump yes vote in the Senate. At a time when the Trump administration invaded houses of worship with spies and empowered antisemites among its army of influencers, Peggy Flanagan has been a strong voice for human rights without regard to race, color, or religious creed. Jews who claim to speak for us who misrepresent that do not speak in our name.

Peggy has broad support among Jewish Minnesotans as evidenced by her smashing 20-point primary win. We proudly endorse her and will work tirelessly to make her Minnesota’s next US Senator.
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John Moe @johnmoe.bsky.social · 19/08/2026
Here's a video of that first new episode. It's just me talking and trying not to get emotionally overwhelmed. youtu.be/L8ZSOdD1scs?...
youtu.be
Welcome Back to The Hilarious World of Depression. Yes, It's a New Episode. In 2026.
YouTube video by john moe
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Chaucer Doth Tweet @levostregc.bsky.social · 18/08/2026
Roses are redde A goode gin ys Tanqueray Hath Nancy Mace Reade all of *Mrs. Dalloway*?
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Mitch @mitchas.bsky.social · 18/08/2026
Oh nooo guys we missed an important anniversary 30 years ago yesterday, @alyankovic.bsky.social visited the biggest ball of twine in Minnesota
Facebook post screenshot from the "Darwin MN Twine Ball" Facebook page:

"Oh my goodness, y'all! Today is the 30th anniversary of the day Weird AL visited our Twin Ball! Come celebrate!"

With photos of Weird Al and the Twine Ball 

One photo dated Aug 16, 1996
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Mika Fae Queen of Night 🏳️‍⚧️ @msmaxwellmusic.bsky.social · 15/08/2026
this has real "final video log on derelict space freighter" vibes
Kamala Harris Zoom call with the words Be "Ruthless"
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1st Minnesota Volunteers Stan Account @himdogson.bsky.social · 12/08/2026
let me paint a picture for you. imagine angie craig is james longstreet's rebs streaming into the gap in the union line foolishly left by dan sickles the useless wastrel. now imagine peggy flanagan is the men of the first minnesota
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Keith Ellison, Minnesota Attorney General @keithellison.bsky.social · 12/08/2026
Time to turn up the ORGANIZING volume! 84 days to defeat the purveyors tax cuts for the super rich, to defeat Trump’s paramilitary immigration bullies, fight the historic corruption, to invest in homes and hospitals and not bombs and forever wars, and throw dark money out of our politics. #LFG
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Peggy Flanagan @peggyflanagan.bsky.social · 12/08/2026
I am truly honored and humbled to be Minnesota’s Democratic nominee for U.S. Senate. Thank you, Minnesota – for everything.
I love you, Minnesota! Miigwech, thank you for everything!
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Ian Coldwater 🧊🚫 @lookitup.baby · 12/08/2026
That sound you hear is Minnesota loudly saying FUCK ICE
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William Gibson @greatdismal.bsky.social · 11/08/2026
youtu.be/pk_7shQenFE
youtu.be
Cowboy Junkies - Sweet Jane - Tonight Show 5/4/89 high quality stereo
YouTube video by Cleveland Live Music
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Ran Blekhman @blekhman.bsky.social · 09/08/2026
Huge faculty recruitment effort at the University of Chicago -- a division-wide, open-rank search looking to hire about 20 faculty across 5 research areas in biology. Come be our colleague! Full announcement: uchicago.app.box.com/s/ckih9zv3rj...
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SE Gyges @segyges.bsky.social · 09/08/2026
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Ross Sayers @rosssayers.bsky.social · 27/07/2026
[James Stewart as Odysseus] now listen here, Agamemnon, I'm going home, y'see. You keep your fancy armour, I'm getting off this crummy ol' beach. [Spotting the Cyclops] now here's a curious fella, he's only got one peeper
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Stella Biderman @stellaathena.bsky.social · 07/08/2026
If you have more than even a passing interest in AI, watching this talk is more important than whatever it is you are currently doing. There’s a lot of cybersec jargon at times but I don’t think you need to know anything about security to understand what’s important. youtu.be/87DyyMV0kCY
youtu.be
Black Hat USA 2026: The 'Breaking' News: The OpenAI–Hugging Face Incident
YouTube video by Black Hat
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Kevin M. Kruse @kevinmkruse.bsky.social · 02/08/2026
The Senate is important, but state legislatures are just as big and, as the post notes, these races are a lot more effective use of your dollar.
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Chris Kluwe @chriswarcraft.bsky.social · 02/08/2026
THINGS ALLOWED TO BE ANXIOUS WHEN THEY HAVE UNEXPRESSED THOUGHTS - infants - cocker spaniels - your buddy Craig who works at 7-11 and is high all the time THINGS NOT ALLOWED TO BE ANXIOUS - people who can launch nuclear weaponry
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Fiona Taylor @fionataylor.bsky.social · 30/07/2026
It’s been really challenging (for me) to write satire in a world where everything has been heightened beyond satire, but I wrote a piece! (Shout out to my girl @brookepreston.bsky.social for giving me helpful feedback on an early draft.) www.mcsweeneys.net/articles/a-f...
mcsweeneys.net
A Field Guide to Legacy Media Pundits in the United States
The Family Values Pundit (Divorcio moralisticus) HABITAT: New York Times bestseller list and a weekly column. DISTINCTIVE CALL: “As a man with a deeply unhap...
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New-Cleckit Dominie @ncdominie.bsky.social · 28/07/2026
This is just to say I have OCRed the text thet was in tne arch:ve and whicb yov were prabaldy seamhing for "breahtast" Fargme ms fheg mem debo:w5 sb ?mccf mmb 5c oc1b
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C. Robert Cargill @crobertcargill.bsky.social · 26/07/2026
A meme using images of Scully from The X-Files getting increasingly more interested at what she's reading on the computer. It is in the style of the Vince McMahon meme. It reads

They are making a Neruomancer TV Show

For Apple+

JD Dillard is co-creating it

William Gibson is thrilled with it
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