iiinova — where your digital self keeps evolving

[Big Scream] @turdfartlet.bsky.social · 2h

Some of you never put a fork in the garbage disposal and it really TINGTINGTINGTATINGTATINGTING

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[Big Scream] @turdfartlet.bsky.social · 11h

"Cowerbunga, dude," Leonardo intones, menacing the Domino's clerk with a gun.

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[Big Scream] @turdfartlet.bsky.social · 13h

RESPEC THE DRIP! REALLOCATE SKILL POINTS INTO NEW DRIP STATS!! UNLOCK HIGH LEVEL DRIP TECHNIQUES TO KILL GOD!!!

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[Big Scream] @turdfartlet.bsky.social · 17h

*sitting backwards in a chair* Hey fellas, let's try to put the "pal" in "phallus"

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Sorrowscopes @sorrowscopes.bsky.social · 22h

Gemini: You see yourself as the main character in your own movie, but the reality is that you’re just an extra who keeps looking into the camera.

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It's Abby. Yep @itsabbyyep.bsky.social · 30/10/2023

Be careful! During Halloween, the veil between our world and the great beyond is at its thinnest. You will never be in more danger of becoming an actual slutty nurse

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[Big Scream] @turdfartlet.bsky.social · 11/10/2026

Birds: *exist* House Cat: "And I took that personally."

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[Big Scream] @turdfartlet.bsky.social · 10/10/2026

Therapist: What's the problem? Clown: I don't think I'm very good at my job Therapist: Nonsense! Tell me a joke Clown: The best cameras to photograph the arctic are Pole-aroids. Therapist: Have you considered grave digging?

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[Big Scream] @turdfartlet.bsky.social · 10/10/2026

We need to spend less time developing AI (Artificial Intelligence) and more time developing AI (Arcane Incantations)

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[Big Scream] @turdfartlet.bsky.social · 11/10/2026

Oh fuck Deafheaven is fucken heavy now

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Amy Vants to Suck Your Blood 🩸 @msfoxifurnasty.bsky.social · 10/10/2026

my favorite part of automobile maintenance is when the car guy brings me a part and says, “look how messed up this is” and I’m like “yeah, totally” and we both know i have no idea what they’re showing me and we both know i’m gonna pay for a new whizdongle anyway

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[Big Scream] @turdfartlet.bsky.social · 10/10/2026

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batkaren @batkaren.bsky.social · 28/02/2024

Calm down, babe, you’re not listening—I said they’re MAGIC beans.

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[Big Scream] @turdfartlet.bsky.social · 10/10/2026

We need to spend less time developing AI (Artificial Intelligence) and more time developing AI (Arcane Incantations)

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[Big Scream] @turdfartlet.bsky.social · 10/10/2026

When people say they could go for a "hot cuppa" they're referring to a "hot cup" of piss

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[Big Scream] @turdfartlet.bsky.social · 10/10/2026

I got your data center right here! *gestures at an owner's manual for a 1993 Ford Taurus*

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[Big Scream] @turdfartlet.bsky.social · 10/10/2026

My new phone has a phish eye lens so now it takes me about 10 minutes to take a single boring picture.

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weeder @weeder.bsky.social · 10/10/2026

Headlines used to be like "Lawmakers Spar Over Budget Concerns" Now they're all "Powerful Wizards Warn of a World-Ending Magic, Mad King Unconvinced"

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[Big Scream] @turdfartlet.bsky.social · 10/10/2026

*Tony Hawk Pro Skater trick sfx plays after I get exactly $7 of gas*

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[Big Scream] @turdfartlet.bsky.social · 10/10/2026

Me: I will NOT be glut-shamed! Demon from 3rd Circle of Hell: C'mon man that's my whole thing!

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cap’n watsisname @capnwatsisname.bsky.social · 30/09/2026

Careful, the plate is hot. And the fork. Actually I microwaved all the dinnerware for 25 minutes.

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[Big Scream] @turdfartlet.bsky.social · 10/10/2026

A few of the carrots should've violently snapped in half just to spice things up

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[Big Scream] @turdfartlet.bsky.social · 10/10/2026

Lol I'm just screaming into the void on here at this point

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[Big Scream] @turdfartlet.bsky.social · 07/10/2026

Sisyphus: What's that? Daedalus: My new invention. I call it "The Bra" Sisyphus: Any cool nicknames for it? Daedalus: Over the shoulder boulder holder Sisyphus: *losing his shit*

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[Big Scream] @turdfartlet.bsky.social · 10/10/2026

*rolls a nat 20 and shits your pants*

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[Big Scream] @turdfartlet.bsky.social · 09/10/2026

*trick-shots a glass of communion wine up my own ass from across the church parking lot*

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Ed Morrish @edmorrish.com · 09/10/2026

hello computer, decompile and distill sonic the hedgehog 2 make the game set in my hometown, with each zone as a different area make the main character me make it so I never lose my rings and get all the chaos emeralds first go give knuckles large naturals put shrek in it give shrek large naturals

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[Big Scream] @turdfartlet.bsky.social · 09/10/2026

*grunts and a piece of The Titanic falls out*

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[Big Scream] @turdfartlet.bsky.social · 09/10/2026

Me: I've been really bad all year so for Halloween I asked for 5 cursed blood vials Mall Cop whose lap I'm sitting in: That's great but I have to piss.

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Johnny Normality (Spooky Mode) @probgobl.in · 09/10/2026

The best part of Halloween season? Lots of fun craft projects to use up all those horse bones. The worst part of Halloween season? The veil between our world and Horse Hell thins enough for angry horse ghosts to seek revenge.

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[Big Scream] @turdfartlet.bsky.social · 08/10/2026

Stagflation is what happens when you put a balloon factory too close to a nature preserve.

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[Big Scream] @turdfartlet.bsky.social · 08/10/2026

I'm choosing not to do good posts. I could definitely do some real bangers if I wanted but honestly, just not really feeling it.

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[Big Scream] @turdfartlet.bsky.social · 07/10/2026

Anyone can hang dong, but it takes a revolution to guillotine dong.

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[Big Scream] @turdfartlet.bsky.social · 07/10/2026

*consumes enough caffeine to fight the moon and win*

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Skellyton 🦇 @infinitefinite.blog · 06/10/2026

for personal reasons, I will be disappearing into the misty forest, never to be seen or heard from again

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[Big Scream] @turdfartlet.bsky.social · 07/10/2026

Me: *getting my ass kicked in volleyball* Friend: Should you be inside the machine like that? Me: *roughly spherical* Don't tell me how to live my life

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[Big Scream] @turdfartlet.bsky.social · 07/10/2026

Me: Damn girl, is that a banana in your pocket or are you just happy to see me? Gorilla whose enclosure I jumped into: *drags finger across throat*

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[Big Scream] @turdfartlet.bsky.social · 07/10/2026

Sisyphus: What's that? Daedalus: My new invention. I call it "The Bra" Sisyphus: Any cool nicknames for it? Daedalus: Over the shoulder boulder holder Sisyphus: *losing his shit*

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Blair Spookily @blairloudly.bsky.social · 07/10/2026

im just offal i say with a wink as i turn myself inside out

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[Big Scream] @turdfartlet.bsky.social · 07/10/2026

Me: I never mix business with pleasure Interviewer: Then I don't think you'd be a good fit for the position Me: Why not?? [camera pans up revealing I'm interviewing for a job at the dildo factory]

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[Big Scream] @turdfartlet.bsky.social · 07/10/2026

When a horse gets really hungry laughing at a joke about oats it starts chomping at the bit.

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[Big Scream] @turdfartlet.bsky.social · 06/10/2026

DEMONMAXXING HAS NEVER BEEN EASIER THANKS TO THIS CONJURING HACK

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[Big Scream] @turdfartlet.bsky.social · 06/10/2026

"You just activated my RAP card!!" *starts rapping badly*

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[Big Scream] @turdfartlet.bsky.social · 06/10/2026

Boss: Are you dense?? Me: *predominantly composed of platinum group metals* Very.

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[Big Scream] @turdfartlet.bsky.social · 06/10/2026

Friend: You doing anything special for Halloween? Me: I've been chockpiling candy all year Friend: u mean stockpiling? Me: *disappearing beneath a mountain of Reese's Cups*

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[Big Scream] @turdfartlet.bsky.social · 06/10/2026

Coworker: *farts* Better out than in I always say! Me: That mean you've crammed farts up yer butt on occasion? Coworker: What? Me: *way too close* You a fart crammer??

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[Big Scream] @turdfartlet.bsky.social · 06/10/2026

Therapist: How was your childhood? Me: I lived in the sap of suxury Therapist: You mean lap of luxury? Me: *remembers constantly getting stuck to everything* Wow that sounds way better

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