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Taran

@sisypheandaydreams.bsky.social
51 followers 79 following 94 posts

:^)

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Reposted by Taran
Tamper Proof Lid @readuction.bsky.social · 07/07/2025
Love to go to work plentiful cap
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Taran @sisypheandaydreams.bsky.social · 11/05/2025
Giant’s hand descended from the clouds, picked me up and they blew my eyelashes off like I was a dandelion :(
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Taran @sisypheandaydreams.bsky.social · 11/05/2025
I’m 80% sure when my friend played me Sax Man by Jack Black in high school. She spent 10 minutes singing it a cappella beforehand & made it so much funnier bc of the fucked up saxophone impressions she was cracking us up with 🤭
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Gef the Toking Mongoose @geftokingmongoose.bsky.social · 28/03/2025
I'm not gonna lie I would love to live deliciously
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Taran @sisypheandaydreams.bsky.social · 05/03/2025
But it comes out like “GAAAH- KYAAAH- - GAAAAHH instead #sad
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Taran @sisypheandaydreams.bsky.social · 05/03/2025
You’re telling me a macadamia nut in this cookie?
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Taran @sisypheandaydreams.bsky.social · 05/03/2025
The macadamia nut cookie of it all
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Taran @sisypheandaydreams.bsky.social · 04/03/2025
WE COME IN PEACE 👽
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Little Greenis @durtmchurtt.bsky.social · 02/03/2025
KID: i hate Arizona. DAD: me Tucson.
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Tamper Proof Lid @readuction.bsky.social · 18/02/2025
Using the crying emoji to react to everything in MS Teams
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Taran @sisypheandaydreams.bsky.social · 14/02/2025
Frugal archers! Make haste and harvest the wayward shafts of Cupid’s spent arrows littering the streets tonight
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Howard Ashman 🔪stab🔪 account @michaelchu7.bsky.social · 14/02/2025
You: They did the math. Me: ᵀʰᵉʸ ᵈⁱᵈ ᵗʰᵉ ᵐᵒⁿˢᵗᵉʳ ᵐᵃᵗʰ You: What was that? Me: Nothing. Me three hours later in a whisper: ᴵᵗ ʷᵃˢ ᵃ ᵍʳᵃᵛᵉʸᵃʳᵈ ᵍʳᵃᵖʰ
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ruiner @deathcarpets.enterdeepfo.rest · 14/02/2025
i’ve been asked to leave my tech job after i badly misinterpreted what a “standup meeting” was and performed my tight five about dating apps to a bewildered zoom call
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Taran @sisypheandaydreams.bsky.social · 14/02/2025
*Cocteau Twins voice* Punxsutawney Phiiiiiil, Punxsutawney Phiiiiiil, Punxsutawney Phiiiiiil
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Taran @sisypheandaydreams.bsky.social · 14/02/2025
To the person that said the lyric’s of Serpentskirt’s chorus are “Punxsutawney Phil” x50….I’m coming to get you. I’m cooking this ear-worm into your next omelette. A worm is going to die. Do you feel bad? Ralph the worm. Who had a life, and a semi-successful pyramid scheme he ran, and 3 pet fleas—
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Taran @sisypheandaydreams.bsky.social · 02/02/2025
Five pops AND it woke my dog up I’m a cursed wretched beast
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Taran @sisypheandaydreams.bsky.social · 02/02/2025
My elbow is a noisy opp whomst disturbs my four legged son’s slumber. My right foot- Pure crack cocaine. Practically its own musical instrument. Not an impressive one, perhaps in the same tier as a triangle. Anyways I’m gonna to go crack my feet after this skeet
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Taran @sisypheandaydreams.bsky.social · 02/02/2025
“I’m shifting! I’m shifting!” I exclaim. (Not into an alternate universe) (Just warning my dog so he isn’t alarmed when my glow-stick of a body cracks for the 40th time that day)
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Taran @sisypheandaydreams.bsky.social · 02/02/2025
OH MY GOD HI MAUNSELL FORTS!!! I feel like Elvis just personally grated Parmesan on my pasta right now I love you it’s okay I’ll bring a Camelbak and a thick cardigan I’ll make it work<3333
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tinybaby @tiny.baby · 18/01/2025
more professions should have unique and stupid hats
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Taran @sisypheandaydreams.bsky.social · 19/01/2025
Thankfully I fully reentered my Tumblr era last month so I won’t be clawing at the walls without tokkytiktac~
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Taran @sisypheandaydreams.bsky.social · 15/01/2025
“Can you test my Calendly link for me?” Ofc I got you bestie:
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Taran @sisypheandaydreams.bsky.social · 12/01/2025
Tree
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Taran @sisypheandaydreams.bsky.social · 12/01/2025
Gonna doxx a bird
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Taran @sisypheandaydreams.bsky.social · 08/01/2025
The un-pluraled game really sold this skeet *likes skeet*
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Sarah Andersen @sarahseeandersen.bsky.social · 25/12/2024
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ceej @ceej.online · 25/12/2024
laughing in bed, sleigh crashing through the roof and impaling me in slow motion as gary jules’ cover of mad world plays
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Taran @sisypheandaydreams.bsky.social · 25/12/2024
Had to surrender mine to the prawn shop 😔
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Taran @sisypheandaydreams.bsky.social · 25/12/2024
I’ve been deemed an upstanding citizen within Santa’s panopticon. My reward this year is socks :)
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ً @zan.bsky.social · 25/12/2024
The Xanax You Gave Linus Weren’t Real, Charlie Brown. You Have The Right To Remain Silent
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words @words.bsky.social · 25/12/2024
hawk tuah the herald angels sing you just gotta spit on that thing
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ً @zan.bsky.social · 23/12/2024
millennial ting she going grink mode till i meep
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Dead Reckons @gregreckons.bsky.social · 25/12/2024
Who up shoveling reindeer poop off they roofs?
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soul nate @mnateshyamalan.bsky.social · 25/12/2024
charles dickens really popped off when he came up with “humbug!” that shit was like bazinga for old fuckers with ass taste in pajamas
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Taran @sisypheandaydreams.bsky.social · 23/12/2024
An elote-ning thought right here
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Taran @sisypheandaydreams.bsky.social · 19/12/2024
Spelling the name Phoebe pmo. But what’s the alternative? Feebi? I’m incensed.
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Taran @sisypheandaydreams.bsky.social · 16/12/2024
HELL YEAH BROTHER 🥰
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Taran @sisypheandaydreams.bsky.social · 16/12/2024
It’s Preen The Loose Hairs Out Of My Head Like A Wild And Free Flamingo O’Clock
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Taran @sisypheandaydreams.bsky.social · 27/11/2024
That’s fine, we’ll take it out of his allowance. He’ll text you the tracking number after he stops weeping and shitting himself
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Taran @sisypheandaydreams.bsky.social · 27/11/2024
That’s fine. He can sit on the floor. I’m making him mail it back now after he stops crying
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Taran @sisypheandaydreams.bsky.social · 27/11/2024
Me: Nice coat :) Duck: *screams* Chicken: *screams* Turkey: *screams*
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Taran @sisypheandaydreams.bsky.social · 27/11/2024
What if the duck is claustrophobic?
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Taran @sisypheandaydreams.bsky.social · 27/11/2024
I love when SZA goes aaAAAaaAAAaaaaaAh
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It's Abby. Yep @itsabbyyep.bsky.social · 13/11/2024
Baby: [cries] Cat Nanny: [slowly pushes baby off changing table]
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Tommytoughstuff @tommytoughstuff.bsky.social · 25/11/2024
[Date] I'm going to use the restroom *leans over table* and I counted my onion rings, there's six.
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Taran @sisypheandaydreams.bsky.social · 23/11/2024
Yumyumyumyum!!! Bluebewwy pweaaaase!
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nora "nora.jewelry is now open" rude (they/them ze/hir) @nora.zone · 23/11/2024
you don't need to trust someone to fuck them
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Taran @sisypheandaydreams.bsky.social · 22/11/2024
Consider a spay, or we will all pay 😔 I cannot lose another garlic harvest for the consequences of a nut
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Taran @sisypheandaydreams.bsky.social · 22/11/2024
Your contributions spare us from locusts one month more
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Taran @sisypheandaydreams.bsky.social · 22/11/2024
Congratulations! It’s an egg! 🫄🏻
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