iiinova — where your digital self keeps evolving

Line Art Lionheart @notalogin.bsky.social · 29/09/2026

Sen. Schmitt’s embarrassing Hawks/Hawkeyes mixup is a distraction from the fact that the rest of his proposed conspiracy theory makes no fucking sense either

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Line Art Lionheart @notalogin.bsky.social · 24/09/2026

No matter how well I know otherwise, my first reaction is still that "dinero" is Spanish for 'dinner.'

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Line Art Lionheart @notalogin.bsky.social · 07/03/2024

DIVORCE LAWYER: She cheated on you? ME: Well, no, they used a bed

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Line Art Lionheart @notalogin.bsky.social · 28/04/2025

The USA's national bird is the bald eagle, known for its majesty in flight. Canadians also admire bald eagles, for being very soary.

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Line Art Lionheart @notalogin.bsky.social · 19/08/2024

The best computer games teach us important truths about ourselves; I've learned that I would make a kickass rescue plumber

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Line Art Lionheart @notalogin.bsky.social · 23/09/2026

ME: if a pet is basically a member of the family... WIFE: we've been over this... we're not putting grandma to sleep

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Line Art Lionheart @notalogin.bsky.social · 02/09/2026

SCAT COP: 🎶Be-doo-be-doo-deep-bop OTHER SCAT COP: *shits on table* CHIEF: not that kind of scat! SC1: Bop-deep-bdoop-ba-bop SUSPECT: OK, I confess.

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Line Art Lionheart @notalogin.bsky.social · 09/09/2026

INDIGNANT HUSBAND: Get my wife's name out of your mouth [background: the wife's name is Taffy] ME [mouth full of taffy]: I'WM TFYING

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Line Art Lionheart @notalogin.bsky.social · 22/09/2026

If I were a cat, I sure as fuck wouldn't be posting on the Internet

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It's Abby. Yep @itsabbyyep.bsky.social · 03/11/2024

Them: Let’s get together! What’s your calendar look like? Me: Same picture of a dog on it till text month

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Line Art Lionheart @notalogin.bsky.social · 28/03/2024

Few things are as magical as the crack of the bat, but then again I've always had a thing for the butts of flying mammals.

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Line Art Lionheart @notalogin.bsky.social · 18/09/2026

Might be time for US gas stations to learn from the Europeans and start pricing gas by the liter

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Line Art Lionheart @notalogin.bsky.social · 13/01/2025

A scientist who studies Adam's apples is called a guyneckologist.

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Line Art Lionheart @notalogin.bsky.social · 17/09/2026

Misread this as "extreme unhappiness" and that's probably a hint I should schedule my next therapy appointment

Crossword clue reading "Extreme happiness"

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Line Art Lionheart @notalogin.bsky.social · 17/09/2026

Misread this as "extreme unhappiness" and that's probably a hint I should schedule my next therapy appointment

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Ygrene @ygrene.bsky.social · 16/09/2026

(gazing wistfully towards the horizon) candy corn’ll be ripe soon

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Line Art Lionheart @notalogin.bsky.social · 18/06/2024

When I said "rules are meant to be broken" I was talking about myself. Everybody else needs to follow the rules

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Line Art Lionheart @notalogin.bsky.social · 18/06/2025

*losing my fingers in an industrial accident* But how will I massage my kale?

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Line Art Lionheart @notalogin.bsky.social · 12/08/2024

Please listen carefully, as our options have changed. If you like making your own choices, press 1. If you believe free will is an illusion, press 1.

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MꙬse Allain @mooseallain.bsky.social · 25/09/2025

“I’m trying to find a monastery where all the monks are over six foot five” “That’s a tall order”

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Line Art Lionheart @notalogin.bsky.social · 15/09/2026

Look, if my job security was fully dependent on keeping my ghoul of a boss alive, I'd help with his tie and wheel him into the Senate chamber, too

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Johnny Normality @probgobl.in · 14/09/2026

FINALLY, WE HAVE INVENTED A JUICER THAT FEELS PLEASURE AND SATISFACTION WHEN TEARING APART FLESH TO GET TO THE SWEET SWEET FLUIDS HIDDEN WITHIN.

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Line Art Lionheart @notalogin.bsky.social · 06/02/2024

When people tell you how old their grandpa was when he died, they do NOT appreciate it if you convert it to dog years

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Raysident Evil @sireviscerate.myatproto.social · 30/04/2023

Video game idea: You go back in time to the Garden of Eden and kill Adam. It's a first person shooter.

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Line Art Lionheart @notalogin.bsky.social · 16/02/2024

My bike just got a flat tire, or, as they say in England, my bike just got an apartment tire

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Line Art Lionheart @notalogin.bsky.social · 04/12/2025

Can you repeat what you just said? I want to ignore it a second time

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Line Art Lionheart @notalogin.bsky.social · 09/09/2026

INDIGNANT HUSBAND: Get my wife's name out of your mouth [background: the wife's name is Taffy] ME [mouth full of taffy]: I'WM TFYING

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Line Art Lionheart @notalogin.bsky.social · 09/09/2026

Your honor the prosecution is chopped

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rax ‘levon honkers’ king @raxkingisdead.bsky.social · 09/09/2026

imagining a genre called ‘math ska’ and pissing my self off

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Line Art Lionheart @notalogin.bsky.social · 06/09/2024

🎶You just bake a sweet torte, Mort Make a new flan, Stan Sorbet can be soy, Roy One fudge and you're free🎶 —50 Ways to Dessert Your Lover

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Line Art Lionheart @notalogin.bsky.social · 21/06/2026

I keep a pencil and notepad in my car just for these signs; I've sketched dozens of bridges but the cops never check

Highway overpass with the sign "DRAW BRIDGE"

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Line Art Lionheart @notalogin.bsky.social · 03/09/2026

Just turned off my camera on a work call so I could pick my nose with gusto Because I am a professional

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lauren @lauren.rotatingsandwiches.com · 02/09/2026

just got word that an archive of your inner monologue has been leaked on the darkweb. more than two billion shower thoughts, power fantasies, and monologues of what you wish you had said to your crush are being downloaded and put to sinister use by Latvian teen hackers as we speak

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Line Art Lionheart @notalogin.bsky.social · 02/09/2026

SCAT COP: 🎶Be-doo-be-doo-deep-bop OTHER SCAT COP: *shits on table* CHIEF: not that kind of scat! SC1: Bop-deep-bdoop-ba-bop SUSPECT: OK, I confess.

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cap’n watsisname @capnwatsisname.bsky.social · 24/08/2026

Having to complete a second stage of captcha to prove I am a GOOD person

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John Lyon @johnlyon.bsky.social · 29/08/2026

Always check the height of nearby ceiling fans before giving a toddler a ride on your shoulders. How I learned this rule is not important.

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Line Art Lionheart @notalogin.bsky.social · 31/08/2026

Like Shohei Ohtani, I'm a two-way player Unlike Shohei Ohtani, my two ways are down and out

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Line Art Lionheart @notalogin.bsky.social · 29/05/2026

Ok I get that it's technically not a word but just imagine a prohibition-era bar full of mice in fedoras

Spelling Bee saying "Not in word list" to "Squeakeasy"

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Line Art Lionheart @notalogin.bsky.social · 17/12/2025

A lot of people find it very hard to say "I was wrong." But here's the secret: you don't have to mean it

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Line Art Lionheart @notalogin.bsky.social · 25/01/2024

By the commutative property, an octopus also has ten eightacles

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Sorrowscopes @sorrowscopes.bsky.social · 30/08/2026

Scorpio: We're getting a vision of a hippo angrily popping dozens of balloons printed with your face. Ambiguous.

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Sorrowscopes @sorrowscopes.bsky.social · 30/08/2026

Cancer: Find light in the darkness. Find warmth in the cold. Find faults in your significant other.

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Line Art Lionheart @notalogin.bsky.social · 30/08/2026

Why are we only renaming Lake Ontario? Learn from George Foreman and call all five Great Lakes "Lake America"

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Line Art Lionheart @notalogin.bsky.social · 18/10/2023

If you don't know what an abacus is, does it still count?

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Line Art Lionheart @notalogin.bsky.social · 27/10/2023

Shout-out to James Fenimore Cooper, the inventor of cooperation

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Line Art Lionheart @notalogin.bsky.social · 10/09/2024

Every woman promises herself she won't become her mom, yet here you are at the homeless shelter lacing meatloaf with cyanide. Just like her.

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Line Art Lionheart @notalogin.bsky.social · 25/08/2026

ok who moved it and didn't put it back?

Cover of book: "Where Is Our Solar System?"

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Line Art Lionheart @notalogin.bsky.social · 01/12/2023

Fun fact: truth serum is 30% rum.

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Line Art Lionheart @notalogin.bsky.social · 25/08/2026

I love to be on steering committees; if there's one thing I know about driving it's that you want as many people as possible holding the steering wheel

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