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Sarah Armento

@nosarahonlyzuul.bsky.social
763 followers 851 following 1.4K posts

journalist/writer/horror enthusiast. guitar player. robot from 1984. portland. Short story “A Special Report” up now at Andromeda Magazine: andromedamagazine.com/2024/11/01/a-…

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Sarah Armento @nosarahonlyzuul.bsky.social · 9h
my wordle score is giving me the finger ⬛⬛🟩⬛⬛ ⬛⬛🟩⬛⬛ ⬛⬛🟩⬛⬛ 🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩
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Sarah Armento @nosarahonlyzuul.bsky.social · 19h
Just another day in hell.
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Sarah Armento @nosarahonlyzuul.bsky.social · 29/09/2026
me and my friends would've killed Liberty Biberty with hammers i can tell you that much
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But Andrew Hickey Died Ten Years Ago This Very Night @andrewhickey.500songs.com · 24/09/2026
DVDs aren't low-tech. They're just things you can actually own, that won't disappear overnight, that don't require a monthly subscription, that won't suddenly get reedited, that won't start putting adverts in the middle and that won't sell your data to the worst people in the world.
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Sarah Armento @nosarahonlyzuul.bsky.social · 29/09/2026
The world would be a better place if I had the power to explode people with my mind
static.klipy.com
scanners 1981
Alt: GIF of that scene from Scanners where the guy with the glasses is about to headsplode.
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Andi Zeisler @andizeisler.bsky.social · 29/09/2026
As fallout from the Cornell story continues, do you want to hear some history about the rape-on-campus/false-accusation panic from someone who was starting college as it took shape? Because this isn’t new, and it’s going to get ugly
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Left Coast Reads 📚🌹 @leftcoastreads.bsky.social · 29/09/2026
TIL about the Polybius urban legend. Portland friends, have you heard of this? The myth is that a mysterious game appeared in Portland arcades. It disoriented users or gave them seizures. Men in suits would periodically check the game cabinets. And then it disappeared. I love Portland lore.
en.wikipedia.org
Polybius (urban legend) - Wikipedia
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jims @jims.bsky.social · 24/09/2026
i have a hot take regarding the upcoming american midterms; every year your candidates should get slightly smaller. in 2030 every elected representative should be 2 inches tall and ride a beetle to work. they should sleep under a mushroom and wear doll clothes. they should crave the falling boot,
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Sarah Armento @nosarahonlyzuul.bsky.social · 25/09/2026
Just a week away!!!!!
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Lupita Nihongo @otsumamiboy.blacksky.app · 21/09/2026
A mocked up FBI wanted poster with six variations of Bugs Bunny dressed as hilarious women

Left to right:
Classic housewife bugs bunny in a peach dress with French curls and a blue bonnet 

Sexy snow bunny bugs bunny in a form fitting yellow ski suit & red lipstick 

Classy rocket bra bugs bunny in a pink blouse and a choker and red heels and a blue skirt 

Green nightgown bugs bunny looking alluring 

Cavewoman bugs bunny in an orange tattered one piece slip making a come hither expression 

Flapper bugs bunny in a red dance outfit and a big bowler hat
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Sarah Armento @nosarahonlyzuul.bsky.social · 21/09/2026
Instead of focusing on real problems I’ve been thinking about rearranging my furniture. Is it tacky to have the TV on the fireplace mantel? Would moving it fix me?
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rob @ok-but-still.bsky.social · 20/09/2026
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Sarah Armento @nosarahonlyzuul.bsky.social · 20/09/2026
I went into The Whisper Man with low expectations and it was still pretty bad. Oof.
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Ken Jennings @kenjennings.bsky.social · 18/09/2026
I don’t usually meddle on the writing side of Jeopardy!, but tonight I called in a favor for our Bluesky viewers.
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Sarah Armento @nosarahonlyzuul.bsky.social · 18/09/2026
Friday already? #LetterboxdFriday #LastFourWatched
Screenshot of my last four watched on Letterboxd: “The Long Walk,” “Coyote vs. Acme,” “History of the Occult,” and “Scary Stories” (documentary).
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Shana @shanamd.bsky.social · 18/09/2026
I am SORRY for sharing something that was posted on the other place, but this is too good.
The future pope at a party with a caption “they don’t know I’m the future pope”
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Sarah Armento @nosarahonlyzuul.bsky.social · 17/09/2026
Thought it might be fun to give the cats a little nip but now they’re fighting in the living room like a couple of drunks
Jesus smoking a cigarette and looking done with life.
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A.J. Wilden🏳️‍⚧️ @wcwit.bsky.social · 11/09/2026
"They're not misunderstanding the film; they're co-opting a message"
Screencap from the interview linked in the quoted post

Marlow Stern (the interviewer):  You have one of the most renowned replies in Twitter history. Elon Musk tweeted out, “Take the red pill,” then Ivanka Trump enthusiastically wrote, “Taken!” to him, and then you replied, “Fuck both of you.” I’m curious how you feel about the co-opting of “The Matrix” by those on the right who don’t really seem to understand its messaging.

Lilly Wachowski: I mean, I can’t sit in a room and explain the movie to every single person who watches it. Even if I did sit in a room with Elon Musk and Ivanka Trump — yikes — it doesn’t matter. They’re not misunderstanding the film; they’re co-opting a message. And that’s what fascists do: They co-opt the messages of progressives and use it to their benefit to confuse and obfuscate what is going on and the intention of their ideology. They do it with everything. They do it with Martin Luther King Jr. Look at how they’ve changed the idea of what antisemitism is.
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Phil Nobile Jr. @philnobilejr.bsky.social · 11/09/2026
Whoever snuck “Five Years” past execs in the Meta “AI is good for you” ad, blink twice for extraction.
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Sarah Armento @nosarahonlyzuul.bsky.social · 11/09/2026
I’m sorry, I’m still mad about this - of all the songs they could debase for their slop commercial they choose fucking Five Years??
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Sarah Armento @nosarahonlyzuul.bsky.social · 10/09/2026
I just heard David Bowie’s “Five Years” in an ad for Meta AI
SpongeBob looking sick and pissed off.
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Sarah Armento @nosarahonlyzuul.bsky.social · 09/09/2026
I've got a new short story coming out in October - a ghost story. I can't say much more right now, but I'm excited to share it when it's published.
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Alex Winter @alexwinter.com · 08/09/2026
RT if you've never had a tab of ChatGPT open, period.
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Sarah Armento @nosarahonlyzuul.bsky.social · 08/09/2026
Coyote vs. Acme was so good... and the Road Runner's testimony almost made me cry? Five bags of popcorn.
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Sarah Armento @nosarahonlyzuul.bsky.social · 06/09/2026
Down with a migraine. But at least I have a nurse watching over me.
A tuxedo cat sits on my while I convalesce in bed.
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Sarah Armento @nosarahonlyzuul.bsky.social · 05/09/2026
💔
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Museum of Twitter @museum-of-twitter.bsky.social · 31/08/2026
Tweet from koyaanisqatsi heckler (@Arr):

*johnny cash in his final years, over a spare arrangement, his voice frail* he did a good job cleaning up the place, but his bosses didn’t like him so they shot him into space
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Sarah Armento @nosarahonlyzuul.bsky.social · 31/08/2026
He opened the pantry door, jumped up to the top shelf, and won’t come down. 🫠
A tuxedo cat sits on the top shelf of a kitchen pantry. He has a smug look on his face. There’s a small ladder in the foreground from my failed attempt to coax him down.A closeup of the same rude cat.
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Sarah Armento @nosarahonlyzuul.bsky.social · 30/08/2026
Late to the party again. #LetterboxdFriday #LastFourWatched
Screenshot of my last 4 watched on Letterboxd: “Muppet Treasure Island,” “Buffet Infinity,” “In The Mouth of Madness,” and “Twin Peaks Fire Walk With Me.”
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Sarah Armento @nosarahonlyzuul.bsky.social · 29/08/2026
You get older and your hormones mess with your emotions and all of a sudden you’re crying while you watch Dolly Parton sing “Jolene” with Rob Halford.
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Frances: Meh and Loving It @francesmeh.reviews · 12/03/2025
you've been hit by you've been struck by a huge vehicle
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Rolling Stone @rollingstone.com · 25/08/2026
Dolly Parton's family asked that, in lieu of flowers, fans make a donation to the singer's Imagination Library. Here's what the charity does ⬇️ www.rollingstone.com/music/music-...
rollingstone.com
Turning Pages: Inside Dolly Parton's Imagination Library
Core team of 15 staff and thousands of volunteers and partners help the country-music philanthropist deliver books to kids around the world.
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Sarah Armento @nosarahonlyzuul.bsky.social · 25/08/2026
Two things. 1. Samsung TVs are terrible. 2. Buffet Infinity is awesome. Five bags of popcorn.
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Sarah Armento @nosarahonlyzuul.bsky.social · 22/08/2026
I really wanted to watch Buffet Infinity but the Shudder TV app does not want me to sign in.
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hotsietozzi @hotsietozzi.bsky.social · 22/10/2023
Got kicked out of the liberry again cuz a couple people complained about my therapy goose Insane Willie.
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Chris Person @papapishu.bsky.social · 21/08/2026
Please stop reposting the Junji Ito Breakfast Burrito I don't even have that phobia but I'm developing it
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Adam Serwer @adamserwer.bsky.social · 20/08/2026
What makes this even more grotesque is that Doris Miller was denied the medal of honor when he was alive just because he was black. bsky.app/profile/carl...
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Aviator Animator @aviatoranimator.bsky.social · 19/08/2026
Love this level
Mario from mario galaxy flying around a cat planet, and the cat planet is just the cat sitting in the clear bowl where it looks all smushed. Sorry this isnt a better description, i, i really dont know what to say about it
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Sarah Armento @nosarahonlyzuul.bsky.social · 20/08/2026
This may have been a poor choice for lunch tho
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Sarah Armento @nosarahonlyzuul.bsky.social · 20/08/2026
goddamn i love little powdered donuts
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Dan of the Year @downwithdan.bsky.social · 19/08/2026
"this edible ain't shit" two hours later:
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Sarah Armento @nosarahonlyzuul.bsky.social · 18/08/2026
First draft is done. Now on to step 2: making it not suck.
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Dave Infante @dinfontay.com · 16/08/2026
uhhhhh
 investigation was originally developed for The New York Times, where it underwent eight months of editing, multiple rounds of fact-checking, and independent replication of the underlying methodology. The piece had a scheduled publication date when requests for comment were sent. It was only after the Times reached out to the subjects of the investigation for routine comment that the Elias Law Group, representing the DCCC and DSCC, sent a cease-and-desist letter demanding the paper not publish. Although the paper's fact-checkers and legal department later cleared the piece before sending out a second round of requests for comment, the Times ultimately decided to kill the piece.3:27
a4democracy.substack.com
The piece was subsequently slated for publication at The Bulwark, where it underwent additional fact-checking, data verification, and legal review. When requests for comment were sent to the subjects of the investigation, lawyers representing the Progressive Turnout Project and Mothership Strategies likewise responded with legal letters demanding that the article not run.
From there, publication was repeatedly delayed. The piece cleared successive rounds of legal review. When I asked for a committed publication date after months of delay, The Bulwark conditioned publication on my accepting an extensive rewrite prepared by its editors that, in my assessment, removed key empirical findings without explanation, introduced claims contradicted by the data and fact-checking record, and presented the subjects' legal defenses as my own conclusions. When I declined to publish under those terms, the piece was released back to me.
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Museum of Twitter @museum-of-twitter.bsky.social · 13/08/2026
@turbomander

I love living in the first village of an rpg man. friendly neighbors, music is chill af, we even got that one kid we adopted into the village of whom the ancient prophecy was written about. anyway there’s a big ceremony tomorrow cant wait to still be alive after it
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Sarah Armento @nosarahonlyzuul.bsky.social · 16/08/2026
It’s actually very easy to believe. The kids are all right.
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Ken Plume @kenplume.bsky.social · 03/08/2026
HULK HAVE TIME OF LIFE. NEVER FELT WAY BEFORE.
Photo of a SPIDER-MAN: BRAND NEW DAY Hulk figure holding Spider-Man aloft like he’s going to hurl him like a javelin
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Sarah Armento @nosarahonlyzuul.bsky.social · 13/08/2026
Oh my god I’m loving Widow’s Bay
static.klipy.com
Widows Bay Widows Bay Show
Alt: GIF showing a scene from the first episode of “Widow’s Bay.” The character Wycks (Stephen Root) describes the stages of a plague: “Stage 1, eyes turn white. Stage 2, loss of the five senses and delirium. Stage 3, loss of erection. Stage 4…”
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Kevin Choubacha (he/him) @choubacha.com · 13/08/2026
No one needs AI to have big naturals.
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Ramin Nasibov @nasibov.me · 12/08/2026
If you missed the solar eclipse, this is what it looked like:
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Sarah Armento @nosarahonlyzuul.bsky.social · 10/08/2026
I always imagined I’d get into witchcraft or something in my 40s but no, it’s paint-by-numbers.
A completed paint-by-numbers canvass depicting an astronaut surrounded by bright orange flowers. The full moon is huge in the background.
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